Color Me a Crime (12 page)

Don’t get me wrong, I do put on a dash of mascara and lip gloss, but I never wear all the other gunk that is sold in the aisle of the drug store that Erin can’t seem to be dragged away from when we go there.

I open the door, letting her in.

“You have to do something with this limp hair.” She tosses a strand in the air.

“They have a team that will fix it.” I look in the mirror and groan. I have no idea how I’m going to pull this off. “Just make me somewhat believable and will pass me as a porn star.”

With a lot of stuff plastered on my face, Erin says we are ready to go. With my envelope in hand and Herbie settled for the day, we start our journey to 4Play.

“You wouldn’t believe what happened with Vive last night.” Erin begins to tell me about the mixer as if I’m not getting ready to be in front of several cameras and men, naked and trying to look sexy, when sexy has never been in my vocabulary. “She flirted. And it worked!” Erin smacks the stirring wheel of the Fiat.

“I told you their auras are compatible. It isn’t just a flirt.” I look out the window, knowing that I had just wasted my breath because she really believes that Vive is only flirting when I know better.

“I think you might just have this one wrong.” She laughs. “I don’t see Buddy being her type.”

“I didn’t see Michael as yours either, but look at you now,” I mutter, remembering how I found out that my two best friends were dating.

It happened to be at one of the loneliest times in my life. I had no boyfriend, was on the brink of being thrown in jail for another murder, and my only form of income, Splitsville.com, was in jeopardy of going under. While I was oblivious to the world around me, Erin and Michael were off playing footsies behind my back.

“You aren’t going to bring that up again, are you?” Erin grips the stirring wheel, and makes a wide right turn into the parking lot of 4Play. “It’s in here, right?”

I ignore her questions. Those seem to be petty at a time like this. I am about to strip down
naked
in front of people that I didn’t know. I don’t even strip down in front of Herbie, much less a human.

“I know you are upset about what is going on, but I really do think that if the police really thought you were the killer, they would have already arrested you.” She turns the ignition off and grabs my 4Play package out from the back. “You do whatever it is you need to do while you are in there and I will snoop around the office and hopefully run upon something.”

“I hope you are right.” I take the envelope, but not before grabbing the mace from my bag. I think Erin is going to freak out when we get in there. I grab the brochures and information that I had found at Buddy’s cabin. “Be on the lookout for anything with Buddy’s information on it.”

I hand her what could be evidence that Buddy is obsessed with Felicia and knows exactly who she was before they met.

“What’s this?” She thumbs through them.

“Those are what I found when I went through Buddy’s
open
cabin window. Open as, inviting me to go in. I did not break and enter as the Park City Police stated.” I bite my lip and scan my eyes up the mirrored building, stopping at the fifth floor. Or the
filth
floor as it will be forever known to me.

“These prove that Buddy had some sort of obsession with Felicia. I think that he stalked her and she rejected him at the hoedown in front of all of those people, and that He killed her.” Easy and simple. I should be a detective.

“But you are the one who set them up on the date, so that really doesn’t make sense.” Erin is worse than Joel is; she isn’t getting any of it. I’m grasping for straws.

“Somehow, someway, he had an idea that she was in town or that she had come to Color Me Love.” That might be a long stretch, but not impossible. “Why else would he rent a cabin for three months, with nothing to do but go on dates that Color Me Love sets him up on?”

“Whoa.” Erin pulls back. “Who said all of that?”

“When I passed out. . .” I had to think for a minute…“the second time at Heifers and Ho’s, I heard Joel ask Jill all sorts of questions. She said that Buddy had rented the cabin for three months with no maid service, and he didn’t have a job. He told her he was going to find the woman of his dreams, in Park City of all places.”

“Interesting.” Erin stares out the windshield. “And you found all of these Linda Minx brochures in the cabin?”

I nod.

“And the police hadn’t taken them yet?”

“I’m not even sure if the police did a sweep of the cabin. There was even a DVD of one of Linda’s movies there.

There are only ten cars in the parking lot, which makes me believe that there are potentially ten people that are going to see me naked, or with a pasty or two on.

“What’s in that envelope anyway?” Erin asks. The Fiat beeps when she clicks the key fob to lock the doors.

“You’ll see.” There is no way I’m going to tell her. I can’t wait to see her face when she sees the skimpy outfit on me.

Silently, we ride up the elevator.

One, ding.

Two, ding.

With each ding closer to my destination of floor five, my stomach curls in knots.

“Are you sure you want to do this? You look a little pale.” Erin asks just before the bell dings for the filth, er, fifth floor.

“Right on time.” The Lucy Liu receptionist greets us from behind the counter. “I guess it’s your time to really shine. I hope you do better than yesterday.”

We follow her to the door she had shoved me through yesterday.

“Hon, you need to wait your turn. This isn’t the minajatwa try out. That is at three.” Her squint leads to a fake smile planted across her face.

“I’m not here to strip!” Erin’s mouth drops open and the lines between her eyes crease. She clears her throat. “I mean, I’m Lana’s agent.” She looks at me.

“Lana? Your name is Lana?”

I nod.
What kind of porn name is that?

“Lana Deep. And your name is?” Erin opens up her leather bound binder she brought in to look a little more official.

Lana Deep?

“Beth.” She tilts her small frame on her left leg and plants her hands on her hips.

Erin and I stare at Beth, the Asian.

“What? You’ve never seen a Chinese person named Beth?” Her brows cross. “You’re here. Not many people want to do erotic films, much less under the circumstances.”

“What circumstances?” Erin asks. “Maybe I should take Lana and leave.”

“You can’t do that. We are in a bind, and production will shut down.”

“I can’t have my client work under some sort of circumstance we don’t know about.” Erin is pulling out all the stops. I didn’t know she could be so harsh.

“Felicia’s death and all.” Beth shuts the door, and leans in as if she’s about to tell a big secret. “The police have been snooping around here. They think that the killer might be from within.”

“Really?” The excitement must show on my face.

“You seem awfully happy about it,” Beth snarls. “We are watching our backs around here.”

If what Beth says is true, then Joel really doesn’t think that I did it. Or, at least some small piece of him thinks I’m innocent.

“I’m not happy about anyone dying.” My mind is reeling. I can’t wait to see what Erin finds out.

“You stay here.” She points for Erin to sit in the chair in the small room. “We don’t allow agents or assistants in the production room because of all the extra noise.”

“What if I wait in the reception area?” Erin asks, walking over to the door. “Or better yet, is there an administration or conference room where I can sit? I have a lot of clients that have many deals on the table.”

“I’m sorry.” Beth seems a little cautious. “The only office is the one out front. The rest of the floor is set up for the entire production needs, like costumes, hair, makeup, spray tanning and an office for the producer.”

“Then I will just stay out there.” Erin turns the knob to step out.

“Can you do me a favor and watch the front?” Beth did a little dance. “I had too much coffee this morning and I need to go to the bathroom.”

“I’d love to.” Erin grins. Her crystal aura turns a murky, devious and dishonest pink. “I’ll see you soon, Lana.”

Erin goes one way and Beth goes the other, leaving me with my three pieces of pasties.

“Are you ready?” Angela peaks her head in the door. “What are you waiting on? It doesn’t take long to put your costume on and we have to do some miracles on that plain-jane face of yours,
Lana
.”

Plain-jane face?
Can’t she see all the makeup Erin had put on me before we got here?

I follow her to another room in the production area where they apply all the makeup.

“I’m having a bit of a problem.” I hold the pasties up to my boobs. “I think I would do better with a little more on.”

“Lana, have you never been in an erotica film before?” Angela’s eyebrows arch.

I look down, trying not to give her any eye contact, and flop down in the only chair in the room. Her mile-high bright red heels elongate her four-foot frame, and her cleavage takes one’s eye away from her teased-up hair.

“Girlfriend, all you have to do is act like it’s your man.” She bends down and tips my chin up to look back at her. “You do have a man, right?”

“I did, and if he ever finds out I’m doing this, he will never look at me again.” I hold the pasty next to my girl area and laugh.

“From what I gather, you aren’t really having sex with Dirk. He is hot and I mean h-o-t.” She smiles. “He will treat you like a lady, but I’ll let Hugh know that we decided on a cute nightie for you.” She winks. “Come on. I think we can play up that good-girl look you have anyway. The erotic filmgoers will love your little act.”

“Erotica? Is that what they are calling it nowadays?” I ask. I’m just use to calling a spade a spade.

Angela smiles. She gets what kind of girl I am. And she’s kind of growing on me. Big heels, big boobs, big hair and all.

Chapter Seventeen

“Thank you!” I’m giddy with glee when she walks in holding a see-through white negligee. It would have been better if she had brought me a flannel pair of pajamas, but that is obviously entirely too much to ask for.

I can see it now, in the bright lights of the erotic film awards, “
And the winner goes to Lana Deep, for her acting skills in Red Flannel Scandal.”

“This is the best I could do. Hugh is definitely not happy that Linda’s protégé has never done a film when Linda assured him that you have.” She holds the flimsy piece of cloth toward me.

“Protégé? I didn’t know her.” There is no way in hell I want them to link me to her.

“So you are telling me that I’m not dealing with her understudy?”

I slowly shake my head. For a second I thought about lying, because if they do think I’m Linda’s little minion, maybe I can learn more about her.

“Don’t tell Hugh. You for sure won’t get the job.” Angela wiggles left and right, shaking her thing as I follow her out the door onto the production floor.

I can’t help but notice that she has a shape to die for. If she lost the heels and big hair, plus a little of the makeup, I bet she is a very pretty girl.

I have to say that it’s much easier working here than anywhere I have ever worked. All the naked people and staff seem to take on the red aura of love. Which is great, because when their colors collide, they won’t make me pass out. And I am sure there isn’t a future for a passing out porn star.

“Lana love,” Hugh’s beret tilts to the side, his pudgy but tall body waddles over to me and takes my hands. He kisses my cheeks like we are in France. I follow suit. “I’ve been dying to see you today. I know you had an off day yesterday with the news of Felicia, but today is your day.” I can’t tell the difference between his eyes and the lighting because he is giddy with excitement. His aura is bright red.

I slip my hands out of his, wondering if this is what they would call an invitation to the director’s couch for a casting call.

“I really wanted to see that little bod of yours that Felicia was talking about, but this….” He stands back with one hand across his girth and the other hand resting on his cheek. “This is going to make our viewers go crazy watching you slowly take it off.”

I smile sweetly, because any minute I am going to explode and show him what real moves I can do, but then I think about Joel and clearing my name.

Hugh’s horny aura drips off him like a wet noodle. “Between you and me, I was going to fire Felicia once you came on board, because the erotica business needs this. You! Fresh young talent. She was starting to lose money. Men were sick of seeing her and stopped coming to her movies.”

What?

Did Hugh just confess? I guess it can happen. Or at least someone in the industry could have offed her. It isn’t unheard of in the conspiracy theories of the Hollywood scene---why not in the erotica film industry? I bet it happens all the time; we non-erotica watchers just aren’t privy to it.

“Lana!” Angela grabs me by the arm. “Didn’t you hear me calling you? It’s as if your real name isn’t Lana.”

“Oh, that’s just my stage name.” I smile, tucking all the information that Hugh just told me in the back of my head. “My real name is Jenn.” I smile and let her work her paint and plaster miracles on my face.

“Voila!” She hands me a hand-held mirror. “All done.”

“What do you mean?” I look at my reflection. The makeup is barely visible. As a matter of fact, she took off most of the makeup Erin had put on me.

“Hugh wants you as naked as possible.” She leans in and whispers, “He heard that your body creates beautiful music and doesn’t want to take away from that. If he only knew that you really aren’t Linda’s understudy.” She cackles. “Lana is ready.”

Suddenly all eyes are on me and my nightie.

“Okay, Lana dear, just go with the script.” Hugh yells from the director’s chair as the spotlight blinds me.

The cheesy music blares through the system. I take note of the bed draped in white linens, and a shear tent hanging from the ceiling of the production studio creates a subtle shield for the pretend act that I’m about to do.

“Cut!” Hugh yells. “Lana, are you okay?”