Cowboys and Highlanders (49 page)

“She knows.”

“That ain’t telling, TJ. That’s called showing.” Marion winked.

TJ stepped away from the table and went after Allison. He found her sitting in the empty parlor. Curled up in the velvet loveseat in the back of the room, she stared out the narrow window.

“We need to talk.” He slid his hands into the front pockets of his trousers.

“I know.”

“No, you don’t.” He crossed the room and stood beside her. “I just got a lecture from mother hen and big sister,” he said, smiling. “I’ve been a fool, Allison. It isn’t easy for me to let down my guard. I know I can force a man’s hand because I’m TJ Bester and not many people would dare cross me. Those who try, regret it.” His jaw clenched and looked up at the ceiling. “I have my reasons for wanting to marry you.”

“What are those reasons, TJ?”

Muscles in his arms tensed and he curled his fingers in a tight fist. Admitting weakness, even for a woman wasn’t easy for him. But weakness for Allison made him strong. He sat next to her. “I don’t want you to stay at the house because you’re working for me. I want you there because you love me.”

“My loving you doesn’t automatically make a good marriage. It has to be more. I’m not going to be yours or anyone else’s wife unless that man swears to be my husband. I don’t think you can. I wasn’t the one who said they would never love another. I’m not angry. I know Janelle will always be your wife.”

“I can never completely say goodbye. Sissy and Michael deserve her memory.”

“Maybe you still need her memory, too.” She placed her hand on his thigh. “I’m sorry TJ, but I can’t marry you.” Tears filled her eyes.

TJ sat rigid, letting her words sink in. As a man, Allison suited him. He had let go of Janelle. Allison was all he needed. He only had to convince her. “You are the one in my heart, in my head. I do love you.”

Allison signed. “The words don’t come from the heart when they have to be pried from your lips.”

“You are stubborn.” TJ wanted to punch the nearest wall and drag her by the hair to the justice of the peace. No. He shook his head. He’d try to be patient. Eventually she would believe him.

“TJ,” she said softly. “You decided you wanted me and thought no farther. In my heart, I know I love you and I believe you care for me. What we have is not enough for marriage, but it’s enough for me.”

“You just want me to bed you. You want to be my whore?” For as much as she claimed not to be one, she seemed to be determined to take that role.

She smiled. “Just yours.”

TJ growled and put his hand over hers. “No. I want you…as my wife. You think I need more time; I can accept that even though you’re wrong.” He leaned in to kiss her lips.

She returned the kiss then broke apart. “You’re the one who is stubborn. I don’t want you to say anything you don’t mean. I don’t want to live as my parents did. My father loved my mother. I think she loved him. They were miserable most of the time because she didn’t know how to show it. Words aren’t enough, but neither is action. A marriage needs both.”

“We have both.”

“No, we don’t. We fight and we…” She’d almost said the word.

TJ laughed.

“You don’t like losing an argument.” She folded her arms across her chest. “What kind of marriage would that be for me? The more I consider your offer, the more reservations I have.”

“Then, for now, stop considering. Visit with your friends. We’ll leave for the ranch in a couple hours.” He stood. “Check with the hotel if you need to find me.”

“I can take care of myself. And I’m sure the employees of the hotel have better things to do than keep track of you.”

“They’ll do what I say if they want to keep their jobs.”

“Oh, I see.” She smirked. “Once again the reputation of TJ Bester precedes you.”

“My reputation is well deserved.” He put his hat on. “But that isn’t why they’ll do what I say. I guess I neglected to tell you, I own the hotel.” He kissed her pursed lips and left the room.

The parlor door closed as she assimilated the information. Sandy had to have known. Of all the sneaky…she deserved the truth. Her skirts billowed around her legs as she marched back into the kitchen.

“You look flushed,” Sandy said. “He didn’t try to seduce you in my parlor, did he?”

“Isn’t that why you asked him to take me to the ranch?”

Marion giggled and leaned into Sandy. “If you did, it worked. He’s already sampled our little Allison.”

“Marion! You were supposed to keep it a secret.”

“Hmmph. You girls never cease to amaze me. Allison, when a man wants to marry, you are to exchange vows before you share your bed. Not that I have any experience with marriage.” She clapped her hands together. “Now that I have your full admission, I expect you to do the right thing. I didn’t send you to the ranch to become his whore. You could have done that right here.”

Allison braced her fists against her hips. “I’ll do exactly what I want. And for the record, I
am
going to marry him.” She yanked out a chair and sat at the table with a smile across her face. “Until he walked out the door just now, I didn’t think I would.”

“Did he tell you he loves you?” Marion asked, her eyes as wide as the saucers holding their coffee cups.

“Yes and no.” She looked at Sandy. “You understand, don’t you?”

Sandy nodded.

“I knew the butterflies I felt the first time I met TJ were special. No matter how hard I tried not to think about him, he found a way into my heart. He knew it, too.” She took a deep breath. When she exhaled, she let go of her reservations. “He could have gotten me out of the brothel by putting me to work at the hotel where we’re staying. He let me believe I was a burden. Evidently, I’m a burden he wants. He just wouldn’t admit to it.”

“Fate.” Marion rested her chin in her palm. A dreamy look clouded her eyes.

Sandy snorted. “I all but orchestrated it.” Sandy refilled her coffee cup. “I’d be dead before the two of you figured out you’d be perfect together on your own.”

“I know I’m asking a lot, but will you please attend my wedding next weekend at the ranch?”

Both Sandy and Marion rolled their eyes. “Of course.”

Allison left the brothel with a promise from Marion and Sandy. They would be at the ranch in a week’s time.

Chapter Twelve

Allison remained strangely quiet on the way back to the ranch. TJ wondered where her thoughts drifted. He had pushed hard. A woman like Allison would rather deny herself what she truly wanted than give someone the satisfaction of being right. The last time she had been backed into a corner, she’d run. He vowed this time would be different. She’d left Boston. He wouldn’t let her leave the Montana Territory.

Crickets welcomed them home. The ranch wouldn’t be awake for a few hours. They climbed the porch steps and entered the deserted house.

At the top of the stairs, Allison turned toward her room. “Where are you going?” TJ asked, slipping his hand into hers.

“To my room.” Her voice echoed in the empty hall.

“Not tonight.” TJ lead her into his room. Allison stepped near the window as TJ pulled the door closed. He turned down the lantern and watched Allison from across the room.

Silky hair draped down her back. Thinking about how it fanned across his chest while they were naked in the canyon, caused a stirring in his heart. Married or not, he intended to have her in his bed. Forever.

“The night of the fire,” he said, pulling his shirttails from the waistband of his trousers and then stripping out of his shirt. “I thought we’d lose the house. I imagined it burning to the ground. I came up here to grab papers from the safe.” He came up behind her. Outside, the blackness of the night obscured the barn. Not a star twinkled in the sky and the moon vanished. He bent his head and kissed the soft skin of her neck. “I could smell you on the bed. Since then, not a night has gone by that I haven’t dreamed about you.”

“I have a confession.” Turning around, she sat on the edge of the open window. “I slept in your bed while you were gone.” She hesitantly touched his abdominals, her fingertips tracing the grooves made from hard ranch work. He sucked in a breath and his muscles tensed. “Everything I know, I learned in the whore house.” She slipped the button of his trousers open. The fabric gaped and his cock unfurled, stretching toward his navel. She closed her hand around the shaft.

TJ moaned and threaded his fingers through her hair. He tipped her face to his, bent down and kissed her lips. “My virgin whore.” He straightened.

Allison smiled, opened her mouth and touched her tongue to the sensitive flesh. TJ said her name as if it were profane. He braced his hands against the wall on either side of her. Without offering any instruction or criticism, he let her explore every detail of his cock. She licked the tip, curled her tongue around the head and, taking as much of the stalk as she could, she rolled her lips down the length.

Allison’s mouth was a warm wet cave. As she tasted, lashing her tongue over the taut flesh, she mewled her pleasure. TJ’s balls tingled and tightened, but he didn’t want to come like this. He wanted buried in her sweet heat.

“Sugar, not like this.” He slipped from her mouth. Taking her hands, he pulled her to her feet and backed her toward the bed. “I need to be inside you.” More than he needed air, he burned to drive deep into her silken core.

TJ lifted her hair and traced the curve of her neck with his lips. “Take off your skirt.”

She unhooked the side clasp and it fell to the floor.

“Take off everything.” He tasted the shell of her ear as she worked her underclothes down her legs. Slipping the buttons free, she opened her blouse. Her fingers trembled. The blouse dropped from her shoulder, slipped down her arms, and fluttered to the floor. TJ turned her, his chest to her back, and trailed his fingers along her skin until he held the heavy weight of her breasts in his hands, stroking the hard, cherry peaks with his thumbs. Aligning his hips to hers, he cradled his erection in the cleft of her ass.

Allison angled her head, looking over her shoulder. TJ captured her lips, thrusting his tongue into her mouth, desperate to do the same to her body. He eased her onto the bed until she lay on her back.

“Spread your legs.”

She hesitantly widened her thighs. Moisture glistened on her nether lips. TJ groaned as he shucked his pants, climbed onto the bed with her, and positioned between her thighs. He had to be inside her, now. Fiery heat licked his loins. He plunged hard and fast, filling her completely, savoring the sweet tightness.

“Tell me how you feel,” he whispered, pulling out and filling her again.

Allison’s chest rose and fell with each word she spoke. “I see stars when I close my eyes.” She moaned and arched off the bed. “I’m coming apart.” Her body sought TJ’s heat. The intensity built inside of her. “I can’t get close enough.” She held him tight, digging her fingernails into the hard, muscle of his shoulders. She wrapped her legs around his hips. Her body bucked. Bright light blinded behind closed eyelids. She cried out her pleasure, breaking into a million little pieces.

TJ growled, tensed, and followed her orgasm with his own. His cock pulsed deep inside her. He continued to thrust, penetrating deep. Her womb contracted. She shivered and melted, dissolving into a quivering release. She held to the pleasure until the final spasms ebbed.

TJ collapsed beside her. Allison curled into his contours, a contented sigh slipping from her lips.

* * * * *

Rain pelted the window when Allison woke a few hours later. TJ wrapped an arm possessively around her waist. They touched from shoulder to toes. When she tried to move away from him, he tightened his hold.

“Where do you think you’re going?”

“Coffee, breakfast, get ready for the children to return.”

“No one knows were back. I think we should stay in bed all day and listen to the rain.” He kissed her neck.

“No one knows we’re home,
yet
. As soon as someone checks the horses they will.”

“Who cares?” He sounded like a petulant child. “They’ll assume we arrived late, and we’re still asleep.”

“There’s too much work to be done and not much time.” She slid out of his arms, pulling the covers with her. She clutched the blanket to her breasts as she looked for her clothes.

TJ propped up on an elbow. “There’s always time.” He patted the bed.

“You have work to do as well. I could use some help cleaning the chandeliers.” She bent over to pick up her skirt.

“I like this angle.”

Still bent, she narrowed her eyes, glancing at him lounging on the bed. When she stood, she flipped her hair out of her face. “We have a week to get this house in perfect condition. You still have some cleanup left over from the fire.”

“What happens in a week?” he asked, sitting up.

“Oh, I guess I forgot to mention.” A smile spread across her lips. “I invited Marion and Sandy to the house. They promised to come.” She found her blouse and put it on. She tossed him his trousers, but he set them aside. “If you don’t get dressed, we won’t get anything done. And if I’m to have the perfect wedding, I’m going to need your help.”

TJ leapt off the bed in a flash. He picked her up in his arms. “When did you change your mind? Never mind, I don’t care.” He kissed her mouth and hauled her onto the bed.

“No.” She laughed.

TJ tore her clothing in his haste to get her undressed again. She pushed his hands away, squirmed out from underneath him and scrambled off the bed. “No more farming or fertilizing.” She waved her hand. “Or whatever it is you call it when you ravish a woman.” Her Bostonian accent grew thicker with her nervousness.

“I believe the word you’re looking for is plowing, and as my future wife—”

“Your future wife worked in a brothel. I know a good deal about plowing.” She held out her hand to stop his approach. “But we can’t. I promised Sandy. TJ, don’t.” He continued to stalk closer to her. She squealed, and then sprinted for the door.

TJ blocked her exit with his arm. “You know what I’m waiting for.”

Allison slipped her arms around his neck and stood on her tiptoes. After kissing his lips she whispered, “Yes, but you’re not going to get it.”

“I’ll change your mind.” He feverishly explored her mouth, kissing, tongues tangling. He grasped a handful of her hair, gently pulled her head back, and gazed into her eyes. “I swear, I’m going to make you a good husband.”

“But you can’t say anything to anyone. Not yet. Not until I talk to Joseph.”

TJ sighed and loosened his hold on her. “Ah, hell.”

“You were right. I haven’t been fair to him, but I was honest. I know I’m still going to hurt him.”

TJ groaned. “He’ll hurt, but he’ll understand.”

“I hope you’re right.”

A few minutes later, she went to find Joseph and TJ went for the children. She found him in the stables, cleaning out stalls.

“I see you made it back,” he said. “I didn’t think you’d be back this soon. How’d it go with TJ?” He stopped working and leaned against the handle of the pitchfork.

She didn’t answer right away. Her stomach knotted and her nerves tingled with anxiety. She sat on a bale of hay, and folded her hands in her lap. “I think we should talk.”

His lips pursed. “You made a decision, I take it?” He inhaled through his nose. Breaking TJ’s rule of no smoking in the stables, he pulled his pouch of tobacco from his pocket. “What happened?”

“Enough. We’re going to be married on Saturday. I’m sorry, Joseph. I thought if I put him in the back of my mind, he’d stay there.”

He rolled his shoulders, took a long drag off his smoke, and ran his hands through his hair.

The knot in her stomach coiled tighter. Pain played across his face. His jaw ticked and his nostrils flared as he took another deep breath. Seeing Joseph work through his emotions, Allison understood TJ’s concern. Because she couldn’t have TJ, didn’t mean she had a right to give Joseph false hope. Her eyes filled with tears. “I’m sorry,” she whispered.

“TJ’s my best friend. I’m not mad at you or at him. Hell, TJ always gets the girl.”

Allison stood in front of him and made him look at her. “At least now he’s off the market. The next girl’s for you.”

He smiled. “I don’t expect another woman like you to hitch a ride out here to become a ranch hand. You’re special. Don’t let TJ change you.”

Joseph deserved better than she gave him. Moreover, his understanding didn’t lessen her guilt. “Believe me when I tell you his heart is in this marriage. Nothing you or I do can change him. I accept that. I don’t want to change him. I’m doing this—marrying TJ—for me. He won’t change me. He claims he doesn’t want to. I believe him. He says he needs me and I know the children need me.” She spoke softly. “And I need him.”

To say anything more to Joseph was inappropriate now. Like her soon to be husband, she wanted her marriage and the secrets therein to remain private. A special connection only she and TJ would ever share. But she needed one more thing from Joseph.

“I have no right, but I want to ask a favor of you.” She took a steadying breath. “Will you stand with TJ? I know he won’t ask because he’s afraid there’s going to be bad blood between the two of you. I know I’m asking for more than I deserve. I never meant to come between the two of you.”

“There’s no problem.” He snuffed out his cigarette against a wood post. “Don’t tell on me for smoking in the barn.” She threw her arms around his neck, but Joseph kept distance in the embrace. “Where is he? Probably best if I see him right away. I want to be the first to say congratulations.”

“He went to get Sis and Michael. Come up to the house for coffee and we’ll wait for him.”

“I think I’m going to need something a little stronger.”

She linked her arm with his. Then they made their way up the hill to the house. “I think somewhere there is a very, lucky girl waiting to be swept off her feet by you.”

“If you see her, could you bring her home?”