Crave Me (The Good Ol' Boys #4) (6 page)

I was almost twelve years old and settling into my new life. Another three years had flown by. The life and memories I once knew went right along with it. Everyday I remembered my parents less and less. Everyday another piece of my heart went missing, disappearing and leaving me with nothing but the hollow, empty space that formed in its place.

I read and I wrote a lot.

I had a huge collection of books. My otherwise neat room was filled with stacks of novels. Stories that were poured out of someone’s heart and soul onto a piece of paper for another person’s enjoyment. These books were my freedom.

Sometimes the books were about epic love and other times they were deeper than that, life lessons on yellowed paper. My collection was quite impressive thanks to my uncle who spared no expense to indulge me. I loved getting lost in the fictional worlds of the author’s creations. It took away the pain from my own.

My way of escaping.   

My book friends.

Where I was loved, cared for, and cherished. Where there’s always a happily ever after and the hero always ends up with the heroine. Those were my favorite kinds of stories.

Except, my story wouldn’t be one of those, and I knew that even then.

I’d been writing in a journal for the last few years. At first it was memories of my parents so I wouldn’t forget them, but then somewhere along the way I began writing about my feelings and emotions.

My journal became more therapeutic than a remembrance of the people I tried to keep so deeply in my heart.

Esteban caught me writing a few times, and to my surprise, he never asked to read what I wrote. He never even asked what I was writing.

He just called it, “The window to your soul.” Which was all he ever said about it.

Esteban was a man of very few words, but when he did talk, it meant something. I really liked that about him. He never felt the need to fill the silence with meaningless banter. So when he said something I really listened, appreciating the wisdom he may have to offer.

I’d changed schools four more times in the last three years and at the rate I was going, there wouldn’t be any more schools to transfer to.  A few things changed with my uncle for the better I guess. He was around a lot more, and we ate dinner together a few nights a week. He asked me how my day was and if there was anything I needed or wanted. That was pretty much the extent of our conversations, but at least he tried.

“How was class?” Esteban asked, pulling me away from my thoughts.

I started taking a creative writing course outside of school. The instructor was nice and most of the students kept to themselves, lost in their own thoughts about what they would be writing on the blank pages of the notebooks placed in front of them.

“It was good,” I answered, looking at his face in the rearview mirror as he drove.

“I bet you write better than all your friends.”

I scoffed. “You’re my only friend, Esteban.”

Our eyes locked through the rearview mirror.

“You listen to me, and you’re there when I need you. I guess you’re my chosen person,” I shyly smiled.  

He didn’t falter. “I’m not your friend, Daisy,” he informed, catching me off guard. 

My happy moment was quickly replaced with disappointment.  

“I’m your bodyguard and driver. I work for your uncle. Don’t ever forget that,” he rudely added, focusing back on the road in front of him as if I didn’t exist.

He’d never treated me like that before, and I tried to hide my tears because in my mind I thought he was my friend.

The only one I had.

“That feel good, baby?” I groaned into her ear, rubbing her clit in slow progressive circles.  

For the life of me I couldn’t remember her name.

Jennifer, Jenny, Jen something?

It’s not like I was looking to date her, take her to the goddamn prom, or God forbid, back home to meet my mama.

Her body shuddered beneath mine the harder I moved my fingers on her pussy. She was so fucking wet, and I resisted the urge to bring my fingers up to my mouth to taste her. I claimed her mouth instead, mostly to drown out how fucking loud she was. Not that it mattered how loud we got, the music from the party downstairs was blaring through the speakers below us.

“Right there,” she panted against my lips.

“Here?” I taunted, thrusting two fingers inside her.

One thing changed after that day on the dock with Alex almost a year ago. One very important thing.

I didn’t give a fuck anymore.

Zero. Fucks. Given.

“Fuck ‘em and chuck ‘em,” was Dylan’s motto. I decided to adopt his attitude, and I swear to God it made my life so much easier. No stress, no drama, no worries. No more of the emotional bullshit and baggage that ran my life with
Half-Pint and her good ol’ boys
.

I did what I wanted. When I wanted. How I wanted.

If you didn’t like it…

You could go fuck yourself.

Being a pansy-ass follower got me nowhere, and at least now I didn’t have to pretend to be something I wasn’t. I didn’t have to march in line with my dick tucked between my legs waiting for the boys to realize I was just like them. Proving to them…

I was.  

I let myself go and enjoyed what life had to offer. I spent way too many years caring about what other people wanted, what other people thought, what other people expected. Years of pent-up frustration came coursing out of me.

I’d been caught inside of a wave for far too long. It was only a matter of time until I wiped out. 

“Harder, faster,” she moaned, rotating her hips against my hand.

Her pussy got so damn tight as I fucked her with my fingers. Her mouth parted letting a moan escape. Her soft, wet tongue peeked out, licking her lips, biting the bottom between her teeth. I took in her soft glow, her rosy cheeks, the subtle sweat pooling at her temples. Watching her tits bounce with each thrust of my hand, the way her back would curve each time I hit her sweet spot. Her hands fisted into the blankets beneath us and her body arched just slightly at the last second as she came all around my fingers.

My dick throbbed and my balls ached.

She smiled, opening her eyes. “Your turn.”

“Is that right?”

She nodded, pressing her hands against my chest to flip me over and straddle me. I assumed she was just going to suck my cock, so when she grabbed a condom from her purse, I pretended that I wasn’t taken aback. She unbuckled my belt and pulled down my jeans, followed by my boxers. My shirt was already off. My hard cock sprung free, smacking against my stomach.   

“Wow,” she breathed out.

My dick twitched from the praise.

She seductively smirked as she slid her way down my body. Slowly kissing along my abs, only stopping when her face was just above my cock. She looked up at me through her lashes, grinning with glazed eyes and an allure I had only just witnessed. She slipped the head of my dick into her awaiting mouth, using her hand to work my shaft. I lay back with my fingers laced behind my head, watching with hooded eyes as she sucked my cock like she had something to prove, enjoying the sensation she stirred in my balls.

It was almost too much.

I gripped the back of her neck and pushed her head lower down my shaft until she gagged, making me groan from the vibration. She released my dick with a pop and tried to hand me the condom. I shook my head no. She understood my silent order and ripped it open with her teeth, sliding it down my length in one swift movement.  

Crawling up my body in a slow, steady stride, she hovered above me, waiting in anticipation for my next move. I didn’t falter. Grabbing my cock, I angled it toward her opening and she effortlessly slid down. Her pussy was so fucking tight. My eyes shut and my head fell back against the pillow, taking in the feeling of her warm heat wrapped around me. I clutched her hips, gliding her down my shaft.

“Fuck,” I growled, loud and hard.

“Jesus, you’re as big as some of the seniors. Are you sure you’re only a freshman?”

I ignored her stupid question. Leaning forward, I pulled her toward me by the nook of her neck, our lips collided, rough and eager. I sucked her tongue in my mouth when she started to ride the shit out of my cock. Back and forth, up and down, keeping a steady rhythm like a goddamn pro.

“Fuck… you feel good,” I groaned in between kissing her.

It fueled her desire to work me over harder and more aggressively, each sway of her calculated hips hitting every spot that drove me closer and closer to the edge of release. I couldn’t hold back any longer, it felt too fucking good. I flipped us over, needing to control the movements before I blew my load in less than a few minutes.

She placed her legs on my shoulders. “Like that. It feels so much better like this,” she panted, mimicking my breathing.  

I pounded the fuck out of her tight, wet pussy, in and out.

Forcefully.

Urgently.

Demandingly.

I took what I needed, and she gave what she wanted.

“I’m going to come,” I huskily groaned.

“Me too, I’m almost there,” she moaned loudly.

The second I felt her tighten around me, I came so fucking hard that I saw stars. I fell on top of her, sweat dripping from both our bodies, her legs sliding off my shoulders. We both lay there breathless, our hearts beating rapidly, lost in our own thoughts I was sure. I pulled out my cock and got off the bed, walking into the bathroom to get rid of the condom.

When I came back in the room, the smell of smoke assaulted my senses. She was sitting up against the headboard, a thin white sheet covering her body. She looked like an angel, even though I knew she was anything but. Her thumb and index finger held what appeared to be a rolled up cigarette firmly placed between her lips. She sucked in, long and hard, holding in the smoke for a few seconds before exhaling slow and steady.

There was something seductive about the way she did it. I stood there and watched her take another drag, observing the picture that was being painted in front of me with a hypnotic allure that drew me toward her, instead of leaving the room like I probably should have.

“Want a hit?” she purred, extending her hand out in my direction.

I’d never done drugs before, but that didn’t stop me from contemplating doing it. I sat next to her on the bed, not bothering to get dressed.

“Sex and weed are always a great combination,” she added, taking one more hit before handing me the joint.  

I took one last look at the random chick in front of me and then closed my eyes.

All I saw was
her
face.

Bringing the joint up to my lips, wanting to forget that I just had sex for the first time with a girl…

I didn’t crave.

I stared down at the blood on my panties for I don’t know how long. Thinking maybe if I looked at it long enough it would magically disappear or something.

It didn’t.

I was twelve and I had just gotten my period for the first time. I didn’t have a clue what to do about it. It wasn't like I had a mother or any other female around to guide me.

I lived with men.

Normally, I probably would have asked Esteban to help me, but ever since that day in the car, he barely spoke to me anymore.

I was a job to him, and he started treating me like one.

I jumped suddenly from a loud, hard knock on the door.

“Briggs? What the hell are you doing in there? You’ve been in there for almost an hour,” Uncle Alejandro barked through the door, surprising me that he even noticed.

I didn't answer him. What was I supposed to say? I glanced around the bathroom hoping the floor would swallow me whole. I wasn't that lucky. I immediately pulled up my panties and slid down my skirt. Taking a deep breath, I opened the door, but my eyes remained down on the ceramic tiled floor.

“What the fuck?”

“I’m bleeding,” I murmured.

“Peladita, what part of look me in the eyes when I’m talking to you is so hard for you to fucking understand?”

I instantly looked up at him with annoyance written all over my face. Head cocked, nostrils flaring, lips pursed, with my hands in fists at my side.

“Is that all you care about? Fine! I'm looking you in the eyes and telling you I'm bleeding! Better?"

Maybe my period made me stupid?

“You watch your fucking tone with me, little girl,” he sneered, looking me up and down. “What did you do? Cut yourself?”

I scoffed. “No I didn’t cut myself! I’m twelve years old and a female! You’re a smart guy, put two-and-two together!”

He opened his mouth probably to yell at me, but quickly shut it when he realized what I was implying. He did it a few more times, looking at me speechless, which only added to my frustration.

“Are you just going to stand there and be all…
you
?” I asked, pointing at him. “Because the longer we stand here, the more the blood keeps coming—”

He put his hand out in front of him, shushing me. “Enough.”

“Well… then help me. I don’t know what to do,” I pleaded with desperation in my tone.

“Why are you telling me this? Why don’t you tell your nanny? She’s a woman.”

I sighed. “She doesn’t like me.”

“And you think I do?”

His words didn’t faze me. The feeling was mutual.

“In this case, you’re the lesser evil.”

Without another word he pulled out his phone, turned around and started to walk away, completely ignoring my rant. I followed close behind, assuming I was supposed to. He made his way into his office, still not acknowledging me. I sat down in one of the chairs in front of his desk.

“Don’t get too comfortable,” he snapped.

“Si, señor,” Esteban announced, walking into the office before I could give any thought to what he’d said to me.

Oh, God. Please, please, please, don’t let him do what I think he’s about to…

“La pelada se desarrolló,” Uncle crudely revealed, “
The girl just got her period for the first time
.” His phone rang. “She’s your job. You deal with it.” He nodded at Esteban, answered his phone, and left.

I sat there in shock, completely silent. Embarrassment couldn’t even begin to describe how I felt. I wanted the floor to cave in and swallow me whole. I stared at the doorway for I don’t know how long after he left. My face burned from humiliation and anger that he would do this to me. I finally glanced over at Esteban who was frozen in place, awkwardly rubbing the back of his neck for comfort.

He did the same thing my uncle did. He opened his mouth a few times to say something, but nothing ever came out.

“So… are you…” He narrowed his eyes at me, confused. “I mean… does it… what…
fuck
,” he stressed the last word and it was the first time I heard him cuss.

“I don’t know.”

He cocked his head to the side.

“I mean…” I shrugged. “I don’t know what to do.”

“Me and you both, kid.” He laughed nervously.

“Do you happen to have a wife or girlfriend, or someone I could maybe talk to?”

He shook his head no.

“No friend that’s a girl?” I added, stunned.

He shook his head no again.

The realization that Esteban and I might’ve had more in common than I thought was a bigger rude awakening than getting my period.

“Can you walk?” he asked, pulling me away from my thoughts.

“Yeah, I got my period, I’m not incapacitated.”

We both grinned.

“Come on, smart ass. I guess we could go to the pharmacy. We can’t be the only dummies that have ever walked in there with this problem.”

I went to the bathroom before we left to add more toilet paper to my panties. I felt like I was wearing a diaper the entire time, but to my surprise the pharmacist behind the counter was very understanding. She said her daughter was around my age and she went through the same thing with her a few days prior.

I breathed a sigh of relief.

She didn’t ask me any questions as we walked down the feminine aisle. She just stopped every few steps to show me all the different kinds of tampons and pads I could use. Explaining which ones she thought would be best for me. She even went as far as pulling out a pamphlet that demonstrated how to insert it. She told me that I needed to start seeing a gynecologist because I was becoming a woman and the doctor could further explain what would start happening to my body.

“Everything okay?” Esteban asked as he saw us making our way back to the counter.

She put her arm around me in a comforting gesture. “Everything is perfectly fine. It’s nice of you to help your sister out, we don’t see that often, it’s usually the moms that deal with these kind of situations,” she said.

“He’s not my—”

“No problem,” he cut me off.

I didn’t give any thought on why he interrupted me. I’d had enough drama in the previous few hours. I took a long, hot shower when I got home, threw away my ruined underwear and used the dreaded tampon. Wanting to forget about the day from Hell.

Wishing my mom was there with me.

I gasped, placing my hand over my heart when I walked back into my bedroom. My uncle was sitting on the armchair in the corner of my room.

“Don’t you knock?”

“It’s my home,” he simply stated.

“Yeah, well it’s my bedroom,” I responded while holding onto my towel for dear life.

He was over to me in three strides, almost knocking me over.

“I’m going to overlook that you’re acting like a disrespectful
puta
because of the changes you’re going through.” He leaned in close to my face. “But if you speak to me like that again, I have no problem letting you meet the man behind the expensive suit.”

I jerked back, swallowing hard. Immediately understanding his subtle threat.

“Now,” he stepped back and I let out the breath I didn’t realize I held, “Esteban says everything was taken care of.”

I bit my tongue and just nodded.

“I’ve made an appointment with the female doctor for you.”

My eyebrows lowered. “How did you—”

“It’s next week. After you’re done with that bitch-causing thing.”   

With that he turned and left.

I changed into some sweatpants and a t-shirt, getting ready to climb into bed when I saw a glass of water and two Ibuprofens sitting on my nightstand next to my book.

I chuckled, shaking my head in amazement.