Read Crazy for Lovin’ You Online
Authors: Teresa Southwick
Your sister.
The thought came instantly. For a moment he was afraid he'd said it out loud. But her quizzical expression didn't change to shock or disapproval. “Define special.”
Without hesitation she said, “Taylor.”
Bull's-eye, he thought. But Mitch knew that it was pointless to admit that he was in love. He was wrong for Taylor. Her father had made it clear he wasn't good enough for Jensen. Just because Mitch loved a different daughter didn't mean the man would change his mind.
“Who would want an old Texas tumbleweed like me?” he asked, desperate to change the subject.
“A better, easier question isâwhat living, breathing woman wouldn't?” she said laughing.
There was only one woman he wanted to want him. But she was filet mignon; he was hamburger. He cared too much to drag her down to his level.
He shook his head. “No. I'm a lonerâalways was, always will be.”
“You don't still have a chip on your shoulder, do you?”
“Hey, this is me,” he said, trying to grin.
“Yeah, I know.” Her green eyes seemed to laser straight into his soul. “Do you need me to tell you
you're
okay?”
“It's not your job.”
“But someone's got to do it or you'll blow a good thing with my sister.”
“What makes you thinkâ”
She held up her hand. “It doesn't take a mental giant. You've been here for several weeks under the same roof. I talk to her almost every day. I can read between the lines. Besidesâ”
“What?” he asked.
“You never talked to me the way you did to Taylor. You never opened up with me like you did with her. More than once I came downstairs after getting ready for our date and I'd hear the two of you talking about all kinds of things. And laughing. With me you were intense and closed-off.”
He shrugged. “It was easy to talk to Taylor. I didn't feel like I had to impress her. I didn't have to be good enough. Until now,” he added softly, and not for her to hear.
“Dad's gone,” she said meeting his gaze with a look that told him she had heard. “As the eldest member of the family it
is
my job to tell you you're okay. If he were here, I know he would say he'd been wrong about you. He would tell you that you're a good man and proudly welcome you to the family.”
“Do you really believe that?” he asked, hoping it was the truth.
“With all my heart. For the record,” she said, “you're more than okay.”
Years of self-doubt began to melt away. That chip
on his shoulder as big as Texas fell off. He finally felt free.
He nodded, then let out a long breath. “What about you? Anyone special in your life?”
A sad expression turned her moss-colored eyes a darker shade of green. “I had my shot at love. It was wonderful while it lasted. But I guess one year is all destiny meant for me to have.”
“There hasn't been anyone else?” Taylor had told him as much. But it was hard to believe a woman as beautiful as Jen hadn't had another relationship.
She shook her head and smiled, but it was sad around the edges. “I never wanted anyone else.” She met his gaze and rested her hand on his forearm. “Don't worry about me, Mitch.”
“I'm not.”
“Prevaricator.”
“You think I don't know you just called me a liar?” he asked, his mouth curving up in a reluctant smile.
She laughed. “You're good. And you're a nice man. I don't deserve it after what I did to you. But I guess what goes around comes around.”
“You and I were kid stuff, Jen. Losing Zach was not your punishment for what happened. It was just one of those things.”
“If you say so.”
Mitch ran his hand through his hair. “I have to ask. Would you do the same thing again? Marry Zach, I mean.”
“In a heartbeat.” She released a big sigh. “Except I wouldn't hurt you like I did. But with all my heart I believe that it's better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all. So don't be an idiot. Tell Taylor how you feel.”
“Yes, ma'am,” he said, taking her hands and giving them a friendly squeeze. “The guy who gets you is going to be one lucky son of a gun. Thanks, Jen.”
He leaned down and kissed her cheek, then pulled her into his arms for a brotherly bear hug. In that moment, he knew. He'd come face-to-face with his past and looked it square in the eye. It didn't have power over him anymore. He wanted roots, home, familyâwith Taylor. As soon as he saw herâ
Distantly he heard the sound of boots at the end of the upstairs hall. “I saw your car, Jen. Where the heck are you hiding?” That was Taylor's voice.
Before he could back away from Jen, he heard a sharp intake of breath. He turned just in time to see the sparkle die in Taylor's eyes. He quickly dropped his arms to his sides. “Taylor.”
“I'm sorry. I didn't mean to interrupt,” she said, not looking at him.
“You weren't. We were just discussing old times.” Jensen smiled. “Hi, little sister.” She opened her arms and the two hugged. There was no mistaking the fierce and genuine affection they shared.
Mitch envied that. The only feeling he'd had that was even close was the bond he had shared with Dev, Grady and Jack back in high school. He couldn't imagine brothers being closer than the four of them. He couldn't imagine a closer relationship. Until nowâuntil Taylor.
He saw the bruised expression in her eyes and wanted to assure her that he felt nothing romantic for Jen.
“Taylor, listenâ”
“How was the drive up from Dallas?” she asked, cutting him off, not even looking in his direction.
“Long,” Jen answered.
Taylor smiled, but it was phony and not enough to chase the shadows from her eyes. “So what's up? Are you two getting reacquainted?”
“Nothing more than old friends catching up,” he said, knowing it wasn't enough.
“We've been talking about the past,” Jen said.
“Anything you want to tell me?” Taylor asked, trying to make her voice light.
Mitch had something very important to tell her, but this wasn't the time or place. He had to do it right. He'd been given a “do over” and he was determined not to screw it up the way he had ten years ago. As soon as his responsibility to the rodeo was over, he planned to have a serious heart-to-heart with Miss Taylor Stevens. Wine, flowers and dinner at a very expensive restaurant would be involved.
He wanted to reassure her, but it would have to wait until they were alone and he could do it the way he wanted. Hot wet kisses would definitely be involved. But he had a rodeo to kick off.
Mitch walked to the doorway. “I've got to get over to the arena and make sure everything is ready. I'll see you two later.”
Taylor could almost hear her heart crack as Mitch disappeared. She was the world's biggest idiot. A three time loser. She'd lost her fiancé to his first love and still that hadn't been enough to keep her from falling in love with Mitch all over again. Seeing her sister in his arms made her chest ache so much that she could hardly catch her breath. It was destiny. They were back together again.
Jensen put her hands on her hips. “Does he know yet?”
“What?”
“That you're in love with him.”
“Nope.” She realized she'd been cornered into all but admitting her feelings. Exasperated, Taylor glared at her sister. “I hate when you use your legal training. I'm not in love with Mitch.”
“The way you look at him says differently. I saw pictures of Zach and I together and I looked at him exactly the same way.”
“Zach loved you back,” Taylor pointed out, trying to shift attention away from herself.
“Yeah.”
The strained tone in Jen's voice made Taylor look more closely at her sister and the odd expression on her face. “Zach did love you, didn't he?”
Jen shook her head as if to clear away unwanted images. She smiled, but it was a little wobbly around the edges. “Of course he loved me. But we're talking about you and Mitch. If you're still in love with him, you have to tell him.”
“Nope. I did that once. He told me I kiss like a little girl and I was homely as a mud fence.”
“He didn't!”
“Not exactly,” Taylor admitted. “But the little girl part is true.”
“That was ten years ago. I'd bet the ranch that he feels differently now.”
“You can't bet the ranch. It's mine. I bought you out,” Taylor reminded her. “And I don't believe he feels differently at all.”
He still loves
you,
she thought.
“You're not upset because he kissed me?” She put her hands on her hips. “And that was nothing more than a bury the hatchet hug.”
“I couldn't care less what you and Mitch do.”
“Whoppers like that are going to send you straight to hell.”
Speaking of whoppers, what hurt the most was that his heart-stopping, soul-stirring, toe-curling kisses had been a lie.
Jen shook her head. “I think Mitch might be in love with you.”
“I think you're crazy.”
“Wouldn't it be better to know for sure if he cares?”
Taylor
was
sure. She loved Mitch and he wanted her sister. And she'd been wrong. The heartache wasn't the same as she'd known ten years ago. It was ten times worse. Somehow she would have to find a way to survive it.
Jen met her gaze. “Love deeply and passionately. You might get hurt, but it's the only way to live life completely.”
Taylor would have to learn to live life a lot
less
completely. “You should take your own advice, big sister.”
“We're talking about you. I had my chance at happiness. And even knowing what I know now, I wouldn't change marrying Zach. A love like that only comes along once. Life is too short to miss opportunities.”
“Life
is
too short,” Taylor agreed, hoping that would make her sister drop the subject.
“Not only that, great love and great achievements involve great risk. You're on the threshold of both.” Jen took her cosmetic bag into the bathroom. “I think I'll freshen up before we go to the rodeo.”
Taylor shook her head when she was alone. Leave it to Jen to go from lofty ideals to the basics of great
skin care. She respected her sister a great deal. But no way would she tell Mitch how she felt, knowing for sure how he felt about Jen.
For a moment, anger welled up in her. Jen had given him up. She'd handed her heart to another man and walked away. A fierce desire to fight for the man she loved grew inside Taylor. Then she remembered. The last time she'd done that, humiliation and heartache had been her reward. It was about time she learned from her mistakes, because she didn't think she could handle it if he rejected her again.
After seeing her sister in Mitch's arms, a ton of bucking bull couldn't convince her to bare her soul to him again. Ten years ago Jen was everything he'd wanted.
“And I'm still just me,” Taylor whispered to the empty room.
F
our days later on the last night of the rodeo, Taylor sat alone on the hard metal bleachers, watching the activity in an arena illuminated as bright as day by powerful spotlights. The smells of popcorn, peanuts, hot dogs and cotton candy mingled in the air around her while she watched the last team-roping duo compete. When the first rope fell short and the animal outran the second, she knew that Cal White and April Richter would take the event. She couldn't help being proud of two of her teen employees, and clapped excitedly when their names were announced as the winners.
Then she saw Mitch. When he walked into the center of the arena, she noticed he limped slightly. He must be tired. The thought tugged at her heart. And when her pulse skipped at the sight of him, she realized something. The Mitch Rafferty adrenaline rush was much more thrilling than anything she'd experienced while competing.
Although her heart was broken, she knew she would find the strength to go on. But the part of her that could care about any man but Mitch was frozen forever. It had disintegrated ten years ago, deactivated by a laser look from his bad-boy blue eyes.
“Folks, we're going to take a break while we have the tractor smooth out the arena for the barrel racing and pole bending events.” Static from his microphone stopped him and he checked the tiny device clipped to his collar, then the small square contraption attached to his belt. “Better?” he asked, and a murmur of assent whispered through the crowd.
He proceeded to announce sportsmanship awards to a senior girl and boy, and a memorial scholarship. The overall point winners were named and the rookie cowboy and cowgirl. “And finally, I'd like to announce that this year's rodeo queen is April Richter. C'mon up here, April.”
The blond, cute-as-a-button girl quickly walked to the center of the arena and Mitch placed the traditional tiara over the crown of her black Stetson. She said something to him and he nodded.
“April would especially like to thank her parents and the rest of her family for their support. Congratulations, April.”
When the teenager walked away, Mitch continued. “There are some people I need to thank for helping me put this shindig together. The board of directors of the Texas High School Rodeo Association. Bonnie Potts organized the timers. Grady O'Connor provided security. Dev Hart, our stock contractor and pickup man.”
The sound of his voice, the look of him, so tall, strong, and confident in the spotlight all conspired to
make Taylor realize he was a perfect match for her sister. He had well and truly left her behind. Againâand for good this time. He didn't need her, and the realization was so painful it stole her breath. She stood and climbed down the stairs to the bottom of the bleachers.
“I'd also like to thank Taylor Stevens for opening the Circle S ranch to us. We'd have had this rodeo even if we had to shut down I-20. But it wouldn't have come off so well. Let's give Taylor a big hand before she gets away.”
He'd been watching her! Before she could take that thought any further, a round of applause rang through the air. Cheeks warm with embarrassment, Taylor turned and waved to the crowd in the bleachers.
“Taylor is about to open the doors to her dude ranch. To show our appreciation for her help, let's spread the word about the best-kept secret in Texasâthe Circle S, B&B Western style. She wants to show as many folks as possible what traditional Western hospitality is all about. Show stressed-out city slickers what silence sounds like.”
Static cut him off again, then the sound of tapping poured through the speakers. “Can you hear me now?”
The spectators nodded and murmured agreement.
“I recommend anyone interested in a true Texas experience call the 800 number listed in the program and on the sign in the arena. She's taking reservations and they're going fast, folks.”
Tears filled her eyes as Taylor walked quickly away from the spotlighted arena. The last thing she wanted to do was cry in public. Mitch had gone above and beyond the letter and spirit of their agreement. He'd gotten a story in the newspapers and publicly promoted
her business. Somehow, this hurt more than his rejection a decade ago. She couldn't hide behind her anger. She had no resentment to coat her feelings and protect her. A sweet and considerate Mitch Rafferty hurt her most of all. Because she loved him and he would never return it.
As she brushed moisture from her cheeks, she almost didn't hear the female voice call to her.
“Taylor?”
She stopped and looked at her friend, Maggie Benson, a petite, redheaded bundle of energy with a riot of curls around her pretty face. Maggie leaned a slender shoulder against the post of her booth, which displayed the official rodeo T-shirts in white and reddish brown, a shade that reminded her of the color of Texas dirt. On the front of the shirts was the logo of the high school rodeo association. The back spelled out the names of all the teenage competitors.
Hanging on the wooden booth walls were denim jackets embroidered with horses, an outline of the state of Texas and other Western scenes. Adorned with sequins and beads, the shirts, hats and purses were like works of art. And all in good taste. Which was why word-of-mouth had spread and Maggie's shop was so successful.
Taylor hoped the same thing would happen with her dude ranch business. Thanks to Mitch, she had the start she'd hoped for. If only she'd been able to keep herself from falling in love with him.
“How's it going?” Maggie asked her.
“How's it going with you?”
Taylor turned the question back on her friend. She didn't want to talk about it and she wouldn't lie and say everything was fine. This was the last night of
championships and when the event was over Mitch would leave. Or he would stay because of Jensen.
Either way, her heart would be the worse for wear.
Apparently she wasn't the only one with things on her mind. Taylor realized that Maggie hadn't answered her question. And she was no longer casually leaning against the booth post.
“Everything okay, Mags?” she asked.
Maggie was frowning into the distance. “Those girls,” she said, huffing out an exasperated breath.
“What's Faith up to?”
“It's not just my daughter. She's with Kasey and Stacy O'Connor and the three of them put together don't have the good sense God gave a grasshopper. Although they flit hither and yon like one. Those three manage to get into all kinds of trouble. What one doesn't think of, another one will.”
“Yeah, but they have a good time together,” Taylor said.
“Too good,” the other woman said grimly.
“Where are they?” Taylor asked, scanning the crowd. “Do you see them?”
“Oh, yeah. I promised Grady I would keep an eye on his twins since they're always with Faith. The girls have strict orders to stay in sight of this booth or suffer dire consequences.”
“And what would those be?” Taylor asked, raising one eyebrow.
Maggie smiled. “I hope we don't ever have to find out.
“You don't have anything in mind, do you?”
She shook her head and red curls danced around her face. “I just hoped the words âdire consequences'
would scare the bejeezus out of them enough to keep the gruesome threesome in line.”
“What are they doing?” Taylor asked, searching the crowd again.
“First your sister bought them cotton candy, licorice and soda. Now she's doing a French braid for one of the twinsâI can never tell those two girls apart.”
“Yeah, that sounds like Jen. She likes kids.”
“They seem to like her, too. But you'd think someone as smart as she is would know better than to feed them so much sugar.”
“When it comes to kids, I don't think book smarts counts,” Taylor commented.
“I'm going to have to peel my child off the ceiling tonight. I don't even want to think about what will happen at Grady's house. Double trouble,” she said, shaking her head. “I wonder if he can arrest her for contributing to the hyperactivity of a minor.”
“I hope not. Jen wouldn't do well in jail,” Taylor said wryly. “Unless she could defend herself with words. At least her mouth is a match for her big heart.”
With a lot of love stored up, Taylor added silently. And she wasn't thinking about the girls. Mitch Rafferty would be on the receiving end of all that tucked-away love.
She'd heard her sister talking to him late into the night the previous evening. The murmur of their voices out by the pool had carried to her in her downstairs bedroom. Then they'd gone up to their rooms, separated by a bathroom that she knew firsthand wasn't big enough to discourage any hanky-panky from a determined man.
In the past few days, she hadn't seen much of that determined man. Her guests had kept her hopping. Ro
deo activities in addition to her sister had kept him busy. It was clear to Taylor that the two were an item again. And every time Taylor remembered seeing Jen in Mitch's arms, the wave of pain that roared through her stole her breath.
“I can tell from here that Kasey and Stacy are gaga over her.” Suddenly Maggie frowned and her whole body tensed.
“What's wrong?”
“That man stopped to talk to the girls.”
“Anyone you know?”
“Never saw him before,” Maggie said, the words clipped and uneasy.
“Is that a problem?”
“I don't know. He caught my eye earlier tonight. Just now he deliberately walked over to them.”
“Where?” Taylor asked.
“Third row of the bleachers,” Maggie answered pointing. “Just to the right of the Vern's Tractor Company sign on the pipe fencing. And to the left of Gunderson's Pet and Feed Center.”
“I still don't see them.”
“They're almost right smack dab behind your banner advertising the Stevens's dude ranch.”
Taylor nodded. “Okay. I've got them. I just spotted Faith's dark, curly head pop up.”
“Little squirt can't hold still for a microsecond. And all that sugar doesn't help.” Worry sanded the edges of her voice.
“Okay.” Taylor bobbed and weaved, trying to see. “There. He just turned around. I don't recognize him, either.”
“Between the two of us, we know everyone in these parts. I don't like it.”
“He's probably just hitting on Jen. She can handle him. And if she can't, Mitch will.”
“I guess. But I still don't like it. If he doesn't mosey off and mind his own business, I'm fixin' to be on him like sequins on an evening gown.” Maggie started to open the door to her booth.
“Down, girl.” Taylor saw Grady walk up the three bleacher steps toward the group. “I think reinforcements are on the way,” she said.
Maggie nodded. “That stranger saw, too. Did you see how fast he took off when he noticed the sheriff moving in?”
When Taylor's gaze slid from Grady back to Jensen and the girls, she realized that the man had disappeared into the crowd. She couldn't see him anymore. “He's gone. Good.”
“Triple that for me.” Maggie let out a long breath as Grady sat down with the female foursome. “All right. He's settling in for his shift to keep them under surveillance.”
“He probably has time now. There are only a few events left after intermission.”
“I'm glad he's there.” She shook her head as she scanned the crowd, a worried expression on her freckled face. “There was something weird about that guy. In fact, there's something weird about the rodeo this year.”
“What do you mean?”
“Don't you feel it? Sort of déjà vu? As if the past is catching up?”
Taylor
had
felt it. She and Mitch had talked about it. Still she asked, “Why do you say that?”
Maggie brushed the curls away from her small face and tucked them behind her ears. “Since I agreed to
sell the rodeo T-shirts along with my own stock, I've been able to sit here and watch the crowd.”
“So?” But Taylor heard the nerves in her friend's tone.
“I feel as if I'm seeing faces from the past.”
“Like who?”
“Jack Riley.”
“Jack's here?” Taylor asked.
“No.” The other woman vehemently shook her head as if sheer force of will could keep that from being so. “I'm sure it wasn't him. But it's as if Mitch coming back has made us all think about ten years ago.” A troubled expression pulled her eyebrows together and puckered her forehead. “Go ahead, tell me I'm crazy.”
“Certifiable,” Taylor said, struggling to keep from grinning. “Any minute eerie stalker music will come over the PA system. Can the resident slasher be far behind? Watch your back, Mags.”
The other woman held up her hand and a sheepish smile turned up the corners of her mouth. “Okay. I get the point. But tell me you haven't looked at people in a crowd and spotted someone who was a dead ringer for a person you know. Only it wasn't them.”
“Never happened to me,” Taylor said, shaking her head.
“Okay. Be that way. But I've had that feeling tonight. I keep seeing this guy.”
“You mean the one talking to the girls?”
Maggie shook her head. “Another guy. He's bigger and broader, more filled out, but he's got the same black hair and blue eyes as Jack Riley.”
“Couldn't just be wishful thinking? Did you have a crush on Jack that no one knew about?” Taylor suggested.
“No way,” Maggie said, flatly denying it. “My parents forbade me to see âwild' Jack. Do I have idiot written on my forehead?”
Taylor pretended to closely study her friend's small, heart-shaped face. “Nope. And even if it was, the curls would hide it.”
“Curls I passed on to my daughter,” her friend said, ruefully tucking her hair behind her ears again.
In spite of her close friendship with the other woman, Maggie had never named Faith's father, at least not to Taylor. But she knew if the man's name had passed Maggie's lips, it would be all over Destiny. The little girl had been conceived a decade ago, probably right around the championships. After all these years, Maggie and Faith were a package deal, a family. She'd come a long way from teenage mother to confident businesswoman who supported her daughter without help from anyone. Now it didn't really matter who had fathered Faith. But Taylor couldn't help being curious.