Crossing Lines (Cops and Docs #2) (17 page)

Nora gave her a small smile and stepped out of the doorway to let her in.

There were fireworks going off in Kelli’s head. Her emotions collided with each other to create all kinds of pretty colors. She was relieved and scared as shit, but a tentative excitement took the most space. Kelli walked into the living area and headed straight for the couch. She needed to sit down.

“Beer? I…uh stopped by Whole Foods on the way home.”

Nora was nervous. It was cute and a little confusing. “Sweetwater?”

“No…you finished the last one before…and I eventually got rid of the rest.”

What were the right words for it? Temporary conscious uncoupling? It wasn’t a breakup…not really, and it sure as hell wasn’t a vacation. “Yeah, okay.” Kelli cleared her throat. “What do you have?”

“Lagunitas Sucks.”

Kelli stared. “Who?”

“It’s the name of the beer.”

Kelli actually chuckled. “Sounds interesting.” She started to stand. “I can get it.”

“It’s on the table.” Nora pointed at the coffee table in front of them.

Goddamn. How the hell did she miss that? There was a whole fucking spread on the table. Probably because she was concentrating on the woman standing a few feet away from her. “Damn…yeah, okay.”

Nora sat down on the cushion next to her. Kelli reached for a beer and snatched her hand away the last second. “You’re wearing—”

“Your shirt again,” Nora said. “Yes, I am.”

Suddenly, Kelli was very thirsty. She grabbed the beer and guzzled it. It was still cold and very good. She felt Nora studying her the whole time. Kelli had a million questions. Instead of asking them, she waited. Their gazes met.

“Leaving…like I did was selfish. I should have stayed. We could have talked, but I didn’t trust that woman. I couldn’t trust myself. She liked…
I
liked…giving in to you…drowning in you.”

Kelli swallowed. “You trust her now?”

“I am her.” Nora’s gaze was dark, intense. “I always have been. I just couldn’t accept it. I was invested in what we had, just not all the way. That’s why we—”

“Stop. I’d be the biggest asshole in creation if I let you sit here and take all the blame. I fucked up, Nora. I knew what I was doing. I knew pushing you like that would affect you somehow, and I did it anyway. I didn’t think it would have this much of an impact. Obviously, I don’t know you as well as I thought I did. That didn’t stop me from being pissed. I don’t think I’ve ever been that angry at anybody.”

“Are you still?” Nora looked down at her lap and back up again.

“Shit…yeah. I’d be lying otherwise. I wanna understand… I mean I do, and it’s not just you. I’m angry at myself and just about everybody else. I’m fucking pissed all the time now.” Kelli sucked in a deep breath and found that the ache in her chest didn’t hurt as much as it usually did. She wanted to trust Nora. She just needed to give Kelli a reason to.

“Then…why did you come?”

“Because I don’t wanna be that way anymore. It’s exhausting, and it doesn’t make shit better. I’m not used to that. I don’t break things. I usually fix them.”

Nora stared at her for a long time. Kelli wanted to reach out to her. She wanted…hell…so many things. “I…wasn’t just something to fix, was I?”

“God no! How can you even ask me that? You were…
are
…perfect. I think I told you once or twice.”

“No, I’m not. We wouldn’t be in this situation otherwise.”

“Okay, yeah. Neither one of us would win any awards.”

“Obviously.” Nora reached for Kelli’s beer and took a swig. Her face scrunched up.

Kelli laughed. It was a moment of much needed levity. “You don’t like that one?”

“Not at all,” Nora answered. She sipped at a glass of wine instead.

“Can I try that?” Kelli asked. She wasn’t sure why.

Nora nodded. Their fingertips brushed during the transfer, resulting in a bolt of electricity that shot all the way down to the pit of Kelli’s stomach. Nora’s gaze darkened, and Kelli knew she felt it too. She hoped they always would.

Kelli peered at Nora over the rim of the wine glass as she drank. It was crisp and a little sweeter than usual.

“I don’t want this…us…to be over.”

Sputtering, Kelli dribbled the rest of the wine all down the front of her shirt, but that didn’t matter at all. “Yeah?” She set the glass back on the table.

“Yeah,” Nora answered. She smiled softly.

Kelli grinned right back. “Me either.” Her heart jumped into her throat when she felt Nora’s fingers skim over her hand before intertwining with her own. The embrace helped to solidify the moment, but Kelli wanted more. She needed more.

“Where do we go from here?” Nora asked. She stared at Kelli with those incredible eyes of hers. She looked sure and vulnerable at the same time.

Kelli wished she knew, but figuring it out together was the biggest fucking bonus ever. She scooted closer. Just one kiss. It felt like it had been forever. “I don’t know, but can I—”

“Yes, please.” Nora leaned forward, obliterating the final distance between them.

CHAPTER 11

For Kelli, life at this moment was a little odd. It was as if she was taking a deep breath after being under water for well over a month. Parts of her brain that had been fucked up were finally getting oxygen again, which helped her to realize she needed to clean up her mess sooner rather than later.

Was everything fixed between her and Nora? Hell no. Only two days had passed, but it was great to finally talk again. Although, Kelli wasn’t sure she would call it that since she had been stumbling over her words like a toddler. For the first time in a long while, she felt green as hell where women…well, this woman, was concerned. Kelli was new to this make up stuff, but she was done being on the outside looking in. Nora had made the first move, and now Kelli was working on making the second and third.

She covered her mouth as she yawned. Sooner or later, the whole lack of sleep thing was going to get to her. An extra hour wouldn’t hurt, but just the thought of her not being there when she was needed made any complaint feel like whining. Coffee. She needed coffee. Kelli searched her desk for her coffee cup, but it was missing. Annoyed, she glanced up only to see Williams coming her way with her coffee mug in hand.

“Here. Figured you needed this. I would have brought it earlier, but I was briefing the boss.”

Williams set the cup on her desk. The last time he’d started a conversation like this, Kelli had pretty much told him to go fuck himself. She gave him a little smile. “Thanks.”

One of his bushy eyebrows moved up slowly like a caterpillar. “Somebody must have laced this shit with something. You’ve been getting a little nicer every day.”

Kelli shrugged, but after everything she’d put him through, he deserved more than that. She was ready to give it to him. “Yeah, sorry. I’m trying.”

“I can tell. It’s a good thing, but maybe if you got more than a couple hours sleep—”

“That’s not happening. It’s not like I don’t trust those guys, but…”

“Some things you got to do for yourself.” Williams finished.

“Yeah, especially with this.”

He nodded. “We got a hit on the roommate’s credit card, by the way.” Williams smirked. “Guess you were right.”

“Mmm, I am sometimes. How do you know it was her?” Kelli was relieved and apprehensive at the same time. They were a step closer to catching Fuller, but that didn’t mean she wouldn’t try to make another surprise visit to Nora.

“Johns went to question Shelly again. He had a hunch she was still holding something back. The girl was a nervous wreck. She said Taylor swore she didn’t do it. Johns helped her to understand that Fuller used her bat and put it back. Her lightbulb came on. So, Shelly confessed to giving her money and one of her emergency credit cards.”

“You gonna charge her as an accessory?”

“Yeah, should have done that days ago. Good thing we waited. Now, we know Fuller’s still in town. We’re checking out the motels and shelters near the grocery store where she used the card.” Williams took a sip of his own coffee. “So, how’s Nora?”

“You asked me that already.” Kelli’s response was quick and a little defensive.

“That was a few days ago.” He pushed on.

Kelli shook off the prickliness and smirked. She knew firsthand, now, how Nora was doing. “She’s good.”

Williams drank from his mug, but his eyes narrowed as he looked down at her. Kelli knew her smirk gave it all away.

“Yes.” Kelli held his gaze.

“Huh? I didn’t say—”

“Oh, come off it. You were about to.” Or maybe she just wanted to share. It made this whole thing with Nora more real.

Williams chuckled and looked down in his cup. “There must
really
be something in this to loosen up your tongue that much.”

Kelli glared at him. “Get the fuck away from my desk.” Her tone was playful.

He laughed. “There’s some parts of you she obviously won’t be able to mellow out.”

Kelli shot him the finger.

That didn’t help. He laughed even harder.

* * *

Kelli had finished her first cup of coffee a long time ago and had gone back several times already. Williams had been the easy one. Sean was going to be another story altogether. She picked up her cell phone and highlighted Sean’s number. It rang twice before she got the voice mail. Kelli didn’t give up. She typed out a text.

At least u haven’t blocked me. I’m tryin to get my shit 2gether.

Been an ahole to u. I wanna fix it.

She stared at her phone for a few minutes, but there was no answer.

“Shit.” She threw her cell back on her desk.

Kelli couldn’t just sit there. She checked her watch. It was almost lunch time. Perfect. She took a deep breath and stood. Sean was probably at the deli or on his way there.

She got there in record time. Kelli saw him sitting at his usual table. It was now or… No, it was now. The bell jangled above the door as she opened it. Their mother looked up, grinned, and waved, but continued to help a customer. Sean ignored her completely.

He didn’t acknowledge her until Kelli was standing next to his table. His gaze was wary. He had every right to be.

Kelli gestured toward the empty seat in front of him. “It’s okay if I sit here?”

He shrugged and glanced away. “It’s a free country. You usually do what you want.”

Kelli ignored the sting his words caused and sat anyway. She couldn’t tiptoe around this. She had to be direct as hell. “Sean? Can you look at me?”

He sighed. “I don’t know if I want to. What’s the point?”

“Because, I’m asking you to? I’m not telling. I’m asking.”

He didn’t respond for a few seconds, but eventually he met her gaze again.

“I don’t have any excuses. I’ve been the biggest asshole toward you—”

Sean snorted. “That doesn’t even cover it.”

“You know a stronger word for it?”

He shrugged again.

“You didn’t deserve it. I didn’t have a problem stirring all this shit, but I gotta clean it up. So, I’m sorry. You’re my brother. You’ve done so much. I didn’t mean to make you feel like it didn’t matter. It does.”

His eyes softened, but they hardened again almost immediately. “Yeah, thanks. We done here?” Sean stood. “I need to go.”

Kelli nodded and watched as he threw away his trash. Well, fuck. Two out of three wasn’t bad. Kelli went over the conversation in her head. Was there something more she could have said? Maybe. Then again, maybe not. It was up to him now.

* * *

“Ten blade.” Nora glanced at Patricia and held out her hand.

“Just a sec. I forgot to put the music on repeat,” she said instead.

“You’d have to scrub in again. You don’t have to—” Nora didn’t get to finish. Patricia waved her words away.

“True, but I actually like this album.” Patricia’s eyes danced, as she handed Nora the scalpel she requested.

Nora decided to go along with the playfulness. She was in a strange mood. “Are you inferring that my musical choices in the past were lacking?”

“Why, yes, I am. Plus, who doesn’t love Coltrane?”

Two members of the surgical team raised their hands. The resident present looked completely lost in the banter. He was new, and for his sake, she hoped he wasn’t this meek during surgery.

“Well that wasn’t the point at all,” Patricia grumbled.

“I agree. Let’s get started,” Nora said.

Nora’s team operated just as smoothly as it always had. The only difference was the lightheartedness that was now part of the atmosphere. Nora enjoyed this new dynamic, immensely.

“Suction.” Nora requested, after making an incision into the patient’s abdomen and exposing her peritoneum.

Patricia was there immediately. “Sooo…” She dragged the word out. “Did you hear about Mary?”

“I’m standing right here,” Mary said.

“Yeah, I see you. What’s your point?” Patricia continued to focus on the patient, as she carried on the conversation. Nora appreciated that skill.

“That was the point. If you wanted to talk about me, why didn’t you do it a few days ago when I wasn’t here?” Mary glanced at Patricia. A second later, her eyes were back on the monitors.

Patricia tsked. “I like doing it to your face.”

“Did you find a good therapist?” Nora asked. This wasn’t going to be a long surgery. She’d already found the bleed near the patient’s spleen.

“I hope so. Looked on Angie’s List. We were able to get an appointment for next week.” Mary paused. “What about you?”

Nora looked up. “What do you mean?”

Patricia chuckled. “Since we’re talking about people to their faces, how’s that soap opera of a life you’re living? Isn’t that what you meant to say, Mar?”

“Something like that,” Mary agreed with a nod. “How are you doing? I know I’ve asked that like fifty times this week.”

“I’m okay.” She was actually doing a lot better than that, despite the ever-present threat from Taylor. Although, she was beginning to question the amount of danger she was actually in. Nora wanted to trust Kelli’s instincts, but Taylor had been so quiet. Maybe the police detail was no longer necessary. “Irrigate the site for me,” she said, and the resident, Dr. Pierce, did so quietly.