Crossing Oceans (25 page)

This realization was bittersweet. How much time had I wasted loving a man who wasn’t worthy of my love? Had I let David go when I should have, might I have opened my heart to Craig when there was still time to do something about it? The suds from the counter glided slowly down the cabinet.

Rather than brood about my emotional retardation or allow myself to relive a past that no longer mattered, I forced myself back to the living room and leaned against the wall.

David and Lindsey held hands on the couch while Mama Peg rested in her recliner, feet up, eyes closed, wearing a hint of a smile. In her own world, Isabella played solitary Barbie on the rug. If Norman Rockwell had captured the scene before my eyes, viewers would assume this to be a happy, all-American family. Sometimes a picture was worth a thousand lies.

Isabella held a half-dressed Barbie in one hand and a gown-clad Barbie in the other as she mumbled a conversation that only she could hear. Her back remained to the group. I wasn’t sure if I should force her to interact with David and Lindsey or if it would do more damage than good.

David let go of Lindsey’s hand, leaned forward, and glared at me. “We don’t need you to supervise.”

Lindsey jerked her head toward him. “David!”

I let his hurled stone clank impotently against my heart’s new armor. Although his words could no longer hurt me as they’d done in the past, they still had sufficient power to tick me off. “This is my house, right? I mean, I do live here and you are a guest?”

His gaze slithered down me. “Oh? I hadn’t realized you purchased your father’s residence.”

I shook my head in awe of his pompousness. “Must you always show your—”

Mama Peg threw down the
TV Guide
. It skidded across the end table onto the floor. “You’ve got to be kidding me! After all you two just went through.” She thrust her arm out, pointing in Isabella’s direction. “After all that little girl almost lost and will lose. Are you really going to make her listen to her parents behave like Neanderthals?” Her gaze moved from me to David. “Really?”

I looked at Isabella. She’d stopped playing and was watching the exchange with eyes so sad. Hot shame filled me.

Mama Peg pulled up the lever on the side of her chair, lowering her legs in one quick motion. “I can’t bear to watch you fools. I’m taking a nap.” With great effort, she pushed herself up from the chair and grabbed the handle of her oxygen tank. “If I’m lucky, maybe I’ll dream about a family that isn’t a bunch of selfish ninnies.”

I watched her walk away, her disapproval lingering in the air. No one made a sound until her bedroom door clicked shut.

Lindsey pushed off the couch and made her way to Isabella. “I used to love to play Barbies.”

Of course she did,
I thought. Little prima donna probably never climbed a tree in her whole life or touched a frog . . . unless you counted David.

David glowered at me. “Something funny?”

Still wearing my smirk, I shook my head.

Lindsey’s sleek hair fell into her face as she knelt beside Isabella. She tucked it behind her ears, picked up a spare Barbie, and proceeded to make the doll do cartwheels. Isabella paused as she watched the gymnastics routine from the corner of her eye.

Someone touched my arm. I turned to find Craig in the doorway, motioning toward the kitchen. I followed him.

“What’s up?” I asked.

He tucked his fingertips into the pockets of the jeans he’d changed into. “Why don’t we get out of here for a little while and give them some privacy?”

I looked back to the doorway. “Isabella would freak if I tried to leave.”

He scratched at his Adam’s apple. “Maybe, but she’d get over it quick enough. I’ve got something I want to show you.”

I smiled. “As long as it doesn’t come in a little black box.”

He didn’t smile back. “I’m serious, Jenny. I have a surprise for you.”

The thought of him proposing again sent a thrill of excitement up my spine. As flattering as his advances were, though, they were equally draining. I didn’t think I could keep telling him no. With the ever-growing affection I felt for him, eventually I’d cave and further complicate an already-complicated situation. Besides, I was certain that Isabella would throw the world’s biggest hissy fit if I left her with David. “Another time, okay? She gets so worried when I’m away from her.”

“
She
gets that way?”

I opened my mouth to defend myself, but his puckered lips stole my retort.

His kiss sent a current more powerful than a bolt of lightning through me. Speechless, I touched my lips and looked at him.

“Did that change your mind?” he asked, looking pleased with himself.

When I shook my head, disappointment dulled his eyes. I hated that my answer always seemed to be no, but as much as he wanted my company, Isabella needed me more. “I’m sorry, Craig. She’s just not ready.” I gave his arm an affectionate squeeze and made my way back to the living room.

I laid a hand over my mouth to keep from gasping at what I saw there. Isabella now sat on Lindsey’s lap while David lay on his side next to them. Isabella lifted a one-armed Ken doll from her case and held it just out of his reach. “Are you
really
sorry, Daddy?”

From where I stood, I couldn’t see his expression, but whatever it was, it sent her into a giggling fit. She handed him the doll. The jealousy I felt was not far from what I felt watching David show affection to Lindsey. I knew it was wrong, but still I couldn’t deny it.

I turned around and found myself nose to nose with Craig. His warm breath fell on my skin as he said, “I think they’ll be okay without you.”

Chapter Thirty

Gray and gloomy, the afternoon sky couldn’t have mirrored my mood any better. As Craig drove, I looked upward, thinking of Isabella and feeling more than a little sorry for myself. The rain clouds that had been cloaking the sun slid away before more could move in to take their place. Like a captive set free, sunlight burst through the windshield and into my eyes. I held a hand over my face as I pulled down the visor.

Craig shifted into the next gear, sending my shoulders thrusting back against the bench seat while my insides lurched forward. I laid a hand on my middle as if the gesture had the power to settle my stomach.

He gave me a worried glance. “You okay? You look a little green.”

“Just a little.” I turned toward the open window and drew in a deep breath. The air was so humid, it felt like I was inhaling kettle steam. Sticky tresses clung to my damp skin. I pulled my hair into a mock ponytail to get some wind on my neck.

“You need me to pull over?” he asked.

Not wanting to upset him, I shook my head. I knew when the flat land turned into rolling hills and the stink of manure filled the air that we were approaching Lemley’s Dairy Farm. I winced and shut my window.

Craig did likewise, then turned on the AC. A Christmas tree air freshener swayed from the rearview mirror. Its original green color had long since faded to an ugly yellow.

I lifted it and brought it to my nose, hoping to counter the stench of dung. It smelled like old cardboard instead of pine. “Why do you keep this?”

He squinted as if seeing it for the first time. “Decoration?”

I raised an eyebrow.

“Actually, I didn’t even know I had that thing. Probably came with the truck.”

More amused than annoyed, I shook my head. “You might want to work on your powers of observation there, Sherlock.” I stared out the window and watched grazing cows blur by. My feet vibrated against the floor, jostling my thin legs with the road’s every bump and crater.

Craig tapped my shoulder with his fist. “My powers of observation might not set the world on fire, Miss Lucas, but there’s something to be said for having the ability to filter out things that don’t much matter.”

My head felt heavy and I leaned it against the window. The trembling glass rattled my skull. Not relishing the thought of a migraine, I picked my head back up. “Maybe so, but you might find the ability to notice minute details comes in handy if you ever get married.”

He took his eyes off the road for a split second to question me with a glance. “How so?”

I straightened a kink in my seat belt. “Your wife comes home from the salon after having her hair highlighted. Now she’s standing in front of you, all expectation and smiles, asking if you notice anything different about her.”

Craig made a face. “She wouldn’t expect me to notice a few blonde streaks in her hair.”

“Of course she would,” I said. “Or if she had her eyebrows waxed, lost five pounds, or—”

“
Five
pounds? Oh, c’mon. That’s like asking a woman to notice a new pack of drill bits in my toolbox.”

“If she looked—” I breathed a puff of hot air onto the window and drew a heart with my finger—“she would probably notice.” The fog on the glass dissipated, taking the heart with it.

Neither of us spoke for the next mile or so until Craig broke the silence. “
You
wouldn’t expect me to notice those things, would you?”

I thought for a second. “I wouldn’t
expect
you to, but what can I say? I’m a woman. I’d
like
you to.”

He started throwing troubled glances at my hair.

“It’s okay, Craig. It’s not highlighted.”

“Of course not.” He grinned at me. “I would have noticed.”

“No doubt in my mind.” The air-conditioning began to make me feel like the abominable snow woman. I reached over and turned it down. “Is this why you had me dress warm?”

He stared straight ahead at the road. “Nope.”

“Where are we going?”

“For the last time, you’ll see when we get there.”

“I need to know when I’ll be getting back to my daughter. She needs—”

“She needs you to stop worrying. She’ll be just fine. Lindsey told you that. I told you that. Even Isabella told you that. You’ll be home before Ken kisses Barbie good night.”

“Tell me where we’re going.”

“No.”

“Tell me.”

“Stop it.”

“Please?”

“You need to learn to take no for an answer.”

I huffed and crossed my arms.

He brushed my cheek with the back of his hand. “C’mon, Jenny. It won’t be a surprise if I tell you.”

“I hate surprises.”

“Too bad, so sad.”

“How about a hint?”

He grunted. “Okay, one hint. About a year after you left, someone discovered something very special in a neighboring town.”

“What town?” I asked.

“I’ve said enough.”

“Fossils?”

Craig scrunched his face at the road. “I’m not saying another word to you until we get there.” And for almost an hour, he didn’t.

Slowing the truck, he pulled onto the shoulder of the road and shifted into park. He reached under the seat, pulled out a striped tie, and held it before me. “We’re almost there. I need you to put this on.”

I looked at the tie and again at him. “What kind of place requires a woman to wear a tie?”

He held it up, leaned toward me, and laid it flat across my eyes. The silky fabric felt cool against my skin. His fingers brushed against my ear sending tingles down my neck, and excitement welled up inside me.

Once, when it my mother’s birthday, my father had tied a blindfold over her eyes and led her from the house. Watching from the window, I squealed in delight as Mom’s dress swished about her legs and my father grinned bigger than I’d ever seen him. I used to dream that one day David would do the same for me.

“Keep that on until I tell you, okay?” Craig said.

I could technically keep it on and still sneak a peek, right? “Okay.”

“And no peeking.”

I said nothing.

“Jenny, no peeking. Promise?”

I had hoped he’d interpret my silence as concession.

He didn’t. “Jenny?”

I tucked in my lips and turned away.

His voice grew stern. “Genevieve Paige Lucas?”

Touched at his use of my full name, I turned toward him. “You know my middle name.”

“Don’t change the subject. Promise me.”

At last I grunted in defeat. “Okay, already. I promise.”

I felt the truck move again, and soon we made a right onto a surface smoother than the battered road we’d ridden in on.

“We’re here,” he said. “Remember, no peeking.”

I felt for my seat buckle and unlatched it. His door slammed shut. I heard mine open and a wall of humidity met me.

Craig’s hand grasped mine. “I’ve got you, baby. Come on out.”

My heart fluttered at the endearment. I’d always wanted to be someone’s baby. David had called me that once, but his halfhearted utterance rang flat and foreign. From Craig’s sweet lips, however, it sounded as right as rain.

I climbed out of the truck and let Craig guide me by the elbow. It felt odd and a little disconcerting to be blindly led to a destination I couldn’t even guess. I trusted Craig, of course, but still my stomach was a mosh pit of butterflies. Each blind step I took was heavy with uncertainty. He led me through what must have been a parking lot. We paused and a door creaked open. I felt my way through it, fingertips grazing wood as I stepped inside.

The heat of the outdoors was superseded by cold dankness. The place smelled of earth and mildew. “How many?” a woman asked. Her voice was soft and shaky. I guessed her to be a slight woman in her sixties.

“Just us,” Craig replied. He must have received a questioning look because he added, “I’m surprising her.”

“Well, now, ain’t she just the prettiest little thing you ever saw?” Her question sounded more like an accusation than a compliment.

“She sure is,” Craig said. I could hear the smile in his voice.

“Is it her birthday?” she asked.

I was beginning to feel like a nonperson standing there, being spoken about instead of to, as though I weren’t just blindfolded but deaf as well. “Not my birthday,” I said. “He just likes to be dramatic.”

She laughed. “Men are like that, darlin’. They like to accuse us women of being drama queens, but you just have to see a grown man sick once to know that’s the pot calling the kettle black.” She paused. “That’ll be twenty even.”