Crumbling Walls (Jack and Emily #1) (14 page)

▪▪▪

Dinner was a veritable feast. Food spread for miles across the table and carried over onto the kitchen counter. Emily had honestly never seen so much food in one place before except at the restaurant, but then, a spread of rice, bean sprouts, Sweet and Sour chicken and Moo Shu pork definitely did not hold the appeal that this table did.

Given her stomach had been emptied hours earlier, she was starving and kept pace with the rest of the boys until after she’d cleaned the plate a second time. Finally sitting back, “That’s it. I just can’t seem to get past the second plate.”

Jack nudged her as he helped himself to yet another spoonful of cranberries, “You’ve gotta train for these kinds of things.”

Elizabeth leaned over and patted her arm, “It’s okay honey. I’ve been with them for years and I've never been able to keep up.”

Exchanging a smile, Emily studied the rest of the table while at least three different conversations went on around her. It was only then that she realized Jack’s dad was watching just like she was, smiling at his wife, helping his youngest cut his food, handing a dropped napkin to someone else. She watched him longer than she thought she could, but the panicked flutter that usually overtook her was barely registering.

That is, until he locked eyes with her, then she felt the wave rush through her, but also, for the first time, she didn’t look away. She held the gaze and, swallowing hard, nodded at him.

He gave her barely a nod back, then expertly caught Tucker’s glass before it spilled. But as he was doing it, she saw the barest hint of relief cross his face. She also had the sudden and passing thought that he might just understand what was in her head.

Chapter 11

After food and talking and laughing and several heated battles of Monopoly and Phase-10, Emily realized it was getting late and leaned over to Jack as he shuffled the cards, “I should probably get going. It’s dark already.”

He immediately handed the deck to Tim and stood, “All right. I’ll get a bag for your stuff, then I’ll drive you home.”

Emily and everyone else stood and, after saying a multitude of thank-yous and good-byes, Elizabeth handed her a bag of leftovers, “Thank you for all your help today. We loved having you.”

Elizabeth looked as if she were about to hug her, so Emily quickly reached for the food instead, “I loved being here.”

Jack gave her her things then expertly wrapped her now dry, fat scarf securely around her neck. Once they were all bundled up, he opened the door, a blast of cold air and driving snow blowing into the house. Stepping onto the porch and pulling the door shut behind them, Jack looked around. The blizzard that they hadn’t really been paying much attention to all day had apparently decided to dump a foot of snow on the city. The drifts were even higher and Jack could barely make out the cars sitting in the driveway five feet away, let alone the road they were supposed to drive on.

Muttering a 'son of a shit' to himself, Jack turned to her and, yelling through the whistling wind, “Feel like spending the night?” The cold had already set her teeth chattering, so she only nodded. Noticing the answer, he turned around and opened the door again.

No one had expected them to return so they were met with seven pairs of eyes staring in curiosity. After Jack had pulled his hat and scarf off, “Yeah, has anybody actually looked outside since we came in from playing?”

The younger boys immediately made a beeline for the windows and pulling back the drapes, “Oh wow!”

This brought the rest of them to look, “Dang.”

“Yeah, I said something worse, but it’s all the same in the end so, um, if it’s okay, I thought maybe Emily could just stay here tonight?”

Elizabeth turned back toward Emily, “That’s fine. Just call your mom and let her know where you are. I imagine she’s not leaving the hospital any time soon anyway.”

Emily nodded, “I will. Thanks.”

After Emily went upstairs and pretended to get things squared away, she came down and joined back in the game playing, which lasted until around eight, when the traditional viewing of “A Christmas Story” took place.

By the time that was over, Sam was asleep, Tucker and Nate were nodding off and Dave looked completely unfocused and glassy-eyed. Will stood and announced, “All right. Time for bed guys. Come on.”

Picking up Sam, the other three boys followed him upstairs, leaving Elizabeth to direct the rest, “Okay. Emily, the only spare bed we have is the couch but it’s a really comfortable couch, if that’s okay?”

With a nod, “That’s perfect.”

“Then Tim, if you could go find one of the extra comforters from the closet and a sheet to put on the cushions, that’d be great.”

Tim was already standing, “Back in a flash.”

Turning to Jack, “Then if you could find some pajamas for her and grab the extra pillow from your bed, we’ll be all set.”

With a silly grin, he raced upstairs after Tim and Elizabeth turned back to Emily, “The boys’ll probably stay up for awhile but you have my permission to kick them out whenever you get tired.”

Nodding, “Thank you for the couch and everything else today.”

“Honey, you are more than welcome.”

Emily set about cleaning up a little while she waited for the boys to return with their assignments. Once they did and after tucking in the sheet and unrolling the comforter, Emily changed in the bathroom.

She returned to the living room sporting a pair of blue plaid flannel pajama pants, the string tied tight because they were Jack’s clothes once again. She was also swimming in the thermal shirt he’d given her as well, but she was warm and cozy and everything smelled like Jack, which she hadn’t realized, until now, she really enjoyed.

Elizabeth said good-night to the three of them when Will came down a minute later, then they both returned upstairs.

Turning to Emily and Jack, Tim asked, “So, anyone up for a little three handed Euchre?”

And so they sat up until after midnight, teaching Emily the finer points of the card game, then proceeded to have the pants beat off of them by her. Tim, gracefully losing his third hand in a row, “Damn, does everyone in your family play like you ‘cause I’m thinking of taking you to Vegas.”

Emily shrugged in his direction, “Couldn’t tell you. All I know is I’m having a lot of fun.”

“Of course you are. You’re winning.” Still grinning at her, he dealt the next hand, “But I can feel the streak about to end.”

And end it did, but only because Tim began yawning every few seconds and finally threw in the towel. “All right folks, I’m going to bed.”

Emily was glad he gave up first because she was sleepy as well. She just didn’t want to say anything.

Both boys said goodnight and left her in the quiet of the living room, the only sounds being the refrigerator humming in the next room and the snow and ice hitting the glass of the windows. Moving the doorwall curtain aside, she stood for a few minutes watching the snow swirl around the back porch before lying down, snuggling beneath the thick comforter she'd been given for the night.

Warm and toasty, she fell asleep easily, the smell of evergreen and Christmas dinner still permeating the house and making her feel, for the first time, like she was actually home.

▪▪▪

Jack and Tim lay in the darkness upstairs for a few minutes, “Tim?”

“Yeah?”

“Do you love Sarah?”

Without hesitation, “Yeah.”

“But are you in love with her?”

Still not hesitating, “Oh yeah. Have been since the day I saw her on the steps at school.”

“Have you told her?”

“I told her on our second date. Didn’t think there was any point in waiting.”

Jack propped himself on his elbows and looked at him in surprise, “Your second date?”

“Sure.”

“What’d she do?”

“She laughed at me, then kissed me.” Turning the tables, he asked the same thing, “Do you love Em?”

“A lot.”

“Have you told her?”

Thinking for a minute, he grinned, “I think I’ll wait until our third date.”

Tim’s pillow hit him in the face, “You’ve known her for six or seven months, right? What's taking so long?”

Tossing it back to him, he smiled again and turned over, “We’re taking it slow.”

“Damn, any slower and you’ll be going backwards.”

“G’night Tim.”

Rolling over himself, “Night Jack.”

- 108 -

PART 2

Chapter 12

Will, cursing his internal clock the whole way downstairs, couldn’t believe he’d woken up at 5:15 a.m. … who the hell wakes up at 5:15 on what he knew would be a snow day from work.

You’d think his mind would understand this and keep him asleep but no, his eyes popped open at exactly 5:15.

So here he was, wide awake and needing to use the bathroom. Sliding silently from next to his wife, he finished his business and then decided he might as well wander himself downstairs for a cup of tea and maybe the early news on TV.

Creeping down the stairs and into the kitchen, he heard a noise. It wasn’t a loud noise, but it was not a usual early morning house sound. Stopping by the sink to listen, he realized someone was whimpering and moving around in the living room.

Taking a second, he suddenly remembered that Emily had slept on the couch. Peering around the corner of the wall, he saw her thrashing about, tossing and turning on the couch, a low, guttural crying sound coming from her throat. Thinking she had to be having a nightmare, Will came over in front of her and caught her hand before it knocked into him. If only he knew he was mirroring his son’s actions from a week ago.

▪▪▪

He was there again. He was there again and she begged and pleaded for him to leave her alone. She fought him, she swung at him, she yelled for help, but as usual, none came.

He wouldn’t move, she couldn’t breathe, she couldn’t see, there was no sound save the pounding of blood in her ears.

He grabbed her wrist and pushing with all her might out of the nightmare, she opened her eyes …

… and he was still there …

… and she threw up …

▪▪▪

Will wasn’t even phased by suddenly being covered in projectile vomit because he knew, the instant she opened her eyes …

… he saw her world …

“Emily! Emily, it’s Will. It’s not who you think it is. I’m not him. I swear to you. I’m Jack’s dad. Remember, you spent Christmas with us. It was snowing too hard for you to go home, so you slept on the couch. Emily!” He had her by the shoulders at this point, trying to make her see him for who he actually was, “Emily!”

And suddenly her eyes cleared, letting her focus in on him, “You’re not him?”

Luckily he had had his robe on and most of the vomit had hit that, so pulling it off and tossing it in a heap onto the kitchen floor, he pulled her into a hug, “No, I’m not him.” With that, she clung to him and began to sob uncontrollably into his shirt.

Doing the only thing possible at this point, he held her close and stroked her hair, rocking her back and forth as if she were any one of his children. Quieting eventually, she sat back slightly, only realizing then that he had been kneeling in front of her the whole time. Saying the first and only thing that popped in her head, “Your knees must be killing you.”

He had to laugh at this, “They’re fine. Promise.”

Waves of embarrassment were rolling over her and, as she dropped her head in shame, he tilted it back up with a finger under her chin, “Don’t be ashamed.”

New tears made her eyes swim, “How can I not be?”

After taking a deep breath and holding it a second, “Because I spent years feeling embarrassed and ashamed and angry and scared and I realized that in the end, it wasn’t my fault.”

She stared at him for the longest time before she whispered, “I’m sorry.”

“There’s nothing to apologize for.” Smiling at her, “You’re safe here. And I promise, I’m not anything like him.”

“But you don’t know what he was like.”

Silently, he turned around and pulled his shirt up to reveal the perfect outline of an iron burned into the middle of his back along with several other only slightly faded scars, “I know exactly what he was like.” Sitting back on the beat-up coffee table, he leaned forward, elbows on knees, and studied her, “Does Jack know?”

“No.”

“Okay. Then I’ll keep a lid on this, all right?”

With a nod, she had to ask, “Do they know about you?”

“My wife does and so do Tim and Jack, but the rest of the kids don’t.” With a regretful smile, “I don’t think any of them have really seen me without my shirt on.”

“So, we’ve both got our secrets, huh?”

Tilting his head to one side, “Something tells me you’ve got more secrets in there than I can possibly imagine.”

Her face crumpled for a second before straightening back out, “I wish I didn’t.”

Still looking at her intently, “Can I ask you something?”

Shrugging lightly, “Sure. You deserve at least one question after being on the receiving end of my stomach contents.”

“Do I look like him? Is that why I scare you?”

“Yeah.” Ducking her head and fiddling with the fringed edge of the afghan, “He had a mustache like you and his hair was a bit longer, like yours.” Opening her mouth, she opted to chew her lip for a second before, “I know you’re not him, but …”

“S’okay. I know.” Reaching out, he patted her on the knee before standing up, “Well, how about you go change and give me the clothes and I’ll throw everything in the wash before anybody gets up?”

With a rueful smile, “I did kind of make a mess, didn’t I?”

“There’re six kids in this house. Believe me, I’ve been covered in worse.”