Cut & Run 05 - Armed & Dangerous (25 page)

“That’s… ridiculously romantic.”
Ty laughed. “Don’t sound so surprised.”
Zane nipped at Ty’s bottom lip to stop the laugh. “I’m not.” Ty reached up to kiss him again, slow and careful. “Better let me
up,” he finally said with real regret.
Zane’s fingers tightened on his arms for a moment before relaxing
and releasing him. “For now,” Zane allowed before climbing off him. Ty lay there for a moment, still recovering. Then he sat up and
swung his legs over the side of the bed, fighting down the lightheadedness that he knew would come after mind-blowing sex. “Back in
a minute,” he said, and he headed for the door to the bathroom on
unsteady legs.
He felt pretty confident in letting Julian and Cameron stay on
their own for the night. After the noise he and Zane had made, the other
two men could have no doubt what they’d been up to, and they were
smart enough not to bother Ty and Zane tonight.
Ty smiled to himself. That, or they had used the golden
opportunity to finally escape. At this point, he really didn’t care.

T HE soft click of the door brought Cameron out of his doze, and he opened sleepy eyes as the bed dipped on the other side. It was Julian, back from a patrol of the hotel, most likely. Cameron smiled. Julian’s protective instinct was one of his most endearing traits. He slid his hand out from under the pillow to reach for Julian’s. Julian’s cool fingers glided across his palm in the darkness. He felt Julian move, sliding himself into the bed with his usual careful movements.

Julian’s arms wrapped around him, pulling him closer. He sighed as he settled Cameron against his chest and rested his chin on top of Cameron’s head. It was the same contented sound he almost always made when he held Cameron to him. “I’m not sure. I’ve made several attempts to contact Preston, but he’s… simply gone.”

“Really?” Cameron woke up a little, though he nestled as close as he could get, inhaling Julian’s warm, spicy scent. “What does that mean?”

“I hope it means he’s smart and he’s cut and run before he can be dragged into this too.”
“You don’t really believe that, though.”
“No. Preston wouldn’t run. I have an awful feeling.”
Cameron wrapped around him with a frown, knowing there wasn’t much he could do to alleviate the worry or stress.
They hadn’t heard from the other room in a while, and Cameron found himself smiling as he thought about the two tough, acerbic FBI agents. “It’s so cute. They’re in love.”
“It’s like watching two kittens fight with machetes,” Julian muttered.
“Julian.”
“What? It’s weird!”
“No,it’s not. They’re perfect for each other. Poor Zane, though,” Cameron murmured. “In love with Ty Grady.” He couldn’t imagine how frustrating that would be. Then Julian inhaled, and Cameron chuckled slightly. Yeah, he could, actually. “Did I tell you that Ty cuddled Wesson when he was at the apartment?”
“He
cuddled
him?”
“He picked him up and cuddled him like a baby. I should have known right then that he was just as evil as you are.”
“Interesting. You mentioned he picked him up. And Wesson let him?”
“He purred.”
“Oh my God.”
“And then begged for more.”
“The little harlot.”
Cameron laughed, hiding his face against Julian’s shoulder.
“My opinion of them both has been slightly altered, I’m afraid,” Julian admitted. “Grady’s still a complete wanker, of course, but….”
Cameron blinked his eyes open and pulled back to see Julian’s face. “Why is that?”
“It’s twice as terrifying, working with someone you love. A mistake could cost you everything. It makes what they do that much more… impressive.”
“That’s what you do with me, sweetheart,” Cameron said gently.
Julian laughed. “No, I can trust you to be smart and stay out of trouble. You’re not… in the thick of things, usually.”
Cameron swatted at his chest.
“You are everything to me,” Julian whispered in his ear.
“You know you are impossible to resist,” Cameron said with a sniff, cuddling back into his arms. He sighed and added, “I think I must have loved you before you spoke a word to me.”
“All part of my charm.”
Cameron smiled and tipped his head back so he could kiss Julian’s jaw. “You’re so humble.”
“Which adds to my charm.”
“Hustler,” Cameron said as he reached up with one hand to tip Julian’s chin down toward him.
Julian kissed him hard suddenly, holding him tight and delving into the passionate kiss. Cameron inhaled through his nose but snaked one arm up and around Julian’s neck as he gave himself over. Julian could be disconcertingly tender, at odds with his demeanor and size, but he could also be demanding and rough, and Cameron loved it both ways.
Julian broke the kiss but didn’t loosen his hold on Cameron as he took a deep breath. “Have I told you lately how lucky I am to have you?”
“No,” Cameron answered as his chest began to ache. It did that around Julian an awful lot.
“I should tell you every day,” Julian whispered to him. “Seeing those two struggling to love each other and forced to hide it from the world….” He shook his head sorrowfully. “You’re everything to me, Cameron.”
Cameron smiled as his pulse sped. “I’m a lucky man. I love you, Julian. If I didn’t stop when you died on me, it’ll never change.”
Julian kissed him again, his long fingers spreading over Cameron’s back as he tightened his arms around him. Cameron sank into his embrace, pushing away any thoughts of danger or separation. They were together right now, and that was what was important.

Z ANE watched the sun go down and the room fill with darkness in the few minutes Ty was in the bathroom. He stretched on the bed, enjoying the slide of lube and come between his thighs. Muscle fatigue complemented by satiation lulled him into quiet thoughts as he waited for his lover to return. He tucked his arm behind his head and stared up at the ceiling as his mind wandered around reflections and memories of Ty—no big surprise there; that was where his mind almost always wandered.

The bathroom door creaked as Ty pushed it open, but that was all the noise he made as he crept through the darkness. Zane could barely see him, but the dim light picked up on his naked skin and the white towel he held in his hand.

It was always fun—and arousing—to watch Ty move, naked or not. He was like a wild cat, all lean, economic, smooth movement that was hypnotizing. He came closer to the bed, steps careful, eyes still adjusting to the darkness. He crawled up the bed and over Zane without a word, taking care not to rub against his sticky belly. He kissed him soundly before climbing off him and laying the towel on Zane’s chest.

Zane nodded and moved one hand to put the damp towel to use, but he kept his eyes on Ty. He just didn’t want to look away.
Ty shook his head, grinning so that Zane could see the white of his teeth. He shifted, stretching out his shoulders before rolling onto his side and propping his head on his hand as he looked at Zane. It would be a trick for them to sleep in the double bed without one or both of them ending up on the floor at least once. But Zane figured he might just curl up around Ty close enough that it wouldn’t matter.
Zane finished with the towel and tossed it to the floor. When he glanced back, that grin was still in place on Ty’s lips. Zane snorted, enjoying the sparkle in Ty’s eyes. He reached out and let his fingers coast down Ty’s cheek to drift over the compass rose at his neck. “You know how to break me.”
“That’s the last thing on my mind,” Ty murmured. He scooted forward and pressed his lips to Zane’s. He didn’t try to deepen the kiss or grope Zane like he usually did. It was a simple, sweet gesture, one that he ended all too soon as he rolled onto his back once more.
He put one arm under his head and stretched the other out under Zane’s neck. “Come here,” he said in a low voice.
Zane shifted to curl against Ty’s warm body under the curve of his arm. He slid his hand over Ty’s waist and settled his arm there so he could hold Ty as well.
Ty turned his head enough to nuzzle his nose and mouth against Zane’s. He wrapped his arm around Zane’s shoulders and held him close, bringing his other hand to his waist to rest on Zane’s hand there. He was silent, his body loose and still. Zane had rarely ever felt Ty when he was truly relaxed. Even in sleep or after drinking, his muscles always seemed to be tight and tense, his body ready for action.
Zane hummed. “Wish I had this effect on you more often.”
“What effect?”
“This one,” Zane said as he slid his hand up Ty’s torso until he could trace Ty’s lax features with his fingers. “You’re so relaxed. It’s quite a sight.”
“I’m always relaxed,” Ty mumbled, though the smile in his voice told Zane he was merely poking fun at himself. He hugged Zane closer, kissing his forehead.
“Is this the result of your little sabbatical?”
“Partly.Mostly it’s my dangerous lack of caffeine right now.”
Zane smiled, and he couldn’t help but ask, “Where’d the sandalwood come from?”
“Deuce. His crazy yoga girlfriend has gotten him on board the scent therapy stuff. It’s supposed to relieve stress. I don’t know if it works; I just think it smells good.”
Zane laughed, and Ty chuckled along with him. The warmth soaking through Zane was heady and addictive. He couldn’t remember being this content to just be still and next to Ty, although it was always pleasant. Now it meant even more, because Zane knew exactly how special this was.
He would never have imagined, even after their first night together, when Ty had held him all night, that they could ever have this.
“I was sure, when we met, that you were a straight-arrow ladies’ man,” Zane said. He pressed a soft kiss to the hollow of Ty’s shoulder.
Ty laughed. “You were half-right.”
Zane pushed himself up so he could look at Ty. “How’s that work?” he asked, a smile pulling at his lips.
“What?”
“Half-straight? Half ladies?” Zane poked at Ty’s belly, his finger hitting hard muscle. “You’ve never mentioned any other men.”
Ty shifted again and reached up to run his hand down Zane’s arm, letting his fingers play over Zane’s muscles. “I think it’s been pretty half and half, who I’m attracted to. Most of the other men I’ve been with have been one-time hookups,” he admitted, words careful, as if he were trying to gauge Zane’s reaction as he said it.
Zane wasn’t quite sure what problem Ty thought he’d have with it; that pretty much described him too. “Are you expecting… shock?”
Ty snorted and shook his head. “You’ve just never asked me about this kind of stuff, I keep expecting your head to spin or something.”
Zane laughed. He shrugged the shoulder he wasn’t lying on. “I mean, I’ve obviously switch-hit and bounced around. It’d be pretty shitty of me to judge you for the same.”
Ty nodded. “Well… you know I haven’t been a saint. Most of the people I’ve been with have been… let’s just say I remember the majority by the names of the bar or city I met them in,” he said, unembarrassed by the fact. Ty had never tried to present himself to Zane as anything but what he was. That honesty was oddly assuring to Zane now that they were exclusive.
“Was there ever anyone serious?”
“A few,” Ty answered. “A couple women I didn’t love but I could see myself with long-term, one in particular, but….” He cleared his throat and shook his head. “The connection never felt right. It was always so much more natural with a guy. I was always scared to get too involved with the guys I met, though. There was only one I ever let myself fall hard for, before you.”
It was fascinating, watching Ty from so close when his expressions were so open and honest. Zane tried to follow his eyes, but Ty clearly felt a little awkward with all the sharing, and he continued to stare at the ceiling. “I get the feeling it’s been a while,” Zane said, moving his hand over Ty’s stomach.
“I was young,” Ty said with a nod. “I don’t know if we really loved each other or not. I’m not sure if you even know what love is at seventeen. Felt like it at the time. Enough to scare us. We decided we had to get away from each other before we fell too hard.” He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. “That’s why I joined the Marines, you know. I never told anyone that.”
Zane blinked in surprise. “Really? I thought you were following the family tradition. Semper fi and all that.”
“That just made it easy to explain. No one asked any questions; they all just assumed I was following in Dad’s footsteps. I
had
thought about it before, it was something I knew I wanted to do, knew I’d be good at. But suddenly it was an escape route too.”
Zane trailed his finger down Ty’s chest as he listened, raptly watching Ty’s face.
“See, my senior year in high school we were playing in a big rivalry game homecoming weekend. I was on defense. I don’t remember why, I almost never played defense. But I was that night, and I sacked the other team’s quarterback. He was a senior too, played all the same sports, so I knew him a little bit from all the games we’d played against each other. I broke his leg.”
He winced with the memory, and Zane smiled. It was always fascinating to find out what Ty sympathized with.
“His last home game and he had to be carried off the field on a little cart. The next day I went to see him, tell him I was sorry. It was his left leg, full cast up to his thigh, so he couldn’t drive a stick, couldn’t get around. I felt guilty, so….” He laughed suddenly at the memory. “I wrote my phone number on his cast and told him to call me whenever he needed to go somewhere. We ended up… we spent a lot of time together. Hit it off.”
“Was he your first?”
“Yeah.” Ty reached up and idly twirled his finger through Zane’s hair. “His name was David.”
Zane tipped his head to the side to be closer to Ty’s fingers. It was a remarkably intimate action, and he loved that Ty was doing it, seemingly without thinking about it. He smiled at the idea of a teenage Ty flirting with a guy he’d literally maimed the night before, writing his number on the guy’s cast to get him to call him. It was sweet, in a very Grady sort of way. “Have you seen him since?”
“Couple times,” Ty answered with a nod. “He’s a lawyer down in Richmond.”
Zane reached to touch Ty’s cheek. “Does it bother you to tell me?”
Ty waited a moment before answering in a surprised voice. “Not really. I guess it’s just been a secret for so long….”
“So how’d he turn out?” Zane asked, not wanting to press his lover on the topic of secrets. “Bachelor? Married?”
“Long-term relationship with a guy he met in college,” Ty answered wryly. His smile fell and he shook his head, closing his eyes as he continued to play with Zane’s hair. “He’s the only thing I’ve ever run from.”
“Being attracted to another man at that time in your life, I’m sure it was a shock to deal with,” Zane said. “I probably would have run too.”
The only thing Zane had known when he’d been that age was Becky. How would he have handled it if those feelings had been for another guy? He wasn’t sure.
“Maybe,” Ty murmured. “Am I the first guy you’ve been involved with? I mean, beyond the ones you left in the alley.”
Zane pressed his index finger on the slight wrinkles between Ty’s brows and rubbed, trying to get him to open his eyes. Ty batted at his hand, then caught it and kissed it, trapping it against his chest.
“Yes,” Zane answered. “I didn’t even consider being with a guy until after Becky was gone, but up to that point I hadn’t considered being with
anyone
.” It came out so easily, he surprised himself. Usually thinking about Becky at least echoed some sort of pain. But here with Ty, it didn’t hurt. It was a chapter in his life that was finally over.
“Why’d you start?” Ty asked him as he held Zane’s hand firmly to his chest to keep him from poking at his face again.
“Lust,” Zane answered. “It was while I was undercover in Miami, working a smuggling operation from Colombia. We were treated to our choice of escorts, and there was this… well, he was the first one that caught my eye and I couldn’t look away. I figured what the hell, new experiences. After a few times I figured out I enjoyed being with a guy morethan any woman I’d been with. It was fun, a good way to blow off steam, really hot.”
Ty nodded, remaining quiet as he rubbed his thumb back and forth over Zane’s hand. He could feel Ty relaxing against him again, body loosening and growing more languid as he held him close. Zane smiled and shifted to lie down again, this time settling his cheek on Ty’s breastbone. “So tell me about the one woman. One woman among so many,” he quipped.
Ty immediately groaned and jerked under him. “I was hoping that would slip past you,” he said, only partly joking.
“Not hardly,” Zane drawled. He pressed his lips to Ty’s skin for a moment. “Tell me anyway.”
Ty cleared his throat. “Her name was Ava,” he said in defeat. “I met her when I was in New Orleans. I almost proposed to her.”
“Really?” Zane blurted, lifting his head to look at Ty.
Ty smiled and shrugged one shoulder. “I could never convince myself it was a good idea. I was right. It didn’t stick.”
“That’s why I’m surprised,” Zane admitted.
“Why?” Ty asked, shifting uncomfortably but meeting Zane’s eyes anyway.
“Because you stuck with me.”
Ty pressed his lips together, looking at Zane worriedly for a moment before reaching up and sliding his palm against Zane’s cheek. “I didn’t love her. And I wasn’t the one who ended it,” he admitted.
“I’m sorry,” Zane whispered, even though deep down he really wasn’t. Ty shook his head. Zane studied him for a long moment. “How long ago was this?”
“Right before Katrina hit,” Ty murmured, frowning as he tried to remember how many years ago that had been.
“Five years this summer.” Zane said. He paused, swallowing hard before asking, “Do you… does it still hurt?”
Ty laughed before he could stop himself. He clapped his hand over his mouth as if he was trying to hide the reaction, and he shook his head.
Zane pushed up to look down at him, not sure how to interpret that reaction.
“I’m sorry,” Ty said hastily, reaching for Zane’s arm to stop him from pulling away. “It’s just your choice of words is….” He laughed again and took Zane’s hand, pulling it to the side of his stomach, just under his ribs, to let Zane’s fingers rest against his skin. “You feel that scar there?” he asked as he placed Zane’s fingers along a faded scar Zane had noticed before.
Zane frowned and nodded, feeling the smooth raised line of scar tissue under his fingertips. It went from the front of Ty’s hip to the back, like he’d been grazed. Then his eyes widened. “She did this?”
“Threw a butcher’s knife at me,” Ty told him, voice tinged with an odd mixture of amusement and irritation. “Her aim was usually better, so I’m pretty sure she missed on purpose.”
“She was pretty set on
ending
it, then.”
Ty shook his head and inhaled deeply as he relaxed back into bed. “It was my fault. She didn’t know I was a Fed,” he said with true regret. “By the time I realized I might have real feelings for her, I was stuck. Couldn’t figure out how to tell her and not blow my cover. She didn’t even know my last name. I don’t know what I was thinking, I guess… I just hoped she’d still care for me after the case was over and I could come clean to her. But then, when Katrina was bearing down, they pulled everyone, UC or not, to help with evacuation and prepare for search and rescue. I went to her and told her to leave, that I’d found a transport for her and her family to get out safely. She refused until I promised I’d go with them. But I couldn’t leave. I had to tell her why just to get her on the helicopter.”
It was an easy question to ask why she’d been upset, but it wasn’t one Zane needed an answer to. It was difficult when you lived a life undercover, and many people didn’t take kindly to such thorough lies, even for the best of reasons. Ty had given up someone he thought he could love to save her.
“Why didn’t you go back?”
“Well… I was sort of afraid she’d try again with a knife that was easier to throw,” Ty answered, laughing. He bit his lip, looking up at Zane with eyes that shined even in the dim light.“No. The hurricane hit. The city just got… wiped off the map, pretty much. For days we did nothing but
survive
. Pull people out of the water, kids and animals and old people. Me and everyone else down there cried ourselves to sleep whenever we got the chance. All I could do was make sure they were all okay, everyone I’d known, you know, undercover. But every UC in New Orleans that got blown had to be transferred after the search and rescue became body recovery and they started getting people out. They didn’t give us a chance to linger. That’s how I ended up in Baltimore. I never saw her again after that night.”
Zane didn’t understand. If Ty had really cared for her, or even thought he might have loved her, how had he given her up so easily?
Ty shifted and looked at Zane with a sigh. “You look… disturbed. You’re wondering why I didn’t try harder to get her back, right?” Ty nodded, as if answering his own question. “I cared about her, I did. But after a week or two I realized that she wasn’t the first thing I thought of when I woke up. And when something would happen during the day, she wasn’t the first person I thought I needed to tell it to.” He looked at Zane and smiled. “Not like you. I wasn’t in love with her. She deserved someone who was.”