Dangerous Confessions of the Heart (Dangerous Secrets of the Heart) (15 page)

              “My…my brother…?” I asked as I stared into his eyes.

              “Yes.” She said excitingly.

              I began to breath heavy. I didn’t know how to react. Was I dreaming, was this real? “Okay…I need answers and I need them now!” I said holding my head. My head was spinning.

              Jesse took my hand. “Excuse us.” He said as he pulled me down the hall toward another room. We entered a large library. There were three stories of selves with books. In the corner of the room was a large, black piano. There were tables to sit and read couches and desks, even computers. He led me towards the piano. I sat beside him as he played a beautiful melody on the piano. After he was finished I realized I needed answers, I needed him to tell me everything.

              “Jesse, please I can’t stand this; what is going on?” I asked franticly as tears began to fill my eyes. “I feel like…like… I’m in a…in a dream.”

              “It’s no dream. I’ll tell you the whole story.” He began trying to settle me. “Here it goes: A while ago, after your parents divorced, I began to work for your father. I lived in his town. He hired me to chop wood for his lumbering business. When I realized your mother was dating my father I warned her, I warned her of what kind of man he is. Unfortunately she didn’t listen until he started drinking and became violent. A few months past of this and she took shelter with me. Pleading with me, talking to me, and coming to my work to protect herself from the danger of my father.”

“Where was I?” I asked.

“…Most of the time; with your father.” He admitted. “She would only come while your father was with you or when he wasn’t working and you were safe with a relative.” He said. “But…around that time is when you and your father had the falling out and you didn’t want anything to do with him. He tried to figure out why. He asked me to ask your mother to investigate as to why.”

“Okay…” I said.

“She didn’t have any luck.”

“That’s because I never told her about Andrea.” I admitted.

“Right, but Bill promised to sober up, promised to be faithful and not hit her because she threatened to leave if he didn’t. A few weeks later she stopped coming to the lumber mill. She came to town on a business trip a few months later and ran into your father. He told her about the break up with Andrea and pleaded with her to talk to you. He had a feeling that was the reason. They had dinner and they realized their love never died. He proved that to her the night before she left town. She became pregnant and knew she would have to leave Bill. That’s what she wanted anyway but when she told Bill he became violent and began to drink again. I knew what he was capable of so once I found out, I did what I could to protect you and your mother… your father gave me notes to earn your trust…umm, things you like and don’t like… favorite colors that sort of thing.  But before I knew it I had falling in love with you.”

I smiled at him. “So…what did you do?”

“When I left for that month…I wasn’t with my sick aunt or whatever I told you I was…I was with your father, trying to fight my feelings for you. I failed at that and I asked him if he minded…if I could…ask you to be mine… He said it would make him proud to have a son-in-law like me. He gave me the dress and the videos to watch and find out what kind of things you like, so I could impress you to make you love me too… also he asked me to give them to you when you were ready to listen and hear his name again.”

“Oh…” I said as his face became more serious.

“Then I found out about the “murder” that was going to happen to your mother, so I put a bullet-proof vest on your mother to protect her from the bullets the day of.”

“You did?” I said.

“Yes, because I knew losing your mother would have been hard on you. You might have distance yourself from me. I couldn’t let that happen. But surprisingly it brought us closer together. I tried to get us away from Bill. Your father and mother were the ones I was going to meet up with but they were discovered.”

“Why didn’t you just tell me?” I asked.

“Well, I seen how you reacted to your mother the day she mentioned your father…I didn’t want to make you run from me…but as far as your mother, I tried to tell you several times once I found out that she was still alive but then the baby thing happened and I…I should have told you…I’m sorry.” He apologized.

“The night that Bill took me…Did you have sex with Sarah?” I asked.

“No, she admitted they had put a camera in the hotel room. I kissed her in the moment of us reuniting and she threw the covers over us. She began to moan and kiss on my neck. I pushed her off a few moments later and explained that I love you.” He explained.

I gave him a grateful look. “I didn’t see any of that…” I admitted.

“I figured…” He said. “That’s all my secrets. It all boils down to the fact that I’m truly, madly, deeply in love with you.” He confessed. “The movies, the notes, the dress… I used them to get information so you would fall in love with me too…”

Chapter 17

              “Jesse…can I make a confession?” I asked.

              “Of course...” He said.

              “You didn’t need to take notes or learn what I liked to make me to fall in love with you.” I admitted. “I was already in love with you the first day we met…hell, I was transfixed on you.”

              He smiled.

              “Truth is…I still am.” I said with a smile.

              He grabbed me and pulled me in to kiss me but just as our lips touch I heard someone clearing their throat. I pulled away and looked up. It was Austin. He had changed his clothes from the bloody suit to jeans and a shirt.

              “Hey…” I embarrassedly said.

              “Your parents told me to tell you that dinner is ready.” He announced.

              I didn’t know what to say. How much did he hear? I didn’t want to break his heart this way. I remind silent.

              “Thank you Austin.” Jesse said as he looked at my face. “Come on. I’m sure they will want to talk to you.”

              I rolled my eyes as Jesse got up. I took his hand and reluctantly walked to the dinner table where my parents were. Sarah had changed from her blood soaked wedding dress into jeans and a shirt from my mother as well.

              “Here Jesse, I’m guessing these will fit you.” Mom said handing Jesse a stack of clothes.

              He walked into the other room and changed as well.

              We sat down at the dinner table. Mom had made my favorite: medium steaks, mash potatoes, rolls, green beans and macaroni & cheese. It smelled delicious.

              As we began to eat, dad and mom explained the story that Jesse just told me. They said they moved here not long after they were discovered in Florida and had the baby. The word baby struck Jesse.

              “Oh…The baby? Where is the baby?” Jesse asked.

              “…” I hung my head.

              “What happened?” He asked.

              I could feel everyone staring at me waiting for the answer. “The night…that Bill and James got me… Bill offered me a deal to leave and never return…I refused of course…” I began the story of my worst night ever. “But…because I refused…James was ordered to “take care of the baby”…he repeatedly kicked my stomach after throwing me down a flight of stairs.”

              My eyes started to tear as I thought about the pain of that night.

“I lost the baby…James put me in the hospital with a new identity and some cash. Once I was out he ordered me to leave and call me when I got where I was going… I couldn’t refuse; he said he would kill me if I didn’t go. I thought I had lost everything: mom, Jesse, the baby, I thought I even lost my father…” I confessed.

              “You…you never told me any of this…” Austin whispered interrupting me.

              “…One of my best kept secrets.” I admitted as tears rolled down my checks.

              Jesse’s blood began to boil. “I’ll kill him…he killed my baby. He is the reason for all of this.”

              “Jesse. You wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for him…” I tried to get him to see.

              “Damn right I wouldn’t. I would be at home, with you, and newborn baby.” He said.

              “But if he hadn’t left that wedding announcement, I wouldn’t have gone back to look for you.” I admitted. “I would have stayed here, most likely married Austin and had a few babies here.”

              I realized the sting of my words as they flowed out of my mouth. I looked at Austin. His face looked wounded.

              “And he did help you escape the church.” Sarah pointed out.

I looked away from Austin. I couldn’t think about the pain I had just caused him.

“He loved you…whether he showed it or not…he was looking out for me and JJ.” Sarah tried to defend her husband.

              “I guess I understand…I would have done the same thing if it were Jamie.” He admitted.

              “Speaking of James…are we heading back soon? I need to make sure he’s okay. And you obviously don’t need me anymore.” She said.

              “I’ll go with you… We’ll all go.” I spoke up.

              “Well, your father and I have to stay here with Stanly, but you four, be careful and we will see you when you get back.” My mother said.

              “Thanks Helen.” Jesse said.

              I hugged my parents and kissed Stan. “I love you guys.” I said embracing them tightly.

              “We love you.” They said.

              I didn’t want to leave their arms. I spent several minutes in them. I couldn’t believe this had happened, my mother was safe. My father was safe and I had a new little brother. Everything was great… ”well almost everything…” I thought as I looked towards the road at Austin’s mustang.

              “I’ll be back soon.” I told my parents.

              I climbed in Austin’s mustang with the others. Austin drove while Sarah sat up front with him. Jesse and I were in the back.

              “So, is your friend with the jet still there?” Austin asked.

              “I called him a few minutes ago; he said he never left…he’s got the jet fueled up and ready.” Jesse said. “I really have missed you.” He whispered to me and gently slid his hand against mine.

              “I missed you too Jesse.” I admitted in a whisper so Austin couldn’t hear.

              He began to feel my finger as I realized I was wearing Austin’s ring.

              He pulled it up and looked at it. “What is this?” He whispered hatefully.

              “Um…I was going to tell you…” I whispered trying to keep it between us.

              “An engagement ring…? You’re wearing his engagement ring.” He said out loud.

              “Yes but…” I started.

              “Just…just don’t.” he said.

              I turned my head towards the window and he did the same. We sat in silence as we drove to the airport. I could tell Jesse was angry, but he wouldn’t let me explain. I had no idea he still wanted to be with me.

              We boarded Johnny’s jet; Jesse sat up front with Johnny in the copilot seat and Austin, Sarah and I sat in the back. They were up towards the front and I was sitting alone in the back trying to figure out what to do. I fiddled with the dolphin ring then removed it. I placed it back on my chain necklace. I noticed Sarah walking toward me.

              “Hey.” She said.

              “Hey.” I repeated.

              “Whatcha thinking about…?” She asked.

              “I…I don’t know what to do Sarah.” I said.

              “Regarding?” She asked.

              “I have two great guys…How do you know who is right for you?” I asked.

              “Believe it or not…I was in that same situation.” She began as she sat in front of me. “Two guys…”

              “What did you do?” I asked.

              “Your heart…will eventually tell you.” She said. “It’s hard… you really don’t know. But then one day…it hits you”

              “So…you just…knew?” I asked.

              “Well no…I made my decision based on the paternity of my baby.” She said. “JJ…I didn’t know if he was James’ or Jesse’s until he was born.”

              “So…you still love them both?” I said.

              “Yes. But I knew where my heart truly belonged when I heard the doctor say it was James’” She admitted. “You see…I don’t believe things just happen. Everything has a purpose…Fate will always intervene.”