Dark Chaos (# 4 in the Bregdan Chronicles Historical Fiction Romance Series) (2 page)

             
“And I love you, Carrie Cromwell,” Thomas replied.  “I won’t be able to say that much longer, you know.  After today you will be Carrie Borden.”

             
“Carrie Borden,” she murmured.  “Has a nice ring to it, don’t you think?”

             
Both were laughing when they entered the dining room.  Carrie was disappointed to see two of her father’s boarders seated with Janie at the table, but then she immediately chided herself for her selfishness.  The boarders’ financial contribution was crucial in this difficult time.  Besides, the city was simply too crowded; every home had to be willing to expand to bursting.  It wasn’t fair to expect all the boarders to disappear just because it was her wedding day.   “Good morning,” she said graciously.

             
“Good morning,” Drew Cummings responded, glancing up briefly from the paper he was perusing.

             
“Good morning,” James Botler said shortly and then turned immediately to her father.  “Mr. Cromwell, I’m so glad you’re here this morning.”  He stopped short, his round face flushed.  “But do you really think this is any time to be away from the Capitol?”

             
Carrie saw her father shoot James a warning glance, but it didn’t stem his flow of words. 

             
“Surely you realize how critical the situation is becoming!” James exclaimed.

             
“Oh, keep your shirt on,” Drew responded calmly.  “Every spring it’s the same.  Some Union army is coming to take Richmond.  They even tried it this winter at Fredericksburg.  Haven’t you learned General Lee is capable of protecting this city?”  He turned to Thomas.  “Have you seen everyone down by the river?  I walked through some of the markets yesterday.  The prices they are charging for fresh fish is absolutely ludicrous.  Half the town seems to have taken fishing poles and nets down to the water.  They’re not going to take any more price gouging.”

             
“Price gouging!”  James snorted.  “Who cares what fish costs if we lose our capital?  I’ve heard that the new Union general, Hooker, has over 125,000 men sitting on the other side of the Rappahannock.”

Carrie listened with a sinking heart.  Of course, she knew of the buildup of the troops – was aware the Union army had been sitting just forty miles from Richmond almost all winter.   The Union army, severely demoralized after their stunning loss at Fredericksburg under General Burnside, had been rebuilding and regrouping under the leadership of General Hooker.  It wasn’t news to her; it just wasn’t anything she wanted to hear right now. 

              Thomas cut into James’ hot words.  “I think Drew is right.  General Lee is quite a capable commander.”

             
Carrie shot a quick look at her father.  His voice carried none of the confidence his words did. 

             
“You can’t possibly think General Lee can defeat an army twice his size,” James protested.  “Why, we’re going to have another Antietam on our hands.  No one really claimed that to be a Southern loss, but losing 20,000 men is not my idea of a victory.  The South can’t stand many more battles like that.  And from what I can tell, Lee doesn’t have nearly the same strength in his defensive position that he held at Fredericksburg.”

             
Carrie felt the bile rise in her throat at the mention of Antietam.  The horror of the last eight months - imagining Robert dead or horribly wounded when he had been declared missing in action at Antietam - was still fresh in her memory.  What if she had regained him only to lose him to another Union bullet?

             
“What I think,” Thomas said sharply, “is that this is no time for such talk.  In case you have forgotten, Mr. Botler, my daughter is getting married today.”

             
James scowled.  “She won’t be the first to become a soldier’s widow.  Pretending the situation isn’t critical doesn’t change the reality,” he said harshly.

             
Carrie had heard enough.   She put her hand on her father’s arm to stop his angry barrage of words.  Fighting to keep anger and fear from her voice, she turned to James.  “There is not a person in this room who can change the reality of this horrible war, Mr. Botler.  There is also not a person in this room who cannot benefit from closing out the darkness for a while and letting what little good there is in this mess to become a more present reality.  It’s called grasping for whatever good there is in a bad situation.  It’s called hope.  It’s the only thing any of us have to hang on to.”  She took a deep breath.  “I realize my getting married today doesn’t change the fact Hooker may cross the river tomorrow.  But for just one day, I want the good things in my life to overrule the bad.  Is that such a horrible thing?”

             
James flushed and lowered his eyes.  “I’m sorry, Miss Cromwell.  I guess I’m just worried.”

             
“All of us are worried,” Janie chimed in.  “But I’ve heard a lot of the people in Richmond talking.  The last year has toughened them.  They made it through last summer when McClellan tried to take the city.  They have endured one of the hardest winters anyone can imagine.  Now it’s spring.  They have chosen hope.  They will live their lives as if the city might not fall in the next few days.  There is nothing any of us here can do.  It’s up to General Lee and his men.  We will deal with whatever consequences come.  In the meantime, we will live our lives.”

             
James nodded slowly.  “I won’t bother you with anymore of my talk,” he promised.  “I have a job to do.  I guess I’ll go do it.” He shoved his chair back from the table and reached for his hat on the nearby hat rack.  “Congratulations, Miss Cromwell,” he said sincerely.  “I hope you have a wonderful day.”   He moved toward the door then stopped.  “I truly do apologize.  It’s just that I find myself feeling sick inside when I think of the North coming down here and conquering us.  I can’t help being angry.”  Nodding briefly, he crammed his hat on his head and strode out.

             
There was silence until James had exited the room. 

             
“I’m sorry, Carrie,” Thomas said.  “I didn’t want anything to spoil your day.” 

             
“It’s all right,” Carrie smiled.  “Today, I have Robert.  Today, we’re getting married.  For just one day, I’m not worrying about tomorrow.”

             
Carrie fidgeted restlessly as Janie arranged her hair.  She lapsed into stillness then seconds later shifted her weight again.

             
“I declare, Carrie Cromwell, if you don’t sit still it’s going to look as if a flock of birds made a nest in your hair!”  Janie finally burst out in exasperation.

             
Carrie sighed heavily and settled down again.  “Are you almost done?” she said impatiently.  “I’m sorry,” she apologized immediately.  “I’ve never been known for my patience,” she said ruefully then smiled brilliantly.  “Can you believe it?  I’m really marrying Robert today.”

             
Janie nodded calmly.  “Your captain should be arriving any minute.”  She pushed down on Carrie’s shoulders firmly.  “Two minutes and I’ll be done with this.  Can you possibly sit still for just two more minutes?”

             
“I suppose,” Carrie said meekly then let her thoughts take her mind off her enforced confinement.  Robert had been promoted from lieutenant to captain as soon as he had reported back to his unit.   She couldn’t care less about his military status - she simply wanted him alive.  His rank of captain would only make him more valuable to the Confederate war cause.  She squirmed suddenly and peeked up at Janie.  “You don’t think they’ll make him fight in this new battle, do you?  He’s only been home a week.  Surely he’s not strong enough for that.”  She knew her voice sounded pathetically hopeful.

             
Janie paused then tried to sound reassuring.  “I’m sure they can do without one captain long enough for you to have some time together.”

             
Carrie knew Janie didn’t believe what she was saying, but she decided not to press it.  She may have only illusions to make her happy, but she would live in them until reality forced her to do otherwise. 

             
Janie inserted the last pin, glided over to the wardrobe, and lifted the white dress off the hanger.  “Is the bride ready for her gown?”

             
Carrie rose in one fluid movement and raised her arms obediently.  “Have you ever thought about applying for a job as a servant?” she teased.  “You seem to have a natural affinity for it.”

             
Janie stuck out her tongue.  “Unless emancipation truly takes place, I just don’t think it would pay well enough.  I would have too many slaves to compete with.”

             
Carrie laughed along with her then sobered.  “Oh, Janie, this war just has to free the slaves.   What if things are still the same when this horrible war is over?”

             
Janie shook her head firmly.  “Not one word about the war,” she said sternly.  “This is your wedding day.  The war will still be here tomorrow.  For today you’re just a beautiful bride about to be married to a dashing man.”  She settled the dress over Carrie’s head, buttoned it into place, and then took a step back.  “Even with such a simple gown, you are absolutely lovely,” she said with deep admiration.

             
Carrie spun to gaze into the mirror above her dresser.   “Father wanted to buy a much more elaborate gown, but I wouldn’t let him.  I think it’s criminal to spend gobs of money on a wedding dress when so many people are starving.”  She twirled as she looked at herself critically.  The dress was very plain, but she had to admit it was becoming.  The lines hugged her slender waistline then fell outward in graceful folds.  “I wish Mother was here,” she said softly.

             
“She would be very proud of you,” Janie reached over to tuck in a final errant strand of hair. 

             
Carrie stared into the mirror for a moment before moving away to stand by the window.  A warm breeze filled the room with the fragrant perfume of spring flowers and swirled the light blue curtains into a graceful dance.  Once again Carrie felt her heart fly over the treetops to Cromwell Plantation.  “Mother used to talk about the day I would get married.  She had plans to make it the social event of the season.  There was nothing she liked more than large parties attended by the right people,” she said affectionately.  “It used to drive me crazy because I just didn’t care about things like that, but before Mother died we had learned to accept each other.   I miss her,” she said wistfully.  She scowled and swung around to give Janie a fierce hug.  “Absolutely no more sad thoughts.  I have Robert and Father and wonderful friends like you.  My life is incredibly rich.”  Humming a catchy tune, she pulled Janie into a wild dance around the room as she determined to chase the goblins of sadness away.  Soon the girls’ laughter filled the room and cascaded through the house. 

             
Janie finally pulled away, gasping to catch her breath.  “You will be a mess,” she accused between gulps of air. 

             
“Pooh,” Carrie scoffed.  “You put enough pins in my head to secure it in the midst of a gale.”

             
Suddenly a knock sounded at the door.  “Is anyone else invited to your party?” a deep voice called.

             
Janie flew to the door and swung it open.  “Your daughter is all ready, Mr. Cromwell.  I’ll see you downstairs.”

             
“Most of the guests are here,” Thomas responded, not taking his eyes off Carrie.  “Pastor Anthony and Robert should be here any minute.”

             
“I’ll make sure everything is taken care of,” Janie said reassuringly then shut the door. 

             
Thomas turned to Carrie.  “You look absolutely beautiful,” he said in a strained voice.  He walked closer.  “Just as pretty as your mother was on our wedding day.”

             
Carrie’s eyes welled with tears at the look of tenderness on his face.  “I wish she could be here.”

             
“I have a feeling she knows what is happening,” Thomas replied softly.  “And I’m sure she would approve.”