Dark Seeker (16 page)

Taking a deep breath, she closed her magazine and headed into the living room to answer the door. Isabelle stood in the doorway, holding the door open.

“Hi Matt, I’m Mrs. Grey. It’s nice to meet you,” she said in an overexcited motherly tone.

“Good afternoon, Mrs. Grey. Is Janie here?”

“Yes.” Isabelle gestured for Matt to come in. “Why don’t you two hang out in the living room. I’ll go out on the porch and read. I made some cookies, if you’re interested.” Janie rolled her eyes. She hoped Matt didn’t get the impression they were made especially for him.

“Hi Janie,” Matt said, stepping into the house. His moss-green sweater enhanced the green in his hazel eyes. She smiled. He always had that varsity jacket on.

Janie gave him a quick wave and slid her hands into her pockets. She looked past Matt. “Thanks, Mom.” Isabelle winked and slipped out the door.

“Should we sit?” Janie said, wanting to avoid the awkward standing and staring scenario. “What did you need to talk to me about?”

“After you.” He extended his arm for her to pass.

“You look good.” She gave him the once-over. “You’d never know you were attacked—twice.” Janie sat on the far end of the couch.

Matt bypassed the first cushion and chose the one next to her.

“Don’t remind me.” He focused on her mouth. “Your lip.” He reached out, not quite close enough to touch her, but close enough to make her arch her back. “It looks painful.”

“I’ll be fine. It’s healing.” Instinctively, she touched the cut with her first two fingers. The salt from her skin stung the incision. She cringed.

Matt twirled his class ring around his finger. “I—I was wondering if you wanted to go to Homecoming with me.”

Janie gasped. “What?”

“Do you want to go to Homecoming, with me?” He blushed. She felt bad about her outward display of shock, but his question came out of left field. Prepared for pretty much anything, even him saying he loved her, she coughed, trying to compose herself.
Homecoming, seriously?

Janie ran her fingers through her hair. It was still damp underneath. She fumbled over how to answer. “I don’t think you really mean that. Trust me. If I hadn’t saved your life the other night, you wouldn’t be asking me. You’d be asking Molly.”

“The other night and Molly have nothing to do with me asking you.” He moved closer to her, causing Janie to tense up even more. The arm of the sofa dug deeper into her back.

“You don’t know what you’re saying. I’ve Imprinted you. You like me because I saved your life.” Matt stared at her with a look of incomprehension. “Matt, it can happen when someone like me saves a person’s life. That person can feel drawn to the other, feeling as if they like them, when really they have just been Imprinted. What you are feeling is not real. It’s an illusion.”

“Why do you keep saying that?” He reached for the hand she rested on the cushion. She pulled back.

“Because it’s true.” She could tell by his unfazed expression that he didn’t believe her.

He inched closer to her. “Let’s just say you’re wrong. Will you go with me to the dance?”

“No.” She scooted to the edge of the cushion.

“Is it because you don’t like me?” he pressed.

“No, I mean, I don’t know,” she stuttered.

Matt scanned the room and settled on the sofa table. Her rose was displayed in a small crystal vase. She hadn’t realized her mother put it there. “The day you saved me, I smiled at you after class.” He paused in thought. Janie’s eyes widened;
he remembered
. “I liked you
before
you stopped that vampire thing from draining my blood.”

Janie thought back to the day of the match, at Ava’s locker between classes, before she had to rescue him from being killed by a Daychild that evening…

As Ava bent over to retrieve her book, she saw Matt Baker exiting the classroom behind her. Matt offered Janie a genuine smile. Ava stood up, blocking Janie’s view of the star wrestler. Not that Janie cared. She had a job to do. That was it. Anything else just complicated things.

“I didn’t smile back,” Janie said, returning to the present. “It’s not that I didn’t want to—”

Matt waved it off, signaling that it was okay. “You don’t have to explain yourself. Biology kind of sucks, with all the cheerleaders, and Molly. I didn’t really expect to get a response from you.”

She tried to explain. “Even if you did like me before that night, I don’t think me saving your life helped the situation. You don’t really feel the way you think you do about me.”

“And how exactly do you know this, considering I’ve never told you how I feel?”

Janie realized he was right. He’d never actually told her how he felt. She just assumed. She wasn’t the type jocks usually fell for. Maybe Isabelle was right. Janie had blown the whole situation out of proportion. Maybe she hadn’t Imprinted him after all. “I feel like a fool. I shouldn’t have assumed. I’m sorry.” She met his hazel eyes.

A satisfied smile formed on his face. “So now that it’s settled, will you go with me? I’d hate to have to keep asking you every day so that you’d get so annoyed with me that you’d say yes just to get me to shut up.”

“You’d do that?” It was creepy and romantic at the same time.

“Do you really want to find out?”

“What about Molly? Aren’t you going with her? She’ll probably try to blow up the school with her aerosol hairspray when she finds out.”

“Does that mean your answer is yes?” He leaned in. She could smell the plastic edging of his varsity jacket and his musky cologne.

“You didn’t answer me. What about Molly? I really don’t want to have to take down the cheerleaders.”

“Janie?” He reached for her hand unexpectedly. She didn’t have time to pull back. His hand was soft and warm around hers. She found herself comparing it to Kai’s. Kai’s hand felt rougher and more temperate.

She immediately pushed any thoughts of Kai from her head. It was finally clear now. She needed to end their friendship, or at least slow it down. She intended to tell him the next time she saw him. They were spending too much time together.
Feelings complicate things. Distance, that is the answer.

Maybe going to the dance with Matt would help keep her mind occupied until she left. Give her an excuse to stop seeing Kai. “Yes, I’ll go with you.” Her tone contradicted her words. Matt didn’t seem to notice.

“Sorry to spring it on you at the last minute. I hope you have time to find a dress and whatever else you need.”

“I’m resourceful.” Janie smiled.

Matt stood, lifting Janie to a standing position by her hand. “Then I’ll see you tomorrow at school.”

“I’ll be there.” She nodded awkwardly.

Matt brushed a sweet kiss across the back of her hand—but the sparks weren’t there.

Janie placed her Algebra textbook and spiral notebook into her backpack. Her second time in Algebra II, and she still couldn’t grasp it. Luckily, Ava had agreed to tutor her. She headed out the door. Clouds blanketed the sky, threatening more rain, maybe even sleet if the temperature kept dropping.

She stepped on to the driveway and smiled. The dull gray asphalt appeared shiny and black, covered by the earlier rain. It was nice to be able to drive her Honda again. Janie ran her fingers over the smooth metal of the car’s hood and traced the fender with her eyes. Her car looked like new again. No large dent.

“It looks good. You wouldn’t even know you hit a pole.” Janie spun around. Kai leaned against the driver side door, dressed in his usual tee with dark jeans and black boots. She glared at him. He threw his hands out. “What, you told me to knock, but there isn’t a door out here.”

“You shouldn’t be here.” Janie shoved past him, holding her backpack securely over one shoulder. The smell of clean lavender hit her at once, making her heart race.

“Are you mad?” He turned to face her, stepping back from the car door. “Did I do something to upset you?”

She decided to confront him, to end the relationship right here and now. “No. I’m on my way out. Not everything is about you.”

“Matt,” Kai grunted. Like Matt was a virus that had infected her. It was all too much for her to handle.

“Not that it’s any of your business, but I’m going to Ava’s.” Janie jerked open the car door and threw her backpack over to the passenger seat. “Matt already came by. Again, not that it is any of your business.”

“Did he profess his love?” he said flippantly.

“You’re an ass.” She put one foot on the floor of the car and held the top of the door to steady herself.

Kai stepped forward. He sounded serious. “What did he want to ask you?”

Janie moved to get in the car, but something made her pause. Kai’s look, it was so. . .determined. He
really
wanted to know. “He asked me to the Homecoming dance,” she finally answered.

“He asked you to a dance?” Any seriousness flew from Kai’s tone. He bent over into a laugh. His blond waves bounced around his head.

“I’m leaving.” Janie plopped down into the driver’s seat. Kai held the door open so she couldn’t close it.

“What did you say to him?” He tried to give the appearance that her answer didn’t bother him, but she could see the veins popping out of his skin; his blood raced violently within them.

“I said yes.” Janie yanked on the door handle. “Now let go.”

“You don’t actually want to go with him.” Although she knew he was anything but weak, he appeared frail. His strong, lean body slumped over the car door. Hard lines crumpled across his forehead and his scars seemed even more pronounced under the gray sky.

“Yes, I do.” She made herself believe she spoke the truth even though every part of her screamed for someone else.
This is exactly why I shouldn’t have let my feelings dictate anything.

“What about us?” He let the door go, and defeated, he stepped back from the car. The grass crunched under his boots.

Janie sat silently in shock. She hadn’t expected his question. “There
is
no us,” she breathed, feeling just as defeated as he looked. She knew she was the only one to blame for causing both of them pain. She could have ended it the first night she met him.

Kai stood with his hands resting below his hips, thinking about something, maybe how to respond. “It’s because of what I am. I shouldn’t have told you. I should have let you think I was a monster.” He looked out into the street. A group of kids wearing heavy jackets played basketball in the cul-de-sac.

Janie stepped out of the car. She stomped over to him, contemplating how to tell him how she felt.
 
“What you are doesn’t bother me. I just don’t think we should be friends anymore. Ever since I met you, I’ve become sloppy, unfocused. I can’t allow my feelings for you to interfere with my job.”

His eyes left the ground and traced a perfect line up the front of her until they finally reached her eyes. “So you do have feelings for me?”

“That’s not what I meant.”

“You just said it.” He stepped closer to her, with an intensity so powerful it drowned out the world. Nothing else existed—the bouncing basketball on the black top and the laughter of playing children disappeared. Kai’s words flooded with raw emotion, a fresh wound that had been torn open.

“Then I said it wrong. Kai, I can’t see you anymore.” She pushed against his chest, but he didn’t move. He grabbed both of her wrists and held her in place. His green eyes blazed with an impassioned craving to want and to be wanted.

“You are the only person I have felt comfortable enough with to talk about my past. You can’t say you don’t want to see me anymore. You’re the only one who knows me.”

“That’s not my problem.” She tried to turn away from him but he held her tightly in place.

“You’re afraid,” he said.

She laughed. “Afraid of what, you?”

“You’re afraid of your feelings for me. You won’t ever let anyone in. You think that if you run from your feelings you won’t get hurt.” She yanked on her wrists. He finally let go. She threw her fists into his chest. Again he just stood, still and hard like a statue.

“My mom loved my father and now he’s dead. It’s not worth it.” She pivoted around to leave.

He shouted to her from behind. “What you’re doing with Matt isn’t right. You don’t feel anything for him. He’s safe.”

“And you’re not.” She strode to her car. She wanted the conversation to be over. She didn’t want to discuss Matt, Kai, or losing her father anymore. All the topics were too painful.

Kai materialized in front of her. Janie stumbled back, catching her heel on a lip of grass bordering the driveway. “You’re safe with me.” Kai wrapped his arms around her and guided her into his chest. For a moment she let herself have what she wanted. She let herself get lost in him. She dipped her head into his chest and let his heart beat loudly under her ear. “I know you feel it too,” he breathed into her hair.

Janie raised her head. He stared down at her. She wanted so badly to tell him how she felt, but at what risk? He could leave, or even worse, die. She couldn’t go through losing someone else she loved. She’d seen what her father’s death had done to her mother.
Is it really worth it?