darknadir (49 page)

* * *
Day 36

It was late afternoon of the next day before Brynne and Father Lijou were ensconced in one of the rooms at the Shrine with the meditation lamp.
"I'll watch you as before," said Lijou, arranging himself comfortably on the prayer mat.
Brynne nodded and began to recite the litanies that would allow him to slip into a light trance. He was still somewhat nervous and Lijou picked it up.
"There is nothing for you to fear, Brynne. As I've told you, you have Vartra's invitation to travel to His realm."

* * *

Vartra was not alone. Noni was with him, but it wasn't the Noni Brynne knew. This one was younger. The pelt and long, braided hair were no longer snow white but a rich brown; her back was straighter and she had no need of the stick.
"What you doing here, boy?" she demanded of him as Vartra let him into his cottage. She turned on the Entity, who, totally unperturbed, went for the jug of water and mugs on the sideboard. "He shouldn't be here!"
"I told you not to interfere, Noni," Vartra said, returning to the table."Sit, Brynne. You're welcome here. Noni was leaving."
She frowned. "I was, was I?"
"You were. Our business is concluded, Grandmother."
"Who brought him to you? Was it that tree-climbing, good for nothing Dhaika?"
As Brynne took a seat as far from her as possible, he could tell that though her outward form might have changed, she had not.
"I did. You asked for the price to be paid, Noni," said Vartra, holding her gaze with his. "It will be. Our way. And he is part of it."
Muttering under her breath, Noni got to her feet and turned to leave. As she went through the door, she looked back, fixing a steely glare on Brynne. "You, boy, did not see me here." Then she was gone.
"A strong female," said Vartra as the door closed behind her. "I will miss her when her time comes." He looked up at Brynne. "No, it's not soon," he said, mouth opening in a slight smile. "She stands for the old, wild ways of Shola, before the days of the guilds. Soon she will bring Teusi, the next generation, to me— a male for a female." He sighed, then picked up the jug to pour water into the two mugs.
"What brings you to my realm, Brynne Stevens? I see you have found Keeza Lassah." He pushed a mug toward Brynne, picking up his own. "And a cub on the way, too." He raised his mug to the Human before drinking.
Brynne picked up his drink. "You know about her?" He sipped the water. "Stupid question, really."
"She has her part to play."
"Did you send her to me? She said she followed a dream of Noni's garden and the smell of her nung tree."
"Not me. Perhaps Ghyakulla had a little to do with it."
"Tell me how come I feel her in my mind when I already have a Leska and a third," Brynne asked abruptly. "Garras is no telepath, is that why Keeza and I have a bond?" He took another drink from the mug, a larger one this time.
"There are no set groupings for you En'Shallans. What you are experiencing is the beginnings of something new. A community of people, all bound together by their Talents, be they great or small. Not in your lifetime, Brynne, but it'll be there for your children. You haven't told me yet why you came," he said gently.
Brynne blinked owlishly at him. He was finding it difficult to focus on his surroundings and was beginning to feel a little light-headed. He took another drink, then stopped, looking suspiciously at the mug before carefully putting it down. "Father Lijou sent me to ask what's going on," he said. "We know the Valtegans have got them, but we don't know why or which ones."
"Then you know more than I do. My knowledge is limited outside my realm, Brynne, as is the help I can give."
"What is your realm?"
"Look around you," invited Vartra. "What do you see?"
Gazing around the room, he peered through the haze gathering in front of his eyes. Images of gray-clad Sholans, weapons drawn, facing off an unseen enemy flicked into being: the blackness of space, sounds of conflict, and the scent of ozone in the air after energy weapons had been discharged.
"Then you've seen what's coming for yourself," he heard Vartra say as the scenes faded to darkness. "Danger lurks closer to home for some. You have to solve your own problems, Brynne. Use the skills Derwent taught you, then you can see without drinking the water from Ghyakulla's well."
The voice was fading now, leaving Brynne in darkness and silence as his head slumped down to hit the table.

* * *

With a gasp, Brynne came to and found himself back in the Shrine with Father Lijou helping him sit up. There was a mug of water in the priest's hand for him. He groaned, pushing the proffered drink aside as, inside his mind, he heard the faint sound of laughter.
"I hate it when He does that," muttered Brynne, putting his hand up to rub his head.
"What?" asked Lijou.
"Laughs like that."
"Kaid always said it was the most disconcerting thing about his visions," agreed the priest.
"That is only water, isn't it?"
Lijou frowned. "Of course."
"Good," he said, taking the mug from him and draining it. "Because I just got slipped a spiked drink by Vartra."
"You saw something then?"
"Yes. Armed Brothers in space."
"Where? Could you see where?"
"I don't know anything about space, Father Lijou. I wouldn't recognize the inside of a starship from a space station. It didn't look like all-out war, though. They were in a ship or a station, not fighting in small craft."
"Contact."
"Yeah, you could say that," he agreed, considering it for a moment. "He told me to use the stuff Derwent taught me rather than go drinking water from His well again."
Lijou looked at him expectantly.
"Maybe it's time I told you what Derwent taught me," Brynne said with a sigh. "One of the things I can do is go and look at a distant place, provided either there is someone there I know, or I have some information about where I'm going. It's as if I'm actually there."
"How far can you travel like this?" This wasn't new. Carrie and Kusac had done it before.
He shrugged. "Distance didn't seem to matter when we tried it. I could visit places back on Earth."
Lijou stared at him. "You could travel to where Kusac and Carrie are," he said. "Find out what's happening. Can you talk to people? Affect your surroundings at all?"
"I'm just an observer as far as I know."
Lijou's wrist comm buzzed, alerting him to an incoming call. He pressed receive and found Rhyaz' face looking at him.
"I'm with Brynne at the Shrine," he said.
"Call me back," said Rhyaz, signing off abruptly.
Lijou looked up at Brynne. "You'll have to excuse me. I'll meet you back at your house. You're fit to return on your own?"
Brynne nodded, getting to his feet. "Just tired," he said.

CHAPTER 14

Kaid had woken early, relieved, despite the Prime's assurances, to find Carrie curled against him still asleep. In the three nights she'd been back, this was her first restful sleep without nightmares. He hadn't been sure how best to help her. With T'Chebbi, it had been easier. She'd been kept prisoner by the Claws for several months before he was able to escape Stronghold and go back to Ranz for her. Then they were running for their lives; there was no time to stop and worry about anything else. He'd taken her to Noni, where the Brothers had been waiting for him. The repercussions of his illicit leave of absence had seen him incarcerated for several weeks before he was allowed to visit Noni again to see her.
His own experiences at the hands of his foster father weren't much help either, except he'd once been where she now was.
When he'd finally been allowed back into his room, Carrie had been sitting in his bed, wearing his gray tunic. She'd looked up as he'd entered.
"Before you ask, I'm all right," she said, but despite the fierce determination in her voice and mind, he could tell she wasn't.
He came closer, sitting on the edge of T'Chebbi's bed. "I'm not much of a bodyguard, am I?" he said, reaching out to touch her bruised cheek with gentile fingertips.
She flinched, then forced herself to remain still, but he dropped his hand without touching her.
"I tried to make them come for me but we rarely see the Primes. I'm sorry."
"It wasn't your fault," she said, hands clutching at the blanket wrapped over her legs. "It was because of Elise. She laughed at him."
He was at a loss to know what to do or say, and couldn't sense much from their Link as she was blocking her emotions from him— just as he was from her. "Can I do anything?" he asked. "Get you anything?"
She looked at him, eyes glittering too brightly in the artificial light. "Yes. You can hold me. I'm not made of glass."
"I didn't want to touch you without knowing I could," he said, going down on his knees to wrap his arms carefully round her. She was so fragile and brittle right now, he was afraid she'd break.
He felt her begin to shake and held her closer as sobs began to wrack her. "It's over," he said awkwardly, pulling her head down onto his shoulder.
"Just tell me you still love me," she wept. "That you don't hate me. I need to hear you say it, even if it's a lie!"
"Gods, no!" He was shocked she could even think that. "How could I ever hate you?" He turned her tear-soaked face to his. "I love you, Carrie. You're my life." He touched his lips to hers, meaning it to be only a gentle kiss, but she returned it frantically, her hands reaching for his face, twining themselves in his long hair. Her mental barriers broke then, and he felt her fear of his rejection, the beginnings of self-loathing that she'd let this happen to her.
It wasn't your fault,
he sent.
How could you have stopped him? He's physically stronger even than us. And how could I ever reject you because of it? You mustn't blame or hate yourself.
He broke the kiss then, climbing into the bed beside her.
She leaned against him, rubbing her eyes as the sobs began to diminish. "Just hold me," she whispered, wrapping her arms around his chest. "I need to feel you close. I don't want to be alone."
He did, holding her close even when she drifted off to sleep, remembering the first time he'd held her, pregnant and sobbing then with fear of the alien cub she carried. A short time later, she'd woken with a cry of horror at the first of the nightmares.
Reaching out, he gently touched the skin around the livid bruises on her side. Anger filled him, and a desire to rip J'koshuk limb from limb with his bare hands. His mind was suddenly made up. If they were all here this morning, they were leaving.
She stirred, turning round till she faced him. "We have to find Kusac first," she said, opening her eyes and looking up at him. "I felt him, Tallinu. Felt his mind and yours when I used the gestalt."
"He's not here, Carrie," he said in Highland, stroking her face. "They only found you."
"They lied about me, they're lying about Kusac. I smelled his scent on J'koshuk."
"I didn't feel him, Dzinae," he said gently. "As for his scent, the mind can play funny tricks on you at times like that. I know."
A puzzled look crossed her face, followed by one of understanding. "Oh, no, not you," she said, catching hold of his hand. "Yet you still sent your child-self forward to our time. How could you do it, knowing what you faced?"
"It happens," he said. "I did it because I knew the future held you. Memories of what we'd share made me stronger, helped me survive those years."
"Like you've helped me so many times," she said, kissing his fingers. "But I did sense Kusac. He's here and he's alive. I know he's not dead."
"I felt your mind when they woke you, Carrie. I'd have felt him, too. How could you and I be Leska Linked if he was alive and out of cryo?"
She closed her eyes, leaning her forehead against his chest. "I don't know. Maybe we Linked because you were there and he wasn't."
"We can't stay here any longer, Carrie. They keep taking us, in pairs, when we're asleep. Jo's pregnant, you are, and Kate will be soon, if she isn't already. We have to go now before they separate us again."
"You think they're breeding us? Why? Why would they want to do that?"
"You know why. They've been studying our Talent. Giyesh heard them saying they implanted the Valtegans from M'ezozakk's crew to make them more docile. Think what a troop of tame telepaths could do for them. I won't live in slavery, Carrie, and I don't want our child born into it." He tried not to sound forceful, but he was determined that they wouldn't remain any longer. "We've got to get home and warn them."
"You and Tirak are prepared to have us die rather than live in captivity, aren't you?"
"Do you want to live here and have your mind controlled and your body abused again?" This time he was being almost brutal. He had to make her realize that remaining wasn't an option.
"But he's here," she whispered, clutching the long fur on his chest. "We can't leave without him!"
"Then you'll have to choose, Carrie," he said, his voice becoming tight. "Are you willing to risk your life, our cub's, and mine, on the faint chance that Kusac is on this vessel? What about Kashini and your fears she's in danger? More people than Kusac depend on you right now. If you stay, then I've no choice but to remain. If that happens, the others probably won't make it, and Shola itself will be in danger."
"That's not fair, Tallinu." Her eyes began to fill with tears.
"What you're doing isn't fair," he said, holding her closer. "You're working on emotions here, not logic. You know how much I love Kusac. Gods, if I believed he was here, I'd do my utmost to find him!"
She was silent for a minute, remembering Khuushoi's warning. "I don't have a choice. I'll go with you," she said quietly.
"Remember Winter's kiss,"
whispered Kaid, sharing her memory. "When they woke you the second time, I heard that in my mind. Vartra told me the Entities couldn't come this far from Shola."
"Khuushoi said it was because I was in Her realm." She shivered.
"I know how afraid of cryo you are, but we had no choice," said Kaid, wrapping himself and the covers round her to warm her. "You would have died of your wounds before we could reach the rendezvous."
"I'm not afraid of it, exactly. It's because I'm aware when I shouldn't be. My mind was still functioning on some strange level. At one point it was as if I was floating over Shola. That's when I saw the danger to Kashini."
"The greenness creeping toward the estate."
"I've seen that green before. It was a sharp, bright color, like the la'quo resin. And like J'koshuk's skin," she said slowly, "when he touched me."
"Why green? It isn't the color of danger, unless..."
"Unless it's to do with the Valtegans," finished Carrie, pushing him back to see his face clearly. "Kezule. He's the threat."
"How? He's at Shanagi, under the tightest security."
"He's gotten out, I know he has!"
"That's impossible," he said. "And even if he had, why would he head for the estate? He'd be more likely to go for the spaceport and try to get off Shola."
"No, he'd want to go back to his own time. He'd head for us, not knowing we're off-world."
He could feel the rising hysteria in her mind. "Enough Carrie. He doesn't know where we live."
"If he escaped, he could easily find out! When he finds we're missing, he's going to take Kashini! We've got to get back, Tallinu! Now! That's the choice Khuushoi meant!" She tried to push him aside in an effort to get up from the bed but he held her tight, preventing her.
"No. Calm down," he said firmly. "You're overreacting. First, we're leaving today, remember? I was the one persuading you of that. Second, if you're not calm and focused on what we're doing, it'll affect me and we'll fail. I'm dependent on you now, Carrie. I can't do my job if you're there, in my mind, panicking. Remember what you are, a Sister in the Brotherhood. Don't let me down."
He felt her stop and face the fear. As it began to recede, she nodded slowly. "You're right. We've one chance. Worrying about what's happening back home won't get us there any sooner."
He stroked her cheek, wondering if they'd see another night together. Now came the really hard part. "We've planned this escape during the weeks we've been here. I need to include you now, tell you what to do. We work well with the U'Churians, but when it comes to this, I know I can rely on you and T'Chebbi. We've got to get at least one person off this ship. If the rest of us don't make it, we have to survive long enough to kill our own people. There's another Leska pair, Kate and Taynar, and Rezac's formed a Triad with Jo. We only need to kill one of each group and the others will die. Same with us." He waited, hoping that she'd be strong enough to know this had to be faced and discussed.
"I'll make sure I dodge the enemy better this time," she said with a lopsided grin. "Don't let anyone else but you— do it— if the time comes."
"I won't," he said, gripping her tightly and kissing her, letting her feel how much he needed and loved her, and prayed they'd survive.