Dear Adam (34 page)

Subject: Re: Hi!

Hey

I’m sorry, I can’t this weekend. Made plans
and I’m volunteering at Dante’s school.

How about February? I won’t be so busy
then.

I miss you too.

Eden

----------

Friday, January 31 12:15 AM

Fr: Eden Espinoza

To: Eden Espinoza

Dear Adam,

It's here in my throat - strangling me.

I'm missing you so much.

Eden

----------

Friday, February 14 3:36 AM

Fr: Eden Espinoza

To: Eden Espinoza

Dear Adam,

I wonder where you are now, who you're with,
what you're doing. Do you think of me? Do you ache like I do?

I suppose you've put me away for good. That
you've found someone else to court, someone else to send you to
sleep, wake you up, fuss over you, worry over you.

The days are speeding by so fast. If it
hasn't already, our time together will seem like a distant dream.
You'll wonder if you ever knew me. You won't look back, intent on
moving forward.

I have all these crazy ideas. I'd say, Meet
me. Now. Anywhere you like. I'll go wherever you are. I'd say -
Please come home, Adam.

And you would.

Eden

----------

Friday, February 23 3:59 AM

Fr: Eden Espinoza

To: Eden Espinoza

Dear Adam,

Sometimes when I think about you, I can't
breathe. Like right now.

Eden

----------

Friday, February 23 4:16 AM

Fr: Eden Espinoza

To:
Adam -

Dear Adam,

How are you? Whatever you might think, I do
care about what happens to you. I don’t feel right about how it
ended between us. I should have let you defend yourself.

I'm ready to listen if you have anything to
say to me.

Eden

----------

Friday, February 23 4:18 AM

From: "MAILER-NO [email protected]" [email protected]>

To: Eden Espinoza

Subject: FAILURE NOTICE

Sorry, we were unable to
deliver your message to the following address:
, as it is an account that is no
longer in service.

Chapter 17

“
You look amazing! Spending
two weeks in the Caribbean agrees with you, Viv!” Eden gave a
Vivian a warm hug. “Love your tan.”

“
I’m so glad to see you, E.
You’re more reclusive than J.D. Salinger!”

They both sat down and ordered drinks. When
the waiter left with their orders, Vivian gave her a lingering
glance, a slight frown creasing her forehead even though she was
smiling.

“
I feel like I haven’t seen
you in ages.”

“
Oh, you know me.” Eden
affected a lighthearted tone. “I’m just a little hermit
nowadays.”

“
For awhile there, I
thought you were avoiding me.” Vivian had her hands steepled on the
table as she searched Eden’s face.

Eden lowered her eyes.

“
No, I wasn’t. I’ve just
been busy with projects. Consumed.”

Vivian raised an eyebrow.

“
Consumed?”

Eden took a deep breath. She took her phone
out of her purse and unlocked it.

“
Wow, that’s different! It
reads your thumbprint?”

Eden made a sound of annoyance. “It is such a
freaking pain. A-” She was about to say “Adam had me install it”
but stopped herself in time. She swallowed the pebble in her throat
and continued. “It’s just a stupid program or something that I
can’t get rid of.”

“
You can’t delete the
app?”

“
It’s not an app.” Eden
waved her hand in the air dismissively. “Too long of a story. I’m
sorry I ever installed it. Anyway.”

She pushed the phone across the table. Vivian
picked it up and looked at the link that Eden had clicked on.

“
League of Librarians Part
I
by E.A. Valfiero?” Vivian read with a
confused expression. “You want me to read this book?”

“
That would be wonderful.
Because I wrote it.”

“
Shut up!”

Eden grinned, vigorously nodding her
head.

Vivian’s shriek startled the nearby diners,
who gawked at them as they did a mad dance of hugs and tears. They
grabbed their drinks from the waiter when he came around and did
jubilant toasts.

“
This is really you?”
Vivian was still in the thick of surprise.

“
That’s what I’ve been
working on. I hired an editor, got it in shape, and now all three
books in the series are out in the wild!”

“
I am buying all of them
right now.” Vivian took her phone out and clicked on it several
times. “There. I’m now the owner of an E.A. Valfiero set.
Woo-hoo!”

“
You’ll be one of four
owners! Yay!”

They clinked martini glasses and downed their
cosmopolitans.

“
You did it, you finally
did it. I’m so proud of you!”

“
You can’t tell anybody
though. I want my pseudonym to remain a secret. I don’t want it to
ever be traced back to me.”

Vivian gaped at her.

“
You’re the only one who
knows. I just want to keep my private life and writing life
separate.”

Vivian looked like she was about to cry. “You
only told me?”

“
Yeah. You’ve always
encouraged me to write so of course I had to tell you!”

“
Oh, E.” Vivian got up and
gave Eden another warm hug. “Thank you.”

Vivian wiped a tear from the corner of her
eye. “I was beginning to worry about you, actually. I’m glad I was
wrong.”

“
You don’t need to worry
about me. I’m fine.” Eden smiled at her friend. “Here’s our food!”
she exclaimed with relief when the waiter approached them with
their orders.

Over dinner, Vivian regaled Eden with tales
of her travels. Eden told her about Dante's plan to move out during
summer to live with his dad so he could be closer to his college.
"I'll probably get a bunch of cats or something," she joked, trying
to keep a brave face.

They also talked about the latest news. Eden
was surprised to find out that Regine was dating again and had
finally found someone who treated her right.

“
Not only that,” Vivian
said with a laugh, “He’s real!”

Eden laughed too, but it was forced. She
tried to steer the conversation away from boyfriends and lovers,
but Vivian was not to be deterred.

“
You still haven’t told me
about Adam,” she said as they sipped their coffee.

Eden stared down at her coffee cup for a
quiet moment, then took a deep breath. When she looked up, she gave
her concerned friend a weak smile.

“
I don’t know how to tell
you this,” she began.

“
So that’s why you changed
your phone number and deleted your blog,” Vivian remarked an hour
later. “I was really concerned, but when you told me about the
books, I thought that maybe that was the reason, because you were
finally concentrating on your writing.”

“
By default,” Eden said.
She wiped the tears from her cheeks with a tissue. “I swore I
wouldn’t break down when I told you.”

“
Cry all you want. Hell,
I’m crying with you!” Vivian sniffed. “And you haven’t talked to
him since?”

Eden shook her head. “I finally gave in and
e-mailed him, but his e-mail account was shut down. So was his
Skype account. And then I tried calling the phone number he had
given me and that didn’t work either. It’s like he disappeared, but
not.”

Vivian gave her a questioning glance.

“
I still feel him,” Eden
said. She swept the air all around them. “Everywhere. His presence
is so strong, almost as strong as when we were
together.”

"What if he's someone you know or met
already, only he was too shy to tell you?"

Eden sighed. "I've looked at it from every
point of view, considered every possibility." She gave a small
laugh. "I even went around my office, feeling out every guy, trying
to see if there were any signs they might be Adam. But I know in my
heart that's not it. His voice, his personality. Everything about
him is too unique. No one can even come close."

Vivian pursed her lips and tapped a finger on
the table. Her brow was furrowed as if she was concentrating on
something.

“
What?”

“
I’m going to put this out
there and you can shoot it down if you want,” Vivian said with
reluctance, “But what if everything he said was true?”

Eden gaped at her friend in surprise. Out of
all the things she expected worldly Vivian to say, this was not one
of them.

“
Viv, he catfished
me.”

“
It would seem so. But
there’s something about the fact that he insisted on not giving you
a picture. He could have deceived you by representing himself as
this gorgeous guy, but he didn’t. It was like he wanted you to fall
in love with the real him.” Vivian tapped her finger on the table
to emphasize her point. “I think he’s deformed.”

“
I thought of that,” Eden
conceded. “I told him over and over again how I didn’t care how he
looked. All I cared about was him. You know me.”

Vivian widened her eyes comically. “Um-hm.
You don’t care about looks, your winner of an ex-husband being a
prime example. Thank god Dante doesn’t resemble him in looks or
personality.”

Eden looked around the restaurant. She
inclined her head toward an obese older man sitting with his wife
at a corner table. “Adam could be overweight, bald, whatever.” She
stared so hard at the man that his wife began to look alarmed. Eden
looked away, embarrassed. “I don’t care.”

“
So let’s just say all of a
sudden, he sent you an e-mail or text asking to get back together,
how would you feel?”

Eden couldn’t stop the wave of heartsick
longing that overwhelmed her just then. She cast her eyes down
without saying anything.

“
Oh, Eden, honey, you have
to do something.”

Saturday, May 10 15:45

Fr: Michael Stubbins

To: Eden Espinoza

Subject: ADAM CARTER; Case no.
134-X53-AC1

Ms. Espinoza:

After an extensive search of UK records and
field investigation, I have found a viable match for the
above-named subject you have directed our office to search for.
Using the date of birth, name, physical descriptors, and other
possible identifying information you provided, I was able to locate
two records which appear to closely match this subject.

At your direction, I began my search in
Liverpool and surrounding environs. You stated that this individual
might have an extensive criminal record; however, I only found one
arrest. I have attached a detailed report of the incident to this
e-mail (labeled “Adam Carter 1”) for your complete perusal. To
summarise, at the age of 16, an Adam Carter was arrested for the
attempted murder of William J. Hough, age 23. Adam Carter claimed
that Hough had brutally beaten his (Adam Carter’s) 16-year-old
ex-girlfriend because she was pregnant with Hough’s child and Hough
wanted the pregnancy terminated. Hough was hospitalised with a
broken jaw and severe head injuries. The charges against Adam
Carter were dropped when Adam Carter’s grandfather, Charles Carter,
intervened and persuaded the local magistrate to release his
grandson. As a result of being beaten, Adam Carter’s ex-girlfriend
miscarried and subsequently attempted an unsuccessful suicide.