Deceived (5 page)

Her cheek lifted in half a smile. “You know I’ve been here for years, but I’m still the odd one out. I never leave the academy. Not unless the school closes. I don’t run home on weekends and short holidays. My family makes itself scarce, so it’s nice having a friend who gets how that feels.”

I nodded. She nodded. It looked to me like Pixie had hundreds of friends. I let her words sit, unsure of how to respond. My dad wasn’t around because he couldn’t be, but I didn’t point that out. I finished my seared-cheese sandwich and went to brush my teeth. She followed me. No boundaries.

“Let’s go out!” She was going out with or without me. Her social calendar overflowed. Unlike mine.

“I’m going to the library. I missed a ton today after I saw Brian.” I shrugged one shoulder and gave the palms up, head tilt.
What can I do? Out of my hands.
I hated the hold he had on me.

“Ack.” She spit an exasperated throat noise at me and rolled her head around.

She planned to fix me. I wished her luck. When she left to meet friends back at the Community Center, I grabbed my laptop and backpack to walk with her. Pixie loved darts and was pretty good.

I flipped the deadbolt and checked the doorknob on our way back out.

“Good. I was going to tell you to make sure it’s locked this time.” Pixie tossed the stick of her Blow Pop into a trash bin as we reached the sidewalk.

“What do you mean? I always double-check.”

“Not always. When I put my key in after school, it was already unlocked.”

“Why didn’t you say anything?” My head pounded with thoughts I couldn’t voice. Images from my dream mixed with serial-killer rumors and hot boys appearing at school. My head swiveled left and right. I rubbed my neck to ease the electricity running up and down my spine.

“I was on the phone.” She rolled her eyes. “It’s no big deal. You were in a hurry. I still can’t believe you made it here and back so fast. Impressive.”

“What?”

“From Buzz Cup this morning. You came back for something.” She rotated her wrist, signaling for me to keep up.

“Right. I must’ve forgotten to lock it after I ran home.” I took one last look at the apartment over my shoulder before it disappeared into the distance. My cheeks burned with fear and humiliation. I should’ve told her the truth. Then I could tell her what I knew. I hadn’t left the door unlocked. I’d never gone home. Someone else had unlocked the door.

Pixie chattered and texted the rest of the way until we parted. I didn’t tell her. I went as far as the edge of campus and then headed to the library. There was an obvious reason she thought the door had been unlocked. She’d been on the phone, distracted. It had been locked. She was confused.

Inside the library, I read through every syllabus and outlined the papers due at semester’s end. I had a solid start, which would help me secure the grades I needed. I had to stay on top of things and be focused. No more being “that” girl. So what? Some gorgeous guy entered my life and I fell apart? No. No more. Same with the dream. Goodbye.

I breathed easier inside the library. Libraries were consistent. The high wooden shelving around me showed its age. I could’ve been in a nineteenth-century museum if it weren’t for the rows of new releases near the front desk. A man seated against the wall looked me over. I didn’t recognize him from any of my classes or the hallways, but it was only my first day. He watched me, staring. I blushed. So many unusual things had transpired in one short day. I probably looked a little unstable. I chanced one last look, and he smiled. Perhaps he taught a class I didn’t have this semester. Judging by his tidy appearance and approximate age, it seemed reasonable. Before he could decide to approach me, I turned back to my table.

I stayed at the library longer than I needed. My mind kept replaying Pixie’s allegation that Brian had followed me, and her belief that our door had been unlocked when I remembered double-checking it. Memories of the blue bike before school and the hint of it afterward were stuck in my brain.
Don’t dwell.
Usually my first day at a new school was uneventful. No one talked to me, and I wondered when they would. Life at Francine Frances was different; the whole town was different from anywhere I’d ever been. Everyone knew each other. They lived here. No parents. For the first time since Dad had agreed to let me go away for senior year, the concept dug in tight. No parents. No Dad at home. Ever. Suddenly, all I wanted in the world was to go back to my room and give him a call.

“Homework on the first day?” The man stood smiling on the other side of my table.

“Uh, yeah, some.”

“Anything I can do to help?” He tilted his head. The simple act ran goose bumps over my skin.

“No.”
Calm down. It’s not like he’s a serial killer.

“I’ll be around if you need me.” He whistled his way back to where he sat.

I exhaled and pulled my bag onto my lap. The zipper on my backpack caught on the corner of an oversized text. I started unpacking to reorganize. The black ribbon, frayed and tangled, was caught by a thread in the zipper’s teeth. Perhaps the ribbon belonged to a classmate, but when I looked at it, all I could think of was my mom. My throat thickened until I couldn’t swallow. I ran my fingertips over the surface, fluffed the frayed edge with my thumb and forefinger, and imagined Mom tying the ribbon in her hair. After she died, Dad used to pull out her hair ribbons every year or so, take his grief to a new level, and then we moved. By the time I turned eleven, I knew what it meant when I saw the black ribbons appear: Dad would want to start over, run from what chased him. The more I thought about the ribbons, the more it scared me.

I’d had enough library time.

“Good night,” the man said as I passed him on my way out. I waved.

On the walk home, my nerves were frayed worse than the ribbon. My skin snapped with anxiety. Walking through the grounds, there was a firefly near the bushes. The night air chilled my skin, and I hastened my pace. Fireflies didn’t last long in September. Before I reached the main strip of apartments and shops, there was another small light. A silhouette of black against an already lonesome night. The sun had set behind the hills when I left the library, and the darkness gained momentum. The moon and stars hid behind a vast mask of gray clouds. Streetlamps cast shadows from the cones of light. The streets were quiet and the campus still.

My footsteps cracked in the night, and I cursed my choice of sandals over sneakers. Flip, flip, flip, flip. Soon my steps came faster. Flip, flip, flip, flip. Speeding up without intent and making me more nervous. Something was wrong. Nothing was wrong. Everything was wrong.

The chill in the night air set my teeth chattering. Tension mounted, and I wrapped my arms across my chest instinctively. I tried to move faster. Blood whooshed between my ears, accompanied by my heavy breathing. A few fallen leaves rustled against the pavement. A twig cracked nearby, and bile rose in my throat. The slow thump of heavy footfalls reached my ears. I couldn’t swallow anymore. For a moment I wondered if I’d ever see the coffee shop.

The desolation of the street was as frightening as the footsteps behind me. There were no sounds other than the hastening feet. My eyes darted around, making the dark walk seem more dangerous, but I couldn’t stop myself. I saw nothing, just a few leaves and darkened houses.

When the light of the coffee shop window finally came into view, my heart sprinted, pulling me forward like the dash at the end of a long-distance run. My face burned. This was how it began in my dream. I didn’t see what was coming. I simply knew it was there. I suddenly felt like a target, unguarded and without defense.

I reached the sidewalk and threw myself toward the building. Only a few cobblestone stairs separated me from safety. I bounded up, taking them two at a time. Pulling open the door was like reaching a refuge. Warmth comingled with scents of cocoa beans, setting my mind at ease. Physically, though, was another story.

My muscles trembled as I removed my backpack from my shoulder and concentrated on breathing. There was a way to quicken the calm. Breathe in through my mouth and out through my nose, or was it in through my nose and out through my mouth? My brain hurt. I settled on the latter because it allowed me to draw in the aromas of cocoa, vanilla, and cinnamon that encircled my head. Sugar and coffee seasoned the air. It was impossible to be afraid any longer, but it would take time to shake the adrenaline.

I collapsed into the nearest booth for several minutes before I could stand. My heartbeat was audible, and tears stung my eyes. No one seemed to notice. I wobbled to the restroom and dashed my hot face with cold water.

Shake it off, Gabriella. Shake it off
. I lived in a town with a volunteer police department. Abductions didn’t happen here. This odd, antiquated town probably had a neighborhood-watch group at every corner. I was fine. I was losing it, but I was fine. I dried my face with renewed purpose, as if I could somehow remove the panic with the water. Then I made my way to the counter for a vat of coffee.

Brian was seated at a corner table. He didn’t look up. I ordered their largest soy vanilla latte to go but couldn’t bring myself to leave. Instead, I sat down, defeated, pondering what was happening to me. I hated being afraid. This was the year I had vowed to beat this thing, not be drawn in deeper. I had promised myself a fresh start. I had come to Francine Frances with a plan. First, find out what the heck I had been dreaming about for the past twelve years. Then squash it. Instead, the dream had become reality, like in a Freddy Krueger movie.

I was stuck. I couldn’t get myself to leave the coffee shop. Logically, I recognized the silliness, but my feet planted me in the booth, unwilling to move. I was living my dream, trapped, afraid to go and afraid to stay. My dream, being ever present with me, had become as real as the seat I sat on. More than a dream, this subconscious thing now affected my real life and real decisions. Maybe Krueger fit the scenario better than I thought.

Holding my phone, I pretended to text while I decided what to do. After deliberating through most of my latte, I called Pixie for a ride.

Brian watched me from his corner table without approaching, thank goodness. I prayed he hadn’t seen my grand entrance. He needed to stay put until I got my head together. I didn’t need another awkward situation on top of the one I was in the middle of. It crossed my mind that he’d followed me. I couldn’t be sure who had arrived first, but the idea that he might be following me sent goose bumps up my arms.

“You make quite an entrance.”

I slapped my chest with one hand and gasped. I hadn’t seen him get up. My face burned in response. I should’ve known he’d walk over eventually.

“Yeah.” I had no idea how to respond.
Well, you see, handsome boy, I was running from a figment of my imagination …
I closed my eyes to shut out the crazy and get my thoughts in order and then opened them again.

“Is everything okay?” He glanced around, probably checking to be sure no one saw us together. Not what I needed at the moment.

I tried not to look at him. Maybe he hadn’t noticed that I was having a mental breakdown. He made it hard enough for me to think when I wasn’t mid-freakout. His warm smile gave me pause. I bet Brian never feared anything. Never ran from his shadow. Didn’t fear the dark. My eyes ran to the window beside me in remembrance. Outside, a tiny orange glow near a thick oak tree drew my eye. It reminded me of a firefly whose light lasted way too long. Then it fell and disappeared.

Brian looked outside, but only darkness stared back. I’d no sooner perceived the glow than it was gone. Only our reflections and the shine of the interior lights against the glass remained. My naturally wide eyes looked like saucers after the scare I’d had, especially compared to the narrow set of Brian’s.

“I’m fine. Just in a hurry to get some coffee.” I tipped my cup his way.

“At 9:00 at night.” A cynical statement. “How do you sleep?”

“I don’t.” I answered honestly before I thought it through.

“You don’t.” His eyes pinched at the sides, and he sat in the chair next to mine without an invitation.

I had mentioned that I never slept when we talked at the flea market. Maybe he thought I had a fun or youthful reason. I didn’t.

The coffee shop door sucked open, and I jumped in my seat. Brian followed my startled gaze. Davis ambled in. He looked at us for a long, drawn-out beat before regaining his pace to the counter. Brian continued to examine him, and Davis stole a look in our direction while waiting for his coffee. Not a friendly how-do-you-do by any stretch.

“Do you need a ride home?” Brian shifted in his chair.

My already upset stomach twisted further.

He looked torn, as if he wished he hadn’t offered. His behavior today had sucked on the whole. Transferring to half my classes so he could ignore me made zero sense. Of course, in a small school like ours, it could be coincidence. The look he had given me outside of English came to mind and irked me.

“No. No thanks.” I forced my mouth to betray me. Mad or not, I wouldn’t mind accepting his offer. Climbing on the back of his bike and wrapping my arms around him would be a great start to a brand new me. Braver. More fun. Less spazzy. “My roommate’s picking me up. It’s fine. I’m good, really.”
Liar
.

“If you’re certain.” He stood and moved back to his table but not before giving me a look that sent electricity spiraling right through to my sandals. From the moment we met, he’d been speaking to me on some other, unseen level, and it killed me. Wanting something so far out of my reach was torturous. My toes curled under the table.

Having a crush was highly underrated. The rush alone made the inevitable heartbreak worthwhile. When he turned, I couldn’t resist watching him walk away. In my opinion, his existence was a bona fide phenomenon. How someone like him even existed was beyond me. Regardless of how, I was thankful for the new direction my thoughts had taken.

As much as I hated to leave the coffee shop for a second reason now, I was thrilled when Pixie pulled up.