Delay of Game (The Baltimore Banners Book 6) (17 page)

Silence. Not the quiet of emptiness, but more like a stillness. Val stood in the entranceway of her apartment, the keys still in her hand, her large tote still slung over her shoulder. Not moving, not doing anything except listening.

The apartment should be flooded with light but it wasn't. The patio curtains were drawn, letting in just a sliver of the afternoon sun. The lights were turned off, as they had been when she'd left.

Val looked around, studying the furnishings and décor like she was seeing them for the first time. She'd always thought her place was bright and welcoming, with the overstuffed sofa and matching chairs upholstered in pastel greens and creams. The light oak end tables and matching coffee table. The area rug with bold splashes of color. Even the prints on the wall and the few plants. Everything had been decorated with color in mind. Bright, airy, welcoming.

But looking at it now, in the shadows of the late afternoon, everything looked…lonely. She'd never seen it this way before, had never really been home at this time of day. Except for the last few weeks, with Justin. But the curtains had been opened to welcome in the light, staying that way until she went to bed. Not like now, when she'd drawn the curtains last night and never bothered to open them before she left this morning.

She'd never noticed, because she'd always been so busy. Leaving by nine in the morning and more often than not, getting home after nine at night. Her refuge had become nothing more than a place to sleep, and somehow she'd stopped noticing.

Even during the last few weeks, when she'd actually been here. She hadn't really noticed, not consciously at least, because she'd been so focused on Justin. But seeing it now, she could see the contrast, feel the difference.

Val rolled her eyes and tossed the keys onto the small table near the entranceway. "Get a grip, Val. You're losing it."

And she was. She had no idea where her mind was lately, why she was suddenly so out of sorts. It was like she was disconnected somehow. Like her reality had shifted and she wasn't sure why.

And she wasn't sure how to feel about it, either.

She dropped the bag onto the sofa, wondering when it had become so heavy, and kept walking, heading toward the bedroom. She stopped in the doorway, not surprised to see Justin sleeping. What did surprise her was the sudden hitch in her chest, a tightening that left her momentarily breathless.

Justin was sleeping on his back, bare chested, the broken arm propped on a pillow draped across his midsection. The light throw she usually kept at the foot of the bed was draped over him, low around his waist, one bare foot uncovered and hanging slightly off the edge of the bed. His head was turned toward her, his face relaxed in sleep. And he looked peaceful, at ease. Like whatever tension and stress that had been plaguing him for the last few weeks had finally left him, at least in sleep.

She studied his face, the sharp angles of his cheekbones, the imperfect line of his nose, the full lips, soft and slightly parted. His dark blonde hair, tousled, curling around his ear. The darker hair of his beard that hid the lines of his jaw. She smiled, knowing he wouldn't shave until the Banners finished playing, win or lose.

Her gaze drifted down to his chest, to the line of hard muscles and light sprinkling of hair in the center, to the exquisitely drawn eagle tattoo. Justin reminded her a little of the majestic bird: masculine and rugged and strong but still beautiful. Graceful.

Val smiled again and shook her head, wondering what had gotten into her, to be staring at Justin like this while he slept. She turned and her foot hit something, knocking it away. Frowning, she bent down and picked it up, then stared at in confusion for a few seconds.

Well, at least now she knew why Justin hadn't been answering his phone. But why would he have thrown it? There was no doubt in her mind that's what happened, not with the damage to it.

She picked up the other pieces and gathered them in one hand, moving to place them on the dresser. Curiosity was tearing at her but she wouldn't ask, not even after Justin woke up. It wasn't her business, no matter how much she wanted to know.

"Hey." The soft voice startled Val and she dropped the pieces on the dresser. Pressing her hand to her chest, she turned to face Justin, her heart jumping again at the sleepy smile sent her way.

"Sorry. I didn't mean to wake you up."

"You didn't." Justin watched her for a few seconds, his dark eyes smoldering beneath half-closed lids. He patted the bed next to him in invitation. "Come here."

Val paused, but for only the space of a single heartbeat. She walked to the other side of the bed, toed off her heels, then climbed in next to him, shifting until she was stretched out beside him. She pressed a kiss to his chest, his skin hard and warm beneath her lips, then propped her head in her hand and smiled down at him.

"How are you feeling?"

Justin paused, frowning, then grinned, the small half-smile deepening the dimple in his cheek and causing her heart to skip a beat. "Not too bad. I think I actually got some real sleep." He stretched out with a small groan, his skin pulling even tighter over hard muscle, then ran his hand over her arm. "What time is it?"

"Not quite five."

A frown creased his face, his brows drawing together. "Five? I thought you were working all night. Is everything okay?"

Val shrugged, then gave him a small smile. "Everything's fine. I guess I just wanted to be here instead, in case you needed anything."

Justin pushed up on his good arm, shifting until he was almost sitting. She could see concern in his eyes, and maybe a little worry when he watched her. "Val, I'm fine. I don't want you to miss work to take care of me, not when you've already done so much. I'll be okay. You don't need to be here."

"I know I don't need to. I want to. There's a difference."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah." Val tried to keep her voice light and teasing, but the word came out too quietly, filled with more truth than she was ready to admit.

Justin watched her for a long time, the minutes drifting by in silence. It seemed like a hundred different thoughts and emotions flashed in his eyes, one after the other, so fast that Val couldn't read any of them. She wondered if maybe she should have just stayed quiet. Or maybe she should have stayed at work. Would Justin worry that she was too attached? Or that she didn't trust him? Or worse, maybe he thought she was hovering too much. She started to sit up, to roll away and off the bed, when he reached for her.

His hand cupped her cheek, his palm warm and just a little rough against her skin. But his touch was gentle, the caress of his thumb against her lower lip feather light. He leaned forward and pressed his mouth against hers, the kiss soft and sweet, lingering. She leaned into him, her hand flat against his chest, sighing when his tongue eased between her lips and danced with hers. Warmth changed to heat, pooling deep inside and radiating out, filling her with need. Yet the kiss remained slow, gentle. Like Justin had all the time in the world, just for her. To taste, to linger, to please.

Val sighed when he pulled away, her eyes still closed, her heart racing. When she finally opened her eyes, it was to see Justin watching her, his own eyes searching hers, his gaze warm and soft. He ran his thumb along her lip once more then leaned back, a grin tilting one corner of his mouth.

"I could kiss you all night long."

"I won't stop you." And oh God, could she sound any easier? Any more desperate? Justin chuckled and kissed her again, this one too short, too quick.

"Good. How about we do that after dinner then?"

Val smiled, some of the irrational worry leaving her. "Sounds good to me." She rolled to her side and pushed herself off the bed, smoothing her slacks as she stood. "What do you want? I can thaw some chicken, or we can have pasta—"

"No." Justin swung his legs over the side of the bed, wincing only a little when he finally stood. "We're going out to eat."

"Justin, are you sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure." He walked over to her and wrapped his good arm around her waist, pulling her close. "I've been cooped up too long. We're going out. Some place nice, not a pizza joint."

"And what's wrong with pizza?"

"Nothing. We can do pizza another night. But tonight, we're going someplace nicer. Not suit nice, since I don't have one here. I'll have to think." He kissed her, hard and quick, then stepped back. "Besides, I need to get a new phone."

"Uh, yeah." Val glanced at the pieces on the dresser. "I noticed that."

A shadow crossed Justin's face, a brief one as he stared at the remains of his phone. He blinked, and the shadow disappeared. Then his gaze slid to hers, thoughtful but a little uncertain. Val got the feeling he was struggling with whether or not to explain what happened with the phone. His eyes drifted to hers, back to the phone, and finally down to the floor. He shifted his weight and ran a hand through his hair, tousling it even more.

"I need to go home next week."

The words hung in the air between them, not making any sense at first. Then something tightened in her chest, knocking the breath from her and leaving a hollowness deep inside. The reaction was silly. Stupid. Of course she'd known he would have to go home, he didn't really live here.

Then why did it suddenly feel like he was telling her he was moving out? Because she had become used to having him here, that was why. She had become too accustomed to falling asleep in his arms, to waking to his sleepy grin each morning. She was too attached. Val never got attached. She didn't have time.

She nodded and tried to smile, the expression too forced. Maybe it was good that he was going back home, good that he was putting space between them. Maybe then she could get her head back on straight and figure out what she wanted.

She forced her smile wider and finally looked at Justin. "Oh. Sure, I understand. You'll probably be more comfortable at your place, with all your things and everything. It'll probably help you recover and—"

"Val, no." Justin wrapped his arm around her waist and pulled her close, his eyes catching hers, holding her still. "I don't mean back to my place. Unless—if you're getting tired of me then yeah, I can go back there—"

"No!" The word came out too fast, too desperate. Val looked away and cleared her throat, then shrugged, trying to act like it wasn't a big deal. "You can stay here. If you want."

"Good." He pressed a quick kiss against her mouth and grinned. "When I said I needed to go home, I meant to my dad's. For a visit."

"Oh." She was such an idiot. What must Justin think, after she'd pretty much let him know she didn't want him to leave? Maybe he didn't think anything of it. Or, if the look in his eyes meant anything, maybe he liked the idea, too.

She really needed to figure out what was going on, figure out what she wanted. Maybe Justin being gone would help with that. Give them each some time away from the other, put a little distance between them so she could look at things objectively.

Yeah. That's why her stomach was twisting and a heaviness was settling in her chest. When had she become such a fool? And when had she started lying to herself? She didn't need time to figure things out. No, what she needed was to face reality and finally admit to herself what her heart already knew.

No. Not yet. It was too soon.

"If you don't want to, that's fine too."

Val blinked, her eyes focusing on Justin, on the expectant look on his face. She had been zoning out, arguing with herself, and completely missed whatever Justin had just said. "I'm sorry, what?"

"I was just wondering if you wanted to go with me. It would only be for a week, I can't handle being home longer than that. But if you don't want to, I understand. I mean, you'd have to take off work and I know you don't like being gone from the restaurant that long."

Justin was asking her to go home with him. Val blinked, repeating the words in her mind, making sure she didn't misunderstand. No, he really did ask her. And he was giving her an easy out, an easy way to say no if she didn't want to go. A week away from the restaurant. She'd never been gone for that long. It was probably too long, too much time away. She should probably say no, probably latch on to the excuse he was handing her and tell him she couldn't just leave for a week.

Maybe that was what she should do. But it wasn't what she wanted to do. Justin was inviting her to go home with him and she got the impression this was important. A big deal. Not just for him, but for her too. And she wanted to go.

"I'd love to."

Justin leaned back, his eyes widening just a little bit, as if he couldn't believe she'd said yes. "Really?"

"Yes, really. It'll be fun. A nice little break." Val wrapped her arms around his waist, careful of his arm, and pressed a kiss at the base of his throat.

"I'm not sure 'fun' is how I'd describe it but it'll definitely be better with you there."

"Good, it's all settled." Val stepped out of his hold then paused, frowning. "Um, where exactly is home, anyway?"

Justin grinned, his eyes lighting with amusement, and she wondered if maybe she should have asked him that question first, before agreeing to go with him. It wasn't anywhere in Canada, she knew that much. Maybe it was some place exciting, like New York. Or Key West. Or San Diego. That would definitely be a bonus.