Deliver Us (37 page)

“Who’s ready to eat?” he grins, seeing the easiness of Darrek’s smile, the laughter in Kyle’s face as he watches Ben.

“Steak!!” Kyle howls with eagerness.

“I’ll help,” Darrek says, going with Gabriel to the grill and gathering plates and utensils.

“So?” Gabriel asks Darrek subtly, nodding back at Kyle, who is now walking over to Ben to help him get away from Sierra.

“We’re cool. I’m... relieved,” Darrek tells him.

“I’m glad to hear it,” Gabriel grins, kissing him once.

“Thanks for doing this. I guess you know me pretty well. It was a great idea.”

“You’re welcome,” he nods.

Snaking an arm around Gabriel’s waist, kissing his cheek, Darrek tells him, “And thanks for being civil with Kyle. I can tell that Ben isn’t too thrilled with me right now, and I’m not exactly sure why, but I think Kyle’s hard enough on himself for all of us. Right now, I’m just glad we can all be in the same place without throwing real punches. I just wanna eat some of this steak that smells so damn good and then see our guests on their way so I can have you all to myself again.”

“Hell yes to that. Don’t worry about Ben. He gets protective of me when he has no right to. I told him what happened last night in a
very
non-specific way. Told him I trusted you enough,
loved you
enough, to be with you like that. He
is
my best friend and it meant a lot to me to be able to tell him that, and kind of show him how much I trust you. But, I also want him to see, somehow,
why
I love you so much. Plus, the fact that my best friend is in a relationship with your best friend... it means we
have to
all get along somehow.”

“Well, progress has been made. I can see why Ben hates me if you told him that, though. I think I’d hate me too.”

“He doesn’t hate you,” Gabriel assures him, secretly amazed that he manages to sound so convinced of the fact when he says the words aloud, handing over a plate full of potatoes and another loaded with ears of roasted corn. “He just needs to get to know you. Come on. Let’s eat.”

They set the food out and the four of them sit down at the picnic table on the back patio, in the shade. The conversation is stilted at first, but once Darrek begins to tell embarrassing stories about his and Kyle’s adolescence, with Kyle jumping in to supply further gory details and cringe-inducing anecdotes, the ice begins to break and they all dissolve into laughter as they enjoy the barbequed feast.

A few hours later, Gabriel and Darrek are watching Ben and Kyle drive off, and waving goodbye to them from the yard before heading inside to escape the gathering mosquitoes. They content themselves with the knowledge that even if Gabriel and Kyle, and Darrek and Ben cannot yet be called the best of friends, they at least know that they all have enough in common, and enough motivation, to put forth the effort to try to get along.

“You’re not really going to quit, are you?”

“Well, I was thinking about it. I’d almost completely decided to do it, and just go independent. I mean, it’s not like we need the money, but....”

“But what?” Kyle prods.

Darrek sighs, the phone pressed against his ear, sitting back in the lawn chair and watching Sierra chew frantically on a steak bone. It was one of the remnants of dinner, which he had made for two, in the hopes that Gabriel would be home in time to eat. He wasn’t, and had called to say he would be home late. Again. So, Darrek had eaten alone for the fourth time that week.

“I’m waiting....”

“I know. Okay, well, Gabriel’s been working really hard this week, training the new Dom, and he says he’s backlogged with video work too, and he’s still hoping to have time to start a video production business once the training settles down, so....”

“Dude. Finish a sentence.”

“I’m sorry,” Darrek sighs, “I just....”

I’m lonely
, he thinks, but doesn’t say.

“So you’re bored?”

“Yeah. I’m bored. It’s not fun to sit around at home alone all day. Even when I have projects going, I need something to break the monotony. I want to see other people.”

Kyle laughs, saying with a sarcastic, scandalized tone, “Does Gabriel know?!”

“Oh, you know what I mean. So, I’m not quitting. I need to have something to do.”

“Build a dungeon.”

“That’d be a little... self-serving, wouldn’t it?”

“So?”

“Haven’t
you
been bored?”

“Not really. Ben keeps me occupied, and I’ve been doing some video shoots here and there at Diadem, doing some repairs around Ben’s place, too. He’s not really motivated to do carpentry projects himself. Says he’d rather watch me do it.”

“You’re still doing those submissive videos?” Darrek asks, trying to make the question sound as easy as his others, and not entirely succeeding.

“Of course. They pay well, and they don’t exactly feel like work. I’d rather do that than be sweaty and sore on a job site. Still sweaty and sore, but...you know...in a
good
way.”

“Should we be...should we be talking about this stuff? Is it weird?”

“Not weird for me.”

Darrek rolls his eyes.

“That’s because you over-share. On all fronts.”

Kyle asks, “Hey, did you ever... um... look at the site? At the videos?”

Darrek hears the change in Kyle’s tone, the sudden meekness in it. At the same time that it makes Darrek uncomfortable to catch a glimpse of his friend’s submissive side, it excites him as well, so, therefore, he feels guilty about it.

“Honestly? Almost. But I stopped myself, because it felt like if I did look at it, I wouldn’t be able to un-see it, if you know what I mean. Plus, I need to....”

He pauses, unsure whether to continue speaking. But then he does, because it’s
Kyle
, and he’s always been able to tell Kyle everything.

“...I need to obey Gabriel. I belong to him now, so it would be a... a break of trust to look without his permission.”

“Don’t worry, Dare. I get it. I don’t know if Ben would be thrilled about me looking at videos of you and Gabriel. He has let me watch videos of other people, but he wouldn’t like it if it was you.”

“Just me?”

“Yeah. Just you.”

“Um, I have to ask, man. You don’t have to say anything, because I know your situation with Ben is a little more hardcore than me and Gabe, but... does Ben seriously hate me? Has he said anything to you?”

“Dare....”

“I’m sorry. Forget I asked, okay?”

“No... it’s just... look, if I tell you this, then I have to tell him that I told you.”

“I don’t want to get you in trouble. Don’t tell me then.”

“I want to. You deserve to know. Hell, I think he’d want you to know so that he doesn’t have to worry so damn much. And he wouldn’t talk about this stuff to me at first, but, thankfully, he trusts me now, so.... Okay. He thinks you forced yourself on Gabriel. He’s worried that you’re hurting him, and that Gabriel is letting you hurt him. Gabriel has stopped telling Ben anything about your relationship and it’s making Ben go bat-shit crazy. You’re not... you know... to Gabriel, are you?”

“No! We haven’t even had sex all week. Gabe gets home and he wants to just sleep ’Cause he’s so tired. It was only the one time anyway, and he wanted me to. It’s hard to explain. But I would never hurt Gabriel. I love him! I know the shit he’s been through and I would never hurt him like that or make him relive it. Ever.”

“What happened to him?”

“You don’t know?”

“Not really. Ben never told me, and....”

“I’m sorry. I can’t tell you anymore. It would be a betrayal of Gabriel.”

“I know. All I know is it’s about some guy named Harry. Was he raped? Is that why Ben acts that way? It would make sense. But it seems like this has been going on for years. Gabriel’s always been this, like,
treasure
of Ben and Trace’s. They won’t let anyone near him. Did it happen when he was a kid? Jesus, was it... it wasn’t a
family member
, was it?”

“I can’t.”

“I know. I know. I’m sorry. God. Poor Gabe. No wonder he was always so defensive and shit.”

“I’ve gotta get going, man. But I’ll call you tomorrow. And then I guess I’ll see you Monday at work.”

“Yeah. Back to the grind. Take it easy, Dare.”

“You too,” Darrek responds softly before closing the phone and tucking it away.

Gabriel shuffles through the door and drops his keys, cell phone, iPod, wallet, sunglasses, and some change on the kitchen table before somehow making his way over to Darrek on the couch and pretty much falling onto him, straddling his lap, arms limp by his side. Darrek’s big hands go to his back, feeling the heat bake off of Gabriel through his thin shirt.

“You smell like mangoes,” Darrek murmurs, sniffing at Gabriel’s hair.

Grinning, Gabriel admits, “Yeah. Took a shower at work before I left. Hot as balls in that damn place sometimes. They always have the fruitiest soap there.”

“Appropriate.”

“Hey!”

Gabriel sits back on Darrek’s thighs, squinting down his nose at him. Then he finally catches the mouth-watering scent of cooked meat, and his eyes scan the scrubbed-clean dishes drying in the rack.

“Oh fuck. You... you made dinner, didn’t you? I missed it. God, I’m
sorry
, Dare!”

“It’s okay. Saved you leftovers, but you probably ate already, right? And you look tired as hell. Let’s go up to bed,” Darrek coaxes, but doesn’t move since he’s enjoying having Gabriel sit on him way too much. His fingers curl around the sides of Gabriel’s hips over to the roundness of his behind, thumbs hooking in the waist of his jeans and brushing over the soft skin under his clothes.

“I’m such an ass,” Gabriel groans. “You made dinner, which you had to eat alone, cleaned up, and now you’re watching the game but because of me and my stupid insomnia you have to go to bed early. And we haven’t even gotten to fuck for
days
because I’ve been working so damn much!”

“Gabe...” Darrek tries to interrupt, and fails.

“No. I don’t care how tired I am. I’m making this up to you. Now. What do you want? Name it.”

“Gabriel...” Darrek sighs, frowning and turning off the television with a click of the remote.

“I’m serious.”

“I know you are. But, you’ve been working all day! It’s okay to need to rest. I don’t only love you for the sex, you know. Tell me about the new Dom. What’s his name?”

“You really want to hear about this stuff?” Gabriel asks doubtfully.

“Yeah. This is what you do. This is important to you. So, tell me.”

“Okay, well, his name is Micah. He used to be a client of Ben’s, but he expressed an interest in learning to dominate, so I’m training him. Today he was with a client and I just kind of instructed without getting involved. Gradually I’ll become less and less involved until he’s all on his own.”

“How does that make sense for him to go from being a sub to a Dom?”

“Well, it’s actually pretty handy, because he’s familiar with a lot of the techniques already, and knows how everything feels. Makes him a better Dom if he knows exactly what he’s doing to people.”

“Did you ever... um,
assist
with him, when he was a submissive? You said Ben was his Dom, but did you...?”

“Yeah. I’ve assisted a bunch of times. Just a few weeks ago I did some stuff with him — watersports, actually. Ben bound him to a table with a vibrating toy up his ass and his jeans still on. I straddled him and peed on him,” he admits.

“Damn,” Darrek murmurs, his face unreadable.

“Does it make you uncomfortable that I’ve done stuff with him? You can be honest.”

“A little. I guess I just don’t like that it seems as if everyone has had a piece of you. I want you all for myself,” Darrek confesses, brushing his fingers over Gabriel’s lower back, not meeting his eyes.

“Well, no one gets a piece of me anymore. Now I’m yours. Only yours,” Gabriel promises, grinding purposefully forwards on Darrek’s lap.

“Don’t,” Darrek gasps. “It’s hard enough with you sitting on me like this, without you doing that too....”

“Hard enough?” Gabriel smiles, teasing, grinding forward again. The pronounced bulge in his pants squeezes up against Darrek’s groin, rubbing at the sensitive, swollen flesh through their pants. “Show me. Show me how hard it is.”

“
Don’t
...” Darrek whines.

“Why not?”

“Because I’m just
barely
holding myself back from yanking these goddamned jeans off of you and fucking you right now.”

“Who said you couldn’t fuck me?” Gabriel asks softly, enticingly. Too much so.

“I did.”

“Well, I disagree,” Gabriel says simply.

“Gabriel, I can’t do that again. I refuse to be the bad guy and hurt you. I won’t do it. I can’t. Please don’t ask me to.”

“Where did this come from?” Gabriel frowns, searching Darrek’s face, his movements stilling. “I thought last time went fine. A hell of a lot better than I hoped for, honestly.”

Turning his face away, Darrek admits, “Your friends think I’m
hurting
you.”

Gabriel knows he can’t deny it, knows it’s the truth. He’s seen it in Ben and Trace’s eyes, heard it in their accusations. He can’t deny it, so instead, he becomes infuriated.