Den of Desire (12 page)

“How's the rest of the family taking it?”

Cal leaned his head back on the chair. “Does it matter?” he challenged.

“It should,” he replied.

“Not to my father. All that matters is how things look, not how they are,” he explained bitterly.

Joe cocked one eyebrow up. “Does he even know how things are?”

Cal let out a harsh laugh. “He spends his life trying not to.”

“And you spend yours making sure he's in the dark,” he prodded.

Cal reluctantly met his gaze. “Maybe,” he conceded.

“Isn't it time your brother and sister stood on their own?”

His lips formed a grim line. “If only,” he mused.

Joe released a sigh. “All I'm saying is...”

Cal held up a hand to stop him. “We all have our burdens. Sometimes, they're heavy. Other times, they're light, but they're always there.”

He got up to walk across the room and stop at the door. Joe looked over at him.

“Be careful with this. I know you feel something for this girl, but don't blow everything we've worked for,” Cal warned him.

Joe stared at the door long after Cal left. He knew Cal was right. No matter what he felt for Mara, he couldn't let it ruin what they had worked so hard to build. He would find whoever was doing this, and then he would do what he should've done a long time ago.

He would end things.

Before they got completely out of control.

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Chapter 18

“Where the hell have you been?”

Mara's eyes widened. She looked around the small courtyard of the Court of Two Sisters Restaurant to see several people glance at them. Turning back to Lexi, she glared.

“Lexi, will you keep your voice down?”

“No, I will not keep it down. You find out you're being stalked, and then you disappear for two days. I was scared to death,” she said.

Guilt speared through her as rough as any lance. “I'm sorry, Lex. You're right. I should have let you know what was going on,” she conceded.

Lexi shot her a look that would have made a lesser person wince. “After everything we've been through together, we owe it to each other to be there when things happen.”

She looked away from the pain she saw in Lexi's eyes. Her friend was right. They had been through too much to be careless with each other's feelings. She'd known Lexi since college. Being a small-town girl from Indiana, New Orleans had seemed like a playground. A dangerous playground. Lexi had been kind enough to take her under her wing. She had also helped her through one of the worst times of her life.

After graduation, when she'd moved back to Indiana to be with Dan only to find him cheating on her, Lexi had insisted that she move back to New Orleans. She had even let Mara stay at her apartment for a while. Despite her best efforts to become a hermit for the rest of her life, Lexi had made Mara break out of her shell. She was the best friend Mara had ever had.

“I'm sorry, Lexi. I should've called to let you know. Things ... things happened pretty fast.”

Lexi took a sip of wine. “So, where were you?”

Mara licked her lips before answering. “I was with Joe,” she replied.

Lexi leaned in, her gaze intent. “What exactly do you mean when you say ‘with Joe?'” she challenged.

She couldn't help but smile at her friend's obvious interest. “After seeing the photos, Joe thought I should stay with him for a few days,” she explained.

Lexi's eyebrows arched high. “Oh, he did, did he?” she quipped.

She pursed her lips. “Lexi, it was purely for safety reasons,” she admonished.

Lexi rolled her eyes. “I guess that's why you look like a woman who has thoroughly enjoyed her hideout?”

She grinned ruefully. “Okay, so maybe hiding out wasn't the worst time I've had in the past few years. Besides, it gave me a lot of time to write,” she reasoned.

“I'll just bet it did.” Lexi lifted her glass in mock tribute. “Then, to you. God knows after all that you went through with that jerk Dan, you certainly deserve some happiness,” she toasted.

Mara lifted her glass, her lips curving as the glasses made a clinking sound. “You're right. I do deserve it,” she agreed.

Lexi took a sip before lowering it to the table. Her head bobbed in agreement at Mara's reply. “Damn right, girl. After being cooped up in that apartment, it was high time that you started living life again.”

She stared into her wineglass, cradling the stem gently. After everything that happened with Dan, she did deserve it. But it was more than that. Joe was giving her something back that had been taken from her. He was giving her back her sexuality. When things ended with Dan, she'd wondered if she would ever be able to feel sexy again. For a while, she'd thought she never would. Now, with Joe's help, she did.

Still, as thankful as she was, she couldn't stop the feeling that their time together came with an expiration date. As much as she tried to ignore the feeling, she also had the terrible suspicion that that date was getting closer by the minute.

Every moment that she spent with him, she lost another piece of her heart. If she didn't do something soon, she would be devastated when he decided to end their little arrangement. And he would. She was sure of that. No, it was better to do what she knew she had to now, before things got even more complicated.

Still, that wasn't the real reason she was leaving. After thinking about it all day, there was only one solution. She refused to live in fear. Dan had stolen her confidence, but she would not allow some unknown person to steal her sense of security too. No, she was done with it. It was time for her life to belong to her. She wasn't going to wait for some guy to make the decisions for her, and she sure as hell wasn't going to hole up in her house because some pervert was getting a cheap thrill.

Not anymore.

Not ever again.

She put her glass down and looked at Lexi. “Lexi, what do you have planned tonight?” she asked.

“Oh, I don't know. Why?” she inquired.

“Would you help me get my things from Joe's?”

Her eyes narrowed. “But I thought you said things were good between you two,” she reminded.

“They are, but it's time for me to stand on my own,” she stated firmly.

Lexi leaned in. “Mara, are you sure that's a good idea? I mean, if someone really is following you...”

Mara cut her off. “Lexi, I refuse to live in fear over this.”

Lexi pursed her lips. “Just don't sacrifice your safety so that you can protect your heart.”

When Mara didn't reply, she continued. “Look, Mara, I'm your friend. I know how you feel about Joe even if you're not ready to admit it to yourself. I just want you to be smart about this,” she warned.

Her lips formed a thin line. “I am, Lexi. This is just something I have to do,” she explained solemnly.

Lexi sat back in her chair for a minute before replying. “Okay,” she said with a nod. “Then let's go.”

* * * *

Joe stared at the clock on the wall. The bold black numbers told him that it was almost time to close. Some clubs were open till sunrise, but unlike their owners, he liked to sleep. Besides that, the patrons of his club were dedicated. They would come if he was only open for a few hours in the afternoon. Still, the closer he came to closing time, the closer he got to a conversation that he wasn't ready to have.

As much as he didn't want to admit it, Cal was right. No matter what he did or did not feel about Mara, he couldn't risk everything for her. There was too much at stake. Still, the thought of her leaving made him want to hit something. When he suggested that she stay with him, he had no idea how much he would want her there or how it would feel to have to tell her to leave.

Twenty-three minutes from now, the club would close, and he would have to tell her that things had to cool down between them. It wasn't like he was turning her out on the streets. He wasn't that much of an ass. No, he planned to do the right thing. He would put her up in a hotel room across town where no one, especially whoever was following them, would find her. It was the right thing to do. Plus, he would have the peace of mind of knowing that she was safe.

A knock at the door startled him. He shook his head, walking across the room to answer it.

“Hi,” she said, her voice drifting over him softly.

He backed up to allow her entrance before closing the door behind her. “What are you doing here? I thought we agreed that you would stay away from the club for a while,” he reminded.

“I needed to talk to you,” she said.

This was it.

This was the moment he had been dreading all day. As he looked at her, he knew that it wouldn't be easy. But he had to do it. There was no other choice. He took his time walking back to his desk before turning to face her.

“What is it? Did something happen?” he asked, his nerves on high alert.

She shook her head. “No, nothing happened. It's just time for me to get back to my life,” she explained.

His eyebrows bunched together as an uncomfortable feeling swept through his chest. “I don't understand. What are you talking about?”

She smiled hesitantly. “Joe, you've been great, but I can't stay with you forever.”

The response was so immediate he had no time to stop it. “Mara, let's think about this. Go home, and when I get done here, we can talk about it,” he reasoned.

What the hell was wrong with him?

Wasn't this what he wanted?

Wasn't she giving him the easy out that he had prayed for?

So why the hell was he screwing it up?

In truth, he wasn't really sure. He had been planning to give her the same speech she was giving him all day, but somehow hearing the words leave her mouth hit him like a sucker punch.

He wasn't ready for it.

And it hurt.

“It's already done. I got my stuff before I came here.”

When he stared at her dumbfounded, she continued. “I can't thank you enough for letting me stay with you, but I can't hide forever. I won't.”

It hit him like a ton of bricks.

Hard as nails and completely unsuspected.

He didn't want her to go. Somewhere in the middle of everything that had happened between them, he had developed feelings for her. Feelings that were strong. Feelings that he wasn't ready for.

“And what if the person who took the pictures is still following you? What then?” he prodded.

She looked away, a single chink in the armor she wore tonight. “Then I'll deal with it,” she replied, sounding more sure than she looked.

“How?” he asked.

She rolled her eyes. “Joe, I'm not exactly a damsel in distress,” she chided.

“No,” he said. “A damsel in distress is smart enough to know she needs help.”

Her lips formed a thin line. “It's not your job to protect me.”

He shook his head.

She was right.

He didn't want to admit it, but she was.

“Mara, you weren't the only one in those photos,” he reminded.

She closed her eyes for a minute before focusing her gaze on him again. “I know. But I'm not going to change my whole life because someone pulled out their camera.”

He tilted his head to the side. “Someone who knows where you live, who delivered the photo to you personally,” he stated.

“I know,” she said, shaking her head. She took a deep breath before sliding his spare key across the desk. “Joe, I've made my decision. Whatever happens, I'll be okay.”

He stared at her, knowing that he couldn't change her mind, knowing that he shouldn't. Still, when he watched her walk out of the club that night, he had to stop himself from following her.

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Chapter 19

This was ridiculous.

He stared up at the dimly lit window, calling himself all kinds of a fool. For over a week, he'd been coming here, watching, waiting. He tried to convince himself that he was doing it for her own good, that he was doing it to protect her, but deep down, he knew the truth. As much as he hated to admit it, he couldn't stop thinking about her. Every night he sat in his office watching the monitors, searching for her. But true to her word, she had kept her distance, and that burned. He couldn't help but admire her courage, even as he cursed her stubborn bravado.

It was the worst kind of irony.

He should be happy. Things had played out exactly as they were supposed to—even Cal had breathed a sigh of relief. So why did he feel so empty?

He hadn't felt this empty since...

No, he didn't want to think about her or the cruel lesson she'd taught him years ago.

Every time a woman got too close, he thought of Annette Peters. She had been the most popular girl in college. Everyone wanted to be a part of her world. And he was no different. Except that he wanted to be her world. Annette was an excellent student, head cheerleader, and she came from one of the richest families in town.

So, it was no wonder that a no-account like him was stunned when she set her sights on him. He was a goner from the first look. Like everyone else in town, he was instantly besotted. He had fallen in love the minute he saw her, even going so far as to buy an engagement ring. But when he went to propose, he found her in bed with his roommate.

That was when he learned the truth.

Love was a deluded emotion. He couldn't trust it. And just when he thought he was in deep, that was the moment when he was played for the biggest fool. He made a promise to himself that night that he would never again be that vulnerable. And now here he was, sitting outside her apartment like an idiot. After that day, he had never been the same. Even Annette's tearful pleas couldn't change things. Something inside of him shut down. And up until now, that was the way he liked it.

Until Mara.

There was something about her that made him want more.

And that was dangerous. Because opening up to Mara meant taking the biggest risk of all.

He saw the silhouette of her body standing before the window. The blinds rose, and he saw her face. God, she was beautiful. He felt his cock press painfully against the barrier of his pants. Her head turned, and she spotted his car. For a moment, he stopped breathing as he waited for her reaction. Then she lowered the blinds.