Desert World Rebirth (6 page)

“That’s normal. The system is trying to connect with a subspace broadcast. Fair warning, it could be that no one is sending updates our direction anymore. This system has been off-line for years.”

Temar ran his fingers across the little indicator lights. All this might be for nothing—it could be that no one out there cared enough to even watch one little colony on the edge of the universe, but still, Shan had spent all of twilight and a good deal of the night battling the equipment. That meant more than his awkward, aborted attempt to suggest that they get married. Married. That was such an odd thought, Temar had never entertained it. He had always been the shy one who never fit in, so he’d resigned himself to being the same as an adult.

“Thank you for trying, either way,” Temar said into the microphone.

“You’re welcome. I’m coming back down. Can you turn on external lights?”

“Got it.” Temar hit the switch for the outside lights. The speaker made a strange sort of clicking sound and then the light above it faded from green to black as the system powered down. Temar wondered if they were draining the solar systems, running this many machines. If so, he would have to make it up to Shan. He could definitely make it up. Coming over, Temar had been nervous about sex, but now that he’d felt Shan shudder and come under his hands, he was eager to try again. Leaving the control board and the confusing manual, he headed through the living space into Shan’s sleeping area.

One side was taken up by a table covered with a thousand small parts that Temar didn’t recognize, and the bed dominated the other side, the blanket on the floor at the foot of it and the sheets rumpled. Temar could see the sun-shaped wrinkles where Shan had fisted the fabric. Stepping forward, he let his fingers glide over the sheets as his body remembered the way it had felt to reach out for someone, to feel warm skin under his hand, and to feel safe in a bed. He could definitely repay Shan for his time and effort.

It took several minutes before he heard Shan call out, “Temar?”

“In here,” Temar answered.

In a second, Shan appeared in the doorway, a long streak of dirt or oil down one cheek and his hair sticking up at odd angles. Temar smiled.

“Are you laughing at me?” Shan asked with a sort of mock indignation.

“Yes,” Temar agreed, his smile growing even wider.

Shan reached up and ran his fingers through his hair, which only made the direction of the clumps change without fixing anything. “I had to hang over the edge of the platform to reach the burnt circuits.”

“That explains the hair,” Temar said, a laugh in his voice as he stepped closer. Shan immediately stilled, his eyes darkening. Despite the clear interest, he slowly lowered his arm and waited for Temar. Taking one more step, Temar stopped right in front of Shan and reached up to smooth down his hair. Shan reached up and ran his thumb along Temar’s jaw, his expression turning soft.

Temar caught his hand. “This time, I want to explore,” he said. He brought Shan’s hand up to his lips and kissed the knuckles. Shan yielded as Temar took a step backward and pulled Shan toward the bed.

“Making up for time we lost because I was acting like an idiot?” Shan asked.

“Yep.”

Shan laughed. “That’s fair. I should warn you that I can be an idiot on a fairly regular basis. I mean, I liked you from the time you started coming to church, and I wasted all that time.”

“You did?” Temar was surprised. Back then, his father’s drinking had been spiraling out of control, and he’d been showing signs of liver failure, and Cyla had been angry all the time. The church had been a refuge, and Shan had been just a priest. Temar hadn’t really thought of him as a man having hopes and lusts of his own.

“I was careful to not spend too much time around you, because you did tempt me,” Shan admitted. “And every time someone else tried to catch your eye, I could feel a very unpriestly sort of jealousy.”

Temar sat on the edge of the bed and pulled Shan down next to him. “Very few people ever tried to catch my eye.”

“Oh, quite a few did. More than you noticed, clearly,” Shan disagreed.

This wasn’t the conversation Temar wanted to have. Actually, he didn’t want to talk at all. He leaned closer and caught Shan by the back of his neck, pulling him close enough to kiss. He liked kissing Shan. Shan’s lips parted, and Temar quested deeper with his tongue. Shan’s hand came to rest against Temar’s hip, his fingers pressing without bruising and his breathing growing more labored. Temar pulled back, and Shan looked utterly adorable with his eyes half closed and his mouth still slightly open. Temar had been so afraid that touching another would bring back the ghosts of Ben, yet those very fears and ghosts scattered every time he looked at Shan.

“Bed?” Temar suggested, scooting farther up the mattress.

“That works,” Shan agreed. He got up and moved to the side of the bed, where he kicked off his shoes before getting in. He reached out for Temar, but Temar intercepted his hand.

“You distracted me too much last time. This time I want to explore,” he said.

Shan swallowed so that his Adam’s apple bobbed as he settled his weight down onto his side. “Explore away.” His voice was low and rough, and Temar realized he’d done that. He’d reduced Shan to this hard need that left his voice gravelly and his cock pressing up against his pants. Reaching down, Temar ran a finger over Shan’s trapped cock, and Shan sucked in a fast breath, but he didn’t protest. Temar shifted closer, pressing on Shan’s shoulder to urge him to lie on his back. Once Shan had settled, Temar moved to straddle him. He looked down into warm, brown eyes that looked up at him with trust.

“I like making up for lost time,” Shan said. He rested his hands against Temar’s legs, sliding them up and down as he waited. Before, Temar had been driven to finish, to prove something, and to ease the growing lust that drove him out to the relay station. Funny how his anger with Dee’eta—with the world and even Shan—had turned into a lust that motivated him to confront Shan. But now that the anger had faded, he wanted something slower. He wanted to feel every second of this.

Temar rested his palms against Shan’s waist, slipping his fingers up under his shirt and then sliding up to feel the warm skin. Shan’s muscles tensed, his stomach growing firm as Temar stroked up the skin, feeling the texture of the chest hair under his fingers. Sliding up farther, the hem of Shan’s shirt grew taut just as Temar’s questing fingers found the nipples. He ran fingernails lightly over the pebbled skin. Shan arched his back and thrust up so hard that he pushed Temar a few inches into the air, but Temar rode it out, playing with the nipples and watching as Shan gasped for breath. He gave one a slightly harder pull, and Shan hissed loudly. When Temar finally stopped, Shan collapsed back onto the bed, his chest rising and falling with each loud gasp of air. Temar had done that to him.

“Good?” Temar asked.

Shan’s eyes came open. “Very,” he agreed. “I could show you.”

“Another time,” Temar said as he pulled on the bottom of Shan’s shirt. Shan lifted himself to allow Temar to pull the shirt off, and then Temar could see the strong body under him. Shan’s right forearm had a streak of blood, and Temar traced it back to a cut just inside his elbow. He let his finger gently trace the new scab.

“I cut it on the access panel side,” Shan explained before Temar could ask the question.

“I’ll have to make that up to you.”

Temar pulled his own shirt off, tossing it to the side before he started to lean in closer, but Shan’s hand caught him on the shoulder, holding him off. “You don’t have anything to make up to me,” Shan said, his seriousness annoying Temar. He wanted this to be about hot lust and need, not about words. He’d never been good with words. Numbers he understood, glass he understood. He’d sat in his room doing equations to calculate water use for the whole valley, but it had been Cyla who tried to explain what he’d found, because he never had been comfortable with words. He truly wasn’t comfortable with his lover’s guilt looking him in the eye.

“I don’t have to do anything,” Temar agreed. “But I want to, and I really don’t want to stop for conversation,” he pointed out.

Shan’s smile was slow, but genuine. “I’m being an ass again, aren’t I?” he asked, lowering his hand back to the bed.

“Yes,” Temar answered, and then he leaned in and nipped at Shan’s earlobe before moving down to kiss his neck. Shan shifted under him, making small, hungry noises. Temar shifted down and tasted the skin at Shan’s collarbone, tasting salt and musk. Pushing himself up, he blew across the damp skin, and Shan shivered, the hairs on his arms standing up.

“Oh God.” Shan pressed his head back into the pillow. Temar ran his hands over Shan’s shoulders, feeling the muscles strain as Shan pressed himself into the bed. Sliding down, Temar caught Shan’s nipple in his mouth, sucking at him. Shan cried out and bucked up into the air. Temar had to hold on to Shan’s arms to keep from getting pushed to the side.

When Shan collapsed back onto the bed, Temar looked at him. “Problem?” he teased.

Shan gave a breathy laugh. “A little,” he agreed.

Temar was tempted to make a “little” joke, but his mind skittered back to one that Ben had used against him once, and he shied away from the memory. Instead, he moved to the other nipple and sucked at it before giving it a gentle nip. Shan’s body squirmed, but he didn’t rise and buck this time. Temar was a little disappointed. However, he did have a good idea of what would drive Shan past control. Sitting up, Temar scooted back until he could reach Shan’s pants.

Unzipping and unbuttoning them, Temar took some time to trace the shape of Shan’s cock through his underwear. Shan gasped for air, each breath coming with a half grunt that cut off in the middle. Temar could almost taste Shan’s need to flip him over and rub their bodies together until he came. However, Shan lay under him, and that was about the sexiest thing Temar had ever seen. Stepping off the bed, he pulled Shan’s pants off and dropped them on the ground. While he got his own pants off, Shan pushed his underwear off, dropping it beside the bed before lying back down.

Shan opened his mouth to say something, but Temar climbed on him, both their cocks now trapped between their bodies. Temar thrust down slowly, and watched as Shan’s pupils widened. Once he was sure that Shan was too worked up to try and start a conversation, Temar slid back, kissing the line of Shan’s chest down over his stomach to his belly button.

When he sucked the skin just below Shan’s belly button, Shan stopped breathing altogether, and his hands flew into the air, twitching for a second before he went back to clutching the sheets. Temar, when faced with Shan’s cock, suddenly froze. He could feel his own heartbeat speed up and his mouth go dry. Shan’s fingers stroked over his shoulder, a ghost touch that scattered demons, and Temar wanted this. He wanted to know what Shan tasted like.

He reached out, gathering one drop of pre-cum on his finger. He slowly lifted the finger to his mouth and sucked it. From the way Shan sucked in a breath, Temar had surprised him.

Temar lowered his head and slipped his tongue along the slit. Taking a deep breath, he slipped his mouth over the head and twirled his tongue around the end as he began sucking.

“Oh, God,” Shan gasped, and his whole body writhed. Temar had to settle his weight onto Shan’s legs and hold his hips to keep Shan from throwing him to the side. This was fun. Temar went back to work. He slid his mouth up and down the shaft, letting his tongue play with the vein that ran down the underside of Shan’s cock and to his balls. He pulled back his head and worked his tongue against the slit. He slid down again until the head of Shan’s cock brushed the back of his throat, and then he swallowed. Shan was crying out now, his words lost in the animalistic noises he was making. He’d pulled the sheets free of the bed, and one hand was tangled in them.

Letting go of Shan’s hips, Temar closed his fist around the base of Shan’s cock, holding it firmly as Shan thrust up into his mouth. Temar let Shan thrust while he worked his tongue around the cock in his mouth. With one final thrust, Shan came, and Temar felt his mouth fill with the strong, familiar taste of semen.

“Oh, God,” Shan said for about the ninth time. Temar had done that—he’d reduced Shan to exactly two words. For a time, Shan could only lie there, his mouth gaping open as he occasionally repeated those two words. After a few minutes, he seemed to pull himself back together, though. “Would you like a hand there?” Shan asked.

“Do you have one?” Temar asked playfully as he crawled up Shan’s body to lie next to him. Shan’s fingers wrapped gently around his cock and started sliding up and down, the foreskin moving to reveal the head of the cock and the slit, pre-cum slicking the skin. Arching his back, Temar caught Shan’s arm, holding on as Shan slowly stroked him until Temar could feel his body grow tight. He dug his fingers into Shan’s arm, his breath coming in hungry gasps as his whole body almost ached with a need to come.

The need built until Temar couldn’t control his body and he thrust against Shan’s fist. Shan stilled and Temar thrust harder, his body finding the pattern that made his orgasm inch closer, but as much as the lust increased, the ache increased, making his balls feel heavy and pushing him away from that edge where he could let go. The distant pain was like the rising sun that began to fill the horizon with light, and Temar cried out, desperate to finish before he could have this moment stolen. He needed this.

Shan’s other hand came up to brush across his shoulder, and Temar lashed out, pushing Shan away and rolling to his other side so he could grab his own cock. This was comfortable. He stroked himself, his body thrusting into his own fist until he came with a shout.

He finished, but the shivers of pleasure from coming transformed into a trembling that Temar couldn’t control. He didn’t want to face Shan. God, how pathetic was he that he would turn his back on a willing lover?

“Temar?” Shan asked, his voice soft. “Can I touch you?”

Temar felt his breath come in little hiccups, and he nodded without actually answering. Shan’s arms wrapped around him, one sliding in under his body. And then Shan was pulling him close so that he lay against Shan’s chest, sharing Shan’s warmth. “Shhh,” Shan murmured, and that comforting was all it took to push Temar into the grief that had been stalking him so long. He cried, and Shan hugged him tighter. “It’s okay,” Shan whispered over and over. “You’re safe.”