Deserted (17 page)

           
I was on
Ponika’s
back in an instant and my horse
wasted no time in fleeing. The man’s voice echoed on the wind, however, and I
looked back foolishly as he appeared in the streets. “You and your hellish
horse can
rot
!” He cackled and with a quick movement of his arm, the banshees
around us swooped in.

           
They were everywhere; I couldn’t count how many had emerged from the houses,
flying fast and wailing loudly. They followed after us as we rushed to escape,
going right through
Ponika’s
hind quarters as he
nipped at the spirits on our sides. They couldn’t touch us or us them, but
their wails were enough to drive someone to insanity. I did my best to cover my
ears as I trusted
Ponika
to guide us to safety.

           
I don’t even know where I am at the moment. The wind is blowing strong and with
it comes a very strange smell; one that reminds me of the northern trail back
in Salvation. I am currently gathering my energy next to a large boulder; there
are quite a few strewn about around here that are shielding me from the blowing
sand.
Ponika
is standing close by, seeming to guard
me still. Did he drop me off in the safest spot he could find? However I got
here, I know it was with
Ponika’s
trust and guidance.
I must have blacked out from the throbbing pain in my skull as I don’t remember
how I got here; I merely awoke here with
Ponika’s
worried snout sniffing frantically at my face. I still feel exhausted and
there’s a slight pulsing still left in my head. My skin feels clammy to the
touch; I may have stopped sweating but it has definitely done its damage
already. I had instinctively reached for my canister and was momentarily
confused when I couldn’t find it. My backpack…my canister was sitting in the
side pocket when I tossed it. My stomach dropped at the thought; now is not the
time to be dehydrated.

I will
have to start moving again soon; all our supplies are gone and I won’t last
long without water. I have to start from scratch now but with only a fraction
of the strength…I can only hope to be able to write again soon.

           
Ponika
and I had trotted along the makeshift path of
boulders as I struggled to regain my composure. My stomach had tossed with each
step
Ponika
took; it rumbled and heaved relentlessly
until I forced myself from my horse’s back. I stumbled as I fell off of him and
it took me a while to drag myself to my feet.
Ponika
still stood firmly beside me, allowing me to use him as an anchor to balance
myself. I leaned against him and barely drudged myself forward; I think
Ponika
moved me more than my own two feet. The nausea
wouldn’t go away and I constantly felt as though I had a lump in my throat; I
was sure that I was about to lose my lunch at any moment. As we slowly trekked
along a sudden glow appeared in the distance; an aura of a bright green
substance, similar to what emanated from
Krastanov’s
lab.
Ponika
had come to a slow stop and I stared
ahead with halted breath. My vision was becoming more blurry the more I looked
at the strange hue and I rubbed my eyes fiercely. As I wobbled on my feet I
noticed a few figures on the horizon; there appeared to be someone – or
something
– wandering around in the light ahead of us.

           
 “Stay here.” I squeaked the words out between gasps of shallow breath as
I hobbled my way towards the hue. “Hello?” I called out and I saw figures
skitter in the distance.

I tried
to inch forward but I found my eyes had become even worse; I could no longer
focus on anything around me and I had found it difficult to tell if I was
hallucinating or not. I collapsed to my knees as my head started to pound and
an acrid stench filled my nostrils; they had only gotten worse as the seconds
ticked by. My vision blurred as I grasped the air around me, trying desperately
to find another boulder to lean against. And yet, even
through
my deteriorated vision, I tried to focus on the glow in the distance. Surely it
was only more of those deranged ones nearby; what else could live so close to
what I could only assume was radioactivity? But…how could I really search for
my boys if I refused to look? What if…what if my father had become one? My mind
was made up – I
had
to know.

I
dragged myself across the sand towards the nearest fuzzy obstacle. I draped my
fingers over its cool stone and sighed in relief as I leaned against it. The
shade, I hoped, would help alleviate my pain. I leaned my head against the
stone behind me and closed my eyes as
Ponika
wandered
towards me, enveloping me with his own wide shadow. As I tried to regain my
strength a surge of sharp pain seared through my shoulder and I grabbed at my
wound involuntarily, clutching it tightly in my other hand. The first of many
mistakes: I only made matters worse as my shoulder throbbed even harder at my
touch. It shook uncontrollably under my hand, its spasms worsening by the
second. And yet I didn’t want to let go, afraid that the air and sun would
somehow make it worse. I soon had no choice.

The
feeling in my stomach had finally migrated and I knew I had only seconds before
I vomited all over myself. Lurching to my feet I stumbled towards the boulder’s
backside and heaved heavily, barely missing my feet in the process. But now I
no longer cared; I just wanted to sleep.

I
dragged myself across the boulder and back to my sitting position, groaning and
swallowing hard in the process. I leaned against the cool stone and prepared to
rest when I realized I no longer felt pain. I could barely see my arm but its
outline still twitched emphatically, dancing around in the sand beside me. I
was drenched in sweat; beads trickled down my limb, making my now miscoloured
skin appear almost reflective when the sun touched it. That couldn’t be right,
though…if I was sweating, then why did I feel so cold? I casually wiped the
hair from my eyes, realizing for the first time that it clung to me in a sticky
heap. My skin felt frigid and clammy under my fingers and my clothes suddenly
felt so constricting, clinging to me uncomfortably, yet I felt too cold to
remove them. I sat there, tired and confused, trying to focus on anything but
the knot of fear that was welling up in my stomach.

“I
just…need a minute,
Ponika
. I’ll go look in a minute
bud, then we can continue on.” I patted him gently with my left hand, surprised
by how drained such a small action made me feel.

I closed
my eyes and must have fallen asleep, though it couldn’t have been for long. The
anxiety I felt earlier had passed, at least, but I no longer cared. I was
exhausted and just wanted it all to end…regardless of just what exactly that
meant for me.

“
Ponika
…” I whispered. “You need to go, buddy.” I attempted
the best hug I could with him,
then
drew away. I felt
oddly peaceful now; the future didn’t seem quite so scary anymore. “I…I don’t
think I’m going to make it.” Finally putting words to it didn’t bother me as
much as the thought had earlier. “You need to go – find a way home,
Ponika
…or the Utopia I failed to get to. Just…something,
anything! But you can’t stay here.”

I closed
my eyes, ready to accept what I had gotten myself into when the shuffling of
Ponika’s
hooves caused me to look back up and see that he
had merely moved closer to me. He stared at me intently. “Go!” I tried to yell
out but my voice faltered and cracked. I didn’t bother repeating myself; my
body cried for rest.

And then
my horse was there, sitting in the shadows next to me. I sighed quietly. If he
wanted to stay until the end, then so be it. I closed my eyes for the last
time, focusing on my breathing and the comfort of
Ponika
.
I could still hear my arm convulsing on the hard sand but I knew it had slowed
in its thrashing. I fell deeper into the heavy embrace of darkness until my
thrashing finally ceased, allowing me to succumb, at last, to my weariness.

           
I failed. Dad…Kay…wherever you are, please forgive me.

                                                                       
*

           
I thought I heard words in the darkness. Voices, somewhat familiar, yet cloudy;
like I was swimming in an endless ocean, swept up by the torrential current.
The voices felt far away, if they were there at all. And then I felt something
touch me. Wait – or did I? I felt paralyzed, my mind muddy. But I think I heard
a conversation around me.

           
“We’re not supposed to do this.” It sounded somewhat feminine, but garbled.

           
“I can’t just leave her here!” A gruffer voice; one I know I’ve heard before.

           
“Why? We’re not supposed to interfere, you know that. You can’t help her just
because of who she is.” Another male voice, but one I could not place. It was
slightly more lucid than the woman’s.

           
“It’s not about that. She’ll die if we leave her here. Whether I know her or
not, we can’t just pass her by.” That familiar voice…and then I felt fingers
touching me, sending pins and needles racing up my arm. I supposed my body was
numb, but how was I to know? I could feel – and see – nothing. Was I truly even
alive?

           
“If we do this, we need to be quick about it. Do you think you can pull it off
without the others noticing?” The woman’s voice, sounding soft and gentle under
the ripping waves.

           
“I don’t even care if we can’t. I won’t let her die.”

           
The other man sighed. “Well, it wouldn’t be the first time we broke the rules.”
I think I heard laughter in his voice.

           
“If anything happens, I’ll take the blame. What’s one more demotion, huh?” The
familiar voice was right next to me now. I don’t know who it belonged to, but
its presence comforted me.

           
Was that even the right conversation? Was I hallucinating? Were those voices
even voices at all? I felt as though I was drugged, unable to move and unable
to understand my whirling mind. All I
did
know, however, was that I
didn’t care.
Come
what may.

                                                                       
*

My eyes
fluttered open, much to my surprise. There was green all around me, and the
faint sound of wind blowing nearby. I blinked, surprised by how good I felt.
There was no pain anymore, no encumbering weariness. I felt comfortable in the
hard bed I must have been lying in; I was no longer hot
and
cold. My
clothes were no longer constricting me. I took a deep breath, expecting to not
be able to, but I inhaled the fresh air vehemently; it was a very warm air, but
it wasn’t acrid and strong like I had expected. So I was no longer in the
wasteland, then. Just where the hell was I?

A
beautiful face suddenly appeared above me, encompassing my view; one I had missed
more than I had ever realized. A contagious smile was blazed across Kay’s face.
I could barely see the greens of the tent’s opening behind him as my eyes
adjusted to my surroundings.

“Ah,
you’re up! We were starting to worry.” He beamed that same, never-ending grin
at me; it was as if no time at all had passed.

I slowly
sat up on cot that I had been placed in. I was definitely in a medical tent of
some kind; First Aid kits were strewn about and gauze was littered upon the
stand next to me. There was another metallic bed on the other side of the room
that was piled high with circular canisters and unopened crates. My heavy eyes
rested on the sight of a full canister that dripped ever so slightly onto the
green cot which made me acutely aware of just how parched I had become. I no
longer felt queasy but my head did feel a bit muddy; I must have been heavily
sedated.

I
briefly saw Kay from the corner of my eye watching me and he turned his head to
follow my gaze. “Oh, you must be thirsty, huh? Let me get you something.” He
grabbed something from a crate nearby and rushed towards the dripping canister.

I tried
to watch his movements but my head was still heavy and slow to react. He had
appeared next to me with a glass of water before I even felt my head turn
slightly. “Kay…?” The words scratched my throat. “Kay
Thomes
?”
I tried so hard not to, but my heart raced at the sight of him.

           
He was taken aback at first. “That’s what they call me, anyway.” He chuckled.
“How did you know that?” He had set my water down upon a nightstand next to me
as he pulled up a grey folding chair to sit on.

           
I stared at him a moment in disbelief, my head bobbing as I struggled to keep
it aloft. He continued to stare at me with the same smile but unknowing eyes.
“…it’s me.” I
squinted
my eyes at him in confusion.
“Don’t you remember?” I was no longer sure if it was my sore throat or the hard
words that caused me to scratch out the sentence in a barely audible tone.