Devour (21 page)

Pastor had just turned the corner and look up startled.

“Oh. Eli, hello. And…” He looked at Enoch with a hilarious expression. “Eli?”

I giggled nervously and both Eli and Enoch chuckled.

“This is Eli’s brother, Enoch,” I told him.

“Nice to meet you, Preach,” Enoch stated and shook his hand. “I’m just visiting my little brother here from out of town.”

“I thought you were twins?”

“We are. But I was born first.”

“By 6 minutes and he never lets me forget it,” Eli offered. He extended his hand too and smiled. “Good to see you again, sir.”

“You too, son. You staying for dinner?”

“If the Mrs. will have me.”

“I’m sure she will. Enoch?”

I started to butt in and state that he was absolutely not staying but he declined.

“Nah. I’m on a strict diet, but thanks anyway.”

“Ok,” Pastor said easily but quirked a brow at him. “Do you mind if I ask where you’re from? Your accent is more pronounced than Eli’s. Where did you boys grow up?”

“Amsterdam,” Enoch answered while Eli said, “Africa.”

Eli laughed and then said, “We moved around a lot, lived all over. I guess that’s why our accents are hard to place.”

“Huh,” Pastor said. “Well, good to meet you, Enoch.”

“And you as well,” he answered slowly.

Pastor turned to look at me and cocked his head, looking thoroughly amused.

“Sunglasses at night? Do I want to ask?”

“I wouldn’t, Pastor,” I said grinning, trying to deflect. “It’s a Diva thing.”

He laughed and nodded. As soon as he went inside I turned to stare at both of them.

“Answers,” I demanded.

“All in good time, princess,” Enoch said grinning. “You need to enjoy your family dinner and I need to…trick some silly girl into feeding me. We’ll meet somewhere tonight and discuss it all.”

I groaned and turned away, disgusted. Eli grasped my fingers and I looked at the barbed string connecting us all. I turned back to the door. Although I was in awe of the whole situation, I didn’t want to think about how Enoch got his kicks.

“Get out of here,” Eli told him. I heard footsteps retreating and then Eli’s arms came around me from behind. “I’m sorry.”

There was so much in his sorry; hurt, love, trust…regret. I turned in his arms and looked at him. What was he sorry for? As if he read my mind he answered me.

“I’m sorry for dragging you in my world.”

“I’m not exactly kicking and screaming,” I said coyly.

He didn’t laugh at my joke. He lifted my hand and placed it to his cheek. He inhaled the skin at my wrist and rubbed his scruffy chin on my palm. He then kissed it and held on to me as he pulled me inside to have dinner with my family without another word.

Twelve

“
I
’m sorry you’re not feeling well. We could have done this another time, Clara,” Mrs. Ruth said in response to my ‘migraine’ excuse for wearing sunglasses at the dinner table.

“It’s ok, it’s not too bad, I just wanted to head it off, you know?” I explained and she nodded.

“So, Eli, where are you planning to go to school?” she asked him as she spoon fed one of the babies.

“I’m not sure, to be honest. I’ve thought about moving away somewhere. Like Colorado or something.”

“What’s in Colorado? A certain school you’d like to go to?”

“Well…I actually already took my core college classes, I just need to figure out my major. I’m just not sure what I want to do yet, but I‘d love to live somewhere really secluded. Maybe finish college online.”

“Ahh. Well, Clara would miss you,” she said with certainty. Eli and just looked at each other over our rice pilaf.

“Well,” Pastor replied, “I for one think it’s commendable that you’ve got a head start on college. Clara, it would seem, isn’t all that interested,” he said, stating facts.

“I’m a little confused right now…on what I want to do and what my parents wanted me to do,” I muttered. I hadn’t even realized I’d said it out loud until I felt Mrs. Ruth’s hand on mine. I glanced up to see everyone staring at me in understanding. “Sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry,” she said and patted my hand. “And don’t worry about the dishes. You guys go on and do something, I’ll get them.”

“Would it be alright if I took Clara to the park for a bit?” Eli asked cautiously.

“Sure,” Pastor said easily, “as long as you bring her home-“

“By midnight,” I answered for him and laughed as I grabbed Eli’s hand to drag him with me. “I know.”

“Have fun, kids, and be careful.”

“We will,” I called and shut the door. I didn’t bother to grab anything. “So,” I started, “we’re meeting your jerk of a brother at the park?”

“Yep.”

“Did you text him or something? How do you know that?””

“We’re family. We can call each other in our minds but I’ve been blocking them all out for years. I opened up and told him where.”

He grabbed my hand after we crossed the four lane.

“So, you see this way all the time?” I asked as I squinted at the streetlights. “It’s strange. It’s not like night vision, it’s just…bright.” I again felt a tick of nervousness as having to see this way all the time. What would things look like in the day time? What was I going to do about my green eyes, that I hadn’t even seen myself yet?

“It’s ok,” he assured me and squeezed my fingers, “it’s normal.”

“I think we are well past the realm of normal, Eli,” I muttered even as I continued to take in my surroundings. The string between us was particularly interesting. I copied his earlier movements and wrapped my fingers around it, almost expecting it to cut me with its sharp looking barbs. It floated between my fingers and my palm and it seemed to flex and move with me, like I was a part of it. Or it was a part of me. I couldn’t feel it between my fingers and it didn’t make any sense.

I pulled him to a stop.

“Please tell me what this means,” I said on a voice that left no more room for stalling. He nodded.

“I want to explain it to you before Enoch shows up anyway.”

“Ok,” I edged.

“This,” he moved his fingers along the string, “means that we’re bonded.”

“And that’s different than just being your mate?”

“Yes,” he said quietly. “When we choose a mate, that’s exactly what it is. We feel a connection with you and choose to keep you and you don’t really have much say. Yes, you feel strange around us and you feel connected but other than that, technically you could walk away and be fine if we let you. But this…this linkage is a decision, Clara.”

“A decision? What…you decided to bond yourself to me?”

“No, Clara.” He paused for an agonizing dramatic affect. “You did.”

“What?” I said in my stunned high voice. “How could I have known? I don’t even know what you’re saying.”

“I’m saying,” he said softly and pulled me to him. His hands held my waist loosely, as if he was telling me he wanted to touch me but wasn’t holding me against my will. I could leave when I wanted. “You may not have realized what it meant, but somehow, you made the decision subconsciously…that you wanted to keep me.”

Even though this was Eli, even though we knew there was more between us than some lame crush, I still flushed at his implication. I saw his smile as he gazed at me, but oddly he didn’t flinch or gasp as he registered my emotion. And his smile was genuine, not cocky, not smug. I swallowed hard and took a deep breath, my hands made their way to his upper arms.

“So you’re saying that this is my fault,” I said and motioned between us. “I don’t understand how this is different from the mating thing.”

“When we mate, like I said, it’s something that happens to us both but ultimately, it’s almost slavery. They really shouldn’t even call it a mate because it’s anything but romantic. A consort is more like it. The Devourer owns them, carts them everywhere, parades them around. The mate just stays because of the strange feelings they have for the Devourer. And most of them are shady and don’t mind the protection and lifestyle they get from us.”

“So,” I thought carefully, “that’s what I’m going to be? Just following you around everywhere like a puppy?”

“No. Of course not.”

“But before this you said I was your mate. What were you going to do with me?” I asked, not unkindly.

“I wasn’t sure. I had no plans to use you if that’s what you mean.”

“I just meant…I don’t know what I mean,” I sighed and looked at the ground between us. “I just don’t know how to take all this. You’re telling me that I chose this, wanted this. But I don’t see how that’s possible when I didn’t know it was something I
could
do.”

“It doesn’t matter.” He smiled a brilliantly bright and happy smile. “Do you have any idea what it means, that you did this. I can keep you safe now, my family has no choice but to protect you. I won’t need anything but you for the rest of my life to sustain me.”

I got his meaning and it thrilled me in an odd way.

“Is that why you aren’t freaking out and breathing funny?”

He chuckled.

“Yes.” He laughed again. “Yes, that’s why. The bond gives me everything I need. I’ll only actually feel it when you have a sudden or intense spike of emotion.” He leaned forward and kissed the corner of my mouth. I sucked in a quick breath and he laughed before he groaned slightly. “Like that.”

I allowed him to pull me up to him and kiss me. He moved with surety and conviction, like there was nothing else to do in the moment. As he held me, I felt something in my world crack. I realized that I should be completely freaking out. Completely.

This guy I’d only known for a few short weeks had somehow convinced me that I’d bound myself to him, literally, with an invisible barbed connection from my wrist to his. My life in the past few days seemed to have been flushed down the toilet in a un-ceremonial kind of way and then lifted up again by someone who could only be described as a bad guy turned good.

It wasn’t the first time I’d thought about what my parents would think of my dating him. I had so many questions that my head hurt to even begin to organize them. But in the turmoil of my internal tirade I’d come to one conclusion; somehow, this guy who seemed to know me, who cared about me, who was intensely enjoying my lips right now, had saved me.

Saved me from what, you say? I had an ok life, you say? I was spoiled and privileged and had everything most people wanted and could never have, you say?

True to all accounts except for one minor thing and in my book the most important thing. I wasn’t free.

I had been trapped; in my life, my memories, my friends, my guilt, my need to be what everyone else wanted me to. No one could save me from that life. No one but someone on the outside who saw me for who I was and not what everyone else had painted me to be.

Eli saved me from myself. I had every intention of taking advantage of it and figuring out exactly who I wanted to be from this day on.

He interrupted anything else I may have thought or said by pulling slightly away and looking down into my face.

“Wait…” He stepped back and I knew nothing good would come from that act. “Wait. No, this is wrong.”

“What?” I asked confused.

“I could no sooner ask you to do this than I could ask you ask you to run away with me.”