Diary of a Teenage Taxidermist (20 page)

But Ethan’s attention was already on the laptop, his eye widening. “This looks so professional. I was expecting something low-key and this… some of these dishes are like out of a catalog.” Ethan scrolled down with his jaw hanging low.

Robert bit his lip, his chest swelling with pride. He picked up a piece of toast and added a generous amount of cinnamon butter on top. He deserved it. “I actually earn some money on it as well.”

“I can’t believe you haven’t told me about this.” Ethan kept scrolling and checking out Rob’s old posts. “Are you gonna develop this further?” Then all of a sudden, he made a rapid turn with his body and leaned closer. “Oh, my God! Would you photograph my elk head?”

Robert grinned, munching on the toast. His hand kept roaming all over his boyfriend’s smooth back.
Boyfriend
. Even if just in his mind, it did sound nice. “Sure, I’d just have to take my lamps and arrange a bit of a studio around it.”

“There I was, thinking you were a hot football player, an ambitious student heading for pre-med, and now I find out you’re also creative and take fantastic photos?” Ethan leaned closer to kiss Rob’s lips. “Not to mention you’re hot in bed,” he whispered with a grin.

Robert’s ego was close to bursting. He nuzzled Ethan’s cheek, taking the chance to smell him again. “I have more up my sleeve,” he promised and scrolled down to the search field. He typed in the name of his most ambitious creation,
The Goddess’s Bazaar
, a feast of arabic-inspired foods displayed in the scenery of a restaurant nearby, on plates he’d purchased for the occasion and rented props.

“I really love tasting different things, and if I could pick anything to do, this would be it.” He gave Ethan a smile. Only his mother and Chris knew about this obsession of his. “Creating different flavors, reviewing restaurants, and so on.”

Ethan stared at the screen and stroked the scars on Rob’s arms. “Wow… Robert. Why don’t you then? All you told me about your plans was that you’re going to college.”

Robert blinked, and when he looked at Ethan, it seemed that his vision briefly changed to slo-mo. Was Ethan for real? Did he really think it could work out? “Because... it’s an uncertain business. I can’t predict if it works out, and if it doesn’t, I will regret it all my life.”

“Or you would always regret you never tried. Since I got that commission for the squirrels, I started thinking about it. Why wouldn’t I try and make it now? All these people who start following their passions at forty make me wonder what they could have done if they started earlier. I know it would be risky, but it’s exciting as well.” Ethan squeezed Rob’s hand, looking into his eyes. “If you make some money off it now, wouldn’t now be the time to try and develop it?”

Robert drew in a sharp breath, captured by the depth of Ethan’s single eye. He cleared his throat. “I don’t know. I don’t think I’m
that
good. Everyone can cook.”

“I can’t. And most people can definitely not cook like
that
.” Ethan pointed to the screen. “I still haven’t told my parents I’m considering at least taking a year out after high school.”

Robert sighed. “A year sounds good. You have an amazing artistic talent, you know. I’m quite jealous.” He leaned down and kissed Ethan’s arm.

Ethan smiled at him and pulled closer for another kiss, which was cut short by Ethan’s cell phone beeping. He let out a moan. “It’s my mom. She won’t give it a rest. I’m gonna have to go soon.”

Robert sighed. “Tell her you’re at my place. That you drank a bit too much and crashed with me?” He finished his smoothie and was ready to skip the salad in favor of dessert.

“You sure? No mention of hot gay sex?” Ethan snorted and started tapping a text message on his phone.

Robert chuckled and gathered some strawberry and dough on a spoon, before raising it to Ethan’s mouth. “If you must.”

“I’d rather them not know. They don’t let me date,” groaned Ethan, but he opened his mouth wide.

Robert swallowed hard, put the bowl away, and moved his hand across Ethan’s tattooed stomach. “My mom knows you’re here.”

Ethan stopped chewing and finally spoke after he swallowed. “Oh. Is she angry?” He lowered his voice.

Robert shook his head and hugged him tight, his heart speeding up to a furious tempo, as if the emotions only hit him now like a stampeding herd of antelopes. “I just came out to her downstairs. Isn’t that amazing?”

“Oh, wow! It is!” Ethan reciprocated the embrace and kissed his ear. “I’m so happy for you. Is she all right with everything?”

Robert snorted and kissed his neck. “I had to tell her because she went into my room and saw your hair. But... yeah, she’s fine with me being gay. She even wants to meet you some time, you know?”

Ethan laughed nervously. “Oh, God… But yeah, sure, I’d like to meet her. Your mom doesn’t seem as uptight as my parents.” He hugged Robert tighter.

“Yeah, she’s just... very busy.” Robert switched to the picture folder and smiled at the photo of their feet sticking out from underneath the comforter. He was so ridiculously happy.

Chapter 15

Robert smiled at the glitter he tried to clean from the sofa upholstery with a hand wrapped with tape, sticky side out. There was a lot of mess left, but he didn’t mind working one bit. The last 24 hours had been bliss. Life-changing. There was still the matter of Kelly, for whom he felt terribly sorry, but he didn’t want to approach her unprepared. Before he drove Ethan home, they managed to share a moment in the shower, and now that they had progressed to something more than blow jobs, even those felt different, somehow more... mature.

Rob laughed at himself and went on, bit after bit. He’d posted an entry with just photos and the title ‘Breakfast for two’ but hadn’t dared to read the comments yet. It fact, he hadn’t visited the site since. He was torn between being proud and feeling like a tease.

The ringtone he’d set for Ethan brought him back to reality. It was the weird instrumental music that he got his first blow job to. He loved it. Just listening to it brought back so many memories he was getting horny.

He picked the call up immediately. “Hi, have you slept?”

“No! Robert, you won’t believe what happened.” Ethan’s voice was trembling, so hard Rob could barely hear him. “They locked my workshop. I’m grounded for not coming back so long. I’m eighteen, they can’t ground me!” A deep sob stopped Ethan from talking further.

Robert froze, looked at his hand, all wrapped up in glittery tape, then a the carpet. He shouldn’t have made such an elaborate breakfast, they shouldn’t have had sex. Fuck. “I’m so sorry... are you okay?” He dropped onto the sofa.

Another sob crackled through the phone, followed by a long sniff. “No, I’m not okay! I hate them so much! They don’t understand shit. I don’t want to do things their boring way. I am so angry. I can’t do my project. I’m gonna fail the squirrel commission, and they don’t care. I miss you so much.”

Robert leaned back in the couch and looked around, over the almost pristine room. “Can I help?”

“I just… I want to tell you all this in person, and they wouldn’t let you visit, ‘cause I told them we’re dating and… I know I shouldn’t have, but I was so angry. I’m sorry, Robert.”

Robert swallowed hard, squeezing and opening the taped hand. His body was stiff, as if all his joints suddenly lacked lubrication. “It’s not your fault, baby. They have no right to do that.”

“Now other potential customers will think I’m a flake, and I can’t deliver. My reputation will be ruined. I think that’s what they want. They want me to fail. Robert, I need to see you so bad. Would you come over at night? I could let you in through the window. I just… I need a hug. I need a friend.”

Robert got up from the sofa and started pacing around, all tense. So he would be creeping into a house at night to see his lover. Things were getting serious. “Sure, of course. Just tell me if you need anything.”

“I just need you. You make me feel so safe.” There was another gut-wrenching sob and Robert wanted to be there so bad it hurt. He took a big gulp of air and walked over to the window. His car was there, ready to be driven.

“Maybe I could come over now? I just... don’t want to know you’re all alone with this.”

“I’d want that so bad, but my parents could walk in any time and they could throw you out. I don’t know what to do anymore.”

Robert pulled off the glove of tape and tossed it to the floor. He didn’t even know what to say to make Ethan feel better. He hated being powerless! It was like the moment Ethan had been taken into surgery all over again. Less horrible, but...

Ethan also kept silent for a while, just breathing hard. “Come over around eleven, okay?”

Robert nodded, squeezing the phone against his ear. “How do I get up to your room? Do I need a rope, or something?”

“I have a rope ladder, I’ll throw it down to you. You just need to park away from the house.”

“Yeah, I figured.” Robert sighed, leaning his head against the glass. “I’m so, so sorry, Ethan. You have no idea how much I want to be with you right now.”

“Just knowing you’re there is so important to me, honey. You can’t even know how much. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”

Robert slowly scooted down, gripping the windowsill hard. That declaration forced all the air out of his lungs. “That’s not true. You’re ill because of me,” he uttered, closing his eyes as a wave of guilt washed over him like a furious storm.

“I would have never found you if it wasn’t for that.” Ethan’s voice was shaky and became more quiet. “You’re worth losing an eye for.”

Rob sprang to his feet, his head flushing with intense heat. “Don’t say that. I’m gonna get you now. Will you go with me?” he whispered, already walking to the door, but he sidetracked to get the plastic bag from the bedside drawer.

“Yeah, I don’t care where we go. I just don’t want to be here. I feel so trapped.”

“I’m gonna walk up to your house. Be there in fifteen minutes, don’t worry,” whispered Rob as he rushed down the stairs. He wouldn’t let Ethan suffer on a day like this.

*

Robert was slowly creeping between the trees toward Ethan’s house. He’d left his car in a small street five minutes away and was already feeling like a bundle of nerves. What if Ethan’s parents noticed him? He was keeping to the bushes to avoid the possibility of getting spotted through the window.

He started walking around the house until he saw the windows in the attic. Ethan waved at him and seconds later, opened the window. He rolled out the ladder that went all the way down and Robert’s heart stopped when he imagined Ethan slipping and falling to his death. He looked to both sides, relieved that there were no windows on this side of the house but that didn’t make watching the climb any easier. He trotted over, hoping if Ethan were to stumble, he would be there to help.

It was hard not to get distracted when Ethan was wearing a pair of gray, tight-fitting skinny jeans, which only reminded Robert of how amazing it felt to have sex with him last night. At least Ethan was being careful on his way down, but the wobbly ladder wasn’t making Rob feel any more confident.

He bit his lip and grabbed the lower end of the ladder to stabilize it, but it also provided him with the opportunity to look up at the shapely ass and slim thighs. He’d love to sleep with his head buried between those.

Thanks to the weather being milder than in the past few days, Ethan didn’t have to wear a jacket, and he only had a black hoodie. As soon as he was at arm’s length, Rob pulled him back into an embrace before Ethan’s shoulder bag could hit him on the head. Ethan had gained weight since leaving the hospital, but to Robert, he still seemed so frail sometimes, like he would break if he tripped. The black hair, which had been a mess just hours ago, now was all straight, neat, and smelled of that amazing bergamot shampoo that Rob had come to associate with Ethan. He hugged him tightly, gathering a fistful of the sweet-smelling mane. The kiss that started out of nowhere made him feel like it had been ages since he last tasted Ethan’s lips, but they couldn’t linger right at the gates of the enemy.

“L-let’s go?”

Ethan nodded, but stood on his toes for one more kiss. Glints of glitter still lingered in his hair. “Yeah, I want to get out of here.”

Rob exhaled, smiling at Ethan as he squeezed his hand. Without a word, he started running back between the trees, away from the threat of detection and closer to the safety of his car. He wanted to scream with joy.

“I’m so happy you came to get me. I’m sick of that place so much,” Ethan moaned as soon as they got to the car. Robert pushed him against the door and molded their bodies together, opening Ethan’s sweet mouth with a deep kiss. His body was a warehouse of fireworks, ready to crackle every time he was near Ethan.

Within seconds, Ethan’s arms were around his neck, and his lips opened in invitation. He gently petted Rob’s nape and rubbed his thigh against Rob’s. That alone was enough to start giving Rob a hard-on. He remembered how pliant Ethan’s body was, how Ethan encouraged him to come inside its tightness.

“Oh, God, baby,” he whispered, squeezing his hands over Ethan’s waist. His body was getting worked up, and that couldn’t happen here. “We need to go.”

Ethan gave Rob’s neck one last kiss and suckle before withdrawing. “Take me wherever you want.” He looked up at Rob with that single piercing blue eye.

Robert sighed and staggered backward, opening the door for Ethan. “Yeah, let’s go. They might find out you’re gone,” he said, walking around the car.

Ethan quickly got in and threw his bag to the back seat. “Fuck them. I hope they do, and I hope they worry. I had the worst fight with them.”

“What happened? Why did you tell them about us after all?” asked Rob, starting the car and driving to the highway as quickly as he could without breaking any traffic regulations.

Ethan buckled his seat belt without prompting and looked up at Rob with a deep breath. “It got out of hand. They locked my workspace, and I went ballistic. So I told them they can’t do this, they can’t keep me from doing what I want. One word led to another, and I told them we were dating, ‘cause I knew it would piss them off. Another thing they have no control over. It made me feel a little bit better to see their outraged faces.”

Robert smiled. He knew he shouldn’t after Ethan’s parents have been so nice to him, but this time, they were wrong. “No, they can’t stop me from seeing you.”

Ethan reached out to him and stroked his arm. “They can’t. It’s ridiculous. They treat me like a child. It only opened my eyes about how sick I am of being told what to do and feeling inadequate about my passion.”

“So, what do you want to do?” Robert brushed his thumbs over the steering wheel.

“I want to grow my business, learn more about the craft, be a better artist. They tried to guilt-trip me about college, complaining that they offered to pay for it. I don’t want them to pay for it because I don’t want to go to law school. It’s not for me. So I decided.” He took a deep breath. “I’m not going to college.”

Robert frowned at the road. This conversation was taking a sudden turn for the serious. “Why?”

“It’s just a big debt. And for what? There are so many ways to learn if you’re doing art. Tutorials on the Internet, shorter courses, meeting crafters. Most of what I know about taxidermy, I learned from Herbert, and he taught me for free. I could move to Seattle and meet people there. If my parents hadn’t locked my workspace, I could finish my commission for that store in L.A.” Ethan seemed to be speaking calmly, but at the end of the last  sentence, he took a deep breath, and when Rob shot a glance at him, he saw tears streaking down the smooth cheek.

He drew in a sharp breath. Maybe this wasn’t the best time to get into serious discussions about the future so he settled on trying to calm down his boyfriend. “Okay, I get it. It’s terrible, but let them think on it. Maybe you could negotiate.”

Ethan got a tissue to rub the tears off his face. “What can I negotiate? They’re dead set on unlocking my workspace only after graduation, and I’m not giving you up either.”

Robert bit his lip. “You know, maybe they don’t understand how serious you are. I’m sure they’ll come round.”

Ethan sniffed and looked down at his knees, hiding his face behind the curtain of  hair. His shoulders trembled with every breath he took.

“Ethan, please don’t cry. I can’t even do anything when I drive,” uttered Rob, doing his best to focus on the traffic. He was a bit overwhelmed by the new responsibility of taking care of a distressed lover.

“I’m sorry… I just feel like such a failure. I won’t be able to deliver on my promise to that store, and everyone will know I’m unreliable, and no one will order from me anymore. I’m so embarrassed, and it’s all their fault.” Ethan didn’t look back, but the tissues were hard at work.

Robert gave a shuddery breath. “You could e-mail them, write that you have a family emergency and ask for an extended commission time.”

“You think they would have me after I blow a deadline?” Ethan finally looked up at him, with his eye all red.

“Well, it’s a small store, not a huge corporation. It’s people like you and me. I’m sure anybody can understand that sometimes shit just happens. Why not try?” Rob smiled at Ethan, hoping this could brighten up his mood. Seeing Ethan smile back was like a soothing menthol balm all over his forehead.

“Maybe I could try that. You’re right.”

Robert went weak with relief. He felt almost guilty that he found the teary smile on Ethan’s face beautiful. Hot even. He wanted nothing more than to curl up with him in the backseat.

After about a half-hour drive, they turned into a small road, deep in the woods, and Rob hoped to find a good secluded spot for them. It took another ten minutes, but finally he stopped between the bushes, close to a lake they could see between the trees.

The moment they stopped, Ethan unbuckled his seat belt and went straight for a hug. “Thank you for coming. I needed this so much,” he whispered before kissing Rob’s cheek.

Rob relaxed into the seat and pulled him closer. They would be safe here. “Have you switched off your phone?”

“I didn’t even take it with me.” Ethan smiled into Robert’s lips before closing in for another kiss. “I don’t need to call anyone when I have you here.”

Rob’s heart exploded with warmth. He gently petted the top of Ethan’s head and squeezed his hand. “You want to move to the back?” A promise of arousal overcame his body as soon as those words left his mouth.