Dirty Ties (20 page)

Me: too risky?

Collin: Does he know who you are?

Me: don’t think so

Collin: Be careful hooker

Me: always punk

Collin didn’t judge me. He never did, but we lived and worked in a society of double standards. Very few would bat an eye at a man who crawled from one bed to another, because
Oh, men are just horny. They need to fuck and spread their seed.

But what was the general perception of a woman who sucked a man’s cock and five nights later went home with a different man? A skank? A whore? A shallow slut?

How many of those so-called sluts were simply lonely? Searching for a meaningful connection in a smile or an embrace or an orgasm? How many were hoping to find a
forever
connection?

It took courage and confidence to put yourself out there, to swallow the rejection and hurt that would undoubtedly come, then go right back out there and try again.

I wanted to be one of those brave women with the whole of my heart, but my circumstances were snarled with restrictions. Even if I found
forever
in a one-night stand
,
I couldn’t keep it.

I held that thought at the surface as I strode through the exit. But the moment I stepped outside, the ugly seed of insecurity lodged in my throat. What if he changed his mind and left? Or never planned to wait at all?

It was unseasonably warm for September in Chicago, and I hadn’t brought a coat. As I turned to glance down the street, a soft suede jacket was slung over my shoulders.

His gorgeous face filled my view, haloed by the glow of the streetlights. Relief settled over me, curling my lips.

He gripped my hand. "Let's roll."

His long-legged strides ate up the sidewalk, and I struggled to keep up with him.

“In a hurry, Logan?” My feet burned in the heels, but I jogged to catch up to his side. “Where are we going?”

With his hold on my hand, he tugged me into the next alcove and pinned my back against the stone veneer. He braced his elbows on the wall on either side of my head. The weight of his body pressed into mine, shooting my heart rate from zero to ninety.

He lowered his head, and his lips traced my jaw, lingering on the sensitive spot below my ear. A shiver ran through me. The good kind of shiver that relaxed my muscles and returned me to my prior state of blissful attraction.

His tongue circled my ear lobe, drawing it into his mouth. He sucked on the diamond stud Collin had given me, lapping and biting, and released it before I gave into a fit of ticklish laughter.

“We’re going to a hotel.” He nodded his head at the door beside me.

The sign above it read
The Bells Hotel.

Oh. It took me by surprise. Maybe because I didn’t know a hotel was here. Maybe because I assumed we would be going back to his place. “Do you live—?”

“I’m just passing through for the night.”

Another surprise. But thinking on it, we hadn’t talked, hadn’t shared any personal information. I glanced up into his stunning eyes. “Where are you from?”

He shifted his weight to one leg, his body surrounding me, his expression unreadable. “Look. You’re…” His eyes drifted over me from my lips to my legs, his pupils dilating, his jaw clenching. “You’re fucking gorgeous. Sexiest damned woman I’ve ever met.”

My chest filled with warmth even though I knew there was a
but
coming.

He rubbed the back of his neck. “But all we’ve got is one night. And I don’t want to spend a second of that time talking. Can you handle that?”

I wanted to laugh, but that would’ve been self-depreciating and pathetic. My sexual history was a compilation of one nights. One night was all I would ever have.

Hooking a finger in his belt loop, I dragged him to me. “I’ve got this.”

My voice sounded certain. My rational mind wasn’t so sure.

My head pounded, my thoughts growing heavier with every step toward the hotel room. Somewhere between my
All we’ve got is one night
declaration and the short elevator ride, the mood had shifted. The charged attraction that had pulled us together in the club agitated into an abject hum, straining the inches between us as we walked. She was nervous.

I picked up the pace, flipping the key card between my fingers, every cell in my body gravitating toward her. She hadn’t spoken a word since we entered the lobby, her silence a hulking, awkward presence, which was crazy after the effortless way we’d melded on the dance floor.

Was she on the verge of changing her mind? If I touched her, took her hand in mine, would it push her over the edge? Make her run?

She’d said she wasn’t interested in that douche—What was his name?—Holden. His smarmy smile screamed male escort, which would’ve been an easy solution for Trent. Maybe she’d picked up on his phoniness. Or maybe she wasn’t in the habit of picking up men.

Except she didn’t seem to have any reservations about sucking a man’s cock in an elevator. I clenched my teeth. Evidently, she was good at not getting caught.

So was she worried about being seen in a hotel with a guy who wasn’t her husband? But I’d already checked into the room earlier that evening, and we hadn’t passed a single person in the small, empty hotel.

She had to be stewing about something else. General nervousness about sleeping with a stranger? Reservations about cheating? Or worry that one night wouldn’t be enough?

All of the above scrambled my own head. My palms slicked, and my stomach hollowed with turmoil, curdling with the enormity of what I was going to do. The setup, the cameras, the betrayal that would be delivered to her father-in-law tomorrow.

The betrayal that would be in her eyes when she found out.

My skin tightened, and a burning lump swelled in my throat. I didn’t want to be in this position. Christ, I didn’t want to hurt her.

As I walked beside her, seeing my jacket smother her slender frame, a fierce protectiveness simmered through me. Trent had forced my hand, gave me no choice but to go against my ethics to help her commit adultery, all because I couldn’t stomach the thought of anyone else doing it.

Another feeling tunneled through me, a hunger pulling at my insides. I wanted to lead her to the room under different circumstances, where there were no secrets, where I could explore her without pretense and get to know the woman on the Ducati.

That was the feeling I latched onto, the one my mind and body wouldn’t fight. I ached for her, wanted her more than I’d ever wanted anyone, and for one night, she was mine.

“This is it.” I stopped at the end of the hall, swiped the key card, and held the door open.

She stood on the threshold and stared at the room behind me. I’d left all the lights on, and now the illumination cast a glow over her beautiful face.

Despite the oversized jacket swallowing her shoulders and trepidation radiating from her pores, she looked startlingly mature, so smart and sexually confident in her vintage dress. The fabric followed her curves, classy not skanky, the high neckline tastefully concealing what I already knew were perfectly-shaped tits.

She was so unlike the uncultured, attention-seeking twenty-somethings I fucked and forgot. Her current uncertainty aside, she was an accomplished woman, with the education and experience to match her million-dollar salary. Combine that with the vibrant blonde hair tumbling over her shoulders, the creamy smooth skin of her angelic face, her knock-out figure, and she was staggering in her beauty.

And hesitant. I glanced back at the yellowing wallpaper, the dated bedspread, and the worn maroon carpet. Maybe this place was too low-rent for her affluent tastes?

No, she didn’t strike me as the kind of woman who cared about that shit. Not like her mother. But what
did
she care about?

Her hands slid down the front of her dress, pressing against her flat stomach, the curves of her chest heaving against the fabric, stretching it. She nibbled on her bottom lip, her blue eyes focused inward, so deep and full of thought they sucked me in, made me want to learn everything about her for reasons that had nothing to do with her family.

She glanced down the uninhabited hall. The quaint hotel had three floors and maybe twenty rooms total, and the clerk had mentioned I had the third floor to myself this evening. She could scream my name through the walls, and no one would hear.

My God, just thinking about that wrenched my gaze to her mouth. A sinful mouth that had haunted me since that night in the elevator.

As I watched her, everything I wanted to know—including things I never knew I craved—stretched out in the depth of her gaze. Her worries, her desires, her painful beauty swirled in a mesmerizing dance of complexity, one I had no hope of untangling in the short span of a single night.

Her eyes shifted back to the room, connecting with mine. “I know talking isn’t on the agenda, but I…” She drew in a breath, released it. “I need to tell you something.”

My heart skipped. Tell me what? That she was married? Shit, maybe she would expose something crucial, or maybe—if I was really lucking up here—she would unload everything, and I could skip the whole CEO charade.

I held her gaze with a patient, open expression, even as logic told me she would never reveal her secrets to a stranger.

She stepped into the room, just enough for me to close the door behind her, and stopped against the wall, her looming disclosure buzzing between us.

Slipping my jacket off her shoulders, she set it and her purse on the chair beside her. “Okay.” She turned to face me, her shoulders squared and head tilted back. “I’m just going to say it.”

Christ, the way she looked at me, so many layers working in her eyes, none of which I could read, but whatever she was thinking, I knew it centered on me. My body tingled with expectation.

“I like you. I mean…” Lips parted, her half-lidded eyes swept over my body and returned to my face. “God, I love the way you watch me, the way you touch me.” She leaned against the wall, tucking her hands behind her back, arousal flushing her pretty cheeks. “Your mouth, the feel of your tongue against mine, your kiss.”

I licked my lips, my cock swelling with each husky word. “It’s all yours. All night.”

Her ravishing smile reached deep inside me, pulling me toward her with shocking force. My feet closed the distance, my body covering hers, my arms braced against the wall, trapping her.

She reached up and fingered the buttons on my shirt, not freeing them, just fidgeting, tormenting, her smile waning. “I don’t do this sort of thing without…” She cleared her voice and forced her eyes to mine. “For reasons I won’t get into, I always require an investigation and non-disclosure agreement.”

My gut clenched, but with an incredible amount of effort, I kept my face relaxed and impassive as I stared down at her. She just admitted she slept around and did so with a contract. Evidently, her romp with Evader had been exempt from paperwork since she thought I couldn’t see her face.

I wanted to believe our moment in the elevator had been significant to her, that whatever it was crackling between us was unique. Her non-disclosure bullshit crushed that notion, which made what I was about to do a hell of a lot easier. Her involvement at Trenchant aside, she was here by choice, cheating on her husband by her own free will.

She flattened her hand over my tense-as-hell chest. “Tonight…
this…
is really impulsive for me, so I’m… I guess I’m asking for your word that you won’t ever use it against me.” She swallowed, her voice small and unsure. “Please.”

My mouth dried. She assumed I didn’t know who she was, and of course, she knew there was a good chance I’d figure it out down the road. I could recognize her photo somewhere and sell the sordid details of our affair to the tabloids.

I couldn’t fault her for being cautious, even if it wouldn’t help her this time.

The sour tang of guilt hit the back of my throat. I swallowed it down with memories of my mother, her warmth and patience, her easy smile, and her tough love.

Kaci’s family had taken her from me, left me without a single living family member. The boys’ home hadn’t been terrible, but Jesus, I’d missed her. Still did.

I needed to stop Trenchant Media from destroying any more lives.

Smoothing the guilt and grief from my face, I leaned down and kissed her cheek. “Don’t care who you are”—I pressed my lips to her other cheek—“or what you’re hiding. I just want to bury myself inside you for the next however many hours.”

She sighed beneath my train-wreck of falsehoods and truths. When this was all over, hopefully I would walk away with some semblance of integrity still intact.

I bent my knees and flexed my hips against hers, tracing my nose along her neck and filling my insides with the honeyed scent of her skin. “Tonight is our secret. You have my word.”

The lie burned my throat like acid, but it evaporated with the softening of her body against mine. No matter how much shit I fed her tonight, I wouldn’t lie to myself.

It was impossible to deny the way she affected me. The rawness in her smile, the intelligence in her eyes, her undeniable beauty—Jesus, even the erotic way she rode her bike—made her the essence of my every fantasy.