Do Dead People Watch You Shower? (22 page)

No. We don’t.
We’re human; we’re not expected to be saints. We can just live with knowing that those souls are paying for what they did to us. It is my belief that on the Other Side we will forgive, but I’m not going to try to convince someone on this side, who is still in the body and still dealing with the pain that this is the case. When we get over there, we’ll each have our own experiences. Until then, we have to do our best to try to live as fully and well as we can without putting the burden of sainthood on ourselves.

I believe there
are many levels on the Other Side. These levels have a definite connection to the way we led our lives here and to the advancing stages of our spiritual growth. There are different levels of accomplishment and understanding. The superior soul of God is the pinnacle.

Everyone we meet
in our lives we have met before. Everyone who comes in and out of our lives we have known before. It could have been a very brief meeting or relationship because the meeting was only to facilitate getting you from point A to point B, or the lesson in the relationship was learned quickly. Someone might be a gas station attendant you barely know in this life and be your brother in the next life. There is a deep knowing in all of us but normally we move right along without recognizing these things. Still, in the core of our being, something recognizes these truths. It’s not a bad idea, every now and then, to stop and think about someone you’ve met and consider who that person might really be to you. I think we would treat one another a lot better if we did consider that the person next to you on the subway might have been a dear relative in another life.

I honestly don’t
know if each person has the same Masters. I don’t know who the Masters are. I know that they are very “evolved” energy. To explain what I mean by “evolved,” I always say it’s like someone who has completed grade school, high school, college, and graduate school; they have their master’s and their doctorate. You expect one thing from someone who has completed fourth grade. You expect a lot more from someone who is better educated, with advanced degrees. Different Master souls help with different difficult situations.

Absolutely not. I’m
not afraid of death, I’m afraid only of how I will die. I am human and it’s only normal. Going home and going back to the Other Side is not something to fear. I don’t have any fear whatsoever about meeting my father and brother, who are there before me, and my other relatives who I have long since forgotten. I’ve heard of them and I know they are there. I’m not afraid of death, but I’m afraid of being alone and not having someone to love me here. John is half of my life. I have no children of my own so John and I have become such a “unit” together. Like most people, I fear being alone and unloved. On some level, I’m ashamed of this fear. I should know better. I meet so many brave people who have lost their spouses and I admire them because so often I think about what I would do in their position. Sometimes the fear is so great that it makes me wish I would die first. It’s a selfish thought, but it’s true.

Yes, I’ve worked
with the police a few times. Once the police in a nearby town could not find a young man after searching for a few weeks. A detective in Cedar Grove, New Jersey, called and asked me if I could tell her if the young man had died. I said yes. I was told that he was dead, he was in a car, and he was in water. I also heard that they would find him in “two.” Whether that meant two days, two weeks, or two months I couldn’t tell. But they found him in two weeks, under a bridge. He had driven his car off the bridge and drowned.

Another time the police called about a young man who had disappeared without a trace. I told them that this young man was alive, but there were drugs involved in his disappearance. I heard that they would find him in “three.” Three days later, he called home from a crack house in Los Angeles.

I do a lot of work in Mexico and there are a lot of missing persons there. I haven’t worked with the police there, but I have done readings for people who have lost family members and may not know if their loved ones are alive or dead.

I’ll be honest,
I don’t watch much television, but I always think it is fantastic when Hollywood works with those who actually have the gift to help to portray the experience in a way that feels legitimate and respectful.

In the past, television shows and movies did a lot of crap that was entertaining ( people coming back from the dead covered in blood and all that stuff) but was not how the dead really come through. They’re not interested in terrorizing and tormenting the living. They come through very peacefully and their intention is purely to give messages and try to help those on this side. They especially seem to get it right on
Medium
and I think Patricia Arquette really understands what it is to be born with my gift. You can tell that chick did her research.

Mostly I feel
extremely lucky to have been blessed with this ability. But it can be difficult, especially, as I’ve said, at bedtime. I hear them walking up and down stairs, laughing and talking. They are always all around me. But if I ever really need peace and quiet, I do have the ability to say, very simply, “Please, in the name of God, be gone.” I will say this only when I feel the need to be quiet and by myself. At those times, this call for God’s protective love is enough to still the voices. But I’ve become so used to this connection that I sometimes have a hard time staying on this side. At night sometimes I will astral-travel and leave my body to go visit the Other Side. When I’m there, I always want to stay, but my father and my brother always tell me I have to come back. I’m not finished with my work on this side.

Astral-travel is the
act of a soul leaving its body to visit the Other Side. Our souls can leave our bodies either by slipping out through our feet or by lifting up when we are lying flat on our backs. When I plan to astral-travel, I fall asleep flat on my back so that it is easier for my soul to leave. My soul then stands in front of the window in my bedroom and I can step out into the Other Side. I
never
leave through my bedroom door because my hallway tends to be full of ghosts, usually either those who have visited with my clients that day or those who know that a loved one will be visiting me the next day and are showing up early. I just don’t want to see them when I’m in that state.

From my bedroom window I have seen the most beautiful scenes: snowcapped mountains that go on forever, beautiful beaches with the whitest sand and the bluest water, endless fields of flowers as far as the eye can see. When I step out into the Other Side, I step into another dimension. There are so many planes that I never know exactly what I will see. Most often I am floating in a white room with all of my relatives who have passed on.

No, no. Everyone
has stepped out of their bodies from time to time. Do you know the feeling when you are sleeping and you feel like you are falling out of bed? Or when you wake up and feel paralyzed and you try to scream and no sound comes out? In these cases, your soul has woken up before your body. When this happens you should visualize bringing your fingers together and think, “Please, God, bring my body back to my soul,” and you will wake up completely.

Oh, there are
so many parts of my job that I love. I love making sure people know there is life after death. I love getting across the message that we all belong to one another. I love telling my clients that the most important gesture in life and death is a smile.

I can tell
you a few things that I’ve learned as a person. I’ve learned to consider each moment precious and to not waste one, to not waste
anything
. I’ve learned to pick up litter, even if I’m not the one who dropped it, to keep this world as beautiful as it can be, even if it will never be as perfect as God made it. I’ve learned to keep a positive attitude and any time I’m feeling angry or at all sorry for myself for
any
reason to ring the bell and say, “Snap out of it, girlfriend.” Life is far too precious to waste moping.

As a medium, I’ve learned how important it is to step outside your own body—and I don’t mean astral-travel—and see what you are doing wrong. You don’t have to be a medium to do this. Anyone who is really interested in learning from his or her life can do this. Also, being a good listener is important. Listen to those you trust, whether it’s your mother, your sister, or your best friend—that person will be truly honest. The dead can be brutally honest, but it’s because they love us so deeply. It’s good to have these kinds of friends on both sides of the veil. If you really want to learn something, brutal honesty can be a very good thing.

To be honest,
I’m really not interested in knowing them. That is not what I choose to use my ability for. But I
do
know when I’m going to win a raffle! I love this story:

There’s a wonderful little family-owned restaurant in Boonton called Top of the Park—it’s run by a nice Italian couple and their two kids and the food is great. Every Easter they raffle off a huge Perugina chocolate egg. When I say huge, I mean
huuuuge
—this egg stands around five feet high! So one April I bought five raffle tickets for ten bucks. As I bought the tickets, I heard whispering—They are telling me that I’m going to win! So I said, “Joe, I’m gonna win this egg,” and he just laughed. I’m sure everyone says that. So I said, “When I win this egg, I’m going to share it with everyone.” He said, “Oh, that’s nice.” Of course, he didn’t believe I had any more chance than anyone else.

So the day comes and the priest does the drawing. He pulls out a ticket and reads out my name. Just like They told me, I won the egg. I didn’t forget what I’d told Joe—I had him get a hammer and we gave that egg a whack and shared chocolate with everyone in the restaurant.

That was all fine, everyone was happy. But then Joe got curious about my saying that I was going to win. He said, “Let’s just see who would have won if it wasn’t you, Concetta.” There were about 450 tickets in the bowl. He reached in and pulled another one out. My name was on it. Wow. That was quite a coincidence! We were all laughing. So then Joe reached in and pulled out another ticket. Oh my God. It was my name again! He reached in again, and for the fourth time—it was me! Now he was spooked—he didn’t want to pull again!

They don’t take
sides. They have no use for or attachment to any physical thing, and certainly not money. But this does come up in readings frequently. Sometimes they will express disappointment or they’ll ask me to tell my client to “let it go” if it’s something that has been troubling her. On the other hand, they’ll just as often refer to a specific item they used to own that they know my client has and they’ll say they’re glad she’s kept that thing. Or they’ll refer to the way their belongings were split up among the family and say how proud of their kids they are, that they went through that process without bickering or starting World War III. They don’t take sides, but they do give us points for good behavior.