Don’t Forget to Remember Me (52 page)

“No. Don’t worry. We get some rough people
here, but other times they’re just idiots. Tonight, someone got
pushed off of a roof while they were sparring, just playing around.
They don’t understand how dangerous that kind of injury can be. The
kid had a ruptured spleen and went to emergency surgery. If we
didn’t get it out, he would have died of internal bleeding. Stupid
fuckers.”

His scent enveloped me and I longed to melt
into his arms and feel safe, to know he was safe. I searched his
face for reassurance, but my heart constricted despite myself.

“Ryan, they look like a gang.”

“There are gangs in New York and every city,
baby. I’m just glad you work uptown.”

My eyes searched his. The blue depths were
intent despite the fatigue that lurked there.

“It’s adorable how you worry so much, but
there is no reason for it. I’m okay except I’m missing my wife so
much it hurts,” he said in his most velvet voice and I pressed my
face into his warm hand.

I smiled, taking in the dark circles beneath
his deep blue eyes. “Ryan, you’re so tired. I’m sorry.” I was more
at ease now that he was here beside me, but the men were still
watching us from a few yards away. Ryan didn’t seem to notice, his
focus was completely on me.

“I’m okay.” His thumb brushed over my bottom
lip and pulled it down slightly and his gaze dropped to my mouth.
“Give me some of that,” he smiled softly before his other hand
closed around my forearm and he pulled me toward him and his mouth
settled on mine in a gentle kiss.

I couldn’t help it, my mouth opened and my
own hands reached out to clutch at the front of his dark blue
button down between the opening of his black leather jacket. He’d
changed out of his scrubs for the flight and he was looking good
enough to eat. He responded by increasing the pressure of both his
mouth on mine and the hand holding my head. His thumb brushed back
and forth along my jaw as his tongue plundered my mouth. We kissed
deeply for a minute before his mouth lifted and then returned to
tease my lips in a series of sucking kisses.

“Jesus, you taste so good. Why does it feel
like I never fucking see you?” he said and kissed me one more
time.

“Maybe because you never fucking see me,” I
quipped in return and he groaned, his mouth reaching for mine
again, but I rested my forehead against his, denying him the kiss
he was seeking.

“Baby, I could kiss you forever, but we’re
going to miss our plane. Besides, those goons are still eyeing us,
and they scare me.” I reached up and brushed my fingers along his
jaw and then up to push the hair back off of his brow. “We should
go.” I moved more fully into my seat and put the car in gear.

“Don’t be scared. I won’t let anything hurt
you, sweetheart.”

“The only thing that hurts me lately is the
lack of time with you.”

His mouth twisted and he frowned, pulling
the seatbelt down and buckling it.

“Um hmm, and here I thought getting married
and moving in together was going to make things easier,” he said
apologetically. His hand reached out and his warm fingers closed
around mine, lifting my hand to his mouth to brush his lips across
the inside of my wrist. His touch always set my body on fire and my
heart thudded in my chest.

“Mmm… well, I’m thankful for the time we do
have together. This weekend will be hectic, but at least we’ll be
together for 72 hours. I want to make sure that you get some rest
tonight.”

“Well, I want to make sure I get some lovin’
from my gorgeous wife,” he said with a devilish grin. “Lots and
lots of lovin’.” He turned in his seat and looked at me seriously
as I navigated my way through the city.

“Ryan, what is it?”

“I know this weekend is about Aaron and
Jenna, but I want some time for just us, if we can manage it. I
really miss your words and just being with you. Alone.”

I knew what he meant. He was my best friend
in the world and we were closer than any couple I’d ever seen.
Lately, we hardly saw each other and when we did, we were so
desperate for the physical connection we devoured each other.
Rarely did we have time to go out and do anything together, instead
we opted to closet ourselves away from the world and soak up as
much love as we could in the short time we had. His eyes were sad
and I desperately wanted to see him smile.

“Oh? I remember now, it’s my words you can’t
live without. Not my body, right?” I cocked my head and raised my
eyebrow. It worked.

Ryan laughed and squeezed my hand. I knew by
his response that he remembered the conversation that I was
referring to. “That’s right. I’ll be completely miserable making
love all night if I can’t talk to you first.”

“Yeah, right. Okay, then, I’ll make sure to
throw out the new lingerie I bought for this weekend when we get to
the hotel.”

Ryan sobered, his thumb rubbing back and
forth over the hand that he held. “I love you, Julia,” he said
seriously. “I do want to talk to you. I want to find out what’s
going on… but I’ll love that you think about me that way. You
always know just what I need.”

“Because you mean everything to me. Even if
I can’t see you so much, I wouldn’t trade one second of my life
with you. I love you.” I threw a glance and a small bittersweet
smile at him before returning my focus back on the traffic.

Since my accident, there were times when
he’d get deep and brooding, withdrawing into himself when he
remembered the way he suffered when I almost died nine months
before. I was sometimes amazed by how much it still affected him.
I’d learned to recognize it by the look in his deep blue eyes and
the silence in which he’d cloaked himself. The pain that flitted
across his perfect features from time to time ripped at my heart
and I wanted to make it vanish forever. As much as we loved each
other, we no longer took any of our time together for granted,
having seen how precarious life could be and how much we needed
each other.

My throat tightened as I tried to speak. As
usual, he could read me like a book. My emotions and my thoughts
all laid bare to him.

“I never want to go through something like
that again.” The pain in his voice was still so prevalent whenever
he spoke of it and I wondered if he realized that had I not been in
that accident, we’d have a month old baby by now. Despite the
happiness we shared, despite my memory being fully restored, he
still held that pain so close to him. We both still suffered, but
Ryan had endured so much more during the time when I didn’t
remember the past, the baby, or what he called our mad, mad love.
It still got to me; I’d been so freaking oblivious to his
suffering.

My heart thumped loudly in my chest
remembering the night it all came rushing back when he had poured
out his pain as I had poured out mine. Every precious moment
brought us closer. It seemed impossible that anyone could love this
much.

“Babe, I know. I love you so much.” My voice
trembled and my eyes welled slightly. I fought back the tears
forming as we drove in silence, our hands laced together. I could
feel his eyes boring into my profile so I turned my face toward
him. “I have a surprise for you later,” I said softly and his eyes
met mine and the corner of his mouth lifted in the crooked smile
that always took my breath away.

“In addition to the lingerie?” he asked.
When I nodded, he smiled even bigger. “I have one for you as
well.”

“Really? Tell me what it is,” I said
anxiously, the mood suddenly lighter.

“Not a chance,” Ryan said shortly but with a
wide grin. “If I have to suffer, so do you.”

“Mmmm.”

“Julia, do we have to meet up with the
others tonight? I don’t want to. Not tonight.”

“Ryan.” I shook my head at him in
exasperation. “Yes. Your parents are here and we’re meeting them
with Aaron and Jenna in the bar for drinks. We don’t have to stay
long, but we do have to go for a bit. Aren’t you anxious to see
them? It’s been six months and you’re the best man.”

“I suppose I should be, but I just want to
get you alone and wrap myself around you all night. I don’t give a
damn if it’s selfish.”

“We can get some wine. It will help you
relax so you can sleep tonight. When we go back to the room, I’ll
run you a bath and give you a massage. We’ll just visit with them
for a little while. We’ll have plenty of time to be alone.”

“Okay,” he said begrudgingly, his lower lip
extending in a slight pout. My heart leapt at the adorable gesture,
and the obvious emotions behind it. His desire to be alone together
only echoed my need to have his arms around me. “But I disagree.
There is never enough time to be alone with you. I feel like I
haven’t touched you in forever.”

“You’re touching me now.”

“You know what I mean, Julia. I want to make
love to you. I need to lose myself inside you.” I drew in a deep
breath as his voice reverberated in several waves of electricity.
Yes, I knew what he meant. I craved his touch like air. “I want
you. Every second.” The tone of his voice lowered huskily.

“It’s only been four days,” I said in an
attempt to offer comfort. The fact that I was aware of how long it
had been since we’d last been together was not lost on him and his
hand tightened around mine.

His schedule was so erratic that we rarely
were home together at the same time and when we were, he was beat.
I ‘d had to insist that he sleep.

“Four days too long.”

*****

I watched Julia from a few feet away at the
far end of our group. My parents had reserved four tables along one
side of the room near the band. She was laughing with Ellie and
Jen, their faces full of animation and their eyes full of light
that was visible even in the dimly lit room. Thank God we were able
to check in and take a quick shower before we’d been required to
come down to socialize.

I cringed and inwardly chastised myself. For
Christ’s sake! It was my only brother’s wedding. Even if we weren’t
related by blood, we were bound by life, love and experience. The
least I could do was come to life long enough to celebrate.

The girls’ tinkling laughter filtered down
from the end table where they huddled. Jenna’s younger sister,
Anna, her parents and two other couples along with my family, and
Ellie and Harris, rounded out the party.

I squinted in the direction of the people I
didn’t recognize, trying to place them. While they were vaguely
familiar, I couldn’t put names with the faces, and tonight, I was
too tired to try. I should have paid more attention when we first
arrived. I rubbed a hand over my face from my temples down over my
chin and scratched at the twenty-four hours worth of beard growth.
I hadn’t taken the time to shave after my shower and I was sorry
now. I had no desire to chafe Julia’s perfect alabaster skin, but
there was no way I wouldn’t be kissing all over her curves later.
My fingers played along my jaw as I judged how harsh it would feel
against her smooth flesh.

My mother’s hand traced over the muscles of
my back and brought me out of my personal thoughts and back into
the room around me. She was sitting on my right and my dad was on
the other side of Aaron. The two men were in deep conversation, a
concentrated frown on my brother’s face and one of wry amusement on
my father’s.

“Are you alright, Ryan? You look so tired.”
Mom’s voice floated around me. I turned toward her slightly and
covered her hand with my own, trying to reassure the worry out of
her voice and her expression.

“Sure, Mom. The hours are hellacious, but
I’m fine. It’s nothing that a few hours of sleep won’t cure.” I
lifted the corners of my mouth in the start of a crooked smile.

“Yes. I remember when your father went
through his residency. There were times when I barely saw him,” Mom
continued.

I groaned softly in protest. “Don’t remind
me.” My eyes snapped back to the gorgeous picture of my own bride,
giggling with her friends. Her voice sent little tingles through me
and found me wishing all to hell that we’d have been smart enough
to tell them that we couldn’t get in until the morning and snuck
off to some small hotel where we could be alone all night.

A good portion of porcelain skin on Julia’s
shoulders and back was open to view by the neckline of her deep
pinkish purple sweater. It did have long sleeves, but it was meant
to be provocative and it was. She must have felt my gaze because
her soft green eyes landed on mine followed by a half smile lifting
her soft lips. It was an innocent gesture and full of love, but
damn if my body didn’t tighten immediately in response. Those pouty
little lips, the lower one jutting out slightly before being
captured by her top teeth combined with those deep green pools
would be my undoing. I was so fucking hungry for her I could barely
restrain myself from hauling her up to the room. My eyes narrowed
and I smirked at her. She was well aware of the effect she had on
me. She knew it well, and milked it for every last drop. I loved
that shit.