Don't Wake Me if I'm Dreaming (36 page)

I quickly finish my drink, as the bartender slides me another.

I gulp it down and cringe from the burning sensation down my throat.

“What brings you here today?” He smiles, wiping a glass with a drying rag.

“Why do most people generally come here?”

“To socialize. I see that’s not your strength today.”

I didn’t answer.

“Point taken. Another?”

I nod, sliding him my glass.

“You’re welcome,” he says, exchanging drinks. “You’ll need to slow down after this one.”

“Say’s the pouring fountain.”

“You got me. That’s a really nice car,” he says, looking out the window.

“It’s my boyfriend’s.”

“He must be crazy about you or crazy in general. I’d never let my girlfriend drive my car if I owned that.”

“He doesn’t exactly know… or didn’t when I left.”

“You stole his car! Eh, you’re probably not his girlfriend for long. Man, I don’t want the cops coming in here.”

“He doesn’t know where I am, and I won’t be here much longer.”

I hear the door open, but don’t pay attention, noticing that someone else from within the bar is approaching. “What’s that you’re driving there?” A man asks, holding an empty pitcher.

“It’s a car!” I say, making it clear I don’t care to have another discussion about the damn thing.

He stares at me a moment. “How can someone so pretty be so ugly?”

“Excuse her. It’s a nine-eleven Porsche Carrera GTS with a burning hot engine,” Jack says to the man holding the pitcher, walking toward me with his cellphone. “GPS tracking on my car and from the smell of the engine, I can only assume how it’s possible you’re already drunk.”

“Well, I wouldn’t have stopped had I known I was being followed,” I say spitefully.

“We’re leaving now.” Jack reaches into his back pocket taking out his wallet.

“She already closed it out,” the bartender says, noticing Jack pulling out money.

Jack sets two fifty-dollar bills on the bar. “See to it that truck out there goes untouched and I’ll give you a hundred more when I return for it.”

The bartender reaches under the bar and lifts a shotgun just enough for us to see it. “Nobody will go near your truck.” He returned the gun under the bar, smiling.

The gust of wind returns moving us outside.

“What the hell were you thinking?” Jack asks.

I don’t answer him.

“Keys.”

I reach in my pocket and toss him the keys. “What?” I snap at his disappointed expression. “Oh, for cripes sake!” I retort, marching to the passenger side door.

“Seatbelt.” Jack commands, closing his door.

We vault back onto the highway. Intentionally, I avoid him, acting oblivious of his presence, but I can’t help noticing his anger is replaced with pain.

I exhale an annoyed sigh, relaxing my tense body into the seat. I reach, turning on the radio, but Jack turns it off.

“Aside from being returned to your car, you will never touch this car again.”

“Whatever,” I mumble.

Jack slows the vehicle while pulling off into a heavily wooded truck stop, parking alone at the far end.

“What are we doing here?” I ask.

He doesn’t respond as he sits, both hands gripping the wheel. His face is a shade darker than normal.

“Are you really that upset I took your car?”

“No, I’m not angry you took the car. I’m disappointed that your erratic behavior doesn’t seem to bother you as it should.”

We sit in silence, both thinking how to respond. Rain lightly drizzles against the windshield as the sky quickly turns dark and then begins pouring.

“Imagine driving home in this drunk,” he says.

Only the blur of the distant semi-trucks is visible as I stare out the window, waiting for it, the lecture.

“At what point did this become only your loss, Sasha? I was there too, and trust me it left a painful imprint…. I’ve waited stoically, allowing you to disarticulate every ounce of
our happiness we could’ve had together, and for what? It’s gotten me nowhere with you.”

He notices tears start falling from my eyes, as I wipe them away with my hands.

“There wasn’t a damn thing anyone could have done to save her. You have got to let it go.”

“Let it go? Jack, I was there and did nothing. I could have prevented the accident, and I didn’t do anything!”

“Is that what this is all about, you blaming yourself? It wasn’t your fault!”

“It was. I saw it before it happened. I knew he was coming, that he couldn’t stop the car in time, and I did nothing!” My voice was shy of yelling.

Jack quickly unbuckles his seatbelt and climbs out from the car into the rain, rushing to my door. I watch as he yanks it open, reaches in, unbuckling my seatbelt. Grabbing both my arms, he pulls me from my seat then forcefully pins me against the car. “Why can’t you see this isn’t your fault?” He frees one of his hands from my arm, wiping the rain from his face then places his hands supporting my face. “You saved that little boy’s life. He’s alive because of you. You saved him!”

“His mom is dead because of me. You don’t understand I could have saved her!”

“You reacted and saved the first life you saw in danger. That was the most selfless and heroic thing I’ve ever seen, running in front of a speeding car to save a life. Trust me when I say Aimee would have willingly given her life to save her son, as any mother would have. She wouldn’t be able to live with herself had it been he who died!”

I free my face from his hands and bury it into his chest crying, almost unable to breath.

Jack’s arms grip me, holding me firmly against his body. “I will help you get through this, but you have got to pull yourself together if we’re going to survive this.”

“I’m so sorry,” I cry. “I never meant to cause you pain.”

I woke, horrified, knowing I had no choice other than to pack my camping gear and find a way to save Aimee’s life.

***

I
pulled behind Vance’s car and parked.
This is it.
I thought to myself, taking an exceptionally deep breath.
I examined the road and surrounding forest before getting out of the car. I grabbed Charlie’s leash and connected it to his collar, then walked him over to the guardrail remembering Aimee and Vance standing here in my dream. I swallowed hard and took another deep breath, then hiked down the trail toward the campground.

“Look what the cat drug in. Glad you decided to join us,” Vance said, meeting me mid trail.

I forced a smile.

Vance reached down to pet Charlie, glancing at me. “You okay?”

“Yeah, I’m just not entirely in camp mode yet, but I’ll get there. Did you by chance buy bug bombs, Raid, maybe bug strips?”

He shook his head laughing. “We have mosquito and tick repellent.”

“Ugh. Come on, fat boy.” I gave Charlie’s leash a light tug to get his nose out of the bushes.

“Scott will be glad to see you guys. He’s been asking all morning when Charlie would be here.”

I tossed Vance my keys. “Everything’s in the trunk,” I said, getting a whiff of air. “Aimee must be cooking. I smell burnt bacon.”

“Nobody has the talent to burn bacon just right, the way she can. I’ll grab your stuff and get your tent set up.” 

“Thanks!” I laughed, agreeing.

I followed the steep sloping trail to the campground and absorbed the surrounding scenery when reaching the bottom. Every detail was as I remembered in my dreams, except the yellow tent, which would soon be pitched. Aimee was standing at a picnic table with a camp stove cooking breakfast and Scott was playing in the dirt with a stick.

“Charlie!” Scott ran to us as fast as his feet could carry him but stopped short of me to hug Charlie first.

“Hi, sweet boy.” I ruffled his hair.

“You’re alive.” Aimee smiled and tossed Charlie a piece of bacon.             

“Yes, I—”

“I saw fwog.” Scott tugged at my leg, interrupting me.

“Did you catch it?” I asked, trying to calm myself as I glanced at the smoldering fire pit.

Aimee spoke up. “Eww no, he’ll get warts. We don’t touch icky frogs, do we, Scott?”

“Oh, you’re awful to deprive him of so much fun.” I leaned over Scott, “Aunty Sash has enough frogs at home to share the next time you come over.”

“What are you telling him?”

“That his dad was once a frog. Scott, did you know your dad was once a frog, actually a toad?” I asked, letting Charlie off the leash.

“Ribbit-ribbit,” Vance croaked, setting my camping supplies on a tarp, and then grabbed us each a beer out of the cooler.

“Your dad was a frog when your mom met him, and she actually kept him.”

“Yep. True story,” he agreed.

Scott looked at his dad. “
Nooo hims
not
fwog
.”

“Oh, but he was. You see, your mom found him in a dirty-dirty pond.” I popped open my beer. “He was the ugliest, slimiest, smelliest, wart-covered frog she’d ever seen. But being the pretty sweet princess she was, she couldn’t let him go back in the pond to be eaten by the alligators. She felt sorry for him, so she cleaned him up and promised him she would take care of him forever.”

Scott’s eyes grew wide.

“Yep, once he was all cleaned up, she thought he was sooo cute, she kissed him, and magically he turned into her husband. And as long as he promised to love her forever and no other princesses, he would never turn back into a frog. There was only one small problem though. He. Never. Stopped. Eating. Flies.” I poked Scott’s tummy.

“
Okey dokey
, that’s enough you two, no filling his head with rubbish,” Aimee said as she piled eggs, burnt bacon, and fried potatoes onto everyone’s plates. “Eat up before it gets cold.”

Scott began jumping through the campground on his hands and feet, “
Wibbit- Wibbit
.”

“Nice one,
puta
.” Aimee pointed the spatula at me.

“You can clean him up for breakfast.” I sat on the picnic table picking at my food. “So. Camping.” I exhaled a drawn out sigh. “We’re doing this why?”

“Because fresh air will do us all good and it’s good for Charlie to spend time outside.”

“Oh, for shit sake, I bought a house so that he can have a huge lot to run around.” I reached down sneaking him burnt bacon. “You’re not deprived of anything, are you, fat boy?”

Aimee smiled. “Just go with it. You’re here, it’s a beautiful day, we’re all together, and there’s a nice lake down the path a ways.”

“Lake?” I accidently inhaled a slice of potato, then immediately coughed, gasping for air.

Aimee hurried to my side and patted my back. “You don’t have to inhale your food. I made plenty.”

“I’m fine and dandy,” I said in a gasping choking voice. “I’m fine, I just swallowed wrong.” I worked a moment to clear my throat and catch my breath, taking a drink from my beer. “A lake, splendid idea,” I lied, coughing again.

“It’s so beautiful and unspoiled, and there’s a walking path, too.” Aimee sat back down.

“I brought a raft do some fishing. You ladies can burn up some freshly caught dinner tonight,” Vance said rather enthusiastically as he slipped Charlie his burnt bacon. 

“Quit yer bellyaching. You scarfed that bacon down.” Aimee pointed at Vance, looking at his plate.

He and I shared a brief smirk.

Aimee and I cleaned up the breakfast mess as Vance set up my tent, and then we headed down to the lake, the same lake from my dream. We followed the path I was more than familiar with. I looked for the cloud that typically lingered, but was perfectly content not finding it.

“So,” Aimee said making conversation. “Vance recently had drinks with Matt at Henry’s. It was the first time they saw each other in a while.”

“Really.” I smiled. “How is he? I haven’t heard from him in, oh, months,” I spoke more to Vance, but Aimee replied.

“He’s doing well. He said he has a new girlfriend. I was surprised to hear he was finally moving on.”

“I’m not. He deserves to be happy. I’m happy for him,” I said with all sincerity.

“He said she’s all for the idea of having a family.”

“Well, I’m just glad it won’t be me that has to push those things out of my…”

Aimee shook her head no, glancing between Scott and me. “Radar ears.”

“Anyway, congratulations to him, I hope she’s everything he wants her to be.”

“You’re so hard headed. I don’t understand your distaste for a family. You’re absolutely awesome with Scott. I could picture you as a mom.” I didn’t think she realized she was glaring.

“I don’t know her do I, his girlfriend?”

Vance answered. “No, they knew each other in high school, guess she moved back here a few months before they started dating.”

Aimee quickly jumped in. “You’re changing the subject. You two would make gorgeous babies! If you got back together.”