Authors: Kris Waldherr
295 BCE
fter the demise of Alexander the Great in 323 BCE, most of his surviving relatives lost their lives as they scrambled after the crumbs of his empire. One notable exception was Alexander’s half sister Thessalonike.
How did Thessalonike escape being served death on a platter when so many others could not? Perhaps it was because she hardly knew Alexander—Thessalonike was only a small child when her big brother took off to conquer the world. It could also be because she was the daughter of Philip II’s mistress Nicesipolis. Nicesipolis died soon after Thessalonike’s birth in 342 BCE, leaving the girl to be raised by Olympias. As incredible as it sounds, Alexander’s mother felt affection for Thessalonike and taught her the ways of Dionysus. At the very least, Olympias did not judge the girl an impediment to her worldly ambitions.
However, though Thessalonike made it past the first round of eliminations, she did not survive the second.
Upon Alexander’s death, Thessalonike took refuge with her stepmother, Olympias, against Cassander, who grabbed Alexander’s throne. Several years later, Cassander finally had the cojones to dispatch Olympias, but he granted a different fate to Thessalonike: He married her. Their union in 315 BCE gave the new king’s reign a legitimacy it previously lacked.
After going through so much, you would think that Thessalonike had it made. From an illegitimate birth, she had climbed the ladder of royal success to become queen of it all. Presumably the couple got along well enough, since three sons—Philip, Antipater, and Alexander—soon arrived. Cassander even named a city after Thessalonike, granting her great honor. But these ties of blood and bed were unable to prevent the queen from participating in a Macedonian version of
King Lear
.
When it comes to ruling a kingdom, three sons are two too many. After Cassander succumbed to dropsy in 297 BCE, Thessalonike used the teachings of her wily stepmother to manipulate Philip, Antipater, and Alexander to her advantage. But the queen was no Olympias—death soon visited them all.
Philip, the eldest son, wasted away from a mysterious illness not long after taking charge. Two years later, middle son, Antipater, became jealous of Thessalonike’s attentions to Alexander and murdered his mother in 295 BCE. Not one to be left out of a family squabble, Alexander bumped off Antipater but was then assassinated himself by a pretender to the throne.
Though Thessalonike’s mortal remains are long gone, she is remembered within the annals of Greek folklore. One legend claims that upon her death, the queen was transformed into a mermaid who lives still in the Aegean Sea.
CAUTIONARY MORAL
When it comes to succession,
one heir is plenty.
A BRIEF DIGRESSION
Stories about mermaids date from about 1000 BCE, some 700 years before Thessalonike. Even then, mermaids were associated with disappointing relationships. The first known mermaid legend tells of the ancient Assyrian goddess Atargatis, who drowned herself after a disastrous love affair. Though she hoped to be transformed into a fish, her divine nature would not cooperate—she retained her human form above the waist.
284 BCE
he deaths of Thessalonike and her family brought the annihilation of the descendants of Alexander the Great to a close. However, aftershocks from his legacy rocked the ancient world for some years. One victim they eventually claimed was Amastris, the queen of Heraclea Pontica, a Greek colony on the coast of what is now Turkey.
Amastris was the daughter of Oxyathres, the brother of the Persian king Darius III. Remember that mass wedding staged by Alexander to commemorate grabbing Persia from King Darius? Amastris was one of the reluctant war brides; she was married to Craterus, Alexander’s favorite bachelor general. As it turned out, Craterus was just the start of the princess’s complicated matrimonial career. She would have two more opportunities to register for royal china before breathing her last.
A BRIEF DIGRESSION
Modern dictionaries define a tyrant as a ruler who wields power through cruel or oppressive means. However, in ancient Greece a tyrant was someone who had seized the right to rule. While their reigns weren’t sanctioned by law or birthright, they usually won popular support from local businesses and workers—think corporate takeover rather than military coup. The truth was that the tyrant Dionysius was loved by his subjects—they even gave him the nickname of “the Good.”
One year later in 323 BCE, Amastris’s Alexander-inspired nuptials were history. When the big guy bit the dust, Craterus abandoned the princess to return to the sweetheart he’d left behind in Macedon. Before he departed, he gave his blessing to Amastris’s next groom, Dionysius, the tyrant ruler of Heraclea Pontica.
Rumor held that Dionysius was so overjoyed by the death of Alexander that he abandoned himself to endless luxury and gluttony. With Alexander gone, life at the tyrant’s court was a nonstop banquet, much of which was funded by Amastris, who had brought a considerable dowry. But too much of a good thing is too much: Dionysius grew morbidly obese. Nonetheless, his heft did not prevent him from gifting his consort with three children—Clearchus, Oxyathres, and a daughter named after herself—over a short period of time. Dionysius died by choking on his own fat in 306 BCE, leaving his queen to rule in trust for their sons.
Amastris resigned herself to single life. But like Penelope without Odysseus, it wasn’t long before suitors clamored for the empty place on her throne and in her bed. This time, the lucky winner was Lysimachus, the latest king of Macedon. Though he loved Amastris’s bountiful assets, he also loved the queen for herself. Nevertheless, Lysimachus went out for a pack of cigarettes permanently when the more politically advantageous queen of Egypt offered him her hand in marriage.
Now alone, Amastris hung up her veil for good—she chose to govern Heraclea Pontica on her own. According to the historian Memnon, the queen ruled prudently and built up the colony’s strength and size. In time, she expanded her territories to found the city of Amastris. When her children entered adulthood, Amastris prepared to hand over her well-tended crown and enjoy the quiet comforts of middle age. But this was not to be.