Dragonfly (13 page)

“What do you have to be sad about?”

“Nothing like losing my mom,”
Or my baby, or having a dad who doesn’t like me
. “But my best friend moved away this summer. That was hard.”

And whatever just happened with Jack, once the amazement wore off, I was sure I would fall apart.

He turned back to the fireplace, and I decided to swallow my fear and try to help my friend. “Lucy would like it if you talked to her more. She’s afraid of what’s going to happen after graduation. Maybe you could do something.”

“What?” His voice was stern again, and my heart sped up. But I kept talking.

“She didn’t tell me this, but I know you have big plans for Jack. You spend every Sunday with him. Do you ever do that with her?”

“Lucy doesn’t know a thing about golf. She’s only interested in clothes and spa treatments.”

“It’s not true. She says she’s not smart, but she makes good grades. Maybe you could take her out to dinner one night or take her to your office or just try and talk to her.”

“We don’t have anything to say to each other.”

I couldn’t believe he was listening to me, and when he looked at me, I could see a little of Jack in his expression. It gave me hope.

“Sometimes conversations just happen. Maybe if you tried—”

“Got it.” Jack was back.

Mr. Kyser broke eye contact with me. “I need to return a call,” he said and left the room.

Once he was gone, I leaned against the bar and exhaled. I hadn’t realized I was holding my breath.

“You okay?” Jack frowned. “What was that about?”

“Nothing,” I breathed. “He apologized for that night.”

“Good. He needed to apologize.”

I looked up at him, my ex- … whatever we were, and he led me out into the growing darkness. I put my hand through his arm, pulling myself closer to him. It was strange. I felt older, like I had turned a corner or learned something new.

He stopped me at the car and placed his fingers on my chin. “Anna Sanders, I’ll always remember you.”

My brows pulled together. “Are you serious?”

“I have to be.” He exhaled and pulled me into a hug. I closed my eyes, breathing in his warm scent. “But I’m glad we got to spend some time together. And I’ll be watching for your name in print.”

He released me, quickly backing away, and all I could do was frown, unable to answer him. After what just happened—the way he’d kissed me, the way he’d touched me—it all seemed so ridiculously formal. I knew he felt something more, and I couldn’t believe he would just walk away from us without even a small fight.

“I’ll be watching to see if I believe this,” was all I could say.

As I drove home, across the land bridge that separated Hammond from the rest of the island, back to my place in Fairview, I thought of what just happened and tried unsuccessfully to make it make sense.

Chapter 13

Mom was waiting for me when I got home, concern etched on her face.

“I heard there was an incident last night with Jack’s sister?” she said. “At the hospital? One of the association members was at the hospital and said the Kysers were there. Is that where you went?”

I decided against telling her the whole story. No use worrying her when it seemed to be under control now. “Lucy had an accident or something. She hit her head and Julian took her in.”

“Is she okay? Are you okay?”

“I’m fine, but I’m not sure about Lucy.” I sighed, dropping my bag on the counter. “She feels so helpless, and I can’t tell if her dad even cares other than to make her stop bothering him.”

“That’s a pretty harsh thing to say,” Mom said, but she only had part of the story.

“He also seems very interested in me not interfering with his plans for Jack.” And at this point, he was getting his wish—it was the only reason I could believe. Jack had to be pushing me away because of his dad.

“How in the world could you mess up his plans for Jack? Has he said something to you?”

“Not really.” I skipped telling her about the alcohol-birth control quiz. It would just make her mad.

“You know, honey, it’s possible Mr. Kyser could be afraid.”

“I find that hard to believe.”

“Well, think about it. He lost his wife. That can be difficult to get over. And now his daughter gets hurt and winds up at the hospital.”

I thought about his words—
Just like her mother.
“Maybe.”

“Sometimes adults act as poorly as children.”

I went to my room thinking of Mom’s words and consumed with everything that had happened in the last three days. After more than a week of nothing, everything happened at once. My college plans got a major boost with my cool new job at the paper, and my personal life exploded, starting with Julian’s kiss and ending with Jack saying it was over.

My face heated up when I thought of what I did in Jack’s bedroom—what we did. I squeezed my legs together and rolled onto my side, remembering how it felt, his fingers, his mouth. How would I ever be able to forget about him? I couldn’t. I didn’t want to.

Julian drifted into my mind. He was different, and I was different with him—not desperate. Calm and smart. But my insides didn’t work that way. They were torn and obsessed, and I still wanted Jack. He was a bad drug that left me craving more even when it hurt me. Maybe I was the idiot. I was the one swimming with sharks and didn’t know it. But how to stop? How did I climb out of the water when everything in me wanted to stay and keep swimming?

* * *

Lucy sent me a text early Saturday morning.
Jack convinced Dad we should still have the party. Julian said you didn’t get an invite. Here’s one—please come.

I stared at the words several minutes trying to process two things. Jack still wanted to have their party, and he still hadn’t invited me. It hurt, but I was going.

Julian sent me a follow-up text offering a ride within minutes of my receiving Lucy’s, and that’s how I found myself standing next to him, looking up at the Kyser house, which was lit up and glowing like a crystal palace in the black October night. I’d never seen it this way, and I felt like I was visiting for the first time.

My hair was blown out straight again, but in the white cotton sundress I’d chosen to wear and bronze sandals, I felt like a baby walking up to a house of sophisticates.

“You look great,” Julian said. “And Helen Freed better look out for me. I might get better at making her jewelry than she is.”

He was dressed in his standard black jeans with a grey blazer over a matching grey tee. With his shaggy, dark locks and rock-star swagger, Julian could pass anywhere—and he seemed at ease everywhere.

“I think everybody’d better look out for you.” I was still staring at the mansion. “You’re the next big thing.”

He threw an arm around my neck and kissed the top of my head. “That’s my angel.”

The small voice inside me said I should snap out of it. That what I needed was more Julian. But I shut it up. I shoved it far down and away in favor of my body’s demand for more Jack. I wanted more of his rich blend of excitement, sex, and intrigue. The life I’d been tossed out of. Maybe.

“What’s the plan?” Julian said, interrupting my thoughts. “Party up, then meet at the car around midnight?”

“That’s what I told Mom, so yeah. What do I do if you want to stay longer?”

“You can take the T-bird back, and I’ll catch a ride with Brad. Don’t wreck it.” I shook my head as he folded the keys into the sun visor.

As we approached the Kyser home, it seemed wider somehow, with tiny lights illuminating the balconies and guests laughing and spilling over onto the lawn. It was like something out of a movie, only I hadn’t been cast in it. Or given the screenplay.

I started to feel nervous about seeing Jack again. I didn’t want to seem like a stalker. But Lucy had invited me here. She and I were friends even if he wouldn’t give us a chance.

Then I had a worse thought. What if he didn’t want me here?

No. I had to believe my non-invite was just an oversight or him trying to protect me. He had to know I would’ve heard about a party at his house.

Julian sensed my hesitation and pulled my hand through the crook of his arm. But it didn’t ease my fear. We were at the door, and my chest was tight, my throat dry. I looked at him wide-eyed.

“Here we go,” he said ominously. “Into the lion’s den.”

Then he laughed and poked me gently in the side as he pushed open the door. It was a different entrance than I’d used before. Loud music greeted us as we passed through a waiting room the size of my bedroom. It was what some people called a mud room, and it had a bench where I supposed you sat to take off your muddy boots after a long day pheasant hunting or something. From where we stood, I could see inside the house was more decorated than outside. Everything was golden and crystal, and Julian lifted two slim flutes of champagne off a side table.

“No adults?” he whispered, handing me a flute and taking a sip from his. “Is this heaven?”

I glanced at him, and he winked before throwing back the rest of his drink. I followed suit and drained my glass. I might usually avoid alcohol, but tonight was a whole different ballgame.

We passed a bronze half-bath that glowed with golden light. The sink was a large, blown-glass flower, with a brazen stem forming the base. “Cool,” Julian pulled away to check it out, but I kept going.

The floors were the same smooth, beige stone apparently throughout the downstairs. Travertine. That’s what it was. I recognized it from one of my dad’s jobs. Very expensive. Of course.

I passed through the kitchen into the familiar dining and living area with its wall of floor-to-ceiling windows stretching across the north side facing the bay. Another stand of champagne flutes was against the wall, and I took one, quickly sipping to calm my nerves.

French doors opened onto the wrap-around patio made of the same flagstone as the driveway. More kids were spilling out that way, and far across the lawn, I saw Brad and Renee with Lucy. Her dress was a thigh-length, shiny yellow strapless chiffon, and she was radiant and laughing. If I didn’t know it, I would never have guessed she was at the hospital two days ago. No sign of her sadness tonight.

Slowly I continued through the house, searching, straining my eyes for him. It seemed like I heard his voice outside, so I made my way to the patio again. But he wasn’t there. I kept walking, remembering there was a private balcony around back. Just as I reached the corner, I saw him.

He was standing at the far end looking gorgeous as ever in tailored pants and a light blazer. The perfect host. His blonde hair moved slightly in the breeze, and his lips parted as he smiled. I couldn’t help remembering the last time he kissed me, his hands touching me. I wanted to be there, standing beside him, glowing as his date.

But that position had been filled.

My breath caught and instantly my eyes filled. I didn’t know her, but she could’ve been a model. She was as tall as Jack, with short, blonde hair and perfectly white teeth. She was dressed in a sparkly golden slip-dress that moved easily over her lean body. The knot in my throat grew tighter as I watched him say something in her ear, his lips grazing the side of her cheek. She smiled before kissing his mouth and dropping onto the loveseat he stood behind. Just as fast, he took a long drink of amber liquid from a crystal tumbler, and my heart broke as his hand slid down her cheek, past her neck, and into the front of her dress. She dropped her head back, and he bent forward and kissed her.

From far away, I heard the sound of shattering glass. The champagne flute I’d been holding had slipped from my fingers and fallen at my feet. Jack’s head lifted and our eyes met. Crystal crunched under my sandals as I backed away quickly, banging into a small table in my haste. I spun around to catch it, and when I looked up, two kids I didn’t know were staring at me.

Without a pause, I stood and flew out the back door, running toward the bay. I couldn’t see in the darkness. My eyes were still dazzled from the lights of the party and from Jack’s betrayal. My stomach throbbed so badly, I had to get away before the tears started. I knew they wouldn’t stop.

I had no idea what I slammed into that threw me to the ground. “Ow!” I cried out, throwing my hands forward as I slid onto all fours.

I only spent a moment on my face. Aching and bleeding, I rose and kept running toward the water, my eyes blurred with tears. I couldn’t stop them. Dry-heaves jerked me, until finally I made it to the bay. It felt like someone was jamming a knife into my side. I had a runner’s cramp, and I couldn’t catch my breath. I dropped onto the sand, gasping and crying. It hurt so bad. I was such an idiot. Such a stupid, stupid idiot, I sobbed.

I didn’t remember taking off my sandals, but I was barefoot, lying on my face, clutching the sand in front of me and trying with all my might not to fall apart completely. Not here. But my insides felt like they were being torn out and shredded by a careless butcher, and all I could do was moan as the tears poured from my eyes.

Who was that girl? Clearly, they were very comfortable together. Not even a flicker of hesitation when he felt her up, as if his hands had been there before. That was when I saw the truth. I’d hoped his dad was the reason, but now I knew why he didn’t invite me to the party. He didn’t want me there.