Drawn Deeper (20 page)

“And on that subject . . .” Mason stood and held his beer in the air, wobbling on his feet. “Are we good to toast to the loss of your blow job virginity, oldest brother?”

Justin stared at me, his mouth open in horror. “Your what?”

“Kim refused to blow him,” Austin said, sounding both appalled and amused.

“So you’ve never . . . ?”

“Has she popped your cherry or what?” Mason bellowed.

“I don’t kiss and tell,” I said, taking another puff of my cigar.

“I don’t give a fuck about the kissing,” Mason said. “My question is, do you get your dick sucked and tell?”

The others found that pretty damn funny, but once they were finished laughing, all eyes were on me.

“Come on, man,” Austin said. “Just a yes or a no. You’ll be thirty-eight soon. If Mason accidentally shoots me while we’re hunting tomorrow, I don’t want to die thinking you’ve never had your knob polished.”

“It wouldn’t be an accident, fucker,” Mason quipped.

I looked at him. “Mason, do you want to tell us about April’s blow jobs?”

“Fuck yeah. She’s incredible at them. When she wears those librarian glasses . . . I’m getting hard just thinking about it.”

“And how would she feel about you telling us that?”

He shrugged. “You’re my brothers. I’m sure she tells Ivy about my world-class pussy-eating skills.”

“We talk about it at dinner most nights,” Reed said, nodding.

“Meredith and I are taking things slow,” I said. “We kiss all the time, and last weekend I made it to first base.”

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Mason yelled. “Are you? Because that is the hugest, steamingest pile of bullshit I have ever—”

“Yes, I’m kidding, you dumbass. I’m not going into detail, but yeah, a toast wouldn’t be out of line.”

Mason threw his arms in the air, splashing beer onto the lodge’s wood plank floor.

“To the end of Kyle’s blow job virginity!” he yelled. “Hopefully, before he has gray hair on his nuts.”

We clinked bottles and drank. After a few seconds of silence, Reed met my eyes from the chair he sat in across from the couch.

“So things are good with you guys, then?”

“Things are amazing with us,” I said. “I’m happier than I’ve ever been.”

“Good. You guys both deserve that.”

“Just don’t get serious about her,” Justin said. “This is only the second woman you’ve ever been with, right? You need to add a few more notches to your belt before you settle down again.”

“I’m already serious about her. There’s no other woman out there who could compare to Meredith for me. And not only do we have amazing chemistry, she loves the boys and they love her back. Hell, they wanted to stay home with her instead of coming with us this weekend.”

“Mom asked me to try to talk some sense into you about her,” Reed said.

“Good luck with that,” I said sarcastically.

“I told her I think it’s great. I don’t know if I changed her views on things, but I tried.”

“I appreciate it. Mom and I are gonna end up throwing down over this.”

“Don’t do that,” Austin said.

I looked at Mason. “I want to bring Meredith to the wedding.”

He just looked at me for a second. “Okay? What, are you asking me or something?”

“Mom told me not to bring her.”

He nodded. “Because it’s at her house, so she feels like it’s her deal.”

“I guess. And I get it if you don’t want family tension at your wedding. I won’t ask her if you don’t want me to. But I won’t not ask her because Mom told me to. Or not to.” I shook my head. “Hell, I’m drunk.”

“It’s my wedding, and I say bring her. April will say the same thing.”

“Thanks. I want her to sit with the boys.” I took a long puff on my cigar and turned to Mason. “So when are you and April gonna start making babies?”

“Hopefully, soon.”

“Yeah? Good deal, man.”

“Hey,” Reed said. “Uh . . . I was planning to wait ’til tomorrow to tell you guys this, but I can’t . . . I’m too happy to wait. Ivy’s pregnant.”

A collective yell of excitement sounded. We all got up and crushed him in a group hug.

“Congratulations, man,” Mason said, grinning. “Damn, that is awesome.”

“Thanks. She’s two months along.”

“Noah must be thrilled,” I said, clapping Reed on the shoulder.

“We just told him the other day. He keeps asking Ivy how much longer ’til he’s a big brother.”

“He’ll only ask like five thousand more times before the baby’s born,” Austin said.

“Are you hoping for a boy or a girl?” Mason asked Reed.

“I really don’t care. Just healthy, that’s all we hope for.”

“This calls for another shot,” Mason said, tipping a bottle and filling the bottoms of the five glass tumblers on the table.

I groaned, foreseeing a serious hangover tomorrow, and picked up one of the glasses.

“To Reed’s fastest sperm!” Mason called out. “And to another little Lockhart.”

“Here, here,” I said, tipping back the drink.

I finished my cigar and got up from the couch, listening to a conversation between Reed and Austin.

“I was really glad to dodge that bullet,” Reed said. “I couldn’t have taken the case, anyway. The whole thing’s hit Ivy pretty hard and she’s actually spent some time with Madison, so I’m conflicted out.”

They were talking about Patrick Rhodes, the man charged with sexually assaulting Madison Golden. Reed was a part-time public defender, but the main public defender had been assigned to Rhodes’s case.

“That guy’s a fucking monster,” I said.

“How’s Madison doing?” Austin asked me.

“I don’t know anything firsthand.”

“Did you treat her the night it happened?” Justin asked.

I nodded. “I think everyone’s heard I was there that night, but I can’t go into detail. It was a hard one for me. Really hard. I treated Rhodes, too.”

“No fucking way,” Mason said.

“I had to.”

“No, I know. I understand. I just can’t imagine.”

I looked at Reed. “I’m glad you didn’t get his case.”

“I’ve got a whole new perspective as a parent,” he said. “I don’t know what I’d do if someone hurt Noah that way. I’d be fit to commit murder.”

“Me too. I hope that bastard gets ripped apart in prison.” I yawned and glanced at the clock. “Well, on that somber note, I’m going to bed.”

“What? It’s only midnight,” Mason said. “And where my strippers at?”

“I’m too old for that shit. I’m going to call Meredith before she goes to sleep.”

“Awww,” Justin cried dramatically. “Kyle’s gonna go check in.”

“Fuck you, man. I’ll see you ladies back out here at four thirty.”

“At what time?” Mason cried.

“We’re meeting Dad at six.”

“I’m going to bed,” Mason said.

Everyone else followed, and the lodge was quiet when I got into the king-size bed in my room. When I took out my phone to call Meredith, there was a photo and a text from her, sent two hours ago.

Meredith: So sleepy. We swam for four hours and went out for dinner w/my dad. I’m in Eric’s bed bc he fell asleep reading me Harry Potter. Hope you’re having fun. xoxo

The photo was of the boys jumping into the pool, both midair with their arms and legs out, smiling. It made me smile, too.

A year ago, I’d wondered if my sons would ever be carefree again. They’d been devastated by Kim leaving, because even though she was an out-of-control alcoholic, she was their
mother
. Kids at school had teased them about their mom not loving them. There had been nights when they’d slept in my bed, one or both of them crying but trying not to show it.

We’d gotten through that time together, and I’d never even considered finding a woman who would end up being what all three of us needed.

Meredith was more than what we needed, though. She was what we deserved.

Meredith

I’d made blueberry pancakes for breakfast Sunday morning, and Eric gave me a sly, blue-tinged smile across the kitchen table.

“My dad likes you,” he said.

“I like him, too.”

His big brown eyes turned serious. “He’s gonna kiss you.”

My heart melted. I was so crazy about Kyle’s sons. “Okay. Thanks for telling me. I’ll definitely be ready.”

Jordan came padding into the kitchen, only looking half awake.

“Want some pancakes and sausage?” I asked him.

He nodded and sat down at the table.

“What should we do today, guys?” I piled food onto Jordan’s plate and looked between them. “We can go somewhere if you want.”

“Like where?” Eric said through a bite of pancake.

We talked through the options and decided to go to the movies this afternoon. After they finished their food, they both got in Kyle’s bed to watch Sunday morning cartoons.

I was at the sink rinsing dishes when the sound of the garage door that led into the kitchen opening made me turn around.

Grace Lockhart was standing there sizing me up, a casserole dish in her hands. I immediately felt a sick, churning sensation in my stomach.

“I assumed Stephanie was watching the kids this weekend,” she said, her tone tinged with annoyance. “So I brought breakfast over.”

I switched the faucet off and dried my hands on the towel by the sink. “Thank you,” I said. “For bringing that, I mean.”

“Where are the boys?”

“Watching cartoons in the bedroom.”

She nodded. “The bedroom. And I’m sure you’re about to go climb right in between them.”

The hostility in her tone made my cheeks heat. She’d blindsided me here, in Kyle’s house. This place held nothing but happy memories for me. It was a safe spot, where I knew I wouldn’t be judged.

Until now. I met her steely gaze across the room.

“Is there anything else you need, Grace?”

In other words,
leave
. She didn’t need to be standing in front of me to cast judgment—she did it from afar already.

“This is
my son’s
home.”

“I’m aware.”

“And I am welcome here anytime.” She set her dish down on the table and walked over to me.

I wanted to run, like I always did. To retreat from her disdainful glare and the hurtful comments she surely had banked up for me.

But this time, there was no place to go. I squeezed the dish towel in my hands and stood tall.

“I see through you, Meredith,” she said in a low tone. “I always have.”

“You see what you want to see. The truth doesn’t matter to you.”

She narrowed her eyes. “What I see is a woman going on thirty who latched on to a divorced doctor’s children to ingratiate herself to him. If you knew what those two boys have been through—”

“I do know. And that’s not what happened.”

“Kyle is lonely and lost. And for you to think of him as some sort of meal ticket is disgraceful, even for you.”

I scoffed. “Even for me? The worst person in the world, just because I decided not to marry Reed, right?”

“You calculated that whole thing to humiliate our family.”

Nearly a decade’s worth of anger and resentment finally boiled over.

“You know what, Grace? Kyle wasn’t the least bit lost when we started seeing each other. He was just a single dad with a lot on his shoulders, but he carried every ounce of his responsibilities so well I was in awe of him. I still am, every day. And I don’t need a meal ticket. I’ve got my own career and my own home.”

She shook her head. “What you don’t have, though, is a family of your own. So you figured you’d just slide into this well-off one. I know how opportunists work. You may not even consciously realize you’re doing it.”

“The saddest part of this whole thing,” I said, smiling ruefully, “is that you don’t realize how incredible Kyle is. You think I see dollar signs, but I see the best man I’ve ever known.”

“Don’t you dare accuse me of undervaluing my son. I know exactly who he is, and he’s way too good for you.”

“Maybe,” I admitted. “But that’s for him to decide.”

“You know exactly what you’re doing. Preying on his weak spots and—”

“I am not
preying
on anyone.” My tone was so low it was almost a whisper. “Shame on you for being such a spiteful, bitter person. I’m not perfect. I own that. I made a mistake, and I’ve apologized to Reed for it. I’m not carrying around guilt or shame over it anymore.”

“We’re a close-knit family, Meredith. You know that. And if Kyle is forced to choose, don’t think for one second he’ll choose you. This time, it may be
you
left holding the bag.”

“Just go.” I was emotionally wrung out and overwhelmed. “Take this up with—”

“Grandma!” Eric called from the living room.

Grace and I locked eyes, a moment of understanding passing between us.

“Good morning, grandson,” she said warmly, opening her arms to him for a hug.

“This is Meredith, the lady Dad wants to kiss,” he said, grinning up at her.

The look on her face was priceless, but it quickly morphed into a phony look of kindness.

“We’ve met, yes.” She smoothed a hand over his hair. “Would you like some bacon, egg, and cheese casserole? The one I make on Saturday mornings sometimes?”

“No, thanks. Meredith made pancakes.”

Another silent point scored for me. I arched a brow at Grace.