Dreaming With A Broken Heart (Hollywood Legends Book 1) (16 page)

“And now?” Jade asked, fascinated. Everything
Garrett did while becoming the man he was, seemed thrilling. An adventure.
Compared to her formative years, it was.

“I let them all lapse. I wanted to give the orders, not
take them.”

“You answer to no one but yourself.”

Jade said the words, savoring their meaning. To be in
control of her life. To make her own decisions. That was her goal. It was so
close to being a reality, she could practically taste it.

“When I’m on the set, my word is law.” Garrett
chuckled ruefully. “The rest of the time, Wyatt thinks he’s in charge. I
suppose as producer, he is.”

“Does that bother you? Answering to your older
brother?”

“Better him than someone else.”

She watched Garrett slide down the bed, relaxed. Naked. Jade
sighed. Modern technology was wonderful. However, it would never replace having
a big, solid, gorgeous man within touching distance.

“Do you always work with Wyatt?”

“I’ve been lucky. Wyatt and my father have produced all
but one of my pictures. These days Dad doesn’t have much to do with the big
budget movies. He prefers what he calls his
vanity projects
. Last year,
he co-produced
Wishes
with Sam Laughton.”

“I loved that movie.” Jade’s eyes sparkled with
enthusiasm. “The book is one of my all-time favorites. Some
vanity
project
. How many Oscars did it win?”

“Seven. Including best picture. That was Dad’s third
Academy Award.”

“Mmm. I have every song from the soundtrack on my phone,
iPod, and computer. All I need to hear are first few notes of
Unconditional
to make me a weepy mess.”

“I know the composer.”

“You know Rose O’Brian? I was thrilled when she won the
Oscar for best song. And best score.”

“Finally,” Garrett laughed. “The lady is
impressive. Rose and her husband, Jack Winston are old friends.”

It was the perfect opening for Garrett to tell Jade about
the investigation he had set in motion. He knew she should know. He
planned
to tell her. Just not tonight. Why put something in her head she couldn’t
control? When Jack called with some news,
that
would be soon enough for
her to know.

“I loved
Grind
.”

Jade listened to the down and dirty song so many times; she
sometimes thought the images evoked by the lyrics were tattooed on her brain.
Rose O’Brian vividly brought a fantasy world to life with raunchy lyrics set to
a pulse-pounding beat. Jade often wondered if anyone really did those things.
There was one in particular.

“Tell me your favorite part of the song,” Garrett
said. His smile held a naughty promise. “Then when I’m back in Los
Angeles—”

“Second verse, third line.”

Jade groaned silently. She should have taken the time to
think about her answer. Instead, she came across as a sex-starved fan girl. She
waited for him to tease her. Or worse, laugh at her. She should have known
better. He wasn’t anyone else. This was Garrett.

Garrett put his free hand behind his head, closing his eyes.
“Play it for me.”

He didn’t speak until the song was over — the final note
faded.

“It’s been awhile. I’d forgotten how that plea the
singer makes to her lover cuts through all the crap. She doesn’t want it sweet.
The hell with foreplay. All she wants is a hot fuck.”

Garrett shifted, rolling his shoulders. When his eyes
opened, Jade sucked in a deep breath. The color was the palest smoke. Silvery.
Electric. He drew Jade in without a word. The way he looked at her mouth go
dry.

“I want a hot fuck.”

“I think my corruption of you is almost complete,”
Garrett declared.

His obvious enjoyment, when she used the unfamiliar word,
made Jade feel exactly like a student praised by a respected teacher.

“What else is there?”

“Jade, honey, we haven’t scratched the surface.”
Garrett looked at her, the teasing gone from his voice. “We can go so much
deeper. Time is our friend. Soon, there won’t be anything that is taboo. All
you have to do is ask.”

It was a two-way street, Jade realized. She couldn’t imagine
denying him — no matter what he wanted. That was when it hit her. There was
something he wasn’t going to ask. Something too personal. Too intimate. She
knew in that instant it was what she had to do. For him. For herself.

“Watch.”

Steadying her shaking hand, Jade took a deep breath. She
knew if Garrett were in the room, she wouldn’t have the nerve to do this. No
matter how much she trusted him, the fear of rejection kept their lovemaking in
the dark. It kept
her
in the dark. The only way to move out of the
shadows was to show Garrett everything. Whatever his reaction. It was time to
start living in the light.

Leaning over, Jade flipped the switch on the wall. She
squinted against the sudden brightness. If she was going to do this, she was
going all the way. Pointing the phone toward her stomach, she grabbed the end
of the sheet. This wasn’t going to be a slow reveal. She wasn’t trying to be
provocative. She treated it like she would a Band-Aid. She didn’t ease the
sheet off. No. With one more deep breath, Jade closed her eyes, ripping the
cloth from her body.

Jade waited. She didn’t look at her scars. There was no need.
They were something she lived with every day of her life. An ugly reminder when
all she wanted to do was forget.

The larger scars were still puckered, their color an angry
red. The crisscross of the others showed the man wielding the knife didn’t care
what it looked like. His purpose had been to inflict as much pain and damage as
possible. In that, he succeeded.

Luck kept her alive. For which Jade was eternally grateful.
The scars would fade. The plastic surgeon at the hospital seemed to think he
could practically erase them. If she waited a few more months, Garrett would
never have to see the marks that marred her once perfect skin. So why not wait?
Because she wanted him to understand. If the scars were to disappear tomorrow,
she would always carry them around. They ran deep. To some extent, they always
would.

“I’m going to hunt that fucker down and skin him
alive.”

Jade blinked. That was not the response she expected. It
surprised her. Almost as much as her response to his words. Skin Stephen alive?
Hell, yes! Then, as quickly as she thought it, she knew it wasn’t what she
wanted.

“What good would that do? He would be dead and you
would be in prison. I don’t like the sound of that.”

“I suppose you’re right,” Garrett conceded with a
sigh. “I’ll settle for a slow castration.”

“Jesus. Have you always been this bloodthirsty?”
Jade asked. She didn’t add that the castration part sounded damn good to her.
She didn’t want to encourage anything that might get him in trouble. Stephen
wasn’t worth it.

“That bastard seems to bring it out of me.”

When the seconds ticked by without another word from
Garrett, Jade started to turn the phone away.

“Wait,” he said, stopping her. “Do something
for me?”

“What?” Jade couldn’t imagine what he would ask.

“Hold the phone steady.”

“Okay.”

“Now, put your free hand in front of the camera.”

Puzzled, Jade did what he asked.

“If I were there, I would trace every line with kisses.
I would show you how much I want you. All of you. However, I can’t do that. Not
yet. So I want you to do it for me. Put your finger on one of the scars.”

Glad he couldn’t see the tears welling up in her eyes, Jade
followed Garrett’s instructions.

“Do you feel the touch?”

“Yes,” Jade whispered.

“Close your eyes. Imagine it’s me. Can you do that for
me, Jade?”

“Yes.”

In her mind, Jade felt Garrett’s gentle caress. And the
tears fell.

“Soon, Jade. No more crappy motel. No more
hiding.”

Could it be that easy
, Jade wondered. Could they step
into the light together? Tonight, she believed anything was possible.

JADE SPENT THE morning with a spring in her step. Instead of
trying to remember the last time that happened, she let herself enjoy it.

Nothing around her had changed since yesterday. The staff
watched her every move. Someone was always dusting, vacuuming, or rearranging
in her vicinity. Jade wasn’t certain what they were supposed to do if she had a
nervous breakdown. Calling for outside help had to be number one on the
Absolutely
Not
list. If at all possible, handle it internally.

The image of two men, straightjacket handy, sequestered in a
secret room, popped into Jade’s mind. What a boring job that would be. And
pointless. Jade’s sanity was firmly in place. If the men existed, she hoped
they were served lunch.

Smiling at her silly thoughts, Jade felt a sudden chill race
down her spine. The phantom asylum attendants might not be real. However the
threat was. Her father knew people. Getting her committed for
observation
wouldn’t be difficult. A few greased palms, a little quid pro quo. Before she
knew it, Jade could find herself locked away in a rubber room all her own.

Jade shook off the somber thoughts. The first thing she
needed to do was make sure she would be missed. Not that long ago, her
disappearance wouldn’t have caused a flutter. She could almost hear the
conversation

Jade’s gone?
How long?

A year
.

That long? Well, what do you know?

It wouldn’t be as easy now. Jade had
people
. Regular
friends raised questions when someone they cared about went missing. Important,
influential friends insisted on answers. The Landis family carried weight, not
only in Los Angeles. They were known all over the world. Jade knew half of them
were in her corner. No questions asked. If Garrett’s brothers jumped in, there
would be an ear-splitting din no one could ignore.

Feeling bouncy again, Jade glided down the front stairs to
the foyer as she did every morning. The outside looked the same. Calm.
Collected. So different from the woman she showed to Garrett last night. They
didn’t say goodbye until dawn. They talked about everything and nothing. From
the important to the silly. In between, they guided each other through two more
orgasms. Phone sex could never replace the real thing. Still, in a pinch, with
the right man, Jade would take it.

She wanted breakfast. Pancakes sounded good. Jade laughed.
That ought to raise a few eyebrows. She never ate this early. And certainly
nothing that heavy. It was bound to get back to her father. Turning toward the
kitchen, she shrugged off the thought. Let them scurry around like the rats
they were, reporting how Miss Marlow not only had pancakes, she used butter and
maple syrup. Shocking! Once she was gone, they could spend their days searching
for someone else to gossip about.

“Miss Marlow.”

With a sigh, Jade turned. Great. Mandy. One of her father’s
two assistants. The snarky one. She enjoyed treating Jade as if she was a few
clowns short of a circus.

The trick was to let Mandy think she had the upper hand.
Jade didn’t care if she knew the truth.

“Let me guess. My father wants to see me.”

“Immediately,” Mandy huffed.

The woman was pretty. Blonde. A little plump. A clone of
every other assistant Jade could remember. This one seemed a tad cockier than
the rest. Perhaps she was expecting to get up off her knees in the office and
move to the bedroom.
After
the honeymoon.

Fool
. This peroxide cutie was no closer to that gold
ring than any of the others. Anson Marlow would never remarry. Jade was certain
of that. There was a good reason he had never divorced her mother. She was the
magic get out of relationship free card her father pulled out when one of his
woman hinted for him to
put a ring on it
.

Mandy, like all that came before her, had a short shelf
life. Six months, maybe a year. If they didn’t raise a fuss on their way out,
there would be a tidy bonus in their bank account. If he really liked them, he
passed them on to one of his business associates. Very last century. Early last
century. Think
Mad Men
meets
Best Little Whore House in Texas
.

Normally, Jade tried not to think of other women in
derogatory terms. In this case, that was difficult. None of them were forced.
They had a choice. Move on to the next boss, or walk away. Most of them picked
curtain number one.

Not waiting for Mandy, Jade headed to her father’s office.
Better to get whatever it was out of the way.

“You are supposed to knock,” Mandy called to Jade.
The other woman’s much shorter legs chugged as fast as they could considering
the four-inch pumps on her feet. Another of her father’s demands.

Ignoring her, as she always did, Jade turned the doorknob.

“I won’t need you this morning, Mandy. There is a list
of errands on the table by the front door. Lincoln will drive you.”

“Of course, Anson. Call me if you need
anything
.”

Anything
, Jade wondered.
Dictation? Foot massage?
Blowjob
?

“Jade.
Jade
!” Anson barked. “I would
ask where your mind is these days, but I already know the answer.”

Deciding this was going to be one of those conversations —
one sided — Jade took a seat.

“I don’t know what you mean, Father. I haven’t let my
duties slide. Is there a problem I’m unaware of?”

“I was willing to turn a blind eye,” her father
continued. “Let you get it out of your system.” He pulled an envelope
from the top drawer of his desk. “After yesterday, I’ve decided it is time
to put an end to it.”

“First, yesterday was about me taking some time to
myself. What is wrong with that? Second, I have no idea what you are talking
about. Put an end to what?”

Anson tapped the envelope with one finger.

“Did you think you could sneak out of the house without
anyone noticing?”

Jade stiffened.

“From the expression on your face, I’d say the answer
is yes.”

Whatever her father knew, it didn’t matter. Jade wasn’t
going to let him bully her. Not this time. Never again.

“It shouldn’t be necessary for me to
sneak out
,”
Jade pointed out. “What does that say about my status in this household?
Am I your daughter? Your servant? A virtual prisoner? Tell me, Father. How do
you see me?”

“This is exactly what I was talking about.” Anson’s
eyes narrowed. A sure sign he was annoyed. “Why are you questioning me?
This is my house. My word is law. When you start forgetting that, it is time to
pull in the reins.”

“Now I’m a what? A farm animal?”

“Don’t be impertinent, Jade.” He slid the envelope
in front of her. “This is over. Understand? Right now.”

Pictures. Before she opened the flap, Jade knew what she
would find. Her father had her followed. All these months, thinking she had a
beautiful secret all her own. She waited for the feelings of disappointment,
embarrassment. Then she waited some more. When it didn’t happen, Jade realized
it didn’t matter that her father knew. Knew the entire time. He didn’t say
anything until now. At the time, she did have a secret because she believed it
to be true. Now, when it no longer mattered, there was no way for him to spoil
it. The memories were hers and her father couldn’t do anything about it.

With a steady hand, Jade tipped the envelope, letting the
pictures slide out. Garrett. Arriving at the motel. Leaving the office. Going
into the room. Nothing incriminating.

“These are pictures of a man in glasses and a baseball
cap. So?”

“Keep looking.”

She was the subject of half a dozen shots. Unlike Garrett,
she was easily recognized. Again, nothing to get excited about. She exited a
cab then entered a room. The same room as Garrett. That was the last photo.
None of them together. She knew the curtains were always tightly drawn. They
never turned on a light. These pictures proved nothing.

“When I think about my daughter meeting a man in that
part of town. In a seedy motel? What were you thinking?”

Jade returned the pictures to the envelope, and then set
them on the desk.

“I have nothing to say, Father.”

Jade settled back in her chair. She wasn’t pretending not to
care what her father thought. She didn’t.

“Is that so?” Anson shook his head in amazement.
“The furor over the last scandal is finally dying down. Do you want a new
one to remind everyone? It won’t just be this sordid affair that gets talked
about. Everything else will come with it.”

“No one knows,” Jade countered. When her father
simply gave her a steady, unblinking look, she finally understood what this was
about. “No one except you.”

“I wouldn’t want to leak this to the press, Jade.
Unless you give me no alternative. Stop seeing this Hamish Floyd. When it’s
time for you to date again, find someone better than a lowly assistant
director. He’s an immigrant. A nobody.”

Hamish Floyd
? Not Garrett? Jade tried to take in what
was happening. First, the blatant blackmail. Then finding out her father’s PI
misidentified the man in the pictures. It was a lot to take in.

“How did you find out who he was?”

“The license plate on that beat up car he drives.”

Anson shook his head as though the make of the automobile somehow
made all this worse.

“I see,” Jade sighed.

Jade
did
see. She hated this. However, her father
reminded her of something she let herself forget. Her life was a mess. Between
an on-the-run abusive husband and a father who needed to control her, there was
no room for a man. Especially a man like Garrett. His family was almost
scandal-free. That was saying something in this town. Once his name became
linked with hers, he would be forever tainted. She deluded herself if she
thought they could go public. Trying for a normal relationship was hard enough.
Add to it her baggage and his name? They were doomed before they started.

Her father was going to win. As usual. It was up to her to
make sure he never knew the real reason why.

“Very well, Father. I won’t see him again.” Jade
started to get up. Thinking again, she sat back down. “Do you ever get
tired of it?”

“I beg your pardon,” he asked vaguely. Having
dealt with the matter, Anson Marlow had moved on. Jade had resumed her place of
low-level importance.

“Aren’t you sick of breaking me down every time I show
a hint of a backbone?” Jade asked. This was something she had wondered
about for a long time. She needed the answer. “Why bother? Why do you
care, Father?”

For a moment, she thought he was going to ignore the
question. When he finally spoke, Jade wondered why he bothered. One more lie.

“You are a Marlow. There is a standard to uphold.”
Anson shrugged. “Though it shouldn’t be necessary, occasionally you need
reminding.”

“Bullshit.”

“What did you say?”

“Bull. Shit. The stuff that comes out of the back end
of a male bovine. You, Father, are full of it.”

Jade enjoyed the shock that flitted over her father’s face.
The red, angry flush that followed she liked even better.

“That kind of language is not permitted in this house,
young lady.”

“Is that the best you’ve got? No more threats?”
Jade shook her head in amazement. “This isn’t about your good name. It’s
about control. You don’t love me. You certainly don’t like me. What good am I
to you? I’ll tell you,” she continued before he could respond. “I may
be an annoyance, but I’m
your
annoyance. Your flesh and blood. DNA
doesn’t lie.”

“What are you talking about?”

“You had our DNA tested,” Jade informed calmly.
“Why wouldn’t you? Your wife ran off. God forbid she saddle you with
another man’s child. You had to be sure. Tell me, Father, were you relieved or
disappointed when you found out I’m yours?”

“How do you know about that?”

The test results were in the office safe along with his
other secrets. Why he kept the results, Jade didn’t know or care. When she
realized what they were, a big part of her hoped she
wasn’t
his
daughter. No such luck.

“Does it matter?” Did anything between them matter
anymore?

“This is getting us nowhere,” Anson said
dismissively. “Remember, Jade. Your actions reflect back on me. Drop your
playmate. This is my house. You follow my rules.”

“Understood.” Jade stood to leave. She was at the
door when her father left her with one more dictate.

“Clean up the language. I never want to hear you swear
again.”

“Believe me,” Jade said. “It won’t be a
problem.”

Without a backward glance, Jade closed the door. She walked
back the way she came. Up the stairs. To her room. When she was alone, she took
out her phone. Before her resolve started to crack, she found Garrett’s number.
Jade wouldn’t let herself hesitate. She hit delete. It was a little thing.
Symbolic. She had the numbers memorized. However, this way she would have to
think before calling him. If she had to do more than push one keypad, she could
talk herself out of it.

When she left her room that morning, she thought she had a
future with Garrett. Now, she knew it could never be. Was a little taste of
happiness better than none at all? What was the saying? You couldn’t miss what
you never had. Had Garrett been hers? She wanted to think so. She wanted the
memories. She would never wish away the time they had together. Remembering
would hurt. Still, it was better than not feeling anything.

Once that was taken care of, Jade’s next action was one that
was long overdue. Taking one suitcase from her closet, she packed the few
things she owned that held any value. From her jewelry box, she took her
maternal grandmother’s pearls. Earrings that belonged to her mother. She left
the rest. Tucked underneath the velvet lining, she retrieved her most precious
possession. A picture of her mother. As far as she knew, it was the only one
that survived. Her father shredded the rest. This one was given to Jade by the
lawyer who handled the transfer of the money her mother had left her. It was
hers if she wanted it. Those were the only instructions she gave.