Dreams of the Forgotten (19 page)

Without words, he washed my body. Languidly, the suds spiraled down the drain. My head and heart ached. I continued to remember things that had happened to Seth. My mind overflowed with faces, places, names, and sounds. I could hear the sound the ocean made as it crashed against the cliffs below the village. I remembered Nikita had promised oysters for dinner. I loved oysters. He would trade a part of today's catch for them and we were going to celebrate with a small feast and I couldn't wait.

"We need to hurry up, Angelo. Nikita will be home soon and I'm hungry."
The hands in my hair paused and I opened my eyes to the disorienting view of the bathroom tiles. I shut them against a wave of vertigo, putting a steadying hand on the wall. My mind ran over what I'd said and I wanted to fall through the floor.
After a slight hesitation, Ushna continued to rinse my hair. I'd not only spoken Greek, a language I'd never learned, and I'd called Ushna by another's name. I didn't want to guess at what he thought. Today was hard enough for the both of us without this disorientation.
I jumped when the water turned off. He opened the shower door and cool air rushed in, pimpling my skin with goose flesh. I wanted a do-over. Hindsight is twenty-twenty and all that. I'd have shot Daniel as soon as he got out of the car. My pups would've stayed safe and we wouldn't have to worry about the bastard coming back. I wouldn't have needed a nap, which meant no dreams, no pissy brother, and I wouldn't have called Ushna Angelo. Easypeasy.
Now if I only believed it could be that simple.
Ushna reached in and snagged my elbow, pulling me out of the shower. Tenderly, he dried me off with a big fluffy towel. He didn't once look at me and I wished…
"I'm sorry."
He gazed at me with soft eyes, not hard or accusing. He brushed his lips briefly against mine and he caught my sigh.
"Come on, let's get you in bed."
"I'd rather talk to you."
Ushna threw the towel over my head and rubbed vigorously. Great stall tactic but it could only last so long. Snatching the cloth from my head, he grabbed my hand and pulled me toward the bed.
"Please, Ushna."
I wanted to get this over with now and not walk on eggshells the next couple of days. I needed him to tell me everything would be okay, that
we
were okay. I wanted him to hold me and touch me like today never happened.
He sat on the edge of the bed and seemed to deflate. He bent forward, rested his elbows on his knees, and stared at the floor. I didn't know what to do or what he needed from me. Gods, I wished he'd say what, so I could do it, give it, or be it.
I walked to the dresser and pulled out the support belt for my stomach and then put my sleep pants on. I gazed at him, looking for some sign, something to tell me how to proceed.
"Tell me about Angelo and Nikita."
I licked my lips. That wasn't what I'd expected him to say. I walked over to the chair and gratefully sank down into its soft cushions.
"They were my friends. We did everything together. They were brilliant as a couple, full of life and so in love. They were like magnets, gravitating around each other. When one moved so did the other.
"Nikita was the brash one. Always goading, daring us to do strange and crazy things. He was full of fire, strong and passionate. And deadly.
"I remember we were barely into our twenties. You'd taken the boat to the island to speak to your father and on the way back, you were chased by brigands, thieves. We'd been waiting for you on the shore and he… I don't know how to explain it, it was like he erupted. He loaded his sling and when you were fifteen or twenty feet from the shore, he'd slung four or five rocks within seconds.
"When we swam out and climbed aboard…there were seven of them. I killed two. Nikita was so… feral until he reached you and it was like someone had dampened the fire and he was calm again."
I glanced at Ushna and knew I had somehow said too much. I winced at his expression.
"Do you know…?" Ushna pulled in a deep breath, "Do you know how I wish I remembered too. It's killing me that I can't share this with you. It's like we've had this whole other life, and I know I should remember, but I don't. Some things you say seem familiar but there is nothing there to connect me to it. You called me Angelo and it felt right and wrong all at the same time." Ushna raked a hand through his dark hair.
"And with Brian—Nikita, you have these memories of him, of a life with him, and I… want to be a part of that so badly. To know how he grew up. What kind of man he became. How his voice sounded, his laughter. You get to remember his touch, his kiss, and I want to be a part of that. I want to remember too. I want to know if I made him happy. I want…" He regarded me with tear-filled eyes. "I miss him. Every fucking day of my life, I miss him."
My heart faltered and my breath hitched before I composed myself.
"No." Ushna came off the bed and knelt before me. "No, listen to me. It's not you. I need you like I need water. The way I feel about the two of you, how I need you. It would've never been either–or. If Brian had lived, we both would've pursued you. Don't you see you're essential to me? Maybe you've always been, if your memories are any indication. You belong with me and that means you belonged with Brian as well. Please… don't doubt my love."
I nodded my head, pressing his hand to my cheek, not sure I would keep it together if I tried to answer him at that moment.
"Come on, I can sense how tired you are." Ushna helped me up from the chair and over to the bed.
The muscles moved and stretched along his back as he turned down the covers. I couldn't stop from asking, "You're not jealous?"
He chuckled, backing me onto the bed. "Jealous of myself?" His eyes twinkled with true mirth. "Not a chance."
Carefully, I lay down on my side. Ushna moved the pillows around, propping and tucking before sliding in behind me. His sure hands caressed my stomach and he kissed the back of my neck, lulling me to sleep.
In my dreams, I searched for and called Nikita's name only to hear the echo of my own voice bounced back to me.

The house was bustling with activity when I woke. Everyone prepared for our trip to Georgia. Tomorrow we'd drive to Bahbelle. There was no way I could fly from Oklahoma City to Atlanta. There were too many people and too many hazards that could break the illusion of the ring and reveal my secret.

So driving it was. But that wasn't going to be a picnic either. I was unable to sit for long periods of time because my hips and back hurt too much. What should've been a seventeen hour drive would take two days with the frequent stops.

Losing so much time to the drive meant we wouldn't linger in Bahbelle. We'd wrap up our business and immediately come home. The pups would be born not too long afterward. Then, finally I could rest for a little while.

The birthing seam had darkened to a deep ruddy pink. It felt odd against my fingertips. It was rigid, close to the coarseness of hard scar tissue. The twins were more active. They rolled and kicked, playing soccer with my kidneys. They always seemed to settle down when Ushna was around. This morning was no different. I woke up with grief clenching my heart and one of the pups playing the drums on my bellybutton.

"You okay?" Ushna slipped a hand over the extra bulge, rubbing in circles until the child stopped.
"Yeah, that was the
I'm hungry
wake up call."
Chuckling, he helped me out of the bed. At the dresser, I stared at the soft woolen pants and tunic. It was a deep red with gold thread scrollwork. In our society, red was the color of mourning, a culture trait that tied the Lycans to their Sumerian origins.
I fingered the material. The sorrow from last night was tempered but not gone. I'd expected Nikita to be lying in bed with us when I woke. Disappointment followed by grief chased away the fog of sleep. Even though I smiled for Ushna, my heart was cracked.
He reached around me into the drawer and pulled out the clothing. "Here, let me help you." He regarded me with quiet understanding and I let him dress me in the pants and shirt.
"I was thinking…" He flashed me a quick smile. "I barely slept because I wondered…" His gaze flicked up to mine and then back down to where he buttoned the shirt. Was he nervous?
"Ushna?"
He licked his lips; his fingers caressed the last button. He pulled in a deep breath, straightened his spine, and threw his shoulders back. I was confused and a little worried as he took my face between his palms.
"Tristan, I've been thinking about what you said last night. How Nikita and Angelo wanted to bind Seth to them. We're the same, us and them. I'd be a liar if I denied that I want to tie you to me. I want to wrap you around me in every possible way. I don't think I'd survive if something were to happen to you."
"I made you the promise. You felt the magic link me to the vow I made to you. You wear my ring." I reached up and fingered the lead ring that had been formed when I healed Ushna after he was shot by Caspian MacCuill. "I'm not going anywhere."
Ushna's hands tightened on my face. "I want more, I want everything from you. I want to bind you to me by bite and blood. I want to make the exchange with you. And I know that you've been burned and you may not be in the same place right now. Things have been crazy the last several months and the children will be born soon. But down the road, maybe you'd consider…"
"Okay," I croaked, interrupting Ushna. My mouth was dry. I'd fought my predator since the first time Ushna and I'd made love. I'd been so worried, but the dreams of Nikita and Angelo had taught me some things about life and love. I wouldn't make the same mistake as Seth did and wait until it was too late.
"Okay?" Ushna stilled looking at me with shock. The pulse at this throat quickened as he waited for confirmation that he'd heard me correctly.
My gaze roamed over the face I loved above all. "Yeah," I whispered.
The beauty of his smile was arresting. "Yes!"
"Yes."
"Oh Gods, he said yes." Ushna whooped. He vibrated with excitement. "You said yes!"
I reached up, fisted his hair, and pulled him down for a bruising kiss. He clutched at me, bringing me as close as he could. His hands were roaming, grasping, there wasn't any part of me that went untouched.
A knock came at the door and Samuel stuck his head in. "Everything okay? I heard a yell."
Ushna pulled away, pulsating with excitement. "He said yes!"
Samuel glanced from me to Ushna. "That's great?"
"He said yes!" Ushna whooped again. "He said yes!" Ushna picked up Samuel and swung him around in a circle before setting him back down.
"He said yes?" Samuel repeated, not understanding, but Ushna's exuberance was catching.
Ushna punched Samuel on the arm, staggering him with the force of it. "You got it." Ushna stepped into the hall and bellowed, "He said YES!"
I stood in the bedroom, making an effort to catch my breath. He didn't act like this when I agreed to have the pups with him. I leaned heavily against the dresser, my legs felt weak.
"Xenres," Samuel took my elbow. "Are you all right?"
Was I? I was a little lightheaded. Ushna strode through the house bellowing, letting the world know that I was his.
"Sir?"
I gave him a brilliant smile of my own. "I don't think I have ever been better."
Pushing some slippers on my feet, I walked with Samuel to the kitchen. He kept looking at me out of the corner of his eye. "Do you have a question?"
"What did you say yes to?"
I gave a small grin. "If you wait long enough, I am sure that Ushna will be back around to fill you in."

Lexi has always been an avid reader and at a young age started reading (secretly) her mother's romances (the ones she was told not to touch). She was the only teenager she knew of who would be grounded from reading. Later, with a pencil and a note book, she wrote her own stories and shared them with friends because she loved to see their reactions. A Texas transplant, Lexi now kicks her boots up in the Midwest with her Yankee husband and her 80 lbs. puppies named after vacuum cleaners.

SUMERIA'S SONS
Twin Flames
Songs of the Earth
A New Beginning (Silver Shorts Anthology) Dreams of the Forgotten
Surrounded by Crimson
(Coming May 2013)