Dropped Third Strike (Portland Pioneers #1) (15 page)

“Reid Benjamin,” Ron said. “I can’t believe it.”

“You can’t believe what?” Reid asked.

“It wasn’t that long ago, you were doing math homework in our living room,” Ron said. “Now you’re in the big leagues - first as a player and now as a coach. Crazy how quickly things change.”

“It was quite a while ago,” Reid said. “But, yeah, it’s good to be working with Kate again.”

“You two always did make a good team,” Ron said.

“We did,” Reid agreed, smiling. “We’ll be a good one again, I think.”

“I hope so,” Ron said. “It would be fun to see the Pioneers in the postseason.”

“That’s the goal. It’s what everyone’s after,” Reid said. “We could do it too. Kate’s assembled a fine team here. The talent definitely has the potential to go far if we can put it all together.”

“That’s always the key, isn’t it?” Ron said. “Anyway, I know you have a job to do, so I won’t keep you from it. Especially since I know your boss can be pretty tough.”

The men exchanged a smile.

“But will you sign this jersey for me before you go?” Ron asked.

“Of course,” Reid said. “I’ll sign anything for you. Your family’s always been good to me.”

“I still think you should be playing ball,” Ron said. “You’re a talented young man.”

“I appreciate that, sir,” Reid said. “I’m sure I’ll play again someday, but for now, I’m helping other players find their best. I think it’s a good opportunity for me. Might even help me when I return to playing.”

“Well, I wish the best for you, Reid,” Ron said. “You’ve always been a good kid.”

Reid laughed. “Funny, that’s probably not how people would describe me these days.”

“And how many of those people know the real you?” Ron asked.

Reid looked at him thoughtfully for a few moments. It was a hard question. Direct. Exactly what he should have expected from Kate’s father. She was a lot like him in that sense. It was a good question though too, and Reid didn’t quite know how to answer it. He was pretty sure he didn’t need to. His silence pretty much said it all. He finished signing the jersey and handed it back to Ron.

“It was good to see you again,” Reid said. “Say ‘hi’ to the family for me.”

“You should join us all for dinner tonight,” Ron said. “Then you can say ‘hi’ to them yourself.”

“Are you sure? I wouldn’t want to impose on family time,” Reid said.

He had a feeling Kate wouldn’t appreciate his attendance, but he wasn’t going to say that.

“You could never impose, Reid,” Ron said. “We’d love to see you and catch up. Please, join us.”

Reid considered the offer only briefly before accepting. He was looking forward to catching up with the Marks family, and it sure beat dinner alone in his hotel room. Ron gave him the details, and Reid waved to the rest of the family before jogging back to the players.

As Reid watched players stretch and warm up for the game, Ron’s words kept going through his head. How many people did know the real him? That was hard to say. Sometimes it seemed no one did, and he couldn’t decide if that was a circumstance of his decisions or if he’d created the distance on purpose. He had never thought of himself as anything but genuine and real, but maybe he needed to rethink that. He was rethinking a lot of things lately, so it certainly fit the theme.

Reid abandoned his self-evaluation once the game started. He needed to focus on what the offense was doing and see where they needed to make adjustments. There had been a lot of strikeouts in the first week of games, and he still hadn’t remedied that problem. He couldn’t decide if it was just a slow start or if the batters were really having that much trouble reading the pitches. They looked a little better today and managed a 7-6 win over the Cleveland Indians, but there were still some issues to correct. He made some notes during the game and stayed after to talk to a few of the players about what he’d seen and what he wanted them to work on.

The game had been over for two hours when he was finally showered and on his way to meet the Marks family. He found the restaurant and the large group pretty easily.

“Sorry I’m late,” he said, noticing half-consumed drinks and appetizers scattered throughout the table.

“That’s just fine, Reid,” Sharon said. “We saved you a seat, and you can still order. We’re in no rush.”

“Yeah, we know your boss pretty well. She’s not very easy to please, so we figured you were hard at work,” Ron said with a wink. “We’re glad you joined us though.”

“Thanks,” Reid said, sitting down next to Kate.

Her sisters all smiled at him and introduced their husbands and children. He nodded and tried to remember all the names as they went around. Through it all, Kate said nothing. It was obvious to him that she was not okay with his presence. But to her credit, she didn’t comment or make an issue of it. He was grateful, and he hoped they could enjoy a nice meal without an argument. He had always liked the Marks family. He spent a lot of time at their house his senior year of high school and that one summer during college. They had always made him feel welcome. At time, he felt like part of their family – something he appreciated right now. His own family had shut him out, but it seemed the Markses didn’t care about any of his mistakes. They accepted him for who he was, and he needed that. He wanted a family like that. He supposed that was part of his draw to Kate – he adored her family. But, really, he knew that was only part of it. There was more about her that appealed to him. So much more.

Sitting next to her over dinner was the closest he’d been to her in a while, but he was still drawn to her in a way that was simultaneously intriguing and terrifying. He had felt the familiar the pull between them from the moment he walked into her office for that interview. It was the same pull he’d felt all those years ago when they studied together. It had compelled him enough to ask her to prom. He still had no regrets about prom or any of the other time he’d spent with her. There was a connection between them he never could quite understand or deny. Time should have diminished the connection. But it was definitely still there – as intriguing and terrifying as ever. He wondered if she felt it too. Every time she brushed her hair back, he caught a whiff of her perfume. That might have contributed to the pull he was feeling. The scent was subtle, yet sexy.
Appropriate for her
, he thought. He wanted to lean closer and smell more of it, but he knew that would be too much. She was tolerating his presence – even if she hadn’t even acknowledged him since he sat down – and he didn’t want to push her boundaries any more than he already had. Because of the setting, she couldn’t pull away – at least not physically – but he knew if he pushed her too far, he’d only make her uncomfortable, and that was the exact opposite of what he wanted.

Kate was dismayed, but not surprised, when her dad told her he’d invited Reid to join them for dinner. Her parents had always adored Reid. Of course they did. The Reid they knew was a hard-working student and a talented baseball player. They didn’t know about the Reid who had broken their daughter’s heart – multiple times. She’d never shared those events with them, so she supposed their affection for him and their inclusion of him in family dinner was partly her fault.

When he hadn’t arrived before they placed their order, she hoped Reid had changed his mind or would fail to show. She should have known better. Any hope she had of an evening without Reid was dashed the moment she saw him in the doorway to the party room, which her large family had commandeered for the evening. The size of their group and their intent to make it a long meal made the party room the best place for them. It was a large room, but once Reid arrived, it felt very small.

Even more unsettling than his arrival was the instant level of comfort he had with her family – not just her parents, but also her sisters, brothers-in-law, nephews, and nieces. He asked her sisters about their kids and their jobs. Sports were an easy topic to discuss with the other men. There was never a lull or awkward silence in the conversation.

To an outsider, Reid probably looked like the fifth son-in-law. A glance at Ron and Sharon told Kate her parents certainly wouldn’t mind if that was the case. They listened to Reid’s stories with unabashed interest, eager to catch up with him like an old friend. Her mother gave her more than one wink and nod, which Kate knew was not-so-subtle code for “you should date him.” She’d seen it enough over the past several years to read it a mile away. She had always done her best to ignore it, and she intended to continue those efforts now. She gave her mother a subtle shake of the head every time she winked. At least she hoped it was subtle enough that Reid didn’t catch it.

Thankfully, he didn’t seem to notice. He was too caught up in sharing baseball stories. His major league experiences may not have been successful, but the way he spoke seemed to convey that he didn’t view his entire professional career as a failure. The confidence and joy in his words were unmistakable, and if she had dared to look at him, she suspected she might see the boyish sparkle in his eyes to confirm her theory. He loved baseball, and even though it hadn’t worked out as he had planned, it was clear he still found the same joy in the sport that he’d felt before he was playing it for a paycheck. For Kate, this realization was as saddening as it was encouraging. She was glad he enjoyed his work, but it also made her feel a bit of sympathy for him that he was no longer playing the game.

Ah. There was that pesky sympathy again. She kept telling herself he didn’t deserve any pity from her, but that didn’t stop her from feeling it. And that brought on the annoyance that seemed to surface every time Reid was around. He sparked plenty of other emotions as well, but annoyance was the only one she cared to acknowledge. The other emotions would only take her back to a place she never wanted to go again. A place she couldn’t go again if she wanted to keep her sanity. And she needed her sanity if she was going to do her job.

When the evening finally came to an end, Kate hugged all of her family members as they loaded into their cars. It was just “goodnight” for now. They would be around for a few more days, and she’d spend time with them at and between games. It would make her days more hectic than usual, but she didn’t mind. It was good to have time with her family. Her career didn’t allow for much of that, so she tried to take advantage of opportunities like this whenever she could.

As the cars pulled away, she turned to walk back to her own car only to find Reid standing a few feet behind her. Waiting for her.

“I think this is the longest we’ve gone without arguing,” Reid said.

“The evening’s not over yet,” Kate said.

“That’s true, it’s not,” Reid said. “Do you want to go get a drink or something?”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

“Why not?”

“Because you just said we’ve gone the whole evening without arguing. Let’s quit while we’re ahead.”

“Come on, Kate. We still have a lot of catching up to do. Maybe you can tell me why you’re so angry with me.”

“Now that is definitely not a good idea.”

“I think it is. It’s time to get it out there. How can we work together if the past is always hanging there between us?”

“If you don’t know what you did, I don’t see how me telling you is going to fix it,” she said. “I’m not interested in rehashing our past. As you said in our interview, I’m not interested in falling back, I want to move forward.”

“And how’s that working out for you?” Reid asked. “You can hardly look at me anymore. And you don’t talk to me unless you have to. Tell me again how you’re moving forward.”

Kate glared at him and unlocked her car, getting in.

“That’s it? You’re just going to leave?” Reid said.

“We’ve broken our no-argument streak, so my job here is done,” Kate said. “Goodnight Reid.”

She pulled away from the curb and Reid sighed. And then he cursed at himself. He probably shouldn’t have asked her to get a drink. She was right when she said that wasn’t a good idea. And he definitely shouldn’t have mentioned talking about their past. That clearly wasn’t a good idea. Her reaction told him as much. But he really did want to repair whatever was broken between them so they could be friends again. Maybe they’d never be as close as they once were, but he could really use a good friend. He hadn’t had one of those in a long time. He’d formed plenty of relationships throughout his career, and they were all valuable to him. But given the turn his life had taken in recent years, it was clear he needed another kind of friend. Someone with whom he could be real. Someone who wouldn’t use him. Someone he could trust. Someone who wouldn’t be afraid to call him out when he messed up. Kate had been that person for him once. He wanted her to be that person again, but confronting her about the past obviously wasn’t the way to get her back. It only made her shut down. He needed to get her to open up. He’d have to try another strategy. Fortunately, he had plenty of time left to figure it out. There was a whole season ahead of them.

Chapter Six

Kate didn’t see Reid for the next few days, but she certainly heard about him. Her family was as in love with him as ever. Maybe even more than they were before.

Her brothers-in-law were in complete awe of the fact that they had dinner with a major league ballplayer. Never mind that they regularly shared holidays with Kate. Spending time with an MLB GM didn’t seem to impress them as much as a few hours with Reid Benjamin. The controversy surrounding Reid’s career didn’t seem to bother them a bit. The men were clearly excited about their encounter with the ballplayer, and they continued to bring Reid up in conversation way too much for Kate’s comfort.

“He really used to hang out at your house?” asked Dean, husband to Cassie, Kate’s second youngest sister.

“Yep, he came over to study with Kate all the time,” Cassie said.

“Studying, yeah ... I’m sure,” said Abe, husband to the youngest, Samantha.

“We were,” Kate said, vehemently. “We were just studying.”

“They went to prom together too,” Samantha said.

“Yeah, they looked amazing together,” said Melanie. “I still have that picture somewhere.”

“There was really never anything else?” Abe asked, looking at Kate.

Kate shook her head. “Nope. Just studying.”

“Maybe we’ll have to ask him about that,” Abe said.

“I’m sure he’ll answer the same way,” Kate replied.

Abe didn’t look convinced. Neither did any of the other guys. Kate wasn’t all that convinced either. She wasn’t sure how Reid would answer questions about their history. And she didn’t really want to wonder about it. She was just grateful when her brothers-in-law dropped the subject in favor of discussion about a recent trade made by the Yankees.

But she didn’t escape the mention of Reid that easily. Her parents enjoyed talking about him too. Their affection for Reid hadn’t waned a bit over the years. Ron and Sharon constantly chattered on about how much Reid had changed – he seemed taller, older, and more mature. Kate didn’t agree with the last part, but she didn’t say that to them. She might have her own grievances about Reid, but her parents didn’t need to know about those. She had been elusive in her explanations of their breakup and estrangement in the past. While they were still enamored with Reid, Ron and Sharon also expressed some concern about him – but not about his career or reputation. More than once, they brought up Reid’s comment about how he hadn’t seen his parents in “a while.” He’d been vague about it, but her parents seemed to sense “a while” meant longer than just a few months.             

“Sam and Kathy don’t live that far from here,” Ron said. “They really haven’t been here to see him yet?”

“Not that I’m aware of,” Kate said.

“I don’t understand that,” Ron said. “Why wouldn’t they come see him?”

“Maybe they’re busy,” Kate said.

“We’re busy too, but we take every chance we have to see you,” Sharon said.

“I know, and I’m glad you do, but maybe the Benjamins are different,” Kate said.

“Something just seemed off when he was talking about them,” Sharon said. “Did they have a falling out? I know he’s made some mistakes, but ... he’s still a good kid.”

Kate wasn’t surprised her parents still worshipped Reid. They’d always been very forgiving and open-minded. Reid’s parents were certainly more conservative and guarded.

“It’s none of our business, Mom,” Kate said.

“I thought Reid was your friend. Doesn’t that make it your business?” Sharon asked.

Kate sighed. “Reid and I aren’t friends like we used to be. And even if we were, his relationship with his parents wouldn’t be any of my business.”

“Don’t you care about his happiness?” Sharon asked.

“Right now, I really only care about his role as a hitting coach,” Kate said.

“That’s cold, Kate,” Ron said. “And that’s not like you.”

“It’s business, Dad,” Kate said. “My relationship with Reid is strictly professional.”

Ron shook his head. “Kate, I know this industry is tough sometimes, but I hope you never forget that the players and your staff are also people. And I especially hope you never forget where you came from – which happens to be the same place as Reid. Think about that, Kate.”

Kate didn’t know how to respond to her father’s lecture on ethics. And he wasn’t the only one who had something to say about her relationship with Reid. Chelle pulled Kate aside while the others were busy with the kids, who were clamoring for autographs from the players.

“So, what’s it like being around Reid again?” Chelle asked.

Kate shrugged. “It’s fine. No big deal.”

“Really? I think it’d be weird seeing him after all you two have been through,” Chelle said.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Kate said. “We were study partners. That’s it.”

Chelle walked around to look Kate in the eye.

“I found your diary when I got your room. I know about prom,” Chelle said. “And I know what happened that one summer too.”

Kate studied her sister for a few moments, trying to determine what exactly Chelle knew about that summer.

“I was young, but I knew what sex was and I knew what it sounded like. I definitely heard sex coming from our basement that summer. Sounded like it was pretty good too.”

Kate turned red and hushed her sister, who just laughed in response.

“Don’t worry. I haven’t told anyone. I liked having a secret.”

“It was supposed to be my secret.”

“Well, it’s mine too. So you can be honest about all of this with me. I know something went wrong after that summer, even if you never said. What’s it like seeing him after all that?”

Kate was quiet for a few moments. She felt a mixture of embarrassment, annoyance, and relief that her sister knew about her history with Reid. The relief part was odd, but for the first time since his return, Kate had someone with whom she could discuss her feelings about Reid’s sudden return to her life. It kind of felt like a weight had been lifted, even though she didn’t know what to do with that weight now. As Chelle stood waiting for an answer, Kate was having trouble finding words.

“I don’t know,” she said finally.

“You seemed really tense at dinner the other night,” Chelle said. “You didn’t even talk to him.”

“Everyone else was talking to him anyway,” Kate said.

“But he was waiting for you to talk to him,” Chelle said.

“What are you talking about?” Kate asked.

“You forget how much psychology I studied before I decided to stay home with the kids,” Chelle said. “I watched both of you during dinner.”

“And?”

“And I saw the way he kept looking at you.”

“What way?”

“Like he wanted you to talk to him, acknowledge him ... anything.”

“I think I’ve acknowledged him plenty by giving him a job.”

“I think he wants more than that.”

“Well, I don’t.”

Chelle gave her sister a look.

“I don’t. I really don’t,” Kate repeated. “He’s invited me to dinner and tried to get me to hang out, but I just can’t go there.”

“Why not?”

“Because he hurt me, and he doesn’t seem to realize it. More than that, he doesn’t seem to have a clue what he did to hurt me.”

“Maybe if you clear the air, you can work on getting over that hurt.”

“Who says I’m not over it?”

Chelle gave her a look and Kate shrugged.

“I don’t see the point in talking about it. What’s done is done. Besides, he doesn’t even think what he did was wrong.”

“I wish you could hear yourself. In one breath, you’re saying you can’t let Reid in because he hurt you. And in the next, you’re saying it’s all in the past. Which is it, Kate?”

“Whether I’m over it or not doesn’t really matter. I just don’t care to re-live it.”

“Maybe you don’t want to, but maybe you need to. If he really doesn’t understand what he did to hurt you, you should tell him. He seems like a good guy, Kate. I think he’d try and make it right. Maybe he deserves another chance.”

Kate rolled her eyes. “What makes you think he even wants another chance?”

“It sounds like that’s what he’s trying to do. But, honestly, I’m more interested in whether or not you want another chance with him,” Chelle said.

“I don’t,” Kate said. “I’ve told you over and over I’m not interested in a relationship.”

“You have your work, I know,” Chelle said in an annoyed tone. “Your work is important and time consuming, and you’re really good at it. But I think someday you’ll regret making work your life.”

“It’s my life, so it’ll be my regret,” Kate said, shrugging.

“But you’re my sister, and I want you to be happy.”

“I don’t see what Reid has to do with that.”

“He’s made you happy before.”

“He also hurt me pretty bad before. I can’t go down that road again. He’s had two chances. That’s more than enough.”

“Aren’t you a baseball woman? What happened to three strikes?” Chelle asked.

“Baseballs are thicker than my heart,” Kate said, turning to go.

“But clearly not as thick as your head,” Chelle said, her voice fading as Kate walked away.

Chelle broached the subject of Reid a few more times during their stay, but Kate shut it down as quickly as she could. She’d said enough to her sister already. More than enough. Chelle was convinced Reid and Kate had unfinished business, and that her sister needed to address it. As far as Kate was concerned, it would have to remain unfinished. She wasn’t keen on re-opening those wounds.

As the countdown until their return to Portland entered single digits, Kate stayed busy making roster decisions for the Pioneers and each of their farm teams. She felt good about the teams they would put on the field at each level. She was particularly pleased with the major league squad. The pitching still presented some worries, but the offense was looking strong. Some of that was due to the work done by veterans over the winter and some was due to new acquisitions. She was certain Reid deserved some of the credit as well, although she wasn’t about to approach him and offer that praise.

In fact, Kate did her best to steer clear of Reid for the rest of spring training. She was in her office most of the time, making phone calls and dealing with business. She walked through the practice fields daily and was at almost all of the home games. But she kept her distance from the hitting coach, and he stayed away from her as well. Either he was too busy or he got the message from their last conversation. She hoped it was the latter, but that proved not to be the case as he sat down next to her when they boarded the team plane back to Portland.

“Hey Boss. How am I doing so far?” Reid asked, smiling at her.

In addition to his signature grin, Reid was also wearing dark grey slacks and a deep blue polo shirt. Every stitch flattered his physique, and it took all of Kate’s willpower not to just stare at him.

“The offense looks really good,” she said. “The hitters look comfortable at the plate, and they seem to be seeing the ball well.”

“So you think I’m doing a good job then?” he asked.

“It’s hard to tell how much credit you deserve just yet,” she said. “The season hasn’t even started.”

“Wow. You’re tough,” he said.

She shrugged. “I prefer to think of it as honest. Besides, the players deserve some credit too. They work hard.”

“Yeah, I guess I see your point,” he said. “I just hope you’ll give me a fair chance to impress you at some point this season.”

“I gave you a job, Reid. I think that counts as a fair chance,” she said.

“I’d like to think I earned the job a little,” Reid said.

Kate didn’t respond and she felt Reid studying her as she pretended to read her roster notes.

“You really don’t like me, do you?” he asked after a few silent beats.

“It doesn’t matter if I like you or not.”

“It does to me. How do I know that won’t affect your professional evaluation of me?”

“Clearly, I know how to separate business decisions and personal feelings or you wouldn’t be here right now. Just do your job. That’s enough for me.”

“It’s not enough for me. I want us to be friends again, Kate.”

“We haven’t been friends for a long time, Reid.”

“I know, and now I want to change that. I’m willing to do anything.”

“Your job is to improve the offense. That’s the only reason you’re here.”

Silence followed.

She kept her eyes on the document in front of her.

“Look at me, Kate.”

She wanted to ignore him and stand her ground, but she decided it would give her protest more credit if she made eye contact with him and was able to stay strong. She turned her head slowly, meeting his gaze. She should have known this would weaken her resolve. Those eyes were too much for her. They’d always been too much for her. Those light brown circles with flecks of green were so powerful, especially when they sparkled. They were pretty flat at the moment, filled with curiosity and a little bit of hurt. But they still affected her. She felt her stomach flip flop.