Easy Way to Stop Smoking (20 page)

Another example: ‘I'll be able to afford a better car.' That's true, and the incentive may help you abstain until you get that car, but what then? Once the novelty has gone you will feel deprived, and sooner or later you will fall for the trap again.

Another typical example is the office or family bet or pact. These sometimes have the advantage of helping to motivate you at certain times of the day, but they almost always end in failure. Why?

1.
The incentive is false. Why should we want to stop just because other people are doing so? All this does is to create additional pressure, which increases the sense of deprivation and sacrifice. If you and a group of friends, family or colleagues want to quit together, and plan on supporting each other through the process, that's great. But a pact tends to create additional pressure that can make it difficult for a group member to ask for help if they are struggling. This can turn participants into secret smokers, which increases the sense of deprivation and dependency even further.

2.
The ‘Rotten Apple' theory, or inter-dependence. With the Willpower Method of stopping, the smoker is a fragile creature undergoing a period of misery and torture while waiting for the urge to smoke to disappear. For reasons I have already discussed, using this method one or more participants are guaranteed to fail, and this failure will come sooner rather than later. This gives the other participants the excuse they have been waiting for. With the pact broken or the bet won, the other participant(s) have no motivation to stay stopped. It's not their fault—they would have held out—it's just that Bruce or Doug or Sharon let them down. The truth is that most of them have already been cheating themselves.

3.
‘Sharing the credit' is the flip side of the ‘Rotten Apple' theory. It's true that the loss of face is not so bad when shared around, but who wants to fail in the first place? The problem is that if, against all the odds you are using willpower and you do succeed, you have to share the credit with the other members of the group. I'm not one to hog the limelight, but stopping smoking is a truly major event and it's only right and proper that you get all the credit that this wonderful achievement deserves.

Another classic example of a false incentive is the bribe (e.g. the parent offering the teenager money to remain smoke-free or the bet, ‘I'll give you $100 if I fail.'). There was once an example of this in a TV program I was watching. A policeman attempting to quit using willpower put a $100 note in his cigarette pack. He had a pact with himself. He could smoke again, but before he did so, he had to set light to the $100 bill. This stopped him for a couple of days, but eventually he burned the note. I wouldn't have lasted twenty minutes.

Stop kidding yourself. If the $150,000 that the average smoker needs to earn to finance his addiction won't stop him, or the one-in-two risk of contracting a life-threatening disease, or the lifetime of mental and physical slavery, then what chance does a $100 bill—or any other false incentive—have? False incentives make quitting harder, not easier, because they force us to focus on the illusory sacrifice the smoker makes. Keep looking at the other side of the tug of war. The side based on facts, not fear.

What is smoking doing for me? ABSOLUTELY NOTHING.

Why do I need to do it? YOU DON'T! YOU ARE ONLY PUNISHING YOURSELF.

T
his chapter contains instructions about the easy way to stop smoking. Providing you follow these instructions, you will find that stopping ranges from relatively easy to enjoyable!

It is ridiculously easy to stop smoking. All you have to do is two things.

1.
Make the decision that you are never going to smoke again.

2.
Don't mope about it. Rejoice.

You are probably asking, ‘Why the need for the rest of the book? Why couldn't you have said that in the first place?' The answer is that at some stage you would have moped about it, and consequently doubted your decision. You would have been forced to use Willpower and, as a result, most likely would have failed.

As I have said before, the smoking trap is a very subtle and sinister one. The main problem in quitting is not the chemical withdrawal, which is barely even noticeable, but the brainwashing and it was therefore necessary to explode those myths and illusions. Understand your enemy. Know his tactics, and you will easily defeat him.

I spent thirty-three years trying to stop smoking the hard way and suffered seemingly endless weeks of black depression. When I finally broke free I went from a hundred cigarettes a day to zero without a single bad moment or pang of regret. I even enjoyed the withdrawal period because I saw it for what it really was—a barely noticeable feeling in the pit of my stomach, which was a signal that the ‘little monster' was dying. The truth of the matter is that stopping smoking is the most wonderful thing that has happened in my life.

I couldn't understand why it had been so easy and it took me a long time to work it out. It was this. I knew for certain that I was never going to have to smoke again. During my previous attempts, no matter how determined I was, I was basically
trying
to stop smoking, hoping that if I could survive long enough without a cigarette, the urge would eventually go. Of course it didn't go because I was waiting for something to happen, and the more I moped about it, the more I wanted a cigarette, so the craving never went.

My final attempt was different. Like all smokers nowadays, I had been giving the matter serious thought for some time. Up to then, whenever I failed, I had consoled myself with the thought that it would be easier next time. It never occurred to me that I might have to go on smoking for the rest of my life. This thought filled me with horror and started me thinking very deeply about the subject.

Instead of lighting up subconsciously, I became more aware of my smoking and began to analyze my thoughts and feelings as I was doing it. This confirmed what I already knew.
I wasn't enjoying any of them, and they were truly filthy and disgusting.

I started looking at non-smokers. Until then I had always regarded non-smokers as wishy-washy, humorless, unsociable and pedantic people. However, when I looked more closely it became clear that, if anything, they appeared stronger and far more relaxed than smokers. They seemed to be able to handle stress perfectly well without smoking, and it was obvious that they were having far more fun than smokers. They had energy and a zest for life that I envied.

I started talking to ex-smokers. Up to this point I had regarded ex-smokers as people who had been forced to stop smoking for health reasons or because they could no longer afford it, but that had a secret longing to smoke. A few did say, ‘You get the odd pang, but it really isn't worth bothering about.' But most said: “Miss it? You must be joking. I've never felt better in my life.”

Talking to ex-smokers exploded another myth I had always believed. I thought there was some inherent weakness in me, but it suddenly dawned on me that all smokers go through this private nightmare. Basically, I said to myself: ‘Millions of people are stopping and are much happier now than when they were smokers. I didn't need to do this before I got started and I had to work hard to get used to the filthy things. So why do I need to do it now?' I now knew that I didn't enjoy smoking. In fact I hated the whole filthy business, and I did not want to spend the rest of my life being the slave of this disgusting weed.

I said to myself: “Allen, whether you like it or not, YOU HAVE SMOKED YOUR LAST CIGARETTE.”

I knew, right from that point that I would never, ever smoke again. I wasn't expecting it to be easy; in fact, just the reverse. I fully believed that I was in for months of black depression and that I would spend the rest of my life having the occasional pang. Instead it has been absolute bliss right from the start.

It took me a long time to work out why it had been so easy and why I had not suffered those terrifying withdrawal pangs that had plagued all of my previous attempts. The reason is that they only exist in the mind. They are created by doubt and uncertainty. If you remove the doubt, the ‘cravings' never come.

The beautiful truth is that IT IS EASY TO STOP SMOKING. It is only the indecision and moping about it that makes it difficult. Even when they are addicted to nicotine, smokers can go for relatively long periods without smoking and it doesn't bother them. It is only when you
want
a cigarette but can't have one that the sense of deprivation comes.

Therefore the key to making it easy is to make your decision certain and final. Not to
hope
you have kicked it, but to
know
you have. Never doubt or question your decision. In fact, celebrate it.

If you are able to bring this degree of certainty to this endeavor, it will be easy. But how can you be certain from the start unless you know it is going to be easy? This is why the rest of the book is necessary. There are a couple of essential points and it is necessary to get them clear in your mind before you start.

1.
Realize that you can do this. There is nothing different about you that makes quitting uniquely challenging. Millions of Americans have done it, and you can too. The only person who can make you smoke that next cigarette is you.

2.
There is absolutely nothing to give up. On the contrary, there are enormous positive gains to be made. I do not only mean you will be healthier and wealthier. I mean that you will be able to enjoy the good times more and that your ability to cope during the bad times will improve.

3.
Get it clear in your mind that there is no such thing as one cigarette. Smoking is drug addiction and a chain reaction.
The first cigarette you ever smoked is responsible for every one you have ever smoked.

4.
See smoking for what it really is. It is not a sociable habit with some unfortunate side effects. It is drug addiction and a disease. Face up to the fact that, whether you like it or not, YOU HAVE GOT THIS DISEASE. It won't go away just because you bury your head in the sand. Remember: like all progressive diseases, it gets worse and worse. The easiest and best time to rid yourself of this disease is
now
.

5.
Separate the disease (i.e. the chemical addiction) from the frame of mind of being a smoker or a non-smoker. All smokers, if given the opportunity to go back to the time before they became hooked, would jump at that opportunity and choose a non-smoking life. You have that opportunity today! Embrace it! Don't even think about it as ‘giving up' smoking. As soon as you make the decision to smoke your final cigarette you become a non-smoker. You should celebrate right from the outset, and you should continue to celebrate for the rest of your life.

By this stage, if you have opened your mind as I requested at the beginning, you will have already decided you are going to stop. If you have the right frame of mind, your success is guaranteed. Many readers are now feeling excitement at the prospect of their new lives and are straining at the leash to get on with it, barely able to wait to get the poison out of their system.

If you have a feeling of doom and gloom, it will be for one of the following reasons.

1.
Something has not quite ‘clicked' in your mind. Re-read the above five points and ask yourself if you genuinely believe them to be true. If you doubt any point, re-read the appropriate chapter or chapters.

2.
You fear failure itself. Do not worry. Just read on. You will succeed. The whole business of smoking is like a confidence trick on a grand scale. Intelligent people do fall for confidence tricks, but only once. Having seen through the smoking illusions, you will not fall for the same con trick again so you should have no fear of failure.

3.
You agree with everything, but you are still miserable. Don't be! Open your eyes. Something wonderful is happening. You are about to escape from the prison. Anyway, it is the cigarette that is causing the misery—non-smokers aren't miserable when they can't smoke!

It is essential to start with the correct frame of mind:
“Isn't it great that I am a non-smoker!”

All we have to do now is to keep you in that positive frame of mind during the withdrawal period (three days), and the next few chapters deal with specific points that will enable you to do just that. By the end of the withdrawal period you will be thinking this way automatically and naturally as you begin to experience the delights of being a non-smoker. At that stage, the only mystery in your life will be ‘It is so obvious, why couldn't I see it before?' However, two important warnings:

1.
Delay your plan to smoke your last cigarette until you have finished the book.

2.
I have mentioned several times a withdrawal period of three days (after which you are 100% nicotine-free). This can cause misunderstanding. First, you may subconsciously feel that you have to suffer for three days. Provided you have the right mindset, which means seeing quitting not as losing a friend, but as killing an enemy, you don't. Secondly, avoid the trap of thinking, ‘Somehow I have just got to abstain for three days and then I will be free.' Nothing
will actually happen after three days. You won't suddenly feel like a non-smoker. Non-smokers do not feel any different from smokers. If you are moping about stopping during the three days, in all probability you will still be moping about it after three weeks, three months or even three years. What I am saying is, if you can start right now by saying, ‘I am never going to smoke again. Isn't it wonderful?' all temptation will go. Whereas if you say, ‘If only I can survive three days without a cigarette,' you will be dying for a cigarette after the three days are up.