Eighty and Out (8 page)

The next few weeks, Jeannie behaved like a widow who had lost her husband. She stared into space, forlorn, and nothing I said or did seemed to cheer her up.

“What do you think is going on with Jeannie?” Mom asked me as we cleaned the house.

I finished wiping the coffee table and shrugged. “Who knows,” I replied. If our parents knew the reason Jeannie was depressed we would both be in a world of trouble.

“Maybe you can talk to her,” she suggested. “It’s pretty obvious that something is on her mind.”

“I’ll try,” I said, spritzing the family room window with glass cleaner. I was glad my back was facing her, because if she could see my face, she’d know I was hiding something.

“Thanks, honey. I tried to talk to her, but she told me everything was fine. I think anyone can see that’s not true.”

“If I find out what it is, you’ll be the first to know.” That seemed to satisfy her, and the subject was thankfully dropped.

Later that day, Jim told me his dad had bought an apartment building. He said he could use help cleaning the units, spackling and painting the walls, and asked Jim if any of his friends wanted to earn some extra money.

“Count me in,” Bernice said as we sat in her room. “I could use all the money I can get my hands on for school.”

She’d been kind of quiet about that lately. “So what’s the latest news on that front?”

“We found a few colleges that accept women into the business program.”

“Any good ones?”

She hesitated. “Yeah. I made a decision.”

“And?” I asked.

Bernice looked at me. “I’m going to go to UNM.”

“Where’s that?”

“It’s the University of New Mexico.”

“Oh.” My stomach dropped as my face fell.

“My parents liked that I’d have family nearby. And that they’re progressive. They’ve had a women’s basketball team since 1889.”

I nodded, suddenly unable to speak.

“And Juan knows someone who’s gone there. He said it’s a good school, and that I’m going to love Albuquerque.”

I managed a smile. “That’s great news. Really.”

Bernice put a hand on my shoulder. “It’s only four years. I’ll be back in no time.”

“I know. But I’m going to miss you.”

“More like I’ll miss you, and you’ll be busy having so much fun with Jim you won’t even know I’m gone,” she joked.

That brought on a small smile. “Yeah…and what about Juan’s older brother?”

“Alejandro?” She seemed surprised I remembered him.

“Uh huh.” I grinned.

“I doubt I’ll see him again. Juan said he took a job in Arizona.”

“Bummer. Well, it’s best to stay focused on school anyway, right?”

“Right.”

I knew it was childish, but part of me was envious she was getting to go out west. Then I thought of Chuck, and how he’d been sent halfway around the world to fight in a jungle, and realized I was an idiot, that I should be thankful for the life I had.

“You should come and visit me,” Bernice said, interrupting my thought.

“That’s a good idea,” I said, already getting excited about it. “It will be like the trip we didn’t get to take, only better because we’re older.”

“Yep. We can do all kinds of fun stuff. And you can finally meet Juan and my aunt. It’ll be a blast.”

With that settled, things didn’t seem so bad. She might be going away to school, but we would have something to look forward to.

Over the next few months, Bernice and I kept busy helping Jim’s dad on weekends. I’d convinced Jeannie to work with us too, in the hopes it would take her mind off Chuck.

“He hasn’t written,” Jeannie said as she peeled the faded wallpaper.

“How can he? If he sent a letter to the house, Dad would wonder why his old mechanic is writing his daughter,” I said.

Jeannie sighed. Having a secret relationship continued to be complicated even though he was gone. “Well it would be nice to know how he’s doing, you know, and if he’s still alive.”

Bernice had just opened a can of paint. “If he was hurt, wouldn’t someone in his family contact you?” she asked.

“No,” she said. “His dad never met me, so he wouldn’t know to tell me.”

I picked up a paint brush, dipped it in the pan and began edging the molding. “I thought you met his dad?”

“I never got to meet him. He was at work when I stopped by.”

I raised an eyebrow, wondering if Chuck’s dad even knew Jeannie had been over. Maybe it was a good thing Chuck had been sent away. Knowing how I reacted when Jim kissed me, it was easy to guess where things might have gone between Chuck and Jeannie if he was still around.

“It doesn’t make sense to wait for a guy if you didn’t know whether he’s dead or alive,” said Bernice. She turned to face us. “I have an idea. How about you ask Jim to take his car to the shop where Chuck used to work for a tune up? He can ask for Chuck and say he was referred by your dad. When they say he doesn’t work there anymore, he can get them talking about him. Someone’s bound to know something, right?”

“Oh my God! That’s genius,” Jeannie said. “Why didn’t I think of that?”

“Because you’re too close to the problem,” Bernice explained. “Trust me. I’ve been there.”

“Do you think Jim will do it?” Jeannie asked, looking eager.

I thought about it for a moment. “I don’t see why not. I’ll ask him when he gets here.”

Jim arrived shortly after Jeannie and Bernice had left. It was just the two of us in the empty apartment building surrounded by tarps and painting supplies. He surveyed the walls and nodded.

“The place looks great,” he said. Then he came closer, his eyes filled with desire.

I had wanted him for so long and had wished we could be alone somewhere, and now that we were I felt shy, like a little girl playing at being an adult. I feared he’d see right through me and laugh. Instead he held my gaze and dropped to one knee.

“I know you’ve got one year of school left, but I want you to marry me, Louise. What do you say?”

I gulped. It didn’t get any more grown up than that. “Yes!” I said.

He scooped me in his arms and spun me around. The room became a blur as I giggled with delight, then he set me down and cradled my face in his hands and kissed me. Jim didn’t own a black horse and live out west, but I loved him with all of my heart.

His kiss grew more passionate, and then we were pawing at each other, breathing heavily. We hadn’t had sex yet, but now that we were engaged... I pulled away and looked him in the eye. “I think I’m ready,” I said.

Jim gazed at me through heavy lids, and then, without a word, began unbuttoning my blouse. When he had finished, he tossed it to the floor and pulled his sweater over his head. We stared at each other for a beat, then continued where we left off.

Things got hot and heavy quickly. Jim pulled away and glanced around the room. “All we’ve got is an empty room with hardwood floors,” he groaned.

“I don’t care,” I said, short of breath.

I unbuttoned my skirt, and it fell to the floor, then I kicked it aside as Jim stripped out of his jeans. He picked me up and laid me down on the paint-splattered tarp. He continued kissing me, focusing on my neck, and then worked his way down.

I had heard sex would hurt the first time and had prepared myself for something less than wonderful. To my surprise, it only hurt for a few minutes, then it felt good and got progressively better. Feeling Jim’s weight on top of me and listening to the sounds he made gave me a feeling of satisfaction I had never known. I didn’t even mind the strong smell of paint.

When it was over, Jim kissed me and smiled. “I love you, Lou,” he said in his velvety voice.

I was hit by a powerful wave of emotion, which culminated in a single tear rolling down my cheek. “I love you too, Jim. So much.”

Jim asked me not to mention our engagement to anyone until he could get a ring. He said his dad knew a guy in New York who knew a guy here that could get him a great deal on a diamond, so he was going to stop by his place after school. He’d also scheduled an appointment to have his car tuned up at the shop where Chuck used to work so he could help Jeannie.

With everything that was going on, I could barely focus at school. The teacher called on me to answer a question, and I had spaced out, not sure which page we were on. My classmates’ laughter brought me back to the present, and I managed to stumble through.

Once I’d finished dinner and my homework, I heard the doorbell ring. Mom answered it. “Lou. Jim’s here,” she called out.

I jumped up and raced to meet him. He stood there grinning ear to ear.

“You’re in a good mood,” I said as I stepped outside.

“I am.” He pulled a small box out of his jacket. “I bought a ring for the most amazing girl.” He opened the box. “What do you think?”

I gasped. “Oh, Jim…it’s beautiful!” I had expected a band with a small diamond. This stone was much larger than that.

He slipped it on my finger. “You’re my fiancé now,” he purred. Then he gave me a kiss. “You want to share the news?”

“Yes,” I said giddily, taking another glance at my finger.

Jim and I went inside. Mom, Dad, and Jeannie were glued to the TV, engrossed in an episode of
The Twilight Zone,
so we sat in the kitchen and munched on some cookies, waiting for the show to end. Jim and I sat opposite each other, and the energy in the room was palpable.

Jim seemed pleased that I liked the ring. I thought the ring was beautiful but was more excited to be officially engaged. All I could think of was the apartment we were going to share, and his job taking care of all the tenants. He said I could pick out whatever furniture I wanted. It was like all my dreams were coming true at once. Well, except perhaps for the western dream – but I was beginning to believe that had just been a childhood fantasy.

“What’s going on?” Jeannie asked. I’d been so immersed in my daydreams I hadn’t realized she’d come in the room.

I lifted my hand, and her eyes popped. “Oh my God!” she gasped.

“What’s all the excitement about?” Dad asked as he made his way to the kitchen, Mom following right behind him.

Jim and I stood up.

“Mom. Dad. We have an announcement. Jim and I are getting married,” I told them. Then I thrust my hand out so they could see the ring.

My dad looked like he was going to say something, like he thought I was too young still, but one look at the diamond and his jaw dropped.

“This is wonderful news,” Mom chimed in, looking as excited as I felt.

Jim smiled at her. She was the hardest person to win over, and he’d managed to charm her from day one.

“Thank you,” he said. “I’m glad you feel that way. I happen to think I’m the luckiest man alive.”

Dad reached out to shake Jim’s hand. “Well done,” he said. “I’ll be proud to have you as a son-in-law.”

Jim stood a little straighter. “Thank you. I’d be honored to call you Dad.”

We talked for a while about our plans for the future, and from the looks on my parents’ faces, I could tell they were pleased. Jim was one of those rare young men who had his stuff together.

When my parents had gone to bed, Jeannie came and sat next to me. “I’m so happy for you,” she said. “I can’t think of a better husband for my big sister.”

I was thrilled Jeannie liked him. It would’ve been awful to marry a guy she couldn’t stand.

“He’s good to me,” I said.

Jeannie looked me in the eye. “He’s good to me, too. I really appreciate his help.”

“Let’s hope he’s got some good news about Chuck after he visits the shop tomorrow.”

She nodded, her expression hopeful.

The next day, I made a point to pay attention in class even though my mind was filled with mushy daydreams, bridal gowns, and ideas for decorating our future apartment. Jim and I had agreed to get married after school was out. He’d graduate, but I’d finish my last year as a married woman, which I didn’t mind one bit.

“We’re having a small wedding at the courthouse, just close family, but I want you to be there,” I told Bernice at lunch.

She took a sip of her milk. “Wouldn’t miss it.” She unwrapped her sandwich. “I’m glad you’re getting married before I leave for college. I was worried I’d have to find a way to make it back.”

“Happy to help,” I told her, then bit into my apple.

After school, Bernice and I took the bus to Polk Brothers to look at furniture. We’d come a long way from pitching pennies together, and as we sat on the bus discussing our favorite sofa styles, I smiled.

“What are you smiling about?” she asked.

“Just savoring the moment.”

Bernice understood and smiled too. Our time together was limited. We needed to savor every moment left.

When we got to the store, an older gentleman greeted us. He was polite but didn’t seem interested in showing us around until I said my fiancé sent me on a mission to decorate our new home.

“Let me give you the store tour,” he said, his eyes taking on a new sparkle when he spotted my ring.

Bernice and I listened as he described the quality of their furniture. We sat in a dozen sofas, and I made a mental note of which ones I thought were the most comfortable and attractive.

The salesman pulled out a pen and said, “I can jot down your favorites, if you like.”

“That would be wonderful,” I replied. I giggled when I realized I’d sounded just like my mother.

When we’d finished, he gave us some brochures to take home. “That way you and your fiancé can make a decision together.” I shook his hand, promising to contact him as soon as we were ready to buy.

Bernice and I went our separate ways when we got off the bus, and as I got closer to home, I noticed Jim’s car parked out front. I ran toward him. I couldn’t wait to show him the brochures from the furniture store.

“What’s wrong?” I asked when I saw his face.

He looked down. “I just got back from picking up my car.”

I’d been so wrapped up in shopping I’d completely forgotten about that. “And?” I asked, hoping for good news.

“And no one has heard from Chuck.”

“What does that mean?”

Jim crossed his arms in front of his chest and furrowed his brow. “Means he hasn’t written them, or the guys at the shop don’t talk to his dad.”

“But it doesn’t mean he’s…?”

Jim let out a deep exhale. “It could mean that.”

“But if that happened, wouldn’t someone have told the guys that work there?”

“Not necessarily. If you were a parent and found out your kid died, you’d be devastated. You might not tell everyone. Only close family.”

I gripped the brochures as I tried to think. “We have to come up with another way to find out then, because I can’t leave Jeannie hanging.”

“Agreed. I’ve only been waiting here for ten minutes, but right when I pulled up, Jeannie came out and asked me what I’d heard.”

“How did she take it?” I already knew the answer.

“Not well.”

“Shit,” I said. “I’d better go to her.” I gave him a quick kiss on the lips and started toward the door. “Thank you. See you tomorrow?”

“Tomorrow,” he repeated, smiling.

I waved at Mom, who was in the kitchen frying onions, and headed to my room. I threw the furniture store pamphlets on the bed, then went to Jeannie’s room and knocked softly on the door.

“Come in,” she said in a quiet voice.

I entered and noticed she had been crying. I quickly closed the door. Jeannie looked up at me. She didn’t have to say the words. I knew that expression well.

I reached over and gave her a hug. “I’m going to find out about Chuck. I promise.”

Jeannie pulled back and looked at me. “I know,” she said. “If anyone can find out, it’s you.”