Elemental Fear (25 page)

I shook my head looking to the floor again, embarrassed at my reaction.

“Come on; tell me what crossed your mind.”

“What if we...” I paused and he shrugged his shoulders as in request for more information “
okay, what if we pig out, I’ll nip down for some desserts from that shop I passed, I think it was still open.”

“I’m not watching My Fair Lady
.” He laughed. “But I like the desert idea.”

I pulled a face at him “I wasn’t going to suggest that, I was going to say mayb
e
Star War
s
or...”

“I have it on my laptop
.” He interrupted eagerly.

I snorted a laugh at him and nodded.

“Cool, well I’ll go get changed. Do you need any money I have some in my wallet.” He pulled out his wallet from his back pocket and handed me it. Then he entered his bedroom and closed the door.

I smiled at the closed door and realised how ridiculous I must look, I mentally shook myself and turned to leave the apartment.

When I returned having overdone it with the snacks, mainly because everything looked so delicious – small tip don’t shop when hungry. I placed everything on the kitchen counter and seeing as Dominic was still in his room I decided I needed to freshen up. I was still in my travelling clothes and I felt grotty. I jogged into my bedroom, dragged my sweatpants out of my case and matching sweatshirt.

I sat on the edge of the bed twiddling my thumbs waiting for him to get ready. After a while and a few impatient grumbles, from my stomach I knocked on his door, quietly at first and after a moment when no one came I knocked harder. I heard his voice from inside getting louder. He opened the door and my mouth fell open at the sight.

He looked shocked at first as if he’d forgotten I was here with him, he quickly recovered and smiled at me, still talking on the phone he left the door open and walked to the window. I closed my gawping mouth, blushing at my reaction. I tried to look anywhere but at him, but when his back turned to me, I stole another glance. Dominic had clearly been in the shower, he was naked, except for a cream towel wrapped tightly around his waist. I swallowed hard, trying to fight what I was feeling inside. What was I feeling? I felt ridiculous for not quite understanding my own body and mind right now. His brown hair darkened from the water, was swept back as if he’d gotten out of the shower and brushed it back using his long fingers. Droplets of water nestled, defiantly clinging to his skin around his broad bare shoulders. The muscles in his back could be counted individually they were so pronounced; there wasn’t an ounce of skin not toned, defined or clinging to muscle. The towel hung around a perfect waist, outlining his pert bottom. He grumbled into the handset running his free hand through his hair causing more cheeky water droplets to fall down his sculptured back. I followed one, tracing a gentle path down the base of his neck, using the perfect line of his spine as a path, straight down until it disappeared into the crease of the towel. I stood on tiptoe to see if I could see down the crease in the towel but obviously I couldn’t. I realised I was stood open

mouthed, gawking at a half naked man and my cheeks flushed, and the more I fought to regain composure the more crimson my face became.

“Listen I have to go, I’m expected at a meeting with a client.” Dominic’s voice echoed painfully

through my ears, my heart sank. He was going out. He listened to the recipient on the phone.
“Yes...but...no I’m not...” He sounded strange, stammering the words out, trying to form a sentence, when he was so usually astute. I smiled as he sighed loudly.

“I’m not arguing with you over the phone, I’ve told you we will discuss it when I get there. And I’m not avoiding the issue; I’ve said what I had to say before I left. You need to accept that
,” he said abruptly. He listened again; his broad shoulders slumped and looked tense. I wanted to go over and rub at the nape of his neck, massage his tension away.

“Yes I promise. I really do have to go Vanessa
.” He softened his tone “Yes, okay, bye.” He turned and looked straight into my eyes. I saw his cheeks redden slightly, his gaze intense, I wanted to look away but I found myself captivated, we just stood staring at one another. A shiver went down my spine causing me to look away feeling my entire body flush pink. He placed the phone back in its cradle, I watched his hand flex around the handset before I swallowed looking back at Dominic.

I smiled, nervously “I didn’t know what to get. I may have overdone it a little
.” I shrugged my shoulders feeling ridiculous. “Good job I’m hungry if you are going out.” I laughed when I spoke to hide my disappointment.

He took a deep breath, “let’s have a look
at what you brought me.” He walked towards me, his naked chest brushed against my shoulder as he past me. He gracefully moved around the room, completely unaffected by the fact he was almost naked. I wish I could be as calm. I followed him with my eyes, willing myself to look away but I couldn’t, the sight was just too mesmerising.

Dominic laughed at the amount of food I bought then excused himself and went back into his
bedroom to get changed. When the door closed I let out a breath I didn’t realise I was holding. Get a grip. I scolded myself. I cannot recall at time I found men attractive, let alone wanted to actually touch one. Elliott had made sure men were not attractive to me, that I feared them more than adorned them. But this was Dominic, my Dominic. He had been my longest and dearest friend, I had never thought of another being a part of my life, it had always been him. But then my life changed, my innocence damaged and dirtied, I felt broken and unclean like I would never feel normal around men, never experience passion and desire. But here I was ogling him, wanting to lick his naked flesh, trace his ample muscles. I fidgeted feeling uncomfortable with my thoughts, these were seriously wicked thoughts. Ones that were beginning to stir sensations I hadn’t felt before.

The door clicked startling me; Dominic walked out, oh shit! I almost swallowed my tongue when I saw him. He had a black vest, and loose grey jogging bottoms, that clung perfectly to his hips and groin. His vest instead of hiding the delights underneath amplified them. My pulse bounced up a notch at the same time my face flushed again. Wishing I could ignore him, be unaffected by his body, I felt like I was on hormonal overload. I stood abruptly making Dominic step back in shock. “I have to...urm...go. I’ve forgot something in my room
.” I said, trying to hide how flustered I was. I practically ran out the lounge, I fumbled with my door handle, cursing the stupid thing for not working.

In the emptiness of my room I flung myself to the bed hiding my head and shame under the fluffy
pillow. “What the heck is happening to me?” I said into the pillow. He was the only true friend I had, who I went to when I needed to feel protected, I trusted him and when he used to hold me after a panic attack he brought me back to the world. He gave me hope that one day I would be free of my nightmare. I couldn’t stand there ogling him like a hungry dog staring at a fresh piece of meat at the butchers market. I had tried to kiss him on numerous occasions and each time he had come to his senses and rebuffed me, and even if he didn’t, nothing could come of it. Elliott wouldn’t let me go; I wouldn’t be free of him without hurting Lou. I had come here because I missed a friend.

I needed a distraction so I decided to call home to let them know I had arrived. “Hello
.” Said dad

“Hi, it’s me
.”

“Eve? Is everything
okay? Where are you, the line has an echo?”

“I’m just letting you know I won’t be home for a few days. I’m in Paris, my boss said they needed an assistant to help work through some samples over here
.” I waited for his answer.

“Paris?”  He practically shouted down the phone.

“Sorry I didn’t let you know before but it was kind of a last minute thing. I’ve had to replace someone as his wife’s gone into labour.”

“Fantastic Eve, that must mean they rate you quite highly, do you think? His admiration beamed

down the phone, making me smile.

“Yeah I think so; Mr Ealing said he had every confidence in my work
.”

“I'm proud of you baby girl. What ya’ going to be doing?”

“I am here to assist Dominic in...”

“Dominic?” Dad interrupted.

“Yeah, he didn’t know I was coming over. He said...”

“Is anyone else with you
?” He interrupted again, beginning to annoy me. “No” is all I replied. Not quite understanding his change of attitude.

“Elliott isn’t going to like it baby-girl
,” he said warily.

“I know...but...listen that’s why I’m calling. Can you keep an eye on Louise and the house for me?

Johan is staying with her but I’d feel better if you checked in...a lot.”

“Eh? Why would me saying Elliott wouldn’t like it prompt that speech?”

“It’s nothing...just....just check on her for me okay? I’m worried...with her being pregnant and stuff.” I stammered.

“Fine
.” He sighed

“Promise
.” I begged.

“Yes I promise
.” He chuckled, bringing a lighter feeling to my heart.

“I’m proud of you baby girl. Have a great time.” I could sense he was smiling and my heart fluttered back to life.

“Thanks. See you later.”

I sat staring at my phone, praying I had made the right decision to leave home and come here. My phoned vibrated with a message:

Where r u Angel? I nipped round to yours but no one was in?

I shivered reading Elliott’s message.

Working late, samples needed longer reaction time

K

Luv u x

Would it be possible to be out of the country without him ever finding out? I was going to damn well try it. Because the longer I kept him away from the house the safer Louise would be.

“Food’s ready. Get your backside out here” Dominic shouted from the kitchen.

I smiled and jumped up from the bed. I had to get a hold on my emotions and stop letting my body rule my rationality. Unrealistic feelings for a man I could never have or who would want someone like me was dangerous, especially if Elliott found out.

The food was delicious, I hadn’t realised how hungry I was. Dominic had been right the brie was addictive, but then again so was the freshly baked baguettes, so fresh I could have eaten it all and never offered him a piece. We had a large packet of crisps, or chips as they were called here. He wasn’t kidding when he said he wanted a junk food fest. We sat on the floor eating from the coffee table; it felt a little wrong with this being such an elegant apartment. I bit into my final piece of bread feeling my stomach straining under the fullness and smiled remembering we did this a lot
when we were younger. Jill used to invite us all over for lunch on a Sunday and while our parents sat at the table on the garden porch, we used to insist on a blanket on the lawn to have a picnic. Elliott would insist on sitting with the adults. That was my favourite time. Pretending I was having a meal with my prince.

“What are you smiling about
?” He asked watching me out of the corner of his eye.

“Just thinking about when we were kids; we did this a lot didn’t we?”

“Yeah. We used to have a lot of fun. You have always been my favourite person to spend time with.” He all but whispered. Shocked by his confession I remained quiet and picked imaginary lint from my jogging bottoms.

He cleared his throat then laughed breaking the tension “remember that time you developed an obsession with motorbikes and said you wanted to learn how to ride one
.” He nudged me with his elbow. “Remember?”

I groaned and shook my head burying my mortified face in my hands “No, I don’t remember
.”

He barked out a loud laugh “The look on your face says differently...God that...I nearly pissed myself laughing that day –“

“Yeah you laugh it up...I could have broken my elbow.” I held up the offended elbow as if it still bore the scrapes from that day.

He held his stomach and laughed harder; I smiled and tried to suppress my own laughter. I stuck my lip out in a ridiculous pout “it bloody hurt, hitting that barrier
.”

Dominic rolled into me clutching his stomach laughing

“It wasn’t that funny, I didn’t think so anyway. I saw all eight years of my life flash before me.” I pouted “and my elbow hurt for weeks after.”

He sat back up wiping at his eyes. I stuck my bottom lip out and pointed to my elbow. The effect was lost because I was fighting a smile.

“Aww poor baby,” he said with utterly fake concern, and then shocked the bejesus out of me by leaning over and kissing my elbow. My cheeks flushed with colour. I cleared my throat and turned my attention back to the TV. I could feel him watching me, and then he let out a loud sigh and lifted himself to sit on the sofa behind us.

My eyes trained on the TV I mustered courage to ask a question I’d been dreading the answer to “So...how’s things...with...Vanessa
?” I wrapped my arms around my knees and hugged them tightly, drawing them closer to shield me.