Enchanted Ecstasy (28 page)

"You think I am a fool, Maleaha, but let me assure you nothing could be further from the truth," he said, staring at her now exposed creamy breast. "You were not with Betsy today or any of the other times you told me you were with her. You were sneaking around behind my back with Clay Madason."

Maleaha shook her head, unable to speak. How could he think her capable of such a deception. "No, you are wrong. I never ..."

"How many other times have you been with Clay?" he interrupted her. "How many times!" Maleaha tried to avoid his hand as he grabbed her gown once more and ripped it to the hemline. His hands were rough as he performed the same deed with her undergarments.

"Kane, don't do this please," she begged as he lifted her into his arms and carried her to the bed. Knowing his intentions, she tried to scramble off the bed, but Kane grabbed her roughly by the shoulders and pulled her against him.

His anger was now boundless, because he felt that Maleaha had betrayed him.

"I will service you, Maleaha, so there will never be any reason for you to seek the arms of Clay or any other man."

Maleaha tossed her head from side to side trying to avoid his lips. Kane caught her hands and raised them over her head.

"Fight all you want to, Maleaha. In the end I will win," he told her with a grim expression on his face.

Maleaha felt his mouth close over hers and she thought she would smother from want of air. Turning her face away she tried once more to reach Kane.

"Don't do this to me, Kane! Please, let me explain."

Raising his head, he looked into green innocent-looking eyes and almost weakened. How could anyone who looked so young and lovely be deceiving? Was he wrong? Was Maleaha innocent of any wrongdoing? No —he had seen the look in Clay Madason's eyes. The man's eyes had made love to his wife. Surely he had not mistaken that look. Kane was almost out of his mind with jealousy.

"I will drive every thought of Clay Madason out of your mind, Maleaha," he said in a deep, passionate voice as he spread her trembling legs apart and entered her roughly.

Maleaha felt Kane fill her body with his pulsing manhood. She wanted to scream at him that he took from her what she would willingly have given him had he asked it of her. Her face was wet with tears as Kane used her body in anger and revenge. All the fight went out of her and she lay there passive, wishing she could crawl off somewhere to nurse her broken heart.

When Kane finished with her he rolled off the bed and began dressing. Maleaha felt like a wounded animal and held her hand tightly over her mouth to keep from crying out loud.

Kane couldn't possibly love her or he would never believe the things he had accused her of. She knew at that moment that deep inside she had hoped one day she would be able to win her husband's love. That hope was now dashed into thousands of tiny pieces.

When she glanced up at Kane he was tucking his shirt inside his trousers. His silver eyes looked hostile.

"I will never trust you now, Maleaha, nor will I ever seek you out again. I don't want a wife who has been with another man."

Maleaha did not bother to answer him. Her whole body trembled with the effort she was making trying not to cry hysterically.

Kane left the room, slamming the door behind him. His anger carried him down the stairs and out the front door. As he stood at the front of the house watching an approaching buggy, his anger gave way to a deep, painful ache. Maleaha had wounded him deeply. Not just his pride had been trampled on, but his heart as well. He loved her so much, and she had lied to him.

He waited impatiently for the buggy to pull up in front of the house and was taken by surprise when he recognized Betsy. He stood silently as she disembarked and flashed him a nervous smile.

"Is Maleaha in the house?" she asked as she climbed the steps to stand beside Kane.

"Yes," he said, thinking Maleaha would be in no condition to speak to anyone at the moment.

"I am in a bit of a rush—I want to get home before dark. Would you mind seeing that she gets her scissors. She forgot them, and I thought she might be needing them."

"She forgot them today?" Kane said with a sinking feeling deep inside.

"Yes, she was in such a hurry to get home before dinner, and Clay had come by and offered to escort her home. I suppose in her rush she just overlooked her scissors."

"I will see that she gets them," Kane said, taking the scissors that Betsy held out to him.

Betsy smiled at Maleaha's tall, dark husband. "I won't be taking up any more of Maleaha's time. We put the finishing touches on the house today. I want to thank you for allowing me to monopolize her time lately. She has been such a help to me, and I value her good taste in decorating, don't you?"

"Yes, I do," Kane said quietly.

"Well, I must go now," Betsy told him, rushing down the steps and climbing into her buggy. Ordinarily Kane would have helped a lady into her buggy, but his mind was on other things. He was hardly aware that Betsy had gone, as he stared off into the twilight. Dear Lord, what had he done, he wondered wildly. His footsteps took him away from the house, knowing he could not face Maleaha at the moment. When he reached the rail fence where two young colts frolicked about playfully, he realized he still held Maleaha's scissors in his hand.

Leaning against the fence, he watched as one of the colts ventured close to him and nudged his hand, seeking a carrot. Had he killed any hope of ever winning Maleaha's love? How could he ever make up to her for the cruel things he had said and done to her? Kane walked aimlessly, not realizing that it was now completely dark. Sitting down beneath a pine tree that was swaying gently in the wind, he stared into the night. Would Maleaha ever look at him again? Would she be able to understand the torment he was living in? The only times he ever felt she really belonged to him was when he was making love to her, and now he had even destroyed that with his jealousy and accusations.

"Maleaha, my love, why can you not love?" he cried out into the night, and his voice was carried away by the night winds.

It was long after midnight when Kane returned to the house. When he opened the door to his bedroom he could see that Maleaha was lying just where he had left her hours before. Evidently she had cried herself to sleep. He undressed and slipped into bed beside her. Kane pulled her gently into his arms, but she was in such a deep sleep she didn't even stir.

Kissing her softly he murmured love words in her ear. "I love you, darling," he said softly.

Maleaha was in a deep sleep. From a long way off she thought she could hear Kane's voice declaring his love for her. She was dreaming, she thought, not wanting to awaken because in her dream Kane was speaking the words she so desperately wanted to hear.

21

The next morning when Maleaha awoke it was not yet light. She could tell by the impression left on his pillow that Kane had slept beside her last night. Her heart felt heavy as she got up and began to dress. She tried to push her troubled thoughts to the back of her mind, but was not very successful.

Entering Cimeron's bedroom, she saw her daughter still slept. Pushing a tumbled curl out of Cimeron's face, Maleaha tiptoed out of the room.

When she reached the kitchen, Mrs. Higgens told her that Kane had eaten over an hour ago and had mentioned that he was riding into town.

Maleaha was glad she didn't have to face her husband, because she had not had time to examine her feelings after the night before.

She poured herself a cup of coffee and took it into the dining room and sat down at the table. She had hardly had time to take a drink when she heard the front door open and the sound of soft moccasin feet in the hallway. Maleaha knew it was Lamas before he poked his head around the open doorway.

"Mangas has sent word that your aunt is ill and is asking for you," he said in his usual calm voice.

Fear gripped Maleaha as she tried to read Lama's face. "My aunt must be very bad if she sent for me. We must hurry, Lamas!"

It took no time at all for Maleaha to run up the stairs and change into her buckskins. She hurriedly gave Mrs. Higgens orders concerning Cimeron and kissed her daughter good-bye. She then scribbled a note for Kane and left it on his desk so he would find it.

When Maleaha went outside, she found that Lamas had already saddled her horse and was waiting for her.

"Mangas says that we must hurry," Lamas told her as they both started out at a gallop. They rode hard all day and on into the night, stopping only when the horses could go no further. Fear for her aunt was Maleaha's constant companion. She was unable to sleep that night, fearing that her aunt might die before she could reach her.

He had ridden away from the ranch before sunup, not wanting to face Maleaha. He was deeply ashamed of how he had treated her. He had no idea how he would find the words to tell her what a fool he had been. He was afraid to face her, afraid that he would allow too much of his feeling to show. He had never been a coward before, but he was now. A coward when it came to his beautiful, dark-haired wife.

It was long after dark when Kane rode home. Seth, the young boy he had hired to keep the barn clean and tend the horses, rushed forward to take his boss's horse.

Kane climbed the steps leading to the house slowly, rehearsing in his mind what he would say to Maleaha. He would at last tell her that he loved her and had for a long time. He would convince her that he had been insanely jealous the night before and beg her forgiveness. He would be handing her a weapon to use against him when he finally admitted that he loved her, but what the hell. He was weary of all this secrecy. The worst she could do would be to laugh in his face, he thought.

He thought of Mangas, and Clay, who both loved Maleaha. Then there were all the men who hung around her at the dances. They too loved Maleaha. Would she consider him just another foolish man who had lost his heart to her?

Mrs. Higgens had heard Kane enter the house and came out of the kitchen to greet him. "I have kept your dinner warm, Mr. Benedict. If you are ready I will serve it to you now," she said smiling brightly.

"l am not really hungry, Mrs. Higgens. Where is my wife?"

Mrs. Higgens shook her head. "I'm not quite sure-she hurried away early this morning. The only thing she said to me was to watch over little Cimeron. I believe she said she would leave you a note on your desk."

"You said she left my daughter here?"

"Yes, sir. Your daughter has been asleep these last two hours," Mrs. Higgens said, puzzled by his reaction.

Kane dismissed Mrs. Higgens with a nod and then went into his office where he found Maleaha's note propped up against the inkwell.

Kane,

I received word from Mangas that my aunt is ill and is asking for me, so Lamas and I are going to the Jojoba camp. I left instructions with Mrs. Higgens concerning Cimeron. I don't know how long I will be away since I do not know the nature of my aunt's illness.

Maleaha

Kane reread the note, wondering if her aunt was really ill or if she was using her aunt as an excuse to avoid him after last night. He knew she would eventually return, since she had not taken their daughter—but when?

He crumpled up the note and tossed it into the wastebasket. Then he went upstairs to assure himself that Cimeron was indeed still in the house. Seeing that she slept peacefully, he touched her face softly. He had half feared he would find her crib empty.

How strange, he thought, that Maleaha's aunt should become ill at such an opportune time, just after their quarrel last night. He walked toward the stairs with the intentions of riding to Mangas's camp to bring Maleaha home. He paused halfway down. He had no idea where Man-gas's camp was. He remembered Lamas's telling Maleaha a few days ago that the Jojoba had moved their camp.

He considered riding over to Deveraux to ask Jonas to take him to Maleaha, but he doubted that Jonas knew where the camp was either.

A feeling of helplessness descended upon Kane as he stood undecided about what to do. Soon he climbed up the stairs went into his room, and sat down on the bed. Hanging his head down, he spoke to the empty room. "Why did you leave me, Maleaha? Damnit—don't you know that I love you?"

That night as Kane lay in his big empty bed, he thought how quiet the house seemed without Maleaha in it. She was the one who had made this house into a home. Now she was gone, and again it was nothing more than a house.

During the next three weeks Kane all but convinced himself that Maleaha was never coming back. Then he began to feel anger—anger that Maleaha should leave him and their daughter to live with the Jojoba. If that was the way she wanted it, far be it from him to try and find her.

He threw himself into his work, leaving the house before sunup and returning before dark so he could spend some time with Cimeron before her bedtime.

Jonas had sent word to Kane that he was making his annual trip to Albuquerque, so Kane decided not to tell Maleaha's father that she had left him until Jonas returned.

Kane dismounted at the barn and made his way to the house. He had purposely come home early so he could be there for Cimeron's suppertime. Each day she was becoming more dear to him. He loved the way her eyes lit up when he went into the nursery to see her. She giggled and cooed whenever he held her in his arms. Right now Cimeron was the only thing that kept him from losing his mind, he thought.

Kane walked around the unfamiliar buggy that was parked in front of the house, wondering who it belonged to and feeling in no mood to pass pleasantries with any of his neighbors at the moment.

He removed his leather gloves as he entered the house and stopped dead in his tracks when he saw his father and Lucinda Blake seated before the warm fire that blazed in the open fireplace.

Eli stood up and waited for his son to acknowledge him, but Kane only stared at him in disbelief.

Kane swung his eyes to rest on Lucinda, and she stood up hesitatingly. Finding her courage, Lucinda ran across the room and threw herself into Kane's arms.

"Oh, Kane, it has been so long since I have seen you. I thought if you would not come home to me, then I must come to you," she said, looking up into his handsome face.

Kane frowned and pushed her none too gently away from him as he faced his father.

"I received no word of your coming, Eli. What are you up to now?"

Eli took a deep breath. "Same old Kane. I guess you will never change. How about asking if I had a pleasant trip? How about inquiring if Lucinda is faring well after such a tedious journey?" his father said bitterly.

Lucinda was watching Kane's face as it became ashen in color. This was not the welcome she had hoped for. Eli had assured her that when Kane saw her he would sweep her into his arms and soon afterwards ask her to be his bride.

Kane had been almost cold to her, and she saw no welcoming in his steel-gray eyes. Lucinda had waited for many months for Kane to come home, but when it appeared he would not return to Boston after he was released from the army, she had used all her charm and persuasion on Eli, until he had agreed to bring her to this backward, primitive corner of the world. Her father had readily agreed to the trip when her Aunt Harriet had consented rather reluctantly to accompany her.

The trip had been a nightmare. She had been forced to ride in dusty, creaky coaches, sleep in horrible hovels, and eat the most unpalatable food. It would all have been worth it, had Kane shown even in the smallest degree that he was happy to see her.

Since they had arrived over an hour ago, they had been forced to remain in the sitting room, waiting for Kane to come home. They had been welcomed by some dark lady who didn't even speak a word of English.

"Kane," Lucinda said, moving closer to him and looking at him with a pretty pout on her face. "Your father and I have traveled so far to see you. Aren't you in the least bit happy to see us?"

Kane's eyes darkened as he looked down at the pale hand that rested on his shoulder. "As your host, good manners dictate that I welcome you into my home, Lucinda, although I have not got the foggiest idea why you are here." Kane had not spoken truthfully, for he knew only too well why his father had brought Lucinda to New Mexico. Eli had hoped that if he brought her here Kane would do the right thing according to his way of thinking and ask Lucinda to marry him.

A smile twitched at the corner of Kane's mouth as he reflected on how his father would react when he discovered his son already married. It was evident that Eli was not privy to that information as of yet. If Eli knew about Maleaha's being his wife, he would not appear so smug and calm at the moment.

Lucinda moved her hand over the rough fabric of Kane's shirt and blinked her bright blue eyes, which seemed to be full of tears at the moment. Lucinda always had had the ability to cry easily, he thought in distaste. He was not moved by her white delicate skin, nor her blonde loveliness, because his heart had been touched by a golden-skinned, green-eyed, half-breed Indian princess.

"Kane, are you glad to see me?" Lucinda asked in a breathless voice.

Kane gazed down into her upturned face, wondering whether to speak the truth or to be tactful. He let his eyes wander to his father, who seemed to be waiting tensely for his son's reply.

"I welcome the both of you to Paraiso. I am sure if my wife were here at the moment she would extend her welcome as well."

Kane heard Lucinda gasp. He watched as his father's face lost all of its color. Eli tried to speak, but the words seem to catch in his throat, and they came out as an angry growl.

"It was remiss of me, Eli, not to inform you about my marriage," Kane said, feeling satisfied with the reaction Eli was having at the news. Kane became aware that Luanda had moved away from him, and he heard a sob escape her lips. It had not been his intention to hurt her. It was just that she happened to be in the middle of something that did not really concern her at the moment; she was caught between the bitterness of father and son. He felt momentary pity for her, thinking that she had been used by his father in the same way Eli had always used people to gain his own ends.

At last Eli found his voice. "You could have written me that you were married, Kane. Had you done so I would not have made this trip for nothing."

"Oh? Would you not have come to meet your new daughter-in-law?" Kane asked sardonically.

"It's damned awkward for Lucinda. She traveled a long ways to see you, and this is the thanks she gets for her trouble. You are unfeeling, Kane. How could you treat a lady of gentle upbringing in such a shabby manner?"

Kane felt his anger spark into flame. How dare Eli try to shift the blame onto him for Lucinda's being hurt? He had made it clear to his father on several occasions that he had no intentions of ever marrying Lucinda. Angry words tumbled to his lips, but he bit them back, knowing that to speak them would only hurt Lucinda unduly.

"Let us just say for the moment that we are both in the wrong, Eli. You for not letting me know about your arrival ahead of time, and me for not letting you know I am married."

"Where is your wife?" Lucinda spoke up.

"Maleaha is away visiting a sick relative. I am sure if she were here she would welcome you openly, Lucinda."

"Maleaha! That is the Indian girl you told me about," Eli said, sinking down into a chair.

Kane smiled. "Yes, you met her briefly one night. Do you remember?"

Eli's eyes narrowed, and in that moment one could have seen the resemblance between him and his son. "I am surprised she would have you after the things I told her about you that night. It does not speak well of her that she would marry you in spite of what I told her.''

Both men forgot that Lucinda was present, as the sparks began to fly between them. "It would seem strange, would it not. What if I were to tell you that not only did Maleaha consent to marry me, but she has also provided me with a daughter, making you a grandfather."