Enchanting Melody (14 page)

She wasn't falling for it this time. And she really resented how her friends had changed sides so quickly. Didn't they realize she and Will had broken up?

“
Et tu
, Bass?” she said, shaking her head, realizing that, to her horror, Bass and Will were comparing notes.

“And she's such a control freak. Have you noticed that?” Bass asked.

“Have I noticed? Please, I bought a Tivo to catch all my football and basketball games. To this day, it's still recording
The Cartoon Network
almost exclusively because that's how Mel programmed it. When she stayed over, I wasn't even allowed to hold the remote control.”

“Tell me about it,” Bass said. “We once drove upstate to—”

“Okay, that is enough out of you two. You both were lucky I deigned to be seen in your company.”

“You tell them, Mel.” Tha sent a glare toward Roland. “Ungrateful bastards.”

“What did I do? I'm just sitting here,” Roland said.

Through the rest of the meal, Melody couldn't help feeling a little niggling of hope. It was like the first new growth of spring shooting through the hard-packed winter earth. And Melody took her giant combat boot and squashed it back into the ground.

She wasn't interested in getting her hopes up. That's why when Will offered to walk her home from the diner, she'd almost said no. But she agreed because she knew he was too much of a gentleman to let her go alone, and because it would be a good test of her resolve.

She'd let him in so easily. Free admission. The door was unlocked. No barbed wire or electrified fencing in his way. The entrance to her heart had been left unguarded. But it was guarded now, and she needed to be able to trust her own judgment again.

“So why did you show up at the convention center today?” she asked when they were finally alone.

“First of all, I needed to get issue one twenty-seven signed. I would have brought issues one through one twenty-six as well, but I thought that might have been overkill.”

Melody stuffed her hands into the pockets of her denim skirt as she sped up to walk a bit ahead of him. “Is that the only reason?” She looked back over her shoulder so she could see his face when he responded.

“No. I started reading your comic books because I needed to feel close to you in some way. These last few weeks without you have hurt like hell.”

Uh-oh. That little sprig of hope tried to poke through the dirt once more. But she couldn't start this cycle with another person. Was she really going to start things up with Will just to find herself years later still tying herself up in knots to win his approval?

She'd finally told her mother, enough was enough. She was free. She couldn't replace one pair of shackles for another. No matter how much a part of her might want to.

“So now you tell
me
,” Will said. “Have you missed me at all?”

Melody swallowed. She waffled between the truth and a glib remark. She decided he deserved the truth, but she wasn't going to get all gushy about it. “Sure. We had a lot of fun together. I'd have to be made of stone not to miss that.”

“Just fun?” He stopped her and pulled her to one side. “Am I crazy or did we actually have something? Something special?”

Mel sucked in her breath, pulling away to keep walking. “Whatever we had is over now.”

“It doesn't have to be.”

“It takes two people to have a relationship. And I'm out.”

“Melody, I'm going about this all wrong. What I should be saying is that I get it. I know I didn't take the time to really immerse myself in your life. I always made you come to my apartment, my work functions, my favorite spots. And I'm sorry. Let me make it up to you. Let me really get to know the real you. I like your friends.”

“That's nice, Will, but I'm out of the market for a boyfriend. I was never good at that whole thing anyway.”

“Okay, then let me be your friend.”

She snorted. “Yeah, right.”

“I'm serious. Bass told me that the two of you used to date. So, why can't
we
be friends?”

They'd reached her apartment building now, and she had to give up the distraction of walking. “When did Bass tell you that?”

“When you were in the bathroom. So…friends?”

She hesitated. “It was different with Bass.”

“Why?” he pressed.

Because I didn't love him
.

“Because I knew Bass and I were going to be running into each other. We hung out at the same places and were tight with the same people. It only made sense that we'd be friends. You and I are from different worlds. We could go our whole lives without seeing each other again.”

“Okay. I understand.” He turned and started walking away, throwing “Goodbye” over his shoulder.

“Goodbye,” she said softly, startled by his quick departure. He'd given in so easily, she thought, as a coldness enveloped her.

Spring had slipped away, leaving her shrouded in permanent winter.

M
elody
stared at her art board completely stumped. It had been a long time since a story line had eluded her. She was having one of those rare moments when she wished she were just the artist and someone else was responsible for the story.

But, she was in a unique position for a woman in the comic-book industry. She had complete control over her work, and with her deadline looming, she
had
to make something happen on the page. Hoping inspiration would come from thin air, she began to draw.

Her mind betrayed her as she attempted to show Delilah locked in a struggle with her new villain Platinum Man. The wrestling hold looked much more like an embrace.

Groaning in frustration, Melody was about to crumple up the sheet and start over, when the doorbell rang. Relieved to have an excuse to walk away for a while, Mel raced to the door. She flung it open, hoping Bass had dropped by to hang out.

She stopped dead in her tracks when she saw her mother standing in the opening. “What the—” Melody started and then she caught herself.

“May I come in?” her mother asked formally, looking very uncomfortable, clutching her purse with both hands as though she'd just waded through the jungle in her Ferragamo pumps.

“Actually, I'm working right now, Mother. Maybe if you'll just tell me what I can do for you…”

Taking a deep breath, Beverly Rush stalked past Melody into the apartment. “We need to talk. Our last phone conversation was very disturbing.”

Melody shook her head, closing the door behind her. Of course the fact that she'd said that she was working didn't even faze her mother. The woman had never taken her work seriously.

Beverly perched on the edge of the sofa, still holding her purse with two hands, clearly uncomfortable.

Melody stood staring at her mother. She didn't want to sit down, too, because that might encourage her. She breathed in deeply, trying to brace herself. “What do you need to discuss?”

Beverly's face was tight, her lips pinched into a tense line. Mel had never seen her mother anything but confident. “I should think that would be obvious. You had a very unpleasant outburst the last time we spoke and you haven't returned any of my phone calls.”

“Look, the last few weeks have been difficult for me, and I really don't need any grief from you on top of that.”

Beverly shook her head, clearly confused. “I guess I'll just never understand why you won't even attempt to make an effort with me.”

Melody stalked across the room. “
I
don't make an effort with
you?
Are you serious? You're over-critical and disapproving of my career, lifestyle and friends, and I'm the one who needs to make an effort?”

Her mother stared straight ahead, not meeting her gaze. “Yes, and quite frankly I don't know what else I can do about it. I invite you on outings that you turn your nose up at, you give away the clothes and gifts I buy for you. Yet I overheard you and Will discussing the spa and shopping at Neiman's. It's perfectly fine for you to do those things with him, but you won't consider them with me?”

Melody cocked her head. If she didn't know better she'd swear her mother was actually hurt. “Well, it should make you happy to know that I don't do those things with Will any longer, either. We broke up, remember? Besides, I never wanted to do any of those things with you because they were just your shallow attempts to make me over in your own image. If you can't accept and love me just the way that I am, then I give up. I'm done.”

For the first time since her arrival, Beverly raised her gaze to Melody's. Were those unshed tears? The older woman blinked rapidly and they were gone. “If I didn't know better, I'd think you were trying to say that I don't love you.”

A lump had formed in Melody's throat, surprising her with this sudden onslaught of emotion. She looked away, hearing her own voice quiver as she spoke. “Well, of course you love me…I'm your child. But, I know—I know that it's not to the same degree as you love Stephanie and Vicky.”

“Good Lord!” Beverly dropped her purse, her entire body twisting to face Melody. “You really think that I love you less than Stephanie or Vicky? You think
that
little of me?”

Melody's head snapped up. Her mother was clearly angry.

“You don't have to defend yourself, Mother. Despite what myths society promotes, no parent is expected to love each child equally.”

Beverly shot out of her seat so fast, Melody took a startled step back. “Melody! You're my firstborn. By far the brightest and most creative child I've raised, and you have the nerve to say that I don't love you as much? How dare you?”

Melody blinked, wide-eyed, as she stared at her mother in shock. She didn't move or even open her mouth.

“I know that we're not close,” Beverly said more softly. “But you're strong and independent. You don't back down from anyone. I admire you so much. You're all the things I always wished I could be.”

Mel's jaw literally hung open. “What?”

“I guess I never told you. If I had, maybe there wouldn't be this rift between us now.” Beverly sat back down. “I do admire you. You don't play by anyone's rules and I've always wished I could be that brave.”

Melody crawled on top of the trunk and sat on top of it with her knees pulled to her chest as her mother spoke.

“Growing up, we were the only African-American family in a white neighborhood. We were not wanted there and my parents made sure that we were shining examples in the community. We needed to prove that we belonged. That we were just as good as the rest.

“I had to dress properly, speak properly and act properly, because the moment I faltered I would disgrace my family. I always felt obligated to represent our race…to make up for every negative stereotype we bear. But, you—from the time you were a small child, you were headstrong. You were bubbling over with creativity. You couldn't paint without getting it from your head to your toes. I guess I was jealous even then. I had never been allowed to get dirty.

“And I knew that you resented me. It's funny that you accused me of not accepting you for who you are, because I always felt you didn't accept me. Everything that I valued you mocked and ridiculed as lame or frivolous. I don't suppose I gave you a lot of positive reinforcement growing up. But, to be honest, I didn't think you needed it. At least not from me. It was clear my opinion didn't hold value for you.”

Melody felt her entire body go cold, and her face tingled with embarrassment. It wasn't until that very second that she realized how hard she'd been on her mother. She was right. The very things that had hurt her so much over the years were the same things she'd been guilty of herself.

Overwhelmed with the shame of her revelation, Melody whispered, “I'm so sorry, Mother.”

Her mother nodded stiffly. “I'm sorry, too.” After the silence began to drag out, Melody met her mother's eyes. “So what do we do now?”

“We don't give up. Maybe we can finally start to really get to know each other.” Her mother reached a hand out toward her.

Melody took it and held it firmly. “I'd like that.”

 

Melody was just returning from the bar at Alchemy when she had a hallucination. Stopping short, still holding a beer in each fist, she blinked, trying to readjust her eyes.

Was that Will sitting at the table with her friends? In her absence two more chairs had been pulled up to the table, and that was definitely Bass sitting in one of them.

After being jostled from behind by a fellow club goer, Melody realized that she needed to keep moving. Roland was working late that night so she and Tha had expected to be on their own. Bass had made it known he was boycotting the new band Alchemy was featuring because they had crossed over to mainstream pop stations.

“What are you doing here?” she said to both men, setting the beer bottles on the table.

“Well,” Bass piped up, “I decided to give BFD another chance. I heard they're looking for a Web designer and I told the bartender to give them my card.”

“Ah, look who suddenly put capitalism ahead of his personal values.”

She turned her attention to the man she'd been avoiding. She hoped her face didn't look as flushed as it felt. She hated herself for mentally reviewing her appearance—camouflage pants with a faded black tank and yesterday's French braid…yuck.

“And you? I didn't realize Alchemy was your scene.”

Will looked up, giving her a casual shrug. “Bass invited me.”

For some reason, Melody felt an irrational spike of anger. “So you two are hanging out now?”

Bass just shrugged and Will nodded. “I recently realized that I don't have a lot of friends in the city outside of work. Bass and I are finding that we actually have a lot in common.”

“Will helped me make my first investment. I was telling him that I thought Marvel stock would be going up because they're making three new movies this year. Turns out I was right, the stock has already gone up since I bought it.”

Tha reached up and tugged sharply on Mel's braid. “Ouch.”

“Sit down. You've been standing there so long I'm tempted to hang my coat on you.”

Melody plunked herself into the nearest chair, between Tha and Will. Suddenly she felt like the outsider as the conversation continued without her. A few minutes later, as Tha and Bass debated about whether or not the lead singer of BFD used to be in a boy band, Will leaned over to talk to her.

“Why are you so quiet tonight?” he asked.

As soon as she felt his breath on her ear, her whole body went hot. He was dressed simply in dark jeans and a very tight black T-shirt. He'd always had that way of looking good without even trying. She swallowed hard, planning to deny everything and found the truth blurting from her lips instead. “How am I supposed to get over you, if you keep showing up?”

His smile was neither smug nor humble. No, it was tinged with knowing pain. “Getting over me was your idea. Have you changed your mind?”

Not trusting her words, Mel simply shook her head. She'd made such progress in the last few days—getting through a night's sleep without erotic dreams, and she no longer needed to self-medicate with sweets—she couldn't throw all that away.

“It's okay,” he said softly. “I'll wait.”

And strangely enough, those words freed her to enjoy the evening. They didn't have to pretend there weren't feelings left on both sides. They would simply put those aside and try to be friends.

They had a good time at the club, and when Will offered to split a cab with her on the way home, she agreed, even though she knew they lived on opposite sides of the city.

“I'm glad the two of you are sorting things out,” Will said kindly, after she'd described her emotional confrontation with her mother earlier that day.

“Yeah, we'll see how it goes. Next week I'm going to let her take me to lunch at Tavern on the Green, and afterwards, she's going to let me give her a tour of all the funky art galleries in SoHo. I'm sure it will be weird at first, but we're both committed to getting to know each other.”

Will replied by reaching out to squeeze her hand tightly for a moment. Melody's pulse leapt into high gear.

When the cab driver stopped at her building, she invited Will up to her loft, fully intending to sleep with him.

Why not, she asked herself as they rode the elevator. People in movies did it all the time. One more for the road, right? It would prove that they could detach from each other.

Melody wasn't fooling herself with her twisted logic, but now that she'd gotten the idea in her head, she was unwilling to let it go. It had been too long since she'd felt his arms around her, and after those many restless nights, she figured she deserved a little satisfaction.

“So this is your place…I love it,” Will said, taking it all in—not hard to do since it was all one room save the bathroom and her bedroom. “It's very you.”

Melody, who was singularly focused on how to broach the topic of sex, didn't think twice as Will walked over to her art board. “What's this? Is this me?” he asked, lifting the sketch she'd last worked on.

Heat raced up her neck, and she swore softly. “Not exactly,” she said, darting over to the board and snatching the drawing from his hands. But it was already too late and there were other drawings on the board.

He picked up a sketch she'd done to introduce Platinum Man. “This is definitely me. Am I a superhero?” he asked, unable to conceal his goofy grin.

“More like a super villain,” she said, chewing her lower lip.

“Then why do you have us making out?” He gestured to the drawing in her hands.

“That's not me, it's Delilah and they're not making out. They're wrestling.”

Will's wolfish grin was all the answer she needed.