Everblue (20 page)

36

ASH

I leaned against the door as tears poured down my cheeks. I could hear Fin calling my name, but I didn’t care. I wasn’t ever going to speak to him or Tatchi again. Part of me wanted to crumble to the floor and cry my eyes out, but I knew I’d never be able to get up without help.

Instead, I limped to Gran’s room and curled into the fetal position. Hopefully, the two pills I took would numb the emotional pain whirling in my heart. My best friend never had any intention of going away to college with me. How could I not see she was never going to break free from her family? I rubbed my chest. It felt like they’d stabbed me with two knives and twisted in opposite directions.

I closed my eyes and drifted off to the sound of squirrels running across the roof. Minutes later, a rustle in my room woke me up. I rolled over and groaned, twisting myself in the sheets again.

“Sorry, dear,” Gran said softly. “I didn’t mean to wake you.”

“No,” I said, shifting to a sitting position. I glanced over at the clock, amazed to find I’d slept three hours. “I should probably get up.”

She walked toward me with a grimace and pushed my hair from my puffy eyes. “How are you feeling?”

I exhaled as the fog cleared and my sweet dreams dissipated. Remembering Fin’s visit reopened the wound in my chest. I needed to talk about something good, or I’d start crying again. “Gran, do you believe in angels?”

She smiled. Her entire face lit up. “Why of course I do. Who else is going to help God perform all those miracles?”

I felt the corners of my lips lift. “Do you think we can see them sometimes?”

“I do. The Bible does say to be hospitable to strangers because you might be entertaining an angel instead.”

A small memory about that verse tickled my mind. Sometimes, when we drove as a family, Dad would give a bum all the change from the car ashtray. Mom worried Dad was encouraging their behavior, giving them money to buy booze or drugs. He’d look back at her and remind her about this verse.

I looked away and bit the side of my cheek. “It’s not a coincidence the boat magically showed up.”

Gran sat down next to me on the bed and watched me with gentle eyes. I took a deep breath and confessed what happened.

“I see,” she said after I finished, no judgment in her tone.

“But what I do remember about the person who saved me, in a dreamy sort of way, they might not have been entirely human. Even in the freezing water, he was very warm and glowed a little. I’m pretty sure he flew me out of the water into the air.”

Gran studied me for a moment with pensive eyes. “Have I ever told you my angel experience?”

I shook my head.

“Well, when I was newly married to your grandpa, I got very sick. My heart would start beating fast for no reason and the doctors didn’t know what was wrong with me. It got to the point where it happened all the time. In fact, one time it raced so hard and wouldn’t stop, they had to hospitalize me. I remember shivering uncontrollably because the blood wasn’t circulating through my body like it should. But there was this one mysterious warm spot right on my arm”—she touched me in the crook of my elbow—“as if something unseen was holding me.

“You see, one of my biggest fears was I’d die and Grandpa Frank would remarry. I couldn’t bear it.” Gran’s eyes glistened as she swallowed hard. “But I finally got to a place where I thought death was near, so I gave his life to God to worry about because if I were gone, he’d need someone to take care of him. Instantly, my heart slowed and it’s never raced since. And in the end, I was the one who outlived him, the lucky devil.

“So, yes. I do believe in angels, because mine was there, touching my arm during the worst episode.”

I looked down at the bed sheet folded over my lap. “Did your angel ever come back?”

“He’s around, somewhere. But more importantly, I feel the presence of God and there are no accidents, sweetie. You have a very special purpose in life and I’m glad your angel or whoever was there to save you. I don’t know what we’d do without you.” Another tear trailed down her cheek.

Dread slugged around in my throat, stopping my words. “I’ll never do anything so stupid again,” I finally choked out.

“That’s a good thing, but you should tell your folks and ask for forgiveness. They love you, Ashlyn, more than you realize.” She gave me a reassuring smile.

I took a deep breath and nodded. “I know, Gran. I will.”

She reached over and hugged me tightly. When she let go, it was as if all was forgiven and forgotten. “Can I get you anything? Lunch? I made some of that tortilla soup you like.”

My tummy rumbled at the thought of food. “Yeah, that sounds good.”

She looked at me one more time with forgiving eyes before leaving the room. Once she closed the door, my gaze drifted to the window, to the sunlight dancing on the lake.

37

FIN

“What was that all about?” Tatiana demanded, out of breath while throwing a pile of clothes towards me.

I caught them before they hit the wet ground, but not before Ash’s lingering scent on Tatch’s borrowed clothing seized my chest with longing and guilt. “Nothing. It’s okay.”

“Okay? I heard her yelling for you to ‘get out’. Did you mind-wipe her afterward?”

“Not exactly.” I tried to remain nonchalant as I inspected the outfit Tatch got for me. The navy blue Tahoe Fire T-shirt would be fine, but the jeans were definitely too big.

“What do you mean not exactly?”

I took a deep breath and pulled on the jeans. Telling the truth was easier than hiding what happened. Problem was she’d be just as mad as Ash, if not worse. “I can’t.”

She blinked back at me with confusion, and then her face fell with shock. “NO! You didn’t!”

I swallowed hard. “It’s not what you think.”

Tatch’s legs began to wobble. I grabbed her before she fell on the ground and pulled her toward me so our eyes were level with one another. “We have other things to worry about. You need to buy me some shoes.”

She blinked back wide-eyed, her hands covering her mouth. “You kissed her? You’ve promised yourself to her? ’Cause that can be the only reason why your powers wouldn’t work on her. Tell me!”

She pounded her free fist into my chest. The confession that I’d kissed Ash wouldn’t come out of my mouth. I looked blankly back. She finally stopped protesting and her eyes glazed over.

“For the love of the kraken! This is huge, Fin.” She pulled her arms free and folded them over her chest. Then another wave of anger flashed in her eyes. “Why? WHY? We were going to go away to college. Now she’s doomed to join the mermaid world I’m trying to escape. I can’t believe you did this to me. YOU! My own brother!”

She let out an animalistic groan, threw her hands up, and stormed away from me.

“Wait, Tatch! It wasn’t like that. I had no intention of promising myself to her. She was drowning. Look at her leg. That happened right before—why she couldn’t swim. I had to give her mouth to mouth or she would have died. That’s why I made the waves. To get to her in time. That’s why I can’t tell anyone what happened. Why the boat was floating free in the bay.”

She turned around, tears streaming down her cheeks. “You what?”

“I came to Tahoe to collect rocks for Mr. Gumboot, then I heard her scream. She fell from the boat and sliced open her leg. By the time I got to her, she was already underwater, bleeding to death. I couldn’t let her die.”

Tatch listened with a frown. The severity of what happened seemed to soften her, but the disappointment still remained visible on her face and rubbed acid into my conflicted soul. “So now what? Are you going to change her too?”

“She doesn’t remember what happened.”

“What do you mean?”

“She was unconscious. I’m hoping there’s something we can do to reverse it,” I lied, desperate to earn back her trust, knowing my promise to Ash, something I would fight with everything I had to keep, was irreversible until death.

Tatiana exploded into cutting laughter. “Really? That’s funny. There’s no cure and you know it. Poseidon!”

I looked down at the ground, terribly conflicted. Dad would know the best thing to do. But for now, I needed shoes.

“Can’t we discuss this later?” I asked, pointing to my feet.

She looked down and grimaced. “Yeah, I guess so,” she said as she sniffled, heading down the lakeside trail towards the strip mall on the pier.

Since she took the news so hard, I followed in silence, letting her mull things over. I had my own demons to tame. Ashlyn’s angry words wouldn’t stop echoing through my head as I walked, holding my pants with my hand. Going to her house was a bad move; I regretted ever trying to smooth things over. But more importantly, I wanted to tell her the truth.

“I need a belt,” I finally said.

“You should have told me before you volunteered to go to her house. That might have been smarter,” she said over her shoulder. “So what did she say when she saw you?”

I sighed, still noting the hurt in her voice. “I made up a story that Colin had locked me out of the house while I was in the hot tub to explain why I was wearing board shorts. But after a few minutes, she flipped out because she’s been worried about us this entire time. Then she thought we just didn’t care about her anymore and we were ignoring her.”

Tatch moaned. “We have to fix this. You have to fix this. I can’t just leave her there, upset without knowing what’s really going on.”

“Even if she was talking to me, what would I say?”

Tatch massaged her temples. “I don’t know. This sucks.”

“Tell me about it.”

As we came closer to town, I wondered how far I should walk with her. Shoeless and coatless, I stood out like the stripe on the back of a skunk. “I think I should wait here.”

Tatch turned around. “Really?”

“Well—” I pointed at my feet again.

She shrugged. “Right. Shoes and a belt?”

“And socks too. Oh, and a sweatshirt.”

I watched her disappear around the corner of the local strip mall and hoped she wouldn’t be long.

I sat on a nearby granite boulder and turned towards the lake. The sun lit up the water like diamonds as the waves lapped the beach. The air blew across my skin and made me feel alive. The difference between Natatoria and Tahoe showed how unbearable underwater living had been on my psyche. No matter what happened, living there permanently could never be an option for me, or Ash—once she, or rather if she, accepted me and we were finally able to be together.

At the pier parking, I spotted my Jeep again, parked next to Captain Jack’s. The
Empress
was about to leave the pier. I could only assume they were collecting or dropping off more mermen for the search. If so, this entire lake would be crawling with mer life soon.

If only the lake fed into a river that led to the ocean that wasn’t knee deep in places or intersected with dams. We’d have to figure another way to get across the state.

I waited as the Jeep sat unattended—top down—begging for me to take it away from Colin’s grimy hands.
If only I had the key. What’s taking Tatch so long?

I snuck over for a closer look when Colin came out of the store and got into the driver’s side. I ducked as he pulled the Jeep out and drove past.

What an idiot! Driving in this weather with the top down?

My fists curled into a ball, I wanted to punch him in the face for everything. I returned to wait for Tatch and paced to keep my nerves calm.

“Here ya go!” Tatch threw a bag my way.

“Dang, what took you so long? I could have stolen the Jeep back.” I pawed through the items inside. She’d gone a little overboard: shoes, socks, a belt, pants and a jacket.

“The Jeep was here?” She looked over towards Captain Jack’s. “Well, no worries. I figured out another plan.” She fanned out a set of tickets in her hand.

I looked closer and let out a groan. “The bus?”

 “Yup. We’ll leave tomorrow at seven and get to San Francisco by five. It’s perfect.”

“Perfect?” I ripped the tags off my new clothes. “If you say so.”

She smiled. “Once we find Dad, we’ll be able to come back to Tahoe and I’ll smooth everything over with Ash. Then we’ll all go to college and no one will need to turn anyone into a mermaid.”

“And you’ll stay a mermaid?”

“Mom said I could go to college.”

“In Tahoe.”

“She’ll change her mind once I tell her about the scholarship.”

I laughed under my breath at her “happily ever after story,” unwilling to argue. “If you say so.”

“I know so. This is going to work!”