Every Girl Does It (23 page)

“Anything you wanna ask me
,” h
e says
,
and then it hits me. All the shrimp, the throwing up, the talking incessantly about how hot he is to his face, the blaming, the embarrassment
...
I look at him
and
my eyes widen in astonishment over all of the things I
’
ve said
in his presence
over the past day.

“O
h,
so
it’s
hitting you
,
is it?” He grab
s
my arm.

“I don’t know what
you’re
talking about
,
” I
li
e
through my teeth.

“W
ell
,
let me refresh your memory
.
My
hotness, my awesomeness, you saying
you’re
not attracted to me anymore
,
the shrimp incident
…
N
eed I go on?” He
’
s beaming
,
and I
’
m ready to throw up again
. That
is
,
if I had anything in my stomach b
esides
7up.

Suddenly
,
I feel two
hands grab my arms
and a low voice say
, “C
ome with us
,
please
,
ma'am
.”

I mean
,
honest
ly
,
I
don’t even look like Angelina right now.
O
h
my gosh
.
T
his is how my life is going to end
.
I
’
m going to get kidnapped in Maui
!

Preston’s
face pale
s
slightly as a man in a police uniform asks him the same. We
’
re escorted to the side of the building
to a door which reads
Security Office
. You. Have. Got. To. Be. Kidding.

“M
a'
am
,
” the man in the uniform
asks
me
.
“
D
o you realize it
’
s a federal offense to make death threats in an international airport?” I look up at him and
lock eyes
on
his
n
ametag
.
Jorge
. Seriously
,
what are the odds? And come on
,
it
'
s not like I said bomb. I then
proceed
to explain
just that
to Jorge
,
who
looks
at me
like I just
confessed
to having
a bomb.

So
,
word to the wise
,
never say bomb
. Ever
. Not even as a slang word
,
because apparently
,
it
'
s like
a free ticket to jail. Which I
found out
the hard way
,
since
I’m currently
sitting behind the bars of
a
Maui
airport holding cell,
looking out and wondering if I
’
ll ever
,
in
f
act
,
see freedom. I mean
,
seriously
.
T
hey didn’t go over what you could and could
n’
t
say on th
e
stupid
safety
video on the plane
.
Oh sure
,
they tell you what to do if the plane crashes
.
G
ee
,
thanks
. But
if the plane does
,
by some miracle, manage to
stay in the air
,
you better be careful to say only kind words to other people
,
or else…

The office door opens, and I hear footsteps coming down the hall toward my cell. I
strain against the bars in
an
effort
to see
who it is
,
until
Preston
appears
with
the
smuggest of all smug grins on his face
. N
aturally
,
he didn’t get arrested
.
H
e was the one
be
ing threatened
,
and he
had the foresight not to
say bomb like I did. I mean
,
he’s not a complete idiot. Which I
’
m
just
now realizing as I see he has
n’
t come to laugh at me
,
but to free me from my prison.

He shakes his head and stuffs his hands in his pockets as he walks up to the bars and
chuckles
.
“How you get yourself in situations like this
,
I
’
ll never understand
.”

“Wow
.
S
tating the obvious
. You
shouldn’t have.”

“Ha
ha
!
I love it when you get so
sentimental. I
t warms my heart.”

“I’ll warm your heart
,
”
I sneer.

“I’m counting on it.”

Okay
,
and now I’m blushing and looking away
.
Why is he torturing me
?

“You know,”
h
e says
.
“
I
t’s
only fair I keep you in here a little bit longer after all the hitting and threatening
. P
lus
,
you aren’t so good at listening
when
you
’
re busy chasing me.”

The man had a point, not that I was admitting anything in my current position.

“So
,
I’ve decided on a compromise.”

“How kind of you
, good sir,
” I say in my
B
ritish accent that sounds more like Australian.

“Give me five minutes
,
and
then
I
’
ll free you
.
Y
ou can either get on a plane and never see me again
,
or
…If
you like what you hear, you can stay a few more days with me before we go back to Boise.”

It didn’t sound too bad
.
I mean
,
I can listen for five minutes
if it
indicates
freedom
.
A
ll I
truly
want to do is break through these metal bars superman style
,
but I’m pretty sure any effort to escape is frowned upon
in these cases
.
So I'll resign myself to the only choice I actually have.

“Deal.”
I
sit
by the nearest wall
and cross
my legs. The metal bench might
have been a good way to escape
,
minus the fact it
’
s literally chained to the wall.

“Good
,
”
h
e says
, then
he starts to pace in front of my cell. Wow
.
T
here’s
a sentence I never thought I’
d
hear come out of my own mouth. Awesome.

“Clock's ticking,
buddy
,
” I say impatiently.
Immediately I realize the irony and hope he didn't catch it.
No such luck.

“Oh
,
pardon me
.
Do
you have somewhere
you need
to be?”
he
asks
,
mocking me.

“Fine, sorry
,”
I mutter.

“Even though you
’
ve insulted me gravely, tried to maim and sometimes kill me
,
I find that I
’
ve fallen for you.” He looks up to meet my eyes with an intense gaze of his own
, which
send
s
my heart flutter
ing
like it did during our first kiss. “
You’re
aggravating, insulting, brave, hilarious, menacing, and well
,
a little insane.”

“
Point
taken.”

“But
,
” he says holding up his finger
.
“
You’re
adventurous, loving, outgoing, caring
,
and hilarious. I mean
,
you’re
in jail and all, because you threatened to kill me for
lying
to you. Talk about keeping a guy accountable. I think about the adventures we’ve had over the past four days
,
and I can’t imagine having a normal day ever again as long as I know you.”

I’m trying to decide if he
’
s insulting me or complimenting me
. Either
way
,
the fluttering is back
,
and all I want to do is kiss him. I want to kiss him because
nobody
has ever made me so angry and so happy all at once. The feelings are intoxicating
,
choking out any
previous desire
to
maim
him
.

“So…” He looks so adorable and innocent
.
“Angelina
,
” he laughs
.
“
W
hat do you think?”

Darn, I thought for sure he was going to propose
.
B
ut then again
,
it would be awkward telling all my church friends my future husband and I got engaged in a
Maui
prison. Then again those who know me well would just be like
,
“
O
h right
,
okay
.
T
hat makes sense.”

“I think
…
I want to stay
,
” I find myself saying
,
and I actually mean it. I want to stay and I want to be with him forever
. Only
he already knows I
’
m in love with him on account of my incessant blabbing earlier this week when I thought he was leaving me. Perfect. How romantic of me
.

"Great!"
he
says
,
clapping his hands together
.
"I was hoping you'd say that
."

Oh my gosh
.
H
e loves me so much
.
I
could
tell by the way he was hoping I
’d
stay
.
I mean
,
come
on—

"
I
t would have been super expensive to reschedule our plane tickets
for today
,
"
h
e says
,
interrupting m
y thoughts
.

"Wow, you
’
re the epitome of romance
,
" I snarl at him
,
not realizing I
have no
room
to talk
,
considering I somehow got myself arrested
.
B
ut
let’s
review, it
really
was
n't my fault
.
Just saying.

"Amanda,
you’re
going to have to
improve your
attitude if you want me to spring you from this place
,
"
h
e
teases
,
motioning for
the officer to unlock the doors.

"
Oh
,
um
,
I'm sorry
,
are you
threatening
me?" I ask
,
smiling
innocently
on the outside
but
sweating on the inside
.
Y
ou know
,
if that was like
.
..possible.

"Pretty sure if I threaten you
,
I’ll
somehow offend you again, leaving
you n
o
choice but to take it further
.
B
ecause
,
let’s
face it,
that’s
just
wha
t you do
.
A
nd somehow I feel we would
,
yet again
,
find ourselves in
a
prison
,
or getting kicked off a plane
,
or
out of
the country
,
"
h
e says
,
looking up as if
that
was inevitable if he cho
o
se
s
a life with me.

"Y
eah,
I
get it,
" I
snap,
cutting him off and sticking my tongue out at him again.

The
guard
shakes his head
,
then opens the gate. "I'm free, I'm free!" I
yell throwing my hand
s
into the air.
The
problem with
flailin
g
like that
is
I wasn't totally aware of the close proximity of the
guard
. So
,
naturally
,
I knocked him
square
in the face. His nose only bled for like five
seconds
,
but it
’
s
enough for Preston to shoot me a pensive
if-you-get-yourself-thrown-
back
into-
jail
-I’m-not-getting-you-
out glare. I
apologize several times before Preston
has
to physically lift me off
the floor and carry me out. Again, so
romantic
. I punch him while he
’
s carrying me
,
but
it
’
s no use. The man
is
solid
,
and I
’m
a pesky
little girl fighting her way through pounds of muscle.