Every Vow You Break (42 page)

Stephen handed her a glass of wine and raised his eyebrows in question.

‘That’s very kind of him,’ Marcus said.

Lara gave Stephen the thumbs-up.

‘He’s a real mate,’ Marcus went on.

‘I’ll be back as soon as the road is cleared.’

‘I’m sure you will. And what’ll I do about Jack in the morning when I have to go to work?’

‘Look, this is not my fault,’ Lara said. She actually felt quite indignant. ‘Get Bella or Olly organised. Or go round and see Gina. I’m sure she’ll help.’

‘All right then,’ she heard him sigh. ‘I suppose it’s not impossible.’

‘I’ll see you tomorrow evening, then,’ she said.

‘All right. And Lara?’

‘Yes?’

‘I know Mr Molloy is a world-famous movie star, but hey, no hanky panky eh? Or I’ll send the boys round.’

For one second, Lara wavered. Then she gathered herself. ‘What, Olly and Jack?’ she said. ‘I’m scared.’

‘Take care love,’ he said. ‘Don’t worry about things back here. I’ve got it all under control.’

‘How did that go?’ Stephen held his arms out to her as she joined him in the living room.

‘Exhausting,’ she said. ‘His first reaction was “how am I going to cope?”. Not “poor you, take care”.’

‘Poor you. Take care,’ Stephen said, sitting and pulling her down so she straddled him.

Later, they had a long bath together in a sunken tub that Lara hadn’t seen before.

‘I dreamed about doing this with you in here,’ he said, as she lay on top of him, their bodies sliding over each other in the scented, soapy water.

‘I love all of you,’ he said, moving her over and kissing the stretch marks that striated the tops of her breasts, the bottom of her belly. ‘I always have.’

‘Don’t ever go back,’ he said, leading her, naked, to his big double bed. ‘Don’t ever go back to him.’ He stretched her out and started to stroke her, gently, from her toes to her hair. She felt numb with pleasure. She had never been so adored.

ACCUSTOMED TO BEING WOKEN EARLY BY JACK, LARA OPENED HER
eyes after too little sleep to find her face pressed into Stephen’s scarred chest. It took her a couple of minutes to remember where she was, that she hadn’t dreamed the last fourteen hours. She listened to his steady, satiated breathing as their body heat mingled in the cool bedroom air. Clear skies on top of a soaked forest had made the night almost chilly, but they had hardly noticed.

All Lara knew in the fresh morning light was that this was home for her, and she wanted to remain. She lay trying not to wake him as she worked it out. Jack would come and live with Stephen and her, out here in the woods, and, when that Sanders woman had been dealt with, they’d go back to LA. Bella and Olly could stay with Marcus during term time until they finished sixth form, then they would choose whether they went to university in America or England. It all seemed so simple, so obvious to her as she lay there in Stephen’s arms on that first morning, in his bed.

Of course, she had broken her promise to Betty about holding back. But Betty had been proved wrong about not telling Stephen about Sanders. It would have been far better if Lara had confided in him earlier. And even Betty with her steely eyes couldn’t have stopped what was going to happen between her and Stephen.

‘Hello you,’ Stephen said, turning her on to her back and smiling deep into her being.

‘I have a problem,’ Lara said as, much later, they stepped out of the shower they had just shared. ‘I can’t see.’

‘What do you mean?’ Stephen enveloped her in a fluffy white towel that reached from her shoulders to the ground.

‘I didn’t bring any spare contact lenses, and I had to take my old ones out last night. I thought I had some in my bag, but I don’t. I won’t be able to drive without them.’

‘Now why would you want to do that, though?’ Stephen said, gently rubbing her dry with the towel.

Later, after a breakfast of blueberries and home-made creamy yoghurt, Stephen put on his long-hair Sam Miller disguise, picked up his gun and kissed Lara on the lips.

‘Won’t be long,’ he said.

‘Where are you going?’

‘There’s this package I have to pick up from the post office in the village. A very important document. I’ll be back in no time. Just stay in the living room, keep the curtains drawn and don’t go out.’

‘I can’t stay here alone,’ she said, and she meant it. ‘Couldn’t you get Trudi Staines to fetch whatever it is for you?’

‘She’s not answering her phone,’ Stephen said quickly. ‘And I need the package now.’

‘Oh,’ she said.

‘Poor you.’ He encircled her in his arms. ‘You’re scared, aren’t you?’

‘Yes.’ She smiled up at him.

‘You could come down with me,’ he said. ‘If …’

‘If?’

‘You’ll have to lie low when we get into Trout Island. And I’ll have to take a bit of care. We don’t want anyone seeing there’s no tree-on-road situation.’

So they went down the mountain in the open-topped Wrangler and, on the outskirts of the village, Stephen pulled over. Lara climbed into the back seat, and he passed her the gun.

‘I don’t want this,’ she said.

‘You’d better take it. It’s locked, don’t worry.’ He threw a rug over her and drove on down into the village. Lara felt claustrophobic and hot under the blanket, but it beat being on her own up at the house. The Wrangler drew to a standstill.

‘We’re at the post office. Stay down,’ Stephen said, as he got out of the car. ‘I’ll be two minutes.’

As Lara lay as still as possible underneath the blanket, two familiar voices approached.

‘Come on Jacko, let’s try it again. It’s just like learning nursery rhymes. What is a traitor?’ Marcus said.

‘What is a traitor?’ Jack repeated.

‘Why, one that swears and lies,’ Marcus replied in a pretending-to-be-a-woman voice.

‘And be all traitors that do so?’ Jack said, and Lara’s heart contracted.

‘Every one that does so is a traitor and must be hanged,’ Marcus went on in his woman voice.

‘And must they all …’ Jack said. He paused. ‘Yes. I remember … be hanged that lie and swear?’

‘EVERY ONE!’ Marcus roared, and Jack giggled. ‘But it’s swear and lie, Jacko,’ Marcus said, in his own voice.

‘But I was good though, Dad, wasn’t I?’ Jack said. ‘I learned my lines.’

‘Like a top pro,’ Marcus said. ‘Good as your old dad.’

‘Look!’ Jack said, his voice coming close, far too close for comfort. ‘Stephen’s car.’

‘What?’ Marcus said. Lara could smell his aftershave as he leaned into the vehicle. There was a pause, long as a lifetime. Lara held her breath and prayed Stephen wouldn’t come out of the post office.

‘Nah. Can’t be Stephen’s car, Jacko. He’s stuck up the mountain with Mummy remember? Poor old fella.’

‘Look, though, Daddy. Stephen’s dents,’ Jack said, his voice getting further away as he squatted down to point at the crumpled side where Sanders had tried to run them off the road. For a moment Lara was distracted from her precarious situation by the sudden puzzling thought that Stephen hadn’t even for one minute suspected that Sanders might be behind that trick. Or the launderette episode.

‘Look Daddy.’

Shut up Jack
, Lara thought.

‘It can’t be Stephen’s,’ Marcus said finally. ‘There’s loads of jeeps like this one around here. And I bet every one of them is covered in scratches from all the manly off-roading their butch owners put them through. Come on, Jacko. Time to go. Or Daddy’ll be late for work.’

‘But …’

‘No buts. Gina’s expecting us and I don’t want to be late.’

‘When’s Mummy coming back, though?’

‘She’ll be back to make your tea.’

Lara worked hard to stop herself heaving a sigh of relief as they resumed their journey towards Gina’s house. Thankfully, like any doting young son, Jack had believed his mistaken father about the jeep. Lara was glad, for once, that Marcus was quite so dense.

After what seemed like yet another lifetime to her, during which she had to slowly and smoothly turn on to her back under the blanket to cool down and breathe more freely, the door opened and she felt Stephen move into the driver’s seat. She heard him put some things on the front seat, then his hand was on top of her.

‘Hi,’ he said.

‘Jack and Marcus went by,’ she said, catching his hand in her fingers.

‘I know. I had to wait inside till they went,’ he whispered. ‘Stay there until we get out of town.’

Lara held on to his hand. ‘Couldn’t we just nip into the house and get my contact lenses? It’s too early for Olly and Bella to be up.’

‘Too risky,’ Stephen said. ‘We’ve got to get out of here as quickly as we can.’

She felt the vehicle lurch as he swung it across the road in a U-turn and back towards home. Lara knew they would also be passing Gina’s house and she prayed Marcus wouldn’t see Stephen driving the jeep. But then again, he’d only seen him in his circus guy disguise, so probably wouldn’t recognise Sam Miller. In any case, she had waded in beyond any point of return. She had to put herself in Stephen’s hands. Which, of course, was exactly where she wanted to be.

There was no one she trusted more in the entire world.

‘ALL CLEAR,’ STEPHEN SAID TO LARA AFTER A BRIEF SEARCH OF THE
house for any sign of intruders. ‘Are you going to be OK for a few moments? I’ve just got a couple of things to deal with in here.’ He indicated the package in his hand and his study, where Lara had called Marcus and told him the lie. ‘Then we have the rest of the day together. Help yourself.’ He showed her a tall bookshelf to the side of the kitchen area. ‘And here’s some music for you.’ He flicked through an iPod perched on a small, gorgeous wooden sound system. The room filled with Morrissey.

‘More of the charming man, then?’ Lara said, browsing through the bookcase.

‘This is newer.
Years of Refusal
, it’s called,’ Stephen said, folding his arms, leaning back against the wall and watching her. ‘But he speaks for us just as strongly as ever. He’s got different things to say, but I always get this feeling he’s telling the story of my life. You know?’

‘What would Morrissey say if he knew Stephen Molloy was his biggest fan?’ she said, looking up at Stephen’s perfect, angular features, the glamour of him, the way he was so completely a star.

‘You know what? He wouldn’t give a shit. And that’s why I love him.’

Lara smiled.

‘I’ll see you in a couple of minutes,’ Stephen said, going over to her and holding her close. ‘Don’t go anywhere.’

‘I don’t think I can,’ she said. ‘With these eyes.’

She flicked through the spines on Stephen’s bookshelves, leaning close to read the titles. There were lots of cookery books, and a couple of rows of modern poetry. At eye-level a long shelf of art books – theoretical works and monographs – stretched the width of the room. Searching though the alphabetised titles, she found the Alice Neel book Bella had looked at and loved so much. She heaved it out of the shelves and carried it to the sofa, where she propped it on her knees, squinting forward to look at the pictures.

As she flicked through the book, one page had been looked at so much it opened itself. When she saw it, Lara felt a shock of recognition. The painting on that page, of a woman called Nancy, lying on a bed with her two babies, could have been of herself and the twins when they were small. It wasn’t only the physical resemblance, though that was striking in itself. The look in the woman’s eyes – as if these two monsters had somehow landed in her life unannounced, to possess her – captured Lara exactly in her early days with the babies. The grey shadow looming on the white wall behind her trapped her to the bed. It was as much part of the story as the figures.

Lara gazed at the image and her eyes filled with tears. Trapped was the right word. Those babies had unwittingly built a prison for her out of duty, fatigue and love; through no fault of their own, they had sapped her and made her too timid.

But now, finally, Stephen had given her back her courage.

The door to his study opened and he stood there, holding a piece of paper, a smile spotlighting his face.

‘What is it?’ Lara said, closing the book and putting it on the sofa beside her.

‘Something incredible has happened,’ Stephen said. He held a piece of paper out to her. ‘It’s a lab report.’ He sat down and put his arm round her, drawing her close. ‘Look!’ He ran his finger down a list of figures, to a block of text headed
Conclusion
. ‘Read it, Lara.’

‘ “Based on the DNA Analysis, the alleged father, Sam Miller …” ’

‘That’s me,’ Stephen said.

‘ “Cannot be excluded as the biological father of the Child, Oliver Wayland …” ’ Lara stopped and clasped her hand over her mouth.

‘Read on,’ Stephen said, holding her close.

‘“Because they share the same genetic markers.” I can’t go on, Stephen,’ she said.

He took the paper from her and carried on reading. ‘ “The probability of the stated relationship is indicated below, as compared to an untested, unrelated person of the same ethnicity.” And below, Lara, it says this,’ Stephen said, his face burning with triumph. ‘ “Probability Percentage: ninety-nine point nine nine four two per cent.” ’

‘But how did you—’ Lara’s mind was whirling.

‘I’d got this lab lined up in town for a rush job. I thought it was going to be hard to get samples, but Olly’s hair in my hat, the night of the circus, was a godsend. Lots of roots.’

Lara drew away from Stephen. She felt as if her chest was caving in.

‘All these years I had this suspicion … and this was what it was all about,’ he said, taking her by the shoulders and turning her to face his own triumphant gaze. ‘I wondered when you told me you were expecting, but you were so sure of your dates I put it to the back of my mind.’

‘No.’ Lara broke away from him again and put her hands over her eyes.

‘I found out it was twins you know. Soon after they were born.’

‘If you had doubts,’ Lara said, turning to him, ‘why didn’t you come back and tell me?’

‘I wasn’t in a position to do so back then. I was broke, remember? You couldn’t get tests like these back then anyway.’ He waved the paper at her. ‘Nothing could have been proved. And even if it could, if I was wrong, what then? I did the honourable thing. I got out. I behaved like the very soul of honour. You have to respect that, Lara. But I’ve always wondered. And I’ve done my research. Do you know how difficult it is to date a twin pregnancy?’