Everything to Lose (4 page)

He lifted his head and nipped at her jaw. “Just let go. This is me,” he murmured, trying to soothe whatever anxiousness she might be feeling.

Almost automatically her legs fell open. She was still slightly tense but this was a start. He cupped her mound and spread her lips. Slowly. He couldn’t afford to fuck this up. Despite the fact his entire body was like a heat-seeking missile and his cock wanted inside her now, he was taking it slowly.

She wasn’t ready for him to possess her completely.

With two fingers, he spread her lips and used her juices to wet her clit before slipping his fingers inside. He stilled when her muscles contracted around him. She was so tight he didn’t want to hurt her.

Her hips surged upward, impaling herself on him.
Okay
, he didn’t need another hint. She was ready.

With his thumb, he traced small circles over her clit. It wasn’t going to take her long. He could feel it. The contractions from her pussy were getting quicker and quicker around his fingers.

Propping himself up on one elbow, he drank in her expression. She writhed underneath him, eyes half closed in a sensual haze. He drank in the sight of her movements, trying to memorize every inch of her petite body. Auburn hair pillowed around her face, over her small, perfect pink breasts and onto the blue, satiny sheets. Caitlyn arched her body to meet his hand and he inhaled her scent. Something citrus and fresh surrounded him, pulling him deeper into the tangle that was Caitlyn. He kissed her neck, tasting her saltiness and the essence that was purely her.

His. She was all his and would be from this moment on. Never again would they be apart. Not if he had anything to say about it. Slight tremors shook her entire body and her eyes had a glazed over appearance. She half sat up and gripped his shoulder and just like that, she surged into orgasm. In a frenzy, her hips continued to move against his hand until she fell back against the pillows.

“Shit,” she muttered as her eyes closed.

He started to respond but seconds later, her steady breathing alerted him she was asleep. There had only been a few times she’d passed out after climaxing so he knew how wound up she’d been because this hadn’t been close to their all night marathons.

Sean rubbed a hand over his face. He thought he’d been looking forward to tonight but morning couldn’t come soon enough.

Quickly and quietly, he unhooked her hands and refastened her to him. She might be fast asleep now but in the morning her arms would be aching if he left her in that position. When she threw a satiny leg over his still throbbing erection and started making what he could only describe as purring sounds in her sleep, he wanted to chop his arm off and go to the other room.

Caitlyn had been effectively ignoring him all day. He knew for a fact she’d read at least two books and a few magazines. Every time he tried to talk to her, she jutted her chin out mutinously and walked out of the room. He couldn’t force her to talk to him, so he was biding his time. He’d hidden both sets of truck keys in his pants pockets and hadn’t let her out of his line of sight once, so at least he knew she wasn’t escaping.

Sean looked up from preparing burgers when she walked into the kitchen. Now it appeared she was ready to be civil. Maybe the silent treatment was finally over. Or maybe she just wanted to yell at him. Either way, she’d be talking to him. “Did you change your mind about talking to me?”

She eyed him warily as she moved to sit at the high top island bar in the middle of the country-style kitchen. “Are you going to answer my questions?”

“Depends on what you ask.”

“Okay, where are we?”

“For starters, you’re in a cabin, miles from civilization and I have the keys—both sets—to the only working vehicle here so unless you want to walk twenty miles, you’re stuck with me.”

“You sneaky—”

“I’m not apologizing…for this anyway. Your life was in danger and you wouldn’t listen to reason. Are you hungry?”

In response, her stomach growled but she didn’t respond. She glared at him.

“I’ll take that as a yes.”

He picked up the plate of burgers, grabbed a metal spatula and walked toward the back door. He lifted his eyebrows and she rolled her eyes but at least she followed him. Once she got some food in her, she’d be in a slightly better frame of mind. He hoped.

“Are you going to tell me where we are?”

“Maybe later.” Darkness was already falling so he doubted she’d try to escape in the middle of the night.

Again.

If she did, he’d cuff her to the bed again. The thought brought a smile to his face.

“So, do you actually think it’s okay to kidnap your wife? What the hell did you give me anyway?” Standing inches from him, she crossed her arms over her chest as he fired up the grill.

Damn, she looked sexy when she was pissed. “First, if it means protecting you, then yeah. Second, I gave you a natural sedative. What else was I supposed to do with you being so stubborn?”

“Well, you could’ve—”

“Can we please put down the weapons for a little while and enjoy each other’s company? Shit, Caitlyn, I just want to spend time with you. Do I think it’s fucked up that I had to kidnap you to do it? Hell yeah but we’re here now so deal with it.” Out of the corner of his eye, he saw her drop her arms against her sides.

“So…do you want to eat out here or inside?” she asked after a few long moments passed.

He shrugged and smothered a smile. At least she wasn’t arguing anymore. “How about out here?” The back deck provided an incredibly intimate atmosphere. Though it was dark, it overlooked a lake that currently looked like a piece of beautiful, untouched glass. A full moon hung in the sky, giving them enough natural light combined with the dim outside ones.

“Okay.” She went back inside, presumably to grab plates and utensils. He was surprised when she also carried out a bottle of wine and two glasses. For once he resisted the urge to help her. He knew she needed to keep her hands busy and gain back some of the control he’d taken from her. It was small but if there was one thing he knew about Caitlyn, it was that she needed control to feel normal.

“I’ll be back in a few minutes.” He didn’t miss the gleam in her eye—one he hadn’t seen in quite a while—so he didn’t question her. He patted his pants pocket. Both sets of keys were still in there. Unless she’d learned to hotwire a car in the past year, she wasn’t going anywhere.

She returned ten minutes later just as he was serving their food.

His breath caught. Despite the cooler weather, she’d changed from jeans and a T-shirt to a formfitting, knee length, halter-style emerald green dress and a light sweater. He swallowed hard and tried to hide his physical reaction. Not that it did any good. His cock strained painfully against his jeans.

Her nipples were visible through her dress and through the sheer material he couldn’t see any sort of lines. Was she even wearing anything underneath? He wiped sweaty palms on his jeans.

“You look great,” he managed to choke out.

A light tinge of pink painted her cheeks. “Thanks,” she murmured before taking a seat.

They ate in comfortable silence, though she basically pushed her food around, choosing to sip on her white wine.

As the meal progressed, Sean watched Caitlyn out of the corner of his eye. She stared out at the still lake water but he could tell she wasn’t seeing anything. Even from his limited perspective, he could tell she was more or less staring into space and she kept chewing on her bottom lip. He’d give anything to know what was going on in that pretty head of hers.

There was a lot they needed to talk about and he knew he should be the one to start the conversation. “How’s work been?”

She glanced back at him with narrowed eyes and he guessed she was gauging his expression to see if he was being serious or not. That probably had something to do with the fact that he normally had a smart-ass comment ready where her work was involved.

She shrugged. “It’s been good but tough. The tribal warfare seems never ending.”

“Has your group taken any direct hits?” His throat clenched as he waited for the answer.

Her expression softened. “No, but thanks for asking. Relatively speaking, we’ve been lucky. I left Kabul and for the past six months, I’ve been working with a medical group that has long-standing ties in the northern region. I just hate that people die from something like dysentery…” She stopped as if she thought she was rambling. “Anyway, I didn’t tell you because…”

When she didn’t continue, he finished for her. “Because you didn’t want me to worry.”

“Yeah. I knew you had a lot on your plate and didn’t want to add any more.”

He sat in silence, drinking in her profile as she stared out at the water. Her neck was long and graceful, her features nearly flawless, except for a tiny faded, white scar on the side of her jaw. He smiled and started to ask her another question when her last comment sank in. “Wait a minute, how did you know I had a lot on my plate?”

She turned back around and met his gaze. Her cheeks flushed and her slim shoulders lifted. “I’ve been in touch with Captain Jones. It’s not like he gave me any big details, just that you were always working. And that you were still alive.”

Right then, he knew they still had a chance. If she cared enough to check on him, they could work things out. It wouldn’t be simple but he was willing to fight for them.

Caitlyn glanced over and had to remind herself to breathe as she stared at the man across from her. The man who had stolen her heart from practically their first date. She sighed and took another sip of her wine. When he moved his hand to link fingers with hers, a tingle shot straight to her pussy at the unexpected gesture. Involuntarily, she shivered as memories of his talented hands danced in her head. Last night had certainly been a vivid reminder.

He might drive her crazy but she’d missed him. In more ways than one. Sleeping in the same bed as him the night before had been absolute torture. She’d woken up once and he’d been fast asleep. It had taken all her restraint not to wake him up and finish what they’d started.

If she hadn’t been so tired after he’d given her the most intense orgasm she’d had in so long it was embarrassing, she knew what would have happened.

What was going to happen. And soon.

The words were out of her mouth before she could rein them in. “Do you want to move to the Adirondack Chairs?”

He nodded and stood but started picking up the plates. She stopped him with her hand. “We’ll get them later.” She didn’t have to spell out what she meant, she was sure the silent invitation in her eyes was enough to convince him to do what she said. It was probably a huge mistake but after a year of sleeping alone, maybe having one last fling with him wasn’t such a bad idea. She hadn’t had sex since the night she’d left him and God knew there were times in the past year she’d needed a release.

They walked the few feet to the lounge chairs and when he sat back on the elongated, green and white striped cushioned seat, she didn’t sit next to him.

Instead, she straddled him, letting her dress ride up to her thighs. She didn’t know how much clearer she could be about what she wanted.

Intentionally, she hadn’t worn anything under the dress. Next morning she would set up some ground rules but for tonight she was going to enjoy herself. On some level, she’d known this would happen tonight. It was inevitable. Like the rising of the sun. It was the reason she’d ignored him all day. To control herself until they talked about the future.

He adjusted slightly, rubbing against her folds.

They could talk later.

“Honey, are you sure?” he rasped out as she tugged down the zipper of his pants.

“Yes.” And she was.

“I need to grab a condom.” He leaned forward and reached for his back pocket.

“You won’t need one. I’m still on the pill.” She was on the pill because of the realities of her work. Something that shouldn’t surprise him.

His huge body stilled, except for the unhitched movements of his chest.

That’s when reality hit her and her stomach roiled. “Have you been with someone else?”

His eyes widened and he choked on air. “No, God no. I bought these before, on the way to the hotel—”

Unexpected, almost violent relief forked through her entire body. “I haven’t either.” She leaned forward and kissed him.

When he didn’t protest, she continued kissing him as she rubbed her pussy over his cock. Their kiss was surprisingly gentle, not what she’d expected. He teased and tugged her bottom lip almost playfully so she gripped his penis. She didn’t want sweet tonight. She slid her hands up and down the length of his shaft, savoring the feel of him. His cock pulsed under her grasp and her abdominal muscles clenched in anticipation.

Slowly, she leaned up and positioned her pussy at the tip of his penis. Before she could contemplate teasing him, his hips surged upward, penetrating her fully. She sucked in a deep breath and tried to steady herself. His fingers had been an intrusion last night. Her body needed to adjust. Her muscles tightened around him, milking him, yet she didn’t move.

She heard more than felt, the back zipper of her dress come undone. When the top part of her dress fell away, she shivered. The worshipful expression on his face when her breasts were bared pulled at her heartstrings. He covered them with his strong, calloused hands, flicking and teasing her already peaked nipples.

With little restraint, she started riding him, taking him as deep as she could. Each time he pressed into her, she wanted to melt from pure pleasure. How many nights had she lain awake thinking of this? Of him?

They’d done a lot of things and made love countless ways but never outside.

With one hand she gripped the back of the wood and leather chair and increased her momentum, wishing she had his handcuffs. The thought of Sean powerless turned her on even more. Something she hadn’t thought possible.

With her other hand, she reached down and massaged her clit. Instinctively she arched her back to give him better access to her breasts. His talented tongue was what she wanted on them, not his hands.

When he took over with his mouth, his hands moved to her hips. He held her tightly, in an immovable embrace. She desperately needed to increase her movements but it seemed he was intent on foreplay. Or maybe he was just torturing her. Hell, it was probably a bit of both.

“What are you trying to do to me?” she groaned.

“This is payback for a year without you. For a year of using my fist when I could’ve had your pussy,” he growled.

She might have laughed at the intent expression on his face if the ache between her legs wasn’t so acute. Her body screamed for release and he was intent on keeping her immobile.

His hold tightened, keeping her perfectly in place. Involuntarily, her vagina made quick, tight contractions, milking him with a fervent intensity. She struggled against his vice-like grip. Even if he moved just a little, she’d come. She was so close it bordered on pain.

“Move damn it,” she managed to gasp out.

Mercifully, he let go. She seized the back of the chair and found her momentum again. In a frenzy she rode him hard and with absolute abandon. She’d be sore in the morning but right now she didn’t care.

Her body had been near release for too long and she was right on the edge. His mouth captured one of her breasts again and he sucked hard on her nipple. The sudden, erotic pull pushed her over the edge.

She wrapped her arms around him and held on through the final tremors.

Still inside her and still rock hard, Sean stood. Too weak to ask questions, she wrapped her legs around his waist and allowed him to carry her inside.

Seconds later she was flat on her back in her bedroom. The sheets cooled her back but did nothing to cool the rest of her body.