Ex-Factor (Diamond Girls) (23 page)

Still, the view of the stage was great, and despite the tight quarters, I couldn’t help but feel energized as I watched the lower level teams take the mat.

I tugged on Erin’s ponytail with a quick “hey,” and frowned when she signaled she had a pair of ear buds in and couldn’t hear me.

Claire glanced over her shoulder at me and shook her head. It looked like Erin’s mood hadn’t improved any. I couldn’t blame her. I just hoped for her sake, as well as the team’s, she could rein in her pain while we performed.

Two hours and a bottle of water later, I was itching to get out of my seat. The tight quarters gave me the willies, and I had to pee something fierce. Diamond was due to report to the warm-up room in twenty minutes, so it was pee now, or risk an accident later.

I pulled my cell phone out of my cheer bag and swiped my finger across the screen. My heart fell when I saw there were no new text messages. When I’d asked Bodie if he wanted to come and watch us perform today, he’d regrettably informed me that he had a full day of lessons booked at the ranch, one of which was little Gracie, but that he’d try to come if he could. I couldn’t begrudge the little girl of her time with Bodie but secretly hoped he’d figure a way to make it out. “I’m gonna hit the bathroom,” I shouted over my left shoulder, earning a nod from Livvie.

Claire and Tayla had disappeared an hour earlier, having spotted some friends from a neighboring gym. It was nice to see them hanging with the competition and getting along. Not all athletes shared their attitude, and often glared and snapped at their rivals. I’d inadvertently bumped into a girl from one of the level five teams X-Factor was competing against and earned myself a biting comment and nasty glare, learning this lesson firsthand.

Lips pursed, I glanced down at Erin, who’d slumped down into her seat and fallen asleep, and shook my head. How she’d managed to nod off with the loud cheer music blasting throughout the room, I’d never know. Well, scratch that. Stress will jack you up, do weird things to your body, and Erin was filled-to-bursting. Better she sleep, I supposed, than pull another Jerry Springer episode and chew someone a new butthole out of anger. I left her to sleep, figuring Livvie would wake her up in a few when it was time to hit the warm-up room.

I wove my way through the massive throng of people milling in front of the snack bars lining the facility, a little surprised to see they were selling beer at the event. The girls had told me some pretty shocking stories about overzealous cheer moms and the psycho crap they sometimes pulled. Adding alcohol to the mix couldn’t be a good thing.

The line at the ladies’ room extended about twenty feet out the door, a mixture of athletes, cheer moms, and little kids doing potty dances snaking along the inside wall of the building. I fell in behind a gray-haired woman wearing a black zip sweatshirt with the words “Cheer Grandma” written in rhinestone lettering on the back. I giggled. Apparently, cheer pride ran generations deep.

By the time I finally made it into the actual bathroom, I was sure I was going to float away. I stared at myself in the smudged mirror as I washed my hands, shocked by the reflection staring back at me.

I missed my parents terribly, but the mask of pain that had decorated my features for the past year, and especially the past three months, had faded. There was a brightness behind my eyes, and the corners of my mouth turned up instead of down.

Damn.
The change had happened without my even realizing it. I was happy. And even more shocking, I was okay with being happy.

I adjusted the large sparkly bow sitting on top of my head, and eyed my faux tan with a chuckle. Livvie had insisted it was a criminal offense to take the mat looking like a Casper wannabe, so we’d each coughed up twenty-five bucks for a spray tan. My new, darker skin looked great beneath my sporty new uniform, and I smiled.

Livvie, Bodie, my therapist. They’d all been telling me the same thing: it was okay to move forward with my life and to experience joy. But, for whatever reason—pure stubborn stupidity and guilt on my part, really—I’d ignored them up until now. I wouldn’t be ignoring their sound advice any longer. A wasted life wouldn’t bring back my dad, and it sure as heck wouldn’t make my mom remember me. The best way to honor their memories would be to live my life to the fullest, and to be the best person I could be.

I smiled as I waltzed out of the restroom. My best self was going to kick some serious ass on the mat.

The bubble of positivity I’d cocooned myself in burst when Eli emerged from amidst the bustling crowd. Trapped between a wall of athletes jutting out of the bathroom on the left and a cart selling frozen ice cream pellets on the right, I had no room for escape and my heart dropped instantly.

Dressed in dark denim, a red zip hoodie, and a hat, he strolled over to me like he owned the place and flashed his famous million-dollar smile. He stuck his chin out by way of greeting and jammed his hands into his pockets. “I was hoping I’d run into you.”

My stomach rolled. “Funny,” I said with a sneer. “Can’t say the same about you.”

His face fell, and he puffed out a labored breath before nodding. “Okay. All right. I deserve that. I was a jerk the other day.”

I felt my eyebrows draw together. What was he up to? Since when did he admit fault, or wrongdoing? “What are you doing here, anyway?”

He cocked his head to the side and grinned. “Callie asked me to come. And I, uh,” he stepped forward until he was nearly on top of me, and plucked a strand of hair off my shoulder, rubbing it between his fingers, “didn’t want to miss out on a chance to see you work your magic in that tiny little uniform. You look amazing, Nev.”

“Ick! Please!” I gagged. I darted to the right in an attempt to duck past him, but he was quick and sidestepped me, blocking my path with a low chuckle.

Exasperated, I threw up my hands and huffed. “Leave me alone, Eli. I don’t have time for this!”

He hesitated, something that looked a lot like resolution flashing behind his emerald eyes. He came at me with a low “well, maybe you’ll have time for this.” Before I knew it, his lips were pressed against mine in a punishing kiss that was no doubt meant to sway my feelings. I wanted to scream. I did scream.

“Ack! Get off me,” I roared and shoved him as hard as I could. “What is the matter with you?” I swiped away the remnants of his sloppy kiss and scowled. “Why can you not get it into your head that I don’t want anything to do with you?”

He grabbed me by the wrist as I brushed past him, pulling me back toward him against my will.

“What. The. Hell.” Callie’s grating exclamation carried across the plethora of voices crowding the hallway.

Crap.
I closed my eyes and winced. As if things weren’t bad enough. I was smack dab in the middle of a drama sandwich. Hold the mayo.

I held up my hand as I tried to placate her. “Trust me, Callie. It’s not what it looked like.”

“The hell it’s not,” she bellowed. “I’ve seen you two talking before. I’ve been in his phone, seen your messages!”

That last little tidbit earned a shocked glance from Eli.

Callie continued shouting. “I warned you before, stupid girl. Eli is mine!” She lunged for me, teeth clenched, face beet red and pinched into a mask of hatred.

“Hey, hey, hey!” Eli shot his hands out and held Callie back. He pegged her with a harsh stare and shook his head. “Callie Girl, I don’t know what’s goin’ on in that head of yours, but let’s get one thing straight. You and I,” he gestured back and forth between them, “aren’t together.”

Her face fell. “What?” She turned away from me and focused all her attention on Eli. “But, I thought after the other night we… I thought we were back together.”

Eli stepped forward, eyes narrowed, and placed a hand on Callie’s shoulder. “The other night was fun, sure, but it was just sex. I don’t know what I can say to make this any clearer for you Callie, but,” he leaned down so that their eyes were at the same level, “you and I aren’t a couple. We weren’t together after homecoming last year, and we’re not together now.”

Callie’s face crumpled and she stepped back with a small gasp. “But… you let me do all those things to you. And…” Her face flushed and she started hyperventilating.

I had no love whatsoever for the girl, but watching Callie fall apart in front of the boy she very obviously cared about tugged at my heartstrings. No one deserved to be used and abused. Not even mean girls like Callie.

Eli dropped his arm to his side and shrugged. “I don’t know what to tell you, Callie. I thought it was pretty clear we were just messing around. And for the record, the girl I decide to settle down with and make my own won’t be so eager to spread her legs and give it up. She’ll have more respect for herself.”

Callie gasped.

My jaw dropped, and I was sure my eyes had popped from their sockets. Had he really just outed Callie as a slut? Talk about your pot calling the kettle black situation. Eli was the biggest man whore in school. He’d no right to throw stones.

Face screwed up with a mixture of embarrassment and hurt, Callie sucked in a deep breath and balled her fists. Within a span of two seconds, the pain twisting her features had turned into anger. She whirled around on her heels without so much as a word and stormed off, but not before beaming me with a look of absolute hatred.

Eli slid in front of me as I tried to leave and placed a hand on my shoulder. “I meant what I said to Callie, Nev. The girl I want has brains, beauty, and she respects herself. She’s also a spitfire and a challenge.” He raised his hand and brushed the back of his knuckle along my cheekbone. “The girl I want, the only girl I want, is you.”

A loud sob wrenched my attention from Eli, and I turned to see Erin standing a good ten feet away amidst the bustling crowd, pain and disbelief etched across her pretty face.

“Erin!” I lunged toward her but didn’t get far.

“Let her go,” he said while tugging on my arm.

Rage swirled up from deep within, and I turned around and slapped him as hard as I could across the face. “No! You need to let
me
go!” I yanked my wrist from his steely grip and backed away. “You and I will never happen,” I said through clenched teeth. “Never! So, stay away from me.” I wheeled around and took off, weaving in and out of the crowd on my way to the warm-up room.

The room was enormous and housed at least a dozen teams, all of which were either tumbling, stunting, or running their routines full out on each of the respective mats. The Diamond Girls were at the back, warming up their standing tumbling, and I rushed over to the thin blue mat, earning a harsh look from Coach Shea for being late.

“I’m sorry,” I mouthed as I slid into the back of the line. Erin stood two people in front of me, and purposely avoided my gaze. Panic erupted and I felt my breathing quicken. Why? Why was this happening now? Of all times for things to blow up.

“Callie!”

I turned my head toward the end of the tumbling mat to see Coach Jordan hovering over a red-faced Callie, who’d attempted her standing tuck and landed on her knees.

“Pull yourself together, Callie. You know how to land a standing tuck now. I’ve seen you do it at practice all week. Try again.”

Looked like Erin and I weren’t the only ones experiencing an emotional crisis. Eli had gotten to Callie, too. Broken through her impenetrable armor and cut her deep.

“Erin,” I said, and stepped out of line. “Can we please talk? What happened back there, it’s not what you think.”

She didn’t flinch, didn’t so much as bat an eye, so I tried again. “Erin! Please. Talk to me.”

A few seconds passed, then, with a deep sigh, she finally met my gaze. I couldn’t stop the small gasp that escaped my lips. The anger and betrayal I expected to see behind her eyes was surprisingly absent. What I got from her was a thousand times worse. Indifference. She met my gaze with cool apathy and uttered five small words that cut me to my core. “Stay away from me, Nev.”

I caught Livvie’s frown as I stepped back into line and shook my head when she mouthed a silent “what’s wrong?” It wouldn’t do me, or the team, any good to spill the beans about what had just happened with Callie, Erin, and Eli. I’d tell her after we competed.

I wasn’t feeling any better when it came time for me to warm-up my pass. The squirrely sensation riddling my chest had grown, not lessened, and my head pounded like someone had taken a mallet to it.

“What are you waiting for, Nev? Go,” Coach Jordan shouted.

With a deep breath and a nod, I darted across the mat, flew into a round off back handspring, and then proceeded to completely botch my Arabian. I stumbled forward out of the trick, ate a hefty amount of mat, and scraped what had to have been the first three layers of skin off a large portion of my stomach. Unfortunately, because we only had a limited amount of time to get through each warm-up mat, I was forced to move on without making another attempt at my pass. I bit my lip as I walked onto the stunting mat, praying to God I didn’t do the same thing on the competition floor.

The rest of warm-ups were a blur, and before I knew it, we were huddled around Coach Shea, moments from taking the mat.

She eyed each of us with a mixture of pride and ferocity. “This is it, girls. The moment you’ve been training for for the past seven months. I know it’s been a rough week for some of you,” her eyes met mine for a split second, then darted away, “but I need you to put all the outside stuff away, and focus on giving one hundred and ten percent to this routine. Flyers, stay tight! Bases, stay under your flyers! And listen up. I don’t care if you rip your pee pees, I want those toe touches up past your ears! Now, who are you?”

The circle erupted in a frenzy of shouts. “Diamond Girls!” Arms linked, shoulder to shoulder, we swayed side-to-side, chanting and shouting. “Stand up and look! We’re where it’s at. Us Diamond Girls, we rock the mat!”

Hand in hand, we lined up behind a gigantic fabric drape the girls all referred to as a car wash because of the narrowly cut strips we emerged from when we burst onto the mat.

The arena roared.