Extreme Honor (14 page)

Inhaling the lavender-scented steam, she started to systematically tense and relax her body a part at a time. First her toes, then her feet, then her calves…and on up. Tension released in areas she hadn't realized had been seized up. It didn't take more than ten minutes, but the relaxation exercise helped immensely, more so in combination with the hot soak. She'd probably still be sore tomorrow but not as bad as she might've been.

Come to think of it, the whole night had turned out better than what could've been.

She'd reached for her car door handle when the other car had almost run down David. Stupid. Even if she'd have managed to get the door open it would've probably been too late to do any good or she might've hit him with it and slowed his escape. She hadn't been thinking so much as horrified. Actually, if she'd opened her door and the car had collided with it, it could've hurt her pretty badly, too.

Swallowing hard, she wrapped her arms around herself.

David had been quick and avoided the danger far better than she could have. And then the drive…

At those speeds, would any of them have walked away from a crash? Atlas hadn't been secured. He'd have bounced around the car like a ping-pong ball. Even with the seat belts, she and David could've been seriously hurt.

Visions of the car running off the road, flipping over and rolling, flashed through her mind. There was a chattering noise and it took her several seconds to identify the sound as her own teeth. The water around her was still warm but she was shaking all over. She'd drawn her knees up without noticing and she sat in a semi-fetal position in the tub trying to hold herself together.

But it was too late. The panic attack was in full swing. More images streamed through her mind of the dark, the bright headlights. The sounds of engines and screeching tires echoed in her ears. Her heart beat harder and she couldn't catch her breath.

Then the sounds changed to words.

…
she won't see our faces.

There was a sharp bark.

“Lyn? You okay in there?”

But we can show her a couple other things before we leave.

She held her breasts, trying to protect them from the painful pinch. Squeezed her eyes shut and tried not to see his face.
No. No. No.

Another bark, deeper, and a scratching sound.

There was a soft creak as the door was opened and Atlas was there, leaning over the tub, licking her face.

“Lyn! I'm coming in.”

She didn't protest, glad for Atlas and relieved as she realized David was there.

David reached in and lifted her out of the tub, cradling her against his chest. “It's okay. You're okay.”

“S-sorry. S-sorry!” She couldn't stop shaking, couldn't stop her teeth from chattering.

“It's okay. We're here.” David carried her out of the dimly lit bathroom into the warm light of the bedroom and set her on the bed.

She wanted to cling to him, ask him not to let her go. But he was back in seconds and wrapped a soft blanket around her.

David sat next to her then, his arm open in invitation. She tipped right into his chest, burying her face in the hollow of his shoulder. He stilled for a minute. “Just this once.
Over
.”

She looked up in time to see Atlas jump onto the bed and give her a quiet, concerned whine. The big dog stared into her eyes for a long moment, then lay down pressed up against her other side. His heavy weight against her hip helped settle her jangling nerves.

“I love baths. I don't know why I'm like this. I hate this.” She was babbling and she had no idea why.

His hands rubbed up and down her upper arms, warming her through the comforter. “Could be a lot of factors. These things sneak up on you.”

He was matter-of-fact about it, accepting. None of it was weird to him. She was so glad he wasn't calling her crazy. She was a little worried that she was, in fact, losing it.

“I don't understand what's wrong with me.”

He kissed her forehead. “None of this is wrong. You've been through awful things. They'll come back and bite you once in a while.”

She considered his words. “You get these…moments. Panic attacks?”

“Yeah. Not often. More nightmares than these, but I've seen it enough.” His voice turned rough. “It's nothing to be ashamed of.”

Leaning into him, she breathed in the scent of him. He smelled like clean air and woods. “How do you make it stop?”

“You don't.” Simple. Matter of fact. Gruff but not callous. “You figure out how to work your way through it each time it happens, but don't try to avoid it and don't convince yourself it won't happen, because that's when it'll catch you with your pants down. Accept it. Work through it.”

It was what he did. She considered his words. Short, to the point. But not without caring. His understanding helped more than lots of talking. He'd gotten through these kinds of things. Nightmares? He woke up every day and walked out into the world and she couldn't ever remember a moment she'd thought he was anything but capable and confident and on top of it all.

He'd shared a weakness with her and somehow, it made her ridiculously relieved to know she wasn't alone.

David's arm had closed around her and he used his free hand to clear strands of wet hair from her face. “Take your time and get your bearings. Look. Listen. Smell. Everything is different. You're safe here. It's all good.”

It was his face she looked at. His chiseled features and dark hair, his steel blue eyes. She etched it into her memory and drove away the other man's disgusting leer with the warmth and concern of David's expression. Here was safety, strength. This was what she wanted to remember.

She leaned up and pressed her lips against his. He held still for a long moment, not pulling away but not reciprocating. Then his lips parted and he returned her kiss gently.

But it wasn't enough.

“More,” she whispered against his lips.

David lifted his head and tucked her against his shoulder again, resting his chin on her head. “You're really upset right now. It'd be better to tuck you in and let you get some rest.”

No. No sleeping. She didn't want nightmares.

“There's too many things crashing inside my head. Too many bad memories.” She needed him to understand. “I'm terrified and I don't want these things to keep ambushing me in the dark.”

His arms tightened around her. “It takes a while to work through these, sometimes a long while. When they happen, you've got to find your way through. Breathe. Look around you.” He paused. “Maybe see a professional to talk through it. You've been through a lot in less than two weeks.”

She shook her head. “A shrink isn't what I need right now.”

“Well, I'm not sure of one who's got office hours at this time of night anyway but soon. Everybody handles these things their own way. You'll find your way.”

She huffed out a laugh. Maybe. Probably. So far, she liked his method of dealing. The panic had receded to a faint jangle in the back of her head and she was grateful. It'd be even better to replace it with something positive.

“To be honest, I want better memories.” She pulled away from him just far enough to look up into his eyes, catch his gaze. It was important for him to know she meant every word she was about to say. “Make love to me? Not because I'm upset. But because you're wonderful and I'm insanely attracted to you. Because I want to make memories with you. Good ones. Can we do that?”

O
h boy, did he want to. Cruz struggled with his raging libido.

“This isn't right, Lyn.” He needed to get off this bed and out of this room. Stat. What she was offering would test the self-control of a saint and he wasn't one. Not even close.

“You've already insisted we do the right thing once.” She reached out of the cocoon of the comforter he'd wrapped around her and snagged a handful of his t-shirt.

He could break away easily, but because it was her holding him, he wouldn't. Did she even know?

“I'm completely awake and in full control of my mental faculties.” Her gaze held his with a steady, smoldering burn.

Every part of him was waking up in response to her. Woman knew what she wanted. “You are extremely upset and vulnerable.”

Part of him wanted to pounce on her, press his lips against every delicate part and run his tongue along her body until he found sensitive places even she didn't know about herself. Curled up as she was, completely naked under that comforter, she was definitely vulnerable.

His damsel in distress narrowed her eyes at him and pressed her lips together. “There's a whole lot of life going on and it doesn't make sense to me to wait for happier times or calmer days.”

She had a point there. She was also shrugging out of the comforter some and the smooth skin across her exposed shoulder was insanely enticing.

“Besides, there's a certain excitement about the last twenty-four hours at least.” Her cheeks warmed to a rose flush. “I've never felt more alive than now.”

He could understand her reaction. Extreme danger, potentially life-threatening. One of the ways people could deal with coming through those kinds of situations intact was to celebrate life. And hell, as far as he was concerned, enjoying it with another person was even better.

Buying himself some time to clear his head, he straightened and looked Atlas in the eye. “Let's get you settled for the night.”

Lyn leveled a smoldering stare on him, letting him know she definitely didn't plan to cool off while he was stepping away, and caressed the big dog's head. “Good night, Atlas.”

Of course she'd sound happy, all sorts of sweet and innocent. None of them was fooled, though. Atlas was probably more than aware of the pheromones floating around the room.

Atlas reluctantly followed him off the bed and out of the bedroom into the sitting room. There was a large crate for guest dogs set up, complete with water and food bowls, freshly laundered blankets.

“
Hok
.” Cruz motioned to the crate.

Atlas studied it, then Cruz, for a long moment before entering. He sniffed around for a few seconds, then lay down with an audible huff.

“Sorry, bud.” Cruz had a small amount of brotherly sympathy for the big dog. Besides, depending on how he answered Lyn, he might end up out here bedding down next to the big dog. “We've both slept in strange places. At least this is comfortable.”

Besides, if circumstances were reversed out in the field, Cruz wouldn't have begrudged Atlas. Well, things were different for dogs.

Moving on.

Lyn was still curled up at the top of the bed with the comforter gathered around her when he returned. He strode across the small room and paused. The lights were all on but in their vintage fixtures, the glow they cast was soft.

“Stay with me, David.” She rose up out of her comforter when he came within reach, pressed a kiss on his jaw.

His control frayed and dissolved. Heat rushed up through his body and up into his head despite the few moments of clarity he'd gained earlier. Nope, he hadn't had a chance.

As her lips found his, he angled his head to give her better access and opened for her. Their tongues danced and explored. He drank in her sweetness, her lips touched with a hint of salt from the bath. He wondered if he'd get the same complex flavors when he ran his tongue over other parts of her.

When, not if.

Oh, he was going to hell.

“Are you sure?” He wanted to give her every opportunity.

Her gaze was steady, though, and her smile was warm, intimate—a visual caress just for him. “What's taking you so long?”

He chuckled. “Oh, you have no idea what you are getting yourself into.”

He climbed onto the high bed and stalked up to her on hands and knees.

“I have high hopes.” She reached out to him, caressing the sides of his face.

Her lips were soft, welcoming. He kept the kisses light for the moment, playful. “Do you want the lights out?”

She froze for a moment and he drew back so he could catch her gaze. Shadows and fear flickered in her eyes.

He made a soft hushing noise. “I like the lights, if they're okay with you. I like seeing you.”

The tension eased throughout her body and he let his weight settle over her as she gave him kisses as her answer. Her body was pliant under his, her curves pressing against him and tempting his control. He'd burned out most of it trying to resist her at all.

He ran a hand along her side, enjoying the silky smoothness of her skin and the curve of her hip under his hand.

She nipped at the corner of his mouth and tugged at his t-shirt. “No fair.”

He sat up long enough to pull the t-shirt over his head, enjoying her touch as she sat up with him to run her hands over his chest. “I haven't had a chance to shower yet. I could—”

She shook her head, tugging at his belt. “Uh-uh, I've waited long enough.”

Okay then. He helped her with undoing his pants and both of them chuckled as he got out of them without leaving the bed, mostly because she wouldn't let him. Once he was naked, she ran her hands over him, hungry and greedy in the best of ways.

This was another aspect of Lyn he enjoyed, the way she met him in every activity. She didn't just sit back and let him do all the work or always take the lead. She met him head on.

As her fingers wrapped around the length of him, he shuddered. “Careful.”

“I'm done being careful.”

The heat of her mouth closed over him and he almost lost his balance, his control, and everything right then and there.

He buried his hand in her gold hair. God, she was doing things to him and he'd have all sorts of catching up to do. And he would.

She sucked and licked the head of his shaft as her fingertips teased the tender skin under his balls. He groaned under the onslaught of sensations, almost blinded by how good it felt. He gritted his teeth and reached for whatever willpower he had left not to thrust or rush her in any way.

A moment later, she released him, looking up the length of him with wet lips and a very saucy expression. Growling, he pushed her back on the bed. He settled himself between her legs and ground his hips into her, rubbing his erection along her slit. She was already wet, ready for him.

“There's so much I want to do for you,” he groaned. Then he kissed her neck, tasted the slight salt left behind by her bath mixed with the natural sweetness of her skin. “But I want to be inside you now. Right now.”

“Please.” Her whisper tickled his ear and her hands gripped at his hips.

He drew back and reached to one side, pulling open the drawer of the nightstand and fishing out a condom from the box thoughtfully hidden there. It'd been Kathryn, not Thomas, who'd pulled David aside before settling them into the room to tell David she kept the master suite well stocked with amenities for all sorts of needs. He sent the saucy old proprietress silent thanks.

After unwrapping the condom and rolling it on, he was back to Lyn as fast as he could be. He nuzzled her breasts until she giggled, her arms wrapping around his shoulders. Capturing one taut nipple in his mouth, he suckled until her breath caught.

“Tease.” Her voice was husky now with a tinge of impatience.

Good. That made two of them. He took one of her hands and guided it south, placing her hand on his rigid shaft and letting her guide him in. He watched her, kept her gaze locked with his. Any moment, any fear, any doubt, and he'd stop. But he didn't want to miss this. Wanted to enjoy every bit of it with her.

As she positioned him at her opening, he pressed inside her, hot and slick. Tight. Her eyes fluttered shut and her neck arched as he filled her. He fisted the comforter on either side of her as he pulled back out and slid in, rocking against her in a slow rhythm.

Her breath changed to heavier panting and he drank in the sight of her gorgeous breasts rising and falling as he continued to move inside her. She groaned and grasped his forearms, trying to angle her pelvis for even better penetration.

He bent his head low to catch her mouth for a hot kiss. “More?”

“Oh, yes.” Her face was flushed and her hair spread out all across the bed under her. She was beautiful.

And he planned to give her everything she wanted.

He coaxed one of her knees higher against his side, then hooked his arm underneath. The new position allowed him to go deeper. She called out brokenly and her inner muscles convulsed around him.

She was close. He was closer. And damn it, he was going to hold on until she got there.

He dragged in breath after breath, slowing his pace and savoring every slide in and out of her. She clutched at his shoulders then shifted her grip to his hips, urging him deeper and faster. Every time he rocked into her, she made fantastic sounds of pleasure. Her breasts bounced beneath him and he couldn't deny her what she wanted.

Increasing his rhythm, he drew out and plunged back into her faster.

“David! Yes! Harder!”

Yes. Pleasure gathered low and tight, his balls even tightened, until every other thought left his brain and his focus was only on the feel of being inside Lyn.

Her thighs tightened and her hips thrust upward as she gasped, then she came apart beneath him. He pulled out and slid himself back in tortuously slow as her inner muscles convulsed around him and she came, hard.

They held on to each other in the aftermath, both breathing hard. Every few moments one or the other of them twitched, sending a cascade of sensations through both of them. Hypersensitive, it was agony to leave her and clean up in the bathroom. But when he came back, she'd moved over on the bed and pulled down the sheets to tuck them both in.

He climbed into the bed next to her and tucked her up against his side. “Is it okay with you if we wake up early tomorrow?”

She snuggled into his shoulder. “Mmm. Sure.”

There was a beat of silence as he pondered turning off the lights in the room. It wouldn't hurt to leave them on, for tonight at least. Given time, she'd work through her triggers.

“Fair warning,” Lyn whispered, her lips brushing his lower jaw. “I'm very partial to morning ambushes so we might be waking up a little earlier than you planned.”

His lips stretched into a real smile. “Yes, ma'am.”