Falcorans' Faith (25 page)

Bubbles turned her enormous head to look at Faith.  “It’s all right, Bubbles,” Faith said calmly, keeping her gaze on the
raktsasa’s
familiar eyes and not the long, sharp fangs that filled her mouth.  “I’m safe.  It was a mistake.  Come on, back to my shoulder.”

Sensing Faith’s concern for her, and her current lack of fear, Bubbles immediately shrank back to her usual size, a two inch wide by seven inch long strip of red fur lying on the floor of the elevator.  She scrunched herself up, shot up to Faith’s shoulder from the floor like a spring, then wrapped herself around Faith’s neck and began to purr.

“I’m sorry,” Faith said to the men still standing in the hall.  Men who, she suddenly realized, looked a lot like the Falcorans.  “I was distressed about something and she misinterpreted my feelings.  It was careless of me.”

“Please do not give it another thought,” one of the men said, taking a small step forward and bowing.  “It is a
raktsasa’s
purpose to protect her bonder.  She did a good job.  You should be proud of her.”

“Thank you,” Faith said, glad that they weren’t angry.  “I appreciate your understanding, and I’ll be more careful in future.”

“We, too, appreciate your understanding, nephews,” Tristan said as he, Gray and Jon suddenly appeared in front of the elevator, their bodies between her and the other three men. 

“Please, think nothing of it, Admirals,” the man replied.  “If you will excuse us, we will take another elevator.”  He bowed once more, then walked away, his brothers following him.  Once they were gone, Tristan, Gray and Jon turned to face Faith. 

“Are you all right?” Tristan asked, his eyes scanning her face carefully.

“No, I don’t think so,” Faith said, suddenly realizing that she was trembling all over.  She stared up into Tristan’s eyes, fighting the overwhelming urge to fling herself into his arms.  When he slowly raised his arms and spread them in silent invitation, sensing her need, she lost the battle.

Tristan gasped in surprise as Faith slammed into him, her arms going around his waist.  He knew she wanted to, knew that she needed someone to hold her in this moment, but he had not believed that she would trust him, trust
them
, enough to actually give in to her need. 

She felt so small and fragile against him, her body trembling so hard he worried she’d hurt herself.  He slowly settled his arms around her shoulders, not wanting to startle her by moving too fast.  Gray and Jon moved closer so that the three of them surrounded Faith without quite touching her.  They waited patiently as she shook and trembled against Tristan.  It took far less time than they’d expected for her to calm herself.   When her breathing returned to normal, she dropped her arms and took a step back.

“I’m sorry,” she said, her eyes on the floor so that she didn’t see Tristan shake his head.  “I nearly got those men hurt because of my own carelessness.  Poor Bubbles.”  She reached up to stroke the
raktsasa
with a shaky hand.

“Bubbles would not have harmed them unless they’d threatened you, Faith,” Tristan said as he reached out with Water magic to soothe Bubbles, who was still fretful.  “Besides, our nephews are Clan Jasani.  They would not have been seriously harmed even had Bubbles attacked them.  What’s important is that you stopped her, Faith.  You did exactly as you should have, and no harm was done.”

Faith sighed and hung her head, not quite believing the incident was as minor as Tristan made it sound. 

“Would you like to return to your room now?” Gray asked.

“Yes, for a few minutes,” she said without looking up.  “Then I’ll come back to work.”

“If you need a longer break, take one,” Tristan said, but Faith shook her head. 

“No, I’ll be fine,” she insisted.  “I just need a few minutes.”

Tristan stepped the rest of the way into the elevator and pressed a button.  When the doors opened a few seconds later, they escorted Faith up the hall to her room.

“We will wait for you here,” Tristan said.  Faith only nodded, then closed the door.  Tristan stood motionless, absorbing the unfamiliar sensation of warmth that lingered on his body where Faith had touched him, and the sweet scent of orange blossoms. 

“She is very hard on herself,” Gray said quietly.  “No harm was done, yet she feels as though she did something wrong.”

“I think the real problem is whatever sent her running in the first place,” Jon said.

“I no longer care what we have to do to earn her trust,” Tristan said.  “We cannot help her without knowing what the problem is.”

“I am certainly in agreement with that,” Jon said, not quite daring to believe that Tristan had changed his mind about claiming her as their Arima.  He wanted to help her.  That was enough for now. 

“I know this is probably wrong, but I would like to use Water to soothe her as you did Bubbles,” Gray said.  

“No,” Jon barked sharply.  “I apologize,” he added when his brothers stared at him in surprise.  “I am becoming very concerned that Faith was...violated...in some way.”  He paused, swallowed hard against the rage that threatened at the thought.  “If I am correct, any action that manipulates her in any way is going to be seen as a violation by her.”

“What about helping her to sleep past her nightmares?” Gray said.  “Are you suggesting we stop doing that as well?  Because I do not believe I can stand to listen to her screams and do nothing about them.”

“I think it would be best to tell her what we’ve been doing,” Jon said reluctantly. 

“I don’t want to do that,” Gray said.  “There’s too much of a chance she’ll tell us not to do it anymore.”

“I don’t want to do it either,” Jon agreed.  “But we must.”

“I agree with you, Jon,” Tristan said.  “I too am beginning to sense that she was violated, and I am concerned what our reaction will be when, if, she tells us about it.”

Jon and Gray had nothing to say to that since they shared the same concern.  A few minutes later Faith’s door opened and they turned to face her.  She’d washed her face and brushed her hair.  She looked refreshed, but still too pale and nervous. 

“Faith,” Tristan said.  “as we told you, we have some strength in Water magic.  We can soothe your nerves, if you like.  It will not make you feel drugged or sleepy or forgetful.  We would only clean up some of the residual adrenaline in your bloodstream, and help you to relax.”

Faith hesitated.  But she knew that she wouldn’t be able to concentrate feeling as edgy as she did, and she had responsibilities.  The Jasani were counting on her, and she didn’t want to let anyone down.  “All right,” she said.  “I don’t have to lie down or anything, do I?”

“No,” Tristan said.  “Just stand there for one moment, and try to relax.”

Faith tried to do as Tristan asked, watching as the Falcorans closed their eyes for a few moments.  Suddenly she felt better.  Her trembling stopped, her stomach stopped hurting, and she felt as though her heart rate had returned to normal.  The tight feeling in her back and neck eased, and she felt like she could take a deep breath again.

They opened their eyes, relieved to see her smiling.  “That was amazing.”

“We are glad to be of help,” Tristan said.  Faith pulled her door shut and turned toward the elevator, the Falcorans once again falling into step with her  “I believe that it was something I said that upset you to begin with.  For that, I apologize.”

Faith shook her head, but didn’t meet Tristan’s eyes.  “It was nothing,” she said.  “Certain words tend to bring back unpleasant memories.  It’s not your fault.”

“Yes, we can certainly understand that,” Tristan said.  “Faith, I would ask you for a favor.”

“Okay,” Faith said.  After what they’d just done for her, she was willing to at least hear what they wanted.

“About two years ago something happened to us that changed us, and not in a good way,” Tristan said.  “We have decided that we would like to share our story with you, if you agree.”

“May I ask why you want to share your story with me?” she asked, not liking the suspicion that rose in her, but unable to prevent it. 

“We have been told, repeatedly, that our wounds would never heal until we trusted someone enough to tell them all that had happened,” Tristan said. 

“Yeah, I’m familiar with that concept,” Faith said dryly. 

“Does it work?” Tristan asked, the hope in his voice unfeigned.

“I don’t know,” she replied, with a half-hearted shrug.  “I suppose it does, to some extent.”

“We would like to try,” Tristan said.  “What happened to us is not a secret since many Clan Jasani were present at the time.  But we have never told the whole story to anyone.  We do not even discuss it among ourselves.”

Faith hesitated.  She wasn’t ready to trade stories with them, but they hadn’t asked for that.  They’d only asked her to listen.

“Yes, I’ll listen,” she said.  “When do you want to do this?”

“Thank you,” Tristan said with obvious relief.  For a moment there he’d been certain she would refuse.  “Would this evening, after dinner, be acceptable to you?”

“Sure, that’s fine,” Faith replied.

“I think it would be easier for all of us if you read a bit more of the book on the hand terminal, if you don’t mind,” Tristan said.  “It will give you a better understanding of us, and our background.”

“Nope, don’t mind at all,” Faith said.  “I read some last night before bed.  It was very interesting.”

“How far did you get?” Tristan asked.

“To the part where the first human women were brought to Jasan,” she said.  “I was very sad to read how your home world was destroyed.  I brought the hand terminal with me so I can read some more in between jump point checks.”

“Excellent,” Tristan said.  They had reached the Observation Deck and he opened the door for her.  She stepped inside, her eyes going to the viewport. 

“What will the Xanti say about all that debris?  Will they think that we blew up their ship?”

“We hope not,” Tristan said as he guided her to a chair they’d placed near the viewport.  There was a small table beside it so she could eat or read if she liked.  “The Shearans sent a frantic message to the Xanti demanding to know why two of their ships entered their space without requesting permission, attacked their guests without provocation, then disintegrated in their space without even being fired upon.  They’re claiming that it was highly embarrassing to them to have this occur in the middle of trade negotiations, and that we Jasani are threatening to leave because of it.”

“Clever,” Faith said.

“While we’re waiting for the rest of the task force to finish their jumps, we’ll check out the five anomalies the Shearans found for us,” Tristan said.

“Sounds good,” Faith replied.  She removed the hand terminal from her pocket and powered it up just as one of the boys from the cafeteria came in with her mid morning meal.  She ate while she read, putting Bubbles’ meal on the floor for her.  By the time they were finished, the
Eyrie
was approaching the first anomaly that the Shearans had found.

She stood up and walked toward the viewport as she studied the now familiar sight.  “This is a Door, like the one by the Jasani Skyport,” she said after a moment.  “The size looks the same, and it’s edges are straight and even.  It’s closed right now.” 

“That’s exactly what the sensors are telling us,” Tristan said.  She smiled, glad that they were developing a way of finding these things without her.  She turned and crossed to where Jon waited beside the big binoculars still set up on a tripod.  A few minutes later they had the exact location and dimensions of the Door, and moved on to the next anomaly, which was another closed Door. 

The two areas the Shearans had been uncertain of were thin spots with ragged edges.  Faith wondered if they would one day become jump points, but there was no way to know that for sure.  They marked them both, then moved on.  They’d saved the potential jump point for last since it was an hour away.  They went to the cafeteria for a late lunch while waiting, and returned to the Observation Deck just as the
Eyrie
reached it.

“Tristan,” Gray said as he sat down at his vid terminal.  “Captain Rolin reports that sensors have located a potential jump-point that the Shearans missed, not far from this one.”

“Very good,” Tristan said.  “We’ll check it next.”

Faith stood by the viewport, watching as the ship adjusted it’s angle so that  the area that the Shearans had found was directly in front of her.  It was definitely a jump point, ragged edges and all, and as big as the others they’d found.  She looked into it, but saw nothing on the other side but empty space.  Not a star, not a moon, not a planet.  A creeping sensation trickled down the back of her scalp, making her shiver.

“It’s definitely a jump point,” she said.  “But I don’t think it would be a good idea for anyone to enter it.”

“Why not?” Gray asked.

“It goes...nowhere,” Faith said, then shook her head.  “No, that’s not what I mean.  It goes
somewhere
.  Somewhere that’s completely dark.  All I can see is total blackness.  Just thinking about going there makes me feel...sick.  And scared.”

“Let’s see if a different angle will change things,” Tristan said.  He spoke into his vox and the ship moved.  Faith shook her head and the ship moved again.  Fifteen minutes later they’d tried every possible angle, but Faith never saw a single thing.