Fall Into Me (Heart of Stone) (23 page)

"When
Taylor was twenty-four, he got a teenage girl pregnant. She was only fifteen.
Her name was Amanda. I don't know why, but he abandoned her and the baby she
was carrying. He wouldn't take her calls or see her, so she became depressed
and when she was three months pregnant, killed herself."

"Oh,
my God...I'm so sorry."

Nina's
sympathy only made this worse. Shaking my head, I continued on. "The
girl's father was a judge who my father's company ended up in front of for a
sexual harassment case. It was a common civil suit that Stone Worldwide gets at
least half a dozen times each year, but this one wasn't going to be one my
father could win because the judge knew what Taylor had done. So my father had
him murdered to be sure he'd win the case."

Suddenly,
Nina's eyes narrowed to slits and she sat back with a heavy sigh. "Why
does this sound so familiar? I swear I've heard something like this
before."

My
heart began pounding in my chest at the real fear that she was finally
remembering. I wanted to stop, to push it all out of my mind and take her in my
arms and never let her go. But I couldn't.

Now
I had to say the hardest part. "No one would have ever known about all
this if an investigative reporter hadn't begun checking into something about my
father's company. I imagine he probably thought he was onto some real estate
scheme or something like that, but he somehow found out about Taylor and Amanda
Cashen, and from there it just snowballed until he had uncovered everything my
father had done, including the murder of her father."

"Who
was the reporter, Tristan?"

I
stopped pacing and looked down into her face. "I never knew what my father
and brother were doing. I had no idea, Nina."

"What
was his name?" she said again, louder.

"I
didn't know, Nina. I need you to believe that."

Her
eyes grew wide, and she covered her mouth with her hands. Behind them, she said
with a sob, "Oh my, God! I remember. I remember everything. You knew when
you met me. You knew who I was and didn't tell me until that night."

I
fell to my knees in front of her and stared up into all that pain. It tore my
heart out. "Nina, I'm not asking for forgiveness. I know what I did was
wrong. I didn't know what to do. If I told you when we met, you wouldn't have
come to live with me. Karl and his friends were sure you knew about what your
father had uncovered. I couldn't let them hurt you. I wanted to stop the cycle
of pain that my father had begun."

"So
you lied to me from the minute you met me? I fell in love with you!"

"I
fell in love with you. That's the only part that wasn't built on a lie. I love
you. I never meant to hurt you."

"This
is why you've been avoiding me? You didn't want to face me with the
truth," she cried as she recoiled from my touch.

"I'm
sorry, Nina. Karl was threatening you, telling me that if you knew anything of
what your father had found out that he'd kill you to keep you quiet. I didn't
know about any of what Taylor and my father had done to the Cashens until I met
with Judge Cashen's daughter in Atlanta. Until then..."

She
cut me off as she jumped off the couch to get away from me. "Until then,
all you knew was that your father had my father murdered execution style in a
parking garage in Newark and you weren't going to tell me."

I
slumped against the arm of the couch and hung my head. "I didn't know how
to tell you without losing you. I couldn't lose you."

"So
you lied to me every day and night."

"I
convinced myself that it was okay because I was protecting you. I thought if I
could make sure you were safe that someday you'd understand."

"I
found out that night when I got into the accident. When were you going to tell
me this time?"

I
didn't know how to answer that. I'd never gotten that far. I'd been so
concerned that Karl would hurt her that telling her the truth had been pushed
aside.

"When,
Tristan? When?" she screamed.

"I
don't know."

"Look
at me! At least face me now."

I
turned around and looked up at her. "I'm sorry. I thought if I just had
enough time I could solve this whole thing and you'd never have to know what my
father did. I swear I didn't know about anything he did until right before I
met you."

"You
aren't to blame for what happened to my father, Tristan. Your crime was lying
to me. We built a life together based on a lie. You asked me to marry you. Our
entire life is a lie."

Standing,
I grabbed her hands, needing to feel her touch on my skin, some small
connection I could believe still meant something. "Don't say that. I know
I lied and I know I hurt you, but we love each other. No matter what else
happened, we fell in love."

"How
could you do this? I wanted to believe we'd be together forever," she said
in a sad voice as she looked down at our joined hands.

"I'm
sorry, Nina. No matter what else, I need you to believe that I love you."

She
yanked her hands from mine and glared up at me. Shaking her head wildly, she
sobbed, "I can't listen to this. I can't. I trusted you."

Dropping
to my knees, I wrapped my arms around her legs and held her tight. I needed to
keep her there. I couldn't let her go. "Come away with me. We can go
anywhere. Venice again. Wherever you want. As long as we're together."

Nina
stared down into my eyes and I knew. I'd lost her. No amount of begging was
going to work.

"I
can't do this, Tristan. I can't," she said sadly and then pulled away from
me, never looking back.

I
watched her run out, knowing that I had to go after her. My feet took the steps
downstairs by two, and I caught up with her just as she was reaching the
street. Jensen stood next to the car looking over at me for what to do.

"Take
me home!" she ordered as she opened the car door, but he stood still as a
statue waiting for my orders.

"I
want to go home! Take me home, Jensen!" she cried, but still he wouldn't
move, his eyes focused on me to know what to do.

Silently,
I nodded to let him know he could leave, and he sped away toward the house as I
watched everything I loved leave me. I'd told myself over and over that I was
willing to lose her if it meant she was safe, but now I couldn't do it. I
couldn't let her go. I needed to know she believed I loved her.

I
heard her cry as I stood in the hallway outside her bedroom door, knowing I was
the only person who couldn't make her feel better. For an hour, I listened to
her heartbreaking sobs as my hope that she'd understand why I'd done what I'd
done faded away.

Sliding
down the wall, I finally leaned against her door and whispered, "I can't
do this anymore. I'm sorry. I never meant to hurt you."

I'd
lost her. The one soul on Earth that I truly loved and I'd lost her because of
who I was. That was the truth at the heart of it all. I was a Stone and because
of that—because of what I was deep down—I'd lost Nina's love.

I
was no different than my father or Taylor.

Closing
my eyes, I pressed my cheek to her door and whispered one last time, "I
love you, Nina. I hope someday you can forgive me."

I
waited for what seemed like hours for her to say anything, but all I heard was
silence.

Chapter Twenty-Three

Nina

My
throat hurt because I cried so much, but the tears kept coming. I didn't know
which hurt more—knowing what really happened to my father and that Tristan's
father had been the one to take him away from me or that everything I loved had
been based on a lie. I wanted to run away, like I did before, but I couldn't.
Tristan had lied to me from the moment he met me, but I loved him. And he loved
me. I just didn't know how we'd go on from here.

I'd
heard him outside my door telling me he loved me. His voice was so sad that I
couldn't face him. I pressed my ear to the door and heard him whisper that he
hoped I'd forgive him.

I
knew I shouldn't want to forgive him. He'd lied over and over for months. That
should have been enough for me to never want to speak to him again.

If
only it was that easy.

Exhausted
from crying and thinking for hours, I finally fell asleep just as the first rays
of the sun began to stream through my window. Not that I slept well. My body
may have wanted to rest, but my mind raced the entire time so that when I opened
my eyes at ten I was up and ready to face Tristan and our life together.

I
couldn't just let this go. That had been the one thought preoccupying my mind.
No matter how many times I told myself I couldn't forgive, it's the only thing
I wanted to do. I knew what everyone would say. Kim would tell me I was stupid
or being a fool. Once a liar, always a liar. Even Jordan would likely tell me
to walk away.

My
mind knew that was the smartest thing to do. My heart had an entirely different
agenda, though.

For
better or worse, my heart had won the tug-of-war, and I got out of bed prepared
to tell Tristan how I felt. I could forgive him, but this would be his only
chance. The man who'd been there for me when I was broken and hurt deserved at
least that.

I
spied an envelope sitting on the floor near the door, which was so typical of
him. I hurriedly walked over to get it, noticing as I picked it up that it was
far thicker than his usual notes. A tiny spike of fear ran through my mind at
the possibility of what I'd soon find in those pages. Unfolding them, I began
to read his words. As they flowed in front of my eyes, my stomach dropped and
an emptiness filled me.

Dear
Nina,

I
can't say I'm sorry anymore and convince you how much I never meant to hurt
you. I was a fool to believe that we could be happy. How could we be when I'm
who I am?

You
made my days happier than you'll ever know. Before I met you, I had never loved
anyone. My life was empty. That was my fate, and I accepted it. I was a Stone,
and it was better for me to be alone than to hurt people like my father had.

Then I
met you and all that changed. I didn't want to accept my loneliness anymore. I
wanted to believe I could make someone happy. I tried, but what I had to give
wasn't enough. Money, trips, clothes—none of it made you love me. I didn't know
anything else, and for that I'm sorry.

But
somehow you made me understand none of that mattered and if I gave my heart I
had a chance to have someone like you love me. I gave you my heart, and you
gave me love. I know it wasn't easy to be with me. I'm all closed off and I
need to have control more than other men. I don't know why I'm so fucked up,
but you freely gave me your heart, and your love was the best thing of my life.

I'm
sorry I didn't tell you the truth in the beginning. I'm sorry that when I had
the chance to make things right when you came home from the hospital that I
didn't. I know you may not believe it, but I never wanted to hurt you. That was
the last thing I wanted to do.

I will
always love you. I can't fix the mistakes I've made. I can only say I'm sorry
and hope you'll forgive me someday. You can't accept my love after what I've
done, but I hope you'll accept what I promised. Enclosed you'll find a legal
document that will ensure you'll want for nothing. This house will be
transferred to you, and I've made sure that each month money will be deposited
in your account to ensure you have everything you can possibly desire.

I'm
sorry that all I am is money and things. For a short time, I was more because
of you.

I love
you, Nina. Someday, I hope you'll believe me.

                                                                 Yours
always,

                                                                 Tristan

Tears
clouded my eyes so I couldn't read the words anymore, but I'd seen enough. I
didn't need to read some legal document to know Tristan was gone. Instantly, I
felt alone. I couldn't let him give up on us like this.

I
tore down my hallway screaming his name, but I instinctively felt the emptiness
of the house now that he'd left. I ran from room to room but found nothing.

"Tristan!
No! Tristan!"

All
there was in return was silence.

His
room looked like it always had, like he hadn't even been there that night.
Something in me said to check Rogers' room, and I raced there, stopping dead in
the doorway at the sight of the bed. Neatly made the last time I'd been there,
now the bedspread and blankets lay crumpled as if someone had spent a restless
night there.

I
checked the garage to see if Tristan's Jag was still there, but I knew better.
He was gone. Jensen stood in the corner ready to take me wherever I desired.

"Where
is he?"

"Miss?"

"Where
is Tristan, Jensen? Where did he go?"

"He
drove on his own, miss."

"Do
you know where?"

Jensen
stood silent as he stared at me. Tristan had likely told him not to tell me
where he'd gone. I didn't care. I needed to find him and let him know I forgave
him, even if I didn't understand everything that had happened. I needed to tell
him I still loved him.

"I
have to find him. Tell me where he went!" I yelled across the garage,
shocking the driver.

"He's
gone, Nina," a voice behind me said quietly, and I turned around to see a
strange man standing there.

"Who
are you? Where is Tristan? Tell me! I need to know."

"Come
with me. We can talk inside."

I
followed the large man with too much red hair and beard to a sitting room. As I
took a seat on the couch, I remembered being in that room with Tristan. We'd
first kissed right there after he'd taught me how to tie a Windsor knot. I
remembered everything. Our first night together. How crazy I was in love with
him just days later. Everything was back now.

"My
name is Daryl Knight. I work for Tristan. I guess ordinarily Rogers would have
had the job of telling you this, but it's fallen on me now."

"I
hope you don't hate me like Rogers did because I need you to tell me where
Tristan is. I have to see him."

"That
can't happen, Nina. All I know is that he's gone. Karl and his friends on the
Board want him dead now that your sister gave them her copies of your father's
notes. Because Tristan wouldn't give them the original notes, they can't let
him stay alive."

"I
don't understand. What's so important about my father's notes? Tristan knows
what happened with his father and brother. He knows what they did and why my
father was murdered. Why doesn't he just give them to Karl and be done with
this whole horrible thing?"

"I
don't know why. All I know is that he's not done with those notes yet."

"Well,
I don't care about that. I just need to see him. Where is he, Daryl?"

He
frowned and shook his head. "I don't know. All I know is what he told me
when he called. He wanted me to make sure you read the papers he left
you."

I
angrily waved the envelope Tristan had left me in front of him. "I don't
care about the papers. I want Tristan, not things. Please tell me where he is."

"I
can't."

Out
of the corner of my eye, I saw two huge men who seemed to be hovering just
outside the door to the sitting room. Pointing at them, I asked, "Then can
they tell me?"

Daryl
turned to look at the them and shook his head. "No. They're not here for
that."

"Then
what the hell are they here for? Who are they?"

He
waved them into the room and they took their place in front of us like two
giants eying their next victims. The one who stood on the left had very short,
cropped dark hair with some streaks of grey, and his face said he was all
business. He was enormous, like a bouncer at a club, and he looked as if he
could pick me up with two fingers. The man on the right wore his lighter brown
hair slightly longer and had no grey in his, but his eyes were the darkest blue
I'd ever seen.

"Nina,
these men protect you. They've protected you since your accident. When you
leave this house, they're always nearby making sure you're safe."

"Do
you mean every time I went out they were there?" I asked in astonishment.

I
looked at the men as they nodded silently. My bodyguards looked down at me as I
worked to process all of this. Two men had been watching me and obviously
Tristan had hired them.

"Yes,
and they'll be there every time you go out from now on."

"What
if I don't want them to be?" I asked, feeling slightly irritated by Daryl's
officious tone. It was one thing for Tristan to be all Alpha with me. I loved
him. Daryl was just some scruffy guy sitting in what was now my house and
bossing me around.

"I'm
sorry, but you don't have a choice. They have their job, just as I have mine.
Your safety is paramount to Tristan, so you'll just have to get used to having
them around."

"I
don't understand, Daryl. I thought that Karl and his thugs didn't care about me
anymore because my sister gave them what they wanted. Why would I be in
danger?"

"If
Karl doesn't get what he wants from Tristan, he's not above hurting you. These
men will make sure that doesn't happen."

"What?
For the rest of my life?"

"I
don't know the answer to that. For now, they'll be next to you at all
times."

I
looked up again at the men. "Since you're going to be my shadows, I should
at least know your names."

Mr.
All Business nodded. "Nathan West."

The
corners of Blue Eye's mouth hitched up slightly, giving him a sort of
scary-sexy look. "Gage Varo."

Both
men had hollow, deep voices, adding to my anxiety about all of this. Turning to
face Daryl, I asked, "How do they know when I'm leaving the house? Does
Jensen call them?"

"They
stay in the carriage house. When Jensen leaves, they leave."

I
sat stunned at what Daryl was saying. These men lived on the same property as I
did and I'd never even seen them. And they'd been following me for weeks. How
is it I'd missed these two gigantic men near me at all times?

"Why
haven't I noticed them all this time?"

The
one named Varo answered, "Because you weren't looking for us. Our job is to
be invisible. You would have never known we were there if you hadn't been
told."

"What
if I don't want to live here with bodyguards and a driver?"

Daryl
seemed to think about my question and answered, "I think that would make
Tristan unhappy. He wants to ensure you're safe, Nina."

"I
want to talk to him. I'm tired of all this. Where is he?"

Instead
of giving me the answer I so desperately wanted, Daryl simply stood to leave.
"I can't help you with that. What I can say is that Tristan has taken care
of everything to make sure you're safe."

Jumping
up, I screamed, "Why do you keep saying that? I don't care about being
safe. All I want is to see Tristan!"

"I'm
sorry, Nina. I wish I could say more."

"Then
there is more to say. Where is he? Why can't I at least see him?"

My
bodyguards walked out, leaving me alone with Daryl. He smiled for the first
time and said, "Nina, I can't say more because Tristan hasn't told me
more. I don't know where he is. All I know is that in the middle of the night
he called me and told me he needed my help to make sure what he wanted to
happen happened. That's it."

"Did
he sound..." I didn't know how to say it. "Did he sound like he was
okay? There was coke and..."

Daryl
smiled again. "He sounded tired."

"Would
you tell me if you knew anything else, like say, if he said anything about me
other than that he wanted to know that I'm safe? Give me something."

"I
work for Tristan, but I know how much you mean to him, so yes, I would. He said
very little, Nina. All I know is that his first concern was for your
safety."

I
hung my head in sadness. "Thank you, Daryl. Did he say anything else at
about anything I should do?"

"One
last thing. Don't try to contact your sister. She and her family are safe from
Karl and his friends, but to make sure they stay that way, you can't speak to
her for a while."

"Did
Tristan do that?"

Daryl
nodded. "Yeah. They weren't safe, even after she gave Karl your father's
notes."

"When
is all this going to end, Daryl?"

Shaking
his head, he shrugged. "I don't know, but trust that Tristan won't let
Karl and his buddies get what they want."

I
wish I knew what that awful man wanted. So much of this was still a mystery to
me, and with Tristan gone, I didn't have anyone to help me understand all of
it.

Daryl
handed me a slip of paper. "This is my number. Call me if you need
anything. West and Varo will take care of your safety, and Jensen is here for
you like he's always been."

Nodding,
I pressed a fake smile on my face. "Thank you, Daryl."