Fallen (2 page)

She pushes me away, like I’m foolish to even consider it. “You can’t get out with just a swipe card, Lirium.”

I cringe. I need to play this cool. My hand slides across the soft silk of her pajamas to bring her, gently, back into my arms. “Did you hear what happened?”

“About you being an idiot with Kolek?” She frowns. “I thought you were getting smarter, baby. Working up to minnow.”

I run a finger along the midnight-black hair framing her face. “Kolek has my file. Valac had it all along. He must have gotten it from Candy.
She’s
the one who sold us out.”

I expect her to be shocked. She’s not.

I draw back, the cozy space between us disappearing. “You knew.”

She tilts her head to one side, resigned. “I didn’t know. But I heavily suspected.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Because it didn’t matter!” Her eyes flash, but then she clenches them shut, leans her head back against the door, and bangs it twice, lightly. “I’m sorry I got you in this mess. I should never have gone to your—”

She stops herself and holds perfectly still.

“What?” I ask, instantly suspicious.

She opens her eyes, but looks away. “I wish I hadn’t gone to your apartment that night. You would never have gotten wrapped up in all this.”

My suspicion hardens into a knot of dread in my stomach. “What aren’t you telling me?”

Ophelia shrugs her arms up, folding them across her chest. She’s still only a couple of inches away, but she’s retreating inside herself, putting a barrier between us.

“Ophelia,” I say low and quiet. “Tell me.”

She draws in a breath and lets it out slow. “I knew something was up with Candy. I’d been doing medical transfers, hanging out in the hospital a lot. Too much. Enough to see some things that I shouldn’t have seen.”

“Like what?”

“Like debt collectors coming to the pediatric ward when there shouldn’t be any. Like nurses who talk to debt collectors instead of running the other direction or avoiding us whenever possible.”

“You saw the kids they were transferring out?” My mouth hangs open now. I should have realized Ophelia would know about the illegal life energy transfers from the kids—she used to mentor Valac, and he used to work for Madam A. But that she saw it happen… “And you think Candy was somehow involved? I know she’s at the very low end of the sleaze range, but…”

“She had to be involved,” Ophelia says. “The debt collectors I saw—they all belonged to Candy. And they were definitely in the wrong ward, doing things they shouldn’t be doing. When I asked her if they were still on her list, still in the Agency, she looked funny at me and started purring on about how wonderful it was to have collectors like me. Collectors she didn’t have to worry about washing out or ending up dead.”

“So… she was trying to kiss up to you? To keep you from telling anyone at the Agency?”

Ophelia peers at me. “Who would I tell? For all I know, her dirty business goes straight up the chain at the Agency. And besides, when have you ever had Candy praise you without needing a shower to get the slime off afterwards?” She shudders and clutches her arms tighter across her chest. “It was a warning. To stay out of it. Then she bumped me up to ER medical transfers in another hospital on the tail end of the east side. About as far from that peds ward as she could send me and still have me in her district. Whatever I saw, I was supposed to just forget. And I was happy to forget. I don’t want to know all the dirty business Candy has her red claws dipped into. But I should have known she wouldn’t leave it at that.”

“So she sold you out to Kolek to get rid of you.” My fist presses against the door. Selling us out to the mob is bad enough, but doing it to cover up illegal transfers from kids… my stomach is a hard rock of hate. If I ever get out, Candy’s going to get a very special visit from me.

Ophelia shakes her head. “I knew she might try something. I’ve seen Candy send perfectly sane debt collectors to The Retirement Home. And there have been others who have simply disappeared, supposedly captured by the mob. I didn’t ask why. Those aren’t the kind of things you can look at too closely without getting burned yourself. But I should have known. I should have requested a transfer to another city and gotten out of Candy’s reach. But when she sent me to you…”

I frown. “You thought you were getting a second chance.”

She nods. “I never thought she would sell
you
out, baby. You were just getting started. She couldn’t have had anything against you.”

“I was washing out,” I say, and strangely, that time feels a million miles away. Like whatever cracked loose inside me last night, when I refused to transfer out that boy, moved me to a different place. A stronger place. One where I can’t imagine why the drowning abyss had captured me before.

“She must have thought you were hopeless. She can’t stand collectors who make her look bad.” Ophelia turns her dark eyes to me. “She wasn’t sending me in there to rescue you—she was killing two problems at once. I should have seen it coming. I should have known better than to go anywhere near another collector, even a guppy like you.”

“Thanks,” I say, but it’s light. I was spiraling into the darkness before Ophelia came along, and Candy would have washed me out soon enough. “But like I told you before, it’s not your fault they came after me.”

“I’m not so sure,” she says, eyes downcast. “And it’s just dumb luck that you escaped.” She sighs. “You have some kind of guardian angel looking out for you.”

“I thought that was supposed to be you.” I lean in to kiss her, but she dodges me and presses a hand to my chest, firmly pushing me away and putting a few more inches between us.

“I am
not
your guardian angel.” Her lips purse tight, and her serious face beats back any thoughts of kissing, in spite of her hands lingering on my chest. “You’re sweet, baby. Too sweet. And you’ve got some kind of lucky star following you around. But you can’t count on that. And you can’t fight what we are; you’ll just wear yourself out or get yourself killed trying. That’s why I didn’t tell you about Candy and her evilness with the kids. Because you’re the kind who would run off and want to do something foolish, like try to save everyone. Like Valac and his crazy mission, before he figured out it was useless. Like when you came here, trying to save me. I don’t need to give you another hopeless cause, Lirium.” She shakes her head. “You should already be dead. I don’t know why Kolek didn’t kill you yesterday. There’s no way he’s going to let you get away with showing him up.”

“But he
did
let me get away with it,” I say. “I don’t know why. I guess he respects me now, for standing up to him. And he made it perfectly clear he’ll go after my mom if I don’t do everything exactly like he wants.”

“Well, that’s simple, then,” she says. “You do what Kolek wants.”

I pull back farther. “It doesn’t bother you? All the things you know he’s going to ask you to do?” I narrow my eyes. “Are you on the Valac plan? Collecting up lives so you can live forever?”

She looks away. “I don’t know about living forever, baby. I’m just trying to make it to next week.”

“I’m going to get out, Ophelia. One way or another.” It may be via the morgue, but I’m a lot less afraid of that option now. There’s no staying here—that much I know.

“I know,” she says, looking back to me. “Which is why I’m going to help you.”

My mouth hangs open. “You are?”

“I
am
trying to keep you alive, remember? And you seem to have a talent for pissing off our mob boss. Maybe he likes you, for now. Maybe he wants to keep you as a pet, like Emeryk did with me. But you can’t count on that, Lirium. If you keep pushing him, he
will
kill you. We need to get you out before that happens.”

I put my hand on the door behind her, leaning close again. Close enough to kiss her, but I don’t, I just hold her cheek lightly with my fingertips. “Have I told you recently how extremely beautiful you are?”

“Intelligent, too.”

“And ridiculously sexy.” I caress her face, ready to follow that up with some serious making out, but then I realize what she actually said. “Wait. You’re coming with me, right?”

She avoids my intense, close gaze. “It’s extremely rare for collectors to leave the mob, at least not in any way you want to go. I don’t know how I’m going to get you out of here, but there may only be room for one of us. And I’ll be fine here.”

 “No, you won’t,” I say, exasperated. “And you deserve better than this. You deserve a life where you don’t have to payout to corrupt politicians or transfer out whoever crosses Kolek next. Besides, we should stick together. We’ll have a better chance that way.”

“We’ll see when the time comes.” She still won’t look in my eyes. “I may not have a choice.”

But I know she’s wrong. That’s the dangerous thing running free inside me:
choice
.

“You always have a choice.” I cup her cheek in my hand and drop my voice. “Choose to be with me, Ophelia.”

I can see it working on her. The possibility. The hope that there could be something better. Something more. Or maybe it’s the fact that I’m shirtless with her hands splayed on my chest, the air between us heating again. She’s about to say something when the door slides open, pulling my hand with it and throwing me off balance. I hold on to her to right myself.

Outside the door stands Valac. His face twists into a snarl, and his teeth are clenched. I can hear the whisper of his breath through them. His gaze bounces between me half-dressed and Ophelia in her pajamas in my arms, and he can’t seem to decide which is more horrifying.

“What are
you
doing here?” Valac asks Ophelia.

Shit.

Our chance to plan our escape just evaporated.

I step back from Ophelia, belatedly, although I guess there’s not much point in trying to pretend Valac didn’t just catch her in my room. In my arms. With us both dressed for bed.

“I just came for a visit,” Ophelia says lightly, but she subtly reaches to my side and slips the stolen swipecard into the pocket of my sweat pants. Valac’s chest is still heaving, and I think he’s too busy alternating glares at me and Ophelia to see.

 “Kolek doesn’t want you spending time together,” he says. “I thought I made that
perfectly
clear.” He must be talking to Ophelia, because I haven’t seen him since he shut me in. I can’t figure out why he looks like he’s about to blow a gasket. Maybe Kolek threatened to cut off some fingers if he didn’t keep us in line. Otherwise, I can’t imagine why he cares if Ophelia and I have a stolen tryst in my room.

I finally notice the two people behind him, shrunken back from the exchange at my door. A young woman and man stand awkwardly with their arms looped around each other’s waists, gripping a bit too tightly. Both are dressed in clothes that amp their sex appeal far more than required, the girl in a skimpy black dress that hugs her curves, and the boy in clothes almost as tight. I’m certain they’re sex workers, but I don’t have time to wonder why they’re here before Valac swings his wrath to me.

“Kolek has a present for you.” But his words are out of sync with the anger on his face. He’s barely containing his rage—at me, at Ophelia, at both of us for apparently breaking whatever rule Kolek has about keeping us apart. Only that doesn’t make any sense. Something else is going on, but I have no idea what it is.

“A present?” I ask, trying to say something that won’t light the powder keg that, for unknown reasons, is Valac at the moment.

“Believe me, it wasn’t my idea.” He jerks a thumb, motioning Ophelia out of the room. She trails a hand across my chest as she lightly steps out the door and heads toward her room down the hall. Valac glares after her, then braces his hands against the door frame and leans across the threshold.

“Why couldn’t you just do what I said?” His voice transforms into a harsh whisper, but the anger is still full boil. I finally figure out he’s angry about the boy.

I’m almost afraid to ask, but I do anyway. “How’s the kid?”

Valac closes his eyes, like he can’t believe the unmitigated gall of me asking. When he opens them, our faces are close as he hovers just inside my room.

“He’ll live.” Valac holds my gaze. Just as I think he means something different than what he said, he pushes away from the door frame and takes a step back to the sex workers.

They’re clutching each other, even more jittery than before.

Valac slides his arm around the shoulder of the young man, grasping onto the silk of his shirt and bunching it roughly. The girl quickly drops her hand from the boy, who has plastered on an alluring grin for Valac that doesn’t quite cover the nervous twitch in his cheek.

Valac is still staring at me. “Have a good time.” He nods to the girl, and she skitters over, eyes wide like a frightened deer. I pull her inside, my hand on her hip, getting her out of the line of Valac’s angry stare.

Once she’s in the room, he waves his hand at the door. It slides shut and clicks.

I stare at the door, imagining Valac, full of rage, dragging his hapless sex worker back to his room. Whatever it is that’s pissed him off, I’m sure he’s going to drown it in a night of ecstasy with the boy, the same way I used to recover from paying out by ordering one of Madam A’s girls. Even with a plan to live forever, even with Valac’s insistence that he doesn’t have a soul left, he’s still trying to fill the holes in it.