Falling for Sarah (29 page)

Heart pounding, she could only stare as the breath backed up in her lungs. His hair was still damp from the shower. The scent of his aftershave carried on the air. The navy blue polo and khakis he wore showed off his muscled perfection. He was really here. She hadn’t had any warning, hadn’t had an opportunity to prepare.

“Hey,” he said.

Austin cleared his throat. “I was just about to tell you the boss is back.”

“So I see. Welcome home, Ethan.” Sarah stood, hoping she sounded casual as hurt and longing careened through her system with equal force. She took her uneaten toast to the sink, pushed it into the disposal, needing a moment to compose herself. She washed her plate with precise, exacting strokes, stalling, attempting to steel herself to the shock of meeting his gaze again. “Kylee, we should find Hailey and get you settled in. Austin, I’ll be ready after I get my purse and camera bag.”

“I’m taking you this morning.”

Ethan’s words sunk in and Sarah whirled. “No. You don’t have to do that. I’m going with Austin.”

“Austin’s been reassigned. Now that I’m here, he’ll go back to private duty during the day.”

“Oh.” She glanced at Austin as he gave her a shrug. What could she say to that? She wasn’t ready for this, wasn’t ready to deal with him being back in her life. “Are you sure you don’t want to stay home and rest? You look tired.”

Eyes unreadable, he set Kylee on her feet. “I’m fine.”

“Let me get my purse and tell Hailey I’m ready to go.”

Sarah rushed from the room and up the stairs, stopping when she made it to the bedroom. She lowered herself to the bed, resting her face in her hands. Ethan was back and the timing couldn’t be worse. She was still reeling from one shock and now she had to deal with another.

She ran her fingers through her hair and blew out a breath as she glanced at the clock. It was time to go. How was she going to handle this? What was she going to do?

As she tried to find her calm, she remembered her resolve to start a new chapter in her life—surprising new twist and all. Nothing had to be decided right now. She would take the time she needed to sort it out. Steadier, she grabbed her purse, her camera bag and knocked on Hailey’s door.

Hailey, pretty in her vivid red t-shirt and jeans, opened the door, smiling. “Morning.”

“Hi. I really have to be on my way. I’m going to be late for my doctor’s appointment. Are you ready for Kylee?”

“Sure.” Hailey closed her door and they headed downstairs. “I’m so glad you’re going to have a checkup. I’ve been worried about you. All this stress has messed with your immune system.”

Guilty that her friends were concerned, she tried a smile. “Don’t be worrying about me. I’m just fine.” She looked closely at her energetic young friend and frowned. “You know, you should get out of the house one of these evenings. I’m sure we can arrange for Austin to take you. You must be going stir crazy around here.”

“Austin? Why should I go out with Austin? I mean he’s nice and totally hot and all, but I don’t know…”

Wasn’t this interesting? Smiling, Sarah pulled on Hailey’s arm, stopping her. “I just meant that if you wanted to go shopping, catch a movie or grab a bite out, we would arrange for someone to take you. It’ll be safer that way.”

Hailey’s cheeks burned bright. “Of course. Yeah, of course. Maybe sometime this week. Although, I’m not bored here. This place is like a resort.”

Chuckling, Sarah squeezed Hailey’s shoulder. She’d needed this; a brush of normal before she started her long day. She took Hailey’s hand. “Have I told you how lucky I am to have you in my life? Thank you for all that you do for Kylee and me. You’re such a special friend.”

“Sarah, you’re going to get me all sniffly. You, me, and Morgan need to get together for a movie night in Ethan’s game room. When you’re finished with this photo shoot, let’s do it.”

“I’m hoping this will be over by then. We’ll be able to have a movie night at my house.”

“That sounds good too, but I like Ethan’s TV better. It practically takes up the whole wall.”

Sarah laughed. “We’ll have to see what we can do.”

Ethan stepped into the hallway. “Hi, Hailey.”

She smiled. “Hi. Welcome back.”

“Thanks. We should get going. Hunter will follow behind and wait outside the doctor’s office.

Sarah blew out a breath. “Okay. I just need to say goodbye to Kylee.”

Buckled into the Rover, Sarah stared out at the Pacific rushing by her window, unsure of what to say. Her steepled fingers bunched and relaxed, bunched and relaxed, until her palms began to cramp. She rested her hands on her thighs, counting down the minutes until she could get out of the SUV.

Ethan cleared his throat. “So, how’s the shoot going?”

She made brief eye contact before looking down at her sandaled foot, moving double-time against the floor mat. “Great, really great. Super, in fact.”

Tense silence filled the space again.

Frayed nerves began to snap. Sarah reached forward and turned on the radio, giving herself something to do. She fiddled from station to station until Ethan placed his hand over hers. She pulled away from the warmth of his skin, gave him an over-bright smile before she stared straight ahead.

“Listen, Sarah, I don’t know if this is the best time, but I was hoping we could talk this evening.”

She glanced at his profile. The regret was there, in his eyes, in his voice; she couldn’t stand it. It was easier to figure this out now, before things got even more complicated.

Eventually she would have no choice but to tell him about the baby, but she would deliver the news without the tatters of a broken relationship hanging in the air. A clean cut was better. “Why don’t I make this easier for both of us? It’s pretty clear that what we had between us isn’t working for you, so why don’t we just leave it at that.” Biting her lip, she turned toward the window, willing the tears to stay away as her heart shattered.

“Let’s talk about this later, when we have more time.”

He didn’t deny anything she’d said. “No. There’s really nothing to talk about. Let’s leave it alone, Ethan.”

Ethan turned into the medical complex, pulled into a parking spot.

Sarah got out before the vehicle was fully stopped, needing to get to the bathroom before she crumbled. She rushed for the door, but he caught her before she could get inside.

“Wait a minute, Sarah.”

“I’m going to be late.” Much to her horror, her voice broke. “Please, let me go.”

He held her for another moment, searching her face as she blinked at unshed tears. Ethan released her arm and she walked into the waiting room, doing her best to give the receptionist a smile.

“Good morning. I have an 8:30 appointment. My name’s Sarah Johnson.”

“Yes. Hello, Sarah. Go ahead and have a seat. The nurse will be right out to get you.”

“Thank you.” Turning, she almost slammed into Ethan. Their eyes met before she took a seat.

Just as they sat, the nurse called. Sarah bolted from the chair and walked through the door.

“Will your husband be joining us today?”

She met Ethan’s stare. “No, he’ll wait for me out here.” She turned, leaving him behind.

The nurse showed her to the examining room and immediately got started. She wrapped the blood pressure cuff around Sarah’s arm. “You don’t look like you’re feeling very well. Your color’s a little off. Why don’t you tell me what’s going on so I can put your symptoms in the computer for the doctor.”

“I had a positive pregnancy test. I’m here to confirm it.”

The nurse beamed. “Oh, well, congratulations. Let’s get a urine sample and we’ll go from there.”

Minutes later, the doctor examined her. “You’re about nine weeks, Sarah, almost ten. You can take your legs down.”

Sarah pulled her feet from the stirrups and began to sit up.

“Wait just a minute. You’re far enough along for us to pick up a heartbeat. Let’s make sure baby’s off to a good start.”

Sarah nodded, lying back again. Even with the professional confirmation, she couldn’t truly believe she was pregnant. The doctor squeezed a dab of warm blue fluid on her lower abdomen and switched on the small Doppler machine. A burst of static filtered through the speaker as Dr. Humphrey slid the probe around. The fast and steady rhythm of a tiny heartbeat soon filled the room.

Disillusionment was instantly replaced with wonder and love. Sarah grinned. “That’s my baby. Oh, listen to that sound. I don’t think there’s a better sound.” In that moment it didn’t matter that Ethan didn’t want her, that he didn’t love her. He’d given her a child. She would treasure the baby they had made in affection if not in love.

After the goop had been wiped away and she dressed, Sarah went out to the receptionist’s desk with her yellow form.

“Why, honey, you look like you’re feeling a little better already.”

She smiled. “I am.”

“We’ll see you back here in a month, unless you want to transfer your care to OB.”

Wincing, she glanced over her shoulder, hoping Ethan didn’t hear. “No. I’ll be back next month. This is a busy time of year for me. Can I call you and we’ll figure out an appointment when I’m in front of my calendar?”

“Certainly. Congratulations, honey, and don’t forget your vitamin.”

“Thanks.”

As she walked toward the door, Ethan got up to follow.

He took her arm. “Wait, Sarah. I go first.” He punched a number into his cell. “We all set? Okay, we’re coming out.”

With the coast clear, Ethan walked Sarah to her side of the vehicle. When she was tucked inside, he shut the door.

He got in on his side and stared at her.

She pulled sunglasses from her purse, put them on, wanting the barrier. “We should go. I’m already running late.”

“At least tell me you’re okay.”

“I’m fine.”

He looked at her a moment longer before he started the car, and they headed for the shoot.

When they pulled up on location, Sarah’s mood immediately plummeted. Nicolette walked from her trailer in little more than black floss.

Damn it. With everything going on, she’d forgotten she would be photographing the French pain in her ass today. Sarah stepped from the Rover, pulling her camera bag with her. She started toward the sand with Ethan at her side. “Austin or Hunter usually stays by the trailer. You don’t have to come with me.”

“I know how to do my job, Sarah.”

She glanced at him as she removed her sandals and walked to the center of the beach front. Sarah took her equipment from the bags Melanie had set up, began to read her light meters.

Melanie rushed forward. “Hi, honey. How are you today?”

“I’m feeling pretty good.”

Hugging her, Melanie whispered, “Congratulations.”

Concerned she was drawing attention from Ethan, Sarah pulled back. “Thanks. Let’s get things going. I want this one over as quickly as possible.”

Melanie swiped a honey toned ringlet back from her forehead, smiled, rolled her eyes. “I can’t imagine why. What a pain in the ass. Let’s send her back to Paris, fast.”

Sarah grinned.

“It is so nice that you could join us today, Sarah,” Nicolette said as she sauntered toward them.

“And here we go,” Sarah muttered. “Hello, Nicolette. I’m sorry I kept you waiting.”

“Perhaps I should wait longer while you finish your conversation with your friend.”

Unwilling to rise to the bait, Sarah pulled the camera in front of her face, checking her focus. She followed Nicolette through the lens, watching the dark haired vixen smile slowly, seductively. “Well, well, well, Ethan darling, I had no idea you would be here today. Berlin two weeks ago and now the beach.”

“Hello, Nicky.”

Nicolette’s fingers brushed down the front of his shirt, accentuating the outline of his six pack. “Perhaps we will have dinner while I am here and pick up where we left off.” Her nail skimmed over his palm as she held it out. “I’ve missed your hands, Ethan. You have such creative hands.”

“That’s enough.” He pulled back, looking in Sarah’s direction. His eyes stared straight into hers through the lens.

Sarah let the camera strap fall around her neck and walked off, pulling lenses at random from her bag. The stab of betrayal was sharp and painful, but it was probably better this way. The in-your-face reality check reminded her that what she’d had with Ethan a month ago no longer existed. He would go on as he always had, dating who he pleased when he pleased. He hadn’t wasted any time.