Family Ties (36 page)

I burst into tears one more time and he lets me cry without saying a word, like he’s always done. “What happened?” he asks when I quiet, his voice sharp with the concern I’m so familiar with.

“I saw Jason kissing another woman.” Instead of rushing through like I did with Arissa, I take my time, giving him more details. The crying jag at the beginning of the call keeps me from feeling like I’m falling into oblivion while I talk. Or it’s just Hunter and his silent support, always letting me get the ragged emotions out of my system before asking questions. Or both.

“Do you still love him?” he asks.

“The only things I feel right now are angry, betrayed, and heartbroken.”

“Think about it. If she’s been harassing him like Becky and Nicole did to us, isn’t it possible that Mandy went just one step further than Becky did the day she had Jason pinned against his car? And if that’s the case, can you move on with him? Because Tommy is right. You need to work through this with him if you’re going to spend your life together. That’s love, Sara.”

“I know he’s right. I know you’re right. It just hurts so much right now.” My voice wavers as pain overtakes my heart, threatening to trample it.

“Put the phone down and get a blanket.”

“What?” What does a blanket have to do with anything?

“Don’t ask, just do.”

I blow out an exasperated breath. “Fine.” I grab the comforter out of the closet. “Done.”

“Is your futon folded up or did you pull it out for the night?”

“Folded.” I still don’t get it. The blanket. The state of my futon. Where is he going with this?

“Wrap yourself up tight in the blanket, then wedge yourself into the crease of the futon.”

“Are you crazy?”

“Do it, Sara.” He’s not playing around. I know that tone.

I follow his friendly order. “Okay.”

“How does it feel?”

“Oddly comforting.”

“That’s me holding you since I can’t be there.”

He always knows what to do and say to comfort me. Heaviness settles into my body and I let out a yawn. “Thank you, Hunter.”

“I’m always here for you.”

CHAPTER EIGHTY-THREE

The phone rings as I remove the lasagna from the oven. I pick it up from the end table, then buzz Jason in and open the door. I return to the kitchen and cut up the lasagna.

“Smells good,” Jason says, closing the door.

I spin around. His warm-ups and a white UCLA t-shirt hang loose on him. He sets his duffel next to the door, takes off his jacket, and drops it on the bag.

I grab two plates and use a spatula to pull out a portion for each plate.

He enters the dining room. “The place looks great. I can set up the stereo for you before I leave if you want.”

I set the plates down on the table.

He pulls me to him by my hips.

“Don’t…“ I start, pressing my hands against his chest.

He uses the side of his index finger under my chin to lift my head, and brushes my chin with his thumb. My resolve melts as I recognize the spark in his eyes reserved just for me. He holds my gaze for a minute. My heart flutters.

Why does it betray me? I’m still angry and hurt. 

“I’m starving,” he says, glancing at the table.

He seats himself and I remove the salad from the fridge, setting it on the table as I sit down.

He takes my hand and wraps it up in his. “Thank you for cooking. It really does smell wonderful. I wasn’t just saying that.” 

I pull my hand away. “You’re welcome,” I say, keeping my face flat, expressionless. 

He serves himself some salad and hands me the bowl. I add some to my plate and set the bowl back on the table.

“This is great,” he says, swallowing his first bite.

“Mom’s recipe. She and your mom put together a little box of their own recipes.”

“That was nice of them.” He takes a bite of salad. “Can I take some back with me?”

“Yeah,” I say, then add jokingly, “I know the cafeteria food is only good for one thing.”

He breaks out into a huge grin. I smile for the first time since last night.

“I miss that smile, Parker.” He lays his fork on his plate. “I’m sorry—“

I shake my head. “I’d like to
not
lose my appetite while I still have one.”

“Whatever you want.”

“How was the flight yesterday?” I ask, making small talk.

We spend the rest of dinner talking about the road trip and the upcoming tournament starting Sunday. We discuss going home for Thanksgiving while doing the dishes.

“Do you want to leave tomorrow night or Thursday morning?” he asks, passing me the salad bowl to dry.

“Early Thursday morning.”

“Do I get to stay the night tomorrow?” He dries his hands on a towel.

“I don’t know.” I place the bowl in a bottom cabinet, then open the drawer above, fishing out a set of keys. He cups his hand and I drop them.

“Does this mean…?” He allows the question to drift off.

“No. It means I’m giving you your set of keys to our apartment and trusting you to respect whatever I decide.” 

He leads me to the futon and sits, turning his body to the side so his left leg is in front of him. I sit mirroring him, my hand still in his.

Keep an open mind.

He makes unwavering eye contact with me. “Her name is Amanda Dickerson. Everyone calls her Mandy. You were right. I do know her well. I met her at the end of ninth grade at the mall one day. I was already not looking forward to Summer Break, because it meant not seeing you for three months.

“She was bubbly and being with her took my mind off you. We wound up going to a movie before leaving the mall. I don’t even remember what movie, because we were making out for most of it. I saw her almost every day after that. A few weeks later, I slept with her. She was my first. I wasn’t hers.”

My jaw slackens and I cover my mouth with my other hand for a moment, then drop it in my lap. It never occurred to me that he might have had sex with his ex-girlfriends. How stupid of me for not asking.

I remove my hand from his and weave my fingers together, playing with my ring as he continues.

“When I met her, I was able to stop thinking about you all the time. I thought I was over you, so I was moving on in my own way. But the longer I was with her, the more I realized I didn’t really like her. I liked that she was a distraction from you. I still wanted
you
.

“We ran into each other at that party after I moved into the dorms, and she latched on to me. I hadn’t seen her since breaking up with her, because she went to Del Mar High. I told her about you and she still pursues me like I’m an option.”

I swallow the lump in my throat. “Who else did you sleep with?”

“Becky.” 

That explains her relentless pursuit of Jason. “Who else?”

“No one. Just Amanda and Becky. I meant it when I broke up with Becky that you were the only one I wanted.” 

“Then why go out with her?”

“Because I was immature and I did stupid things.” He runs a hand through his hair then cups the back of his neck. He drops his hand before continuing. “I was still missing you and I wound up hooking up with Becky as another distraction. I was unhappy, Parker. It doesn’t excuse what I did, but that’s how it was for me.” 

“And yesterday?”

“Just like I told you. Mandy threw herself at me.” 

“I saw your hands on her.”

“I was trying to push her away. Her waist was the only place I could put my hands since her arms were around my neck.” He reclaims my hand, “I should have told you all this before. Back when I broke up with Becky. But you had so much going on, I thought it would cause more harm.”

“We were always friends first, J. I know I was upset when you dated other girls, but it’s because you were flirting with me at the same time. It sent me mixed signals and reinforced things Simon told me.”

“I’ve never seen you as damaged. Not once. Anyone damaged couldn’t come to school day after day and face the world while wearing those invisible scars. The horror in your life growing up made you real and the most beautiful girl I know. Most girls pretend to be anyone but themselves. You have always been you. You never tried to be anyone but you.

“You’re incredibly resilient. You stood up to your parents, to your sister, to people at school, to social workers, to me. A truly damaged person couldn’t do that.”

Tears streak down my face as the truth of his words sinks in.

He swipes the tears away with his thumb, then runs his fingers through my hair to cradle my head. “You never took shit from me. Whatever I dished out, you gave back. I love that about you. Everyone else was quick appease me so I’d like them more. You thought for yourself and had your opinions without caring what other people thought of them.

“You’re this amazing force of nature that rushes over me when I’m with you. I truly love you, Sara Allison Jericho. Always and forever.

“I can’t promise I’ll never fuck up again. We both know I will. I
can
promise that I am and will be faithful to you. You mean too much to me to throw it all away.”

“I should have asked you about the other girls,” I say, rubbing my hands against my thighs. “You’re lucky to have a roommate who thinks of you as a brother.”

“What did Tommy say?”

“That I should keep an open mind and shouldn’t throw away the last four years. That if we’re getting married, we need to work through all the crap together. Hunter and Arissa agree with him.” 

He grins. “Does this mean you’re willing to work through the crap?”

“Yes.”

He brings my hand up and kisses my palm. “Thank you, Parker.” 

“You, Dad, and Hunter are the men I trust most in this world. No more secrets. All the cards on the table now. If you think I can’t handle it, just remember how resilient I am.”

“I promise. There’s nothing else.” He draws me onto his lap, cupping the back of my neck with his free hand and descending upon my mouth with fervor.

I run my hands into his hair and break away, shaking my head. “Too soon,” I say, climbing off his lap.

He doesn’t argue or attempt to tug me back to him. “The guys would love to see you if you want to come back with me tonight for a bit. Or tomorrow.”

“Tonight would probably be better if we’re going to leave early Thursday.” 

Jason puts the leftovers away in the mini-fridge and his duffel in his room while Tommy and I lean against the wall outside talking.

“Seriously?” he asks. 

“That’s why she won’t leave him alone. The other girl, Becky, wouldn’t leave us alone either. Which makes sense why now, but didn’t back then.” 

“I’ll say.” 

“Thanks again. If it weren’t for you, I wouldn’t be standing here right now. Hell, my biological parents physically fought with each other and verbally abused each other. I didn’t exactly have great role models.”

“But you do now with your adoptive parents,” he states.

A woman in a white t-shirt and shorts blazes by. Tommy whips around and seizes her upper arm before she can get through the door. “Nuh uh. You’re not going in there,” he says to her.

“Tommy, I just want to talk to him,” she whines.

“No. You’re going to talk to her,” he says, pointing to me with his free hand.

“This is
her
?” I ask.

I take a closer look. Her eyelids are coated thick with eye shadow. The pink painting her cheek and lips is the wrong shade of bright on her. Her light brown eyes are lost behind the excessive eyeliner. Her dirt blonde hair is pulled back into a ponytail and her bangs drop in a straight edge to her brow.

“Who is she? Why do I have to talk to her?” she asks.

I push off the wall and take a step towards her with my arms crossed, keeping my voice even. “Because I’m Jason’s fiancée and you’re trying to sabotage our relationship. If you don’t leave him alone, you’ll have to deal with me.”

Her jaw drops, then closes just as fast. She wrenches out of Tommy’s grasp and lifts her chin in the air.

“What’s going on?” Jason asks, stepping outside. Confusion transforms to dread on his face.

“Your girlfriend just threatened me!” Mandy screams.

Jason turns to me and I shrug a shoulder with indifference coursing through me. He sets his gaze back to her. “Get out of here and leave me alone, Mandy. I don’t want to have to tell you again,” he says, not stern enough in my opinion.

He has a lot of compassion for others unless they pose a direct threat to himself or his loved ones. I love this trait of his, but it makes it difficult for him to take a stand in these situations, explaining part of the reason why Mandy won’t leave him alone. 

“Does she know about us?” she asks.

“I do,” I answer for him, taking charge, “and like I said, if you don’t leave him alone, you’re going to have to deal with me. Just because you slept with him doesn’t mean he loves you still.” I knit my brow. “What was it you said she was? A distraction, right?”

His eyes go wide. “Parker!“

I raise my hand up to stop him and look back at Mandy. “All you were was a distraction to him because in truth, he always loved me. Never you.”

“You’re going to wish you were never born!” she screams.

“Someone already beat you to that.”

Mandy lunges for me, but Tommy grabs her by the arm again and hauls her back.

“Fuck! Let me go, Tommy!” She struggles under his grip.

“Only if you promise to leave all of us alone.”

“Fine! Let me go!”

Tommy releases her and she storms off.

“You fight dirty,” he says, grinning and raising his hand. I meet his high five and smile.

“Parker, what the hell was that?” Jason asks, his eyes narrowed at me.

I cross my arms in front of me again. “Doing something you should have done.”

Tommy slips inside.

“That was cruel and uncharacteristic,” he points out.

“Maybe.”

“Are you taking your anger out on her instead of me?”

“I don’t know, J,” I answer, annoyed. “Are you trying to pick a fight with me?”

“No, but you give barbs,” he replies, the tension increasing in his voice with each word. “You don’t go for the dig, then twist it.”

“What was I supposed to do?” I throw my arms out. “She was trying to waltz into your room right in front of me.”

“You didn’t have to be so heartless.”

Sarcasm sharpens my tongue. “Oh, and harassing you is kind?”

We stare at each other, agitated. I’m still hurt and he’s struggling to keep himself together since Mike’s death. We can’t keep this up and expect to be unscathed at the end. One of us has to walk away. “I’m going home.”

I step inside and grab my purse. “Bye, Tommy.”

“Leaving so soon?” he asks, the confusion plain on his face.

“Yeah. Ask your roommate. I’ll talk to you later.” 

I walk back out to Jason waiting with his hands planted on his hips. “Parker—“