Family Ties (Hidden Secrets) (12 page)

“
Thank you.”

“
What?” She breathed.

I
laughed, “Thank you for breakfast.”

“
Oh yeah, you’re welcome.”

“
Can I thank you like that?” Teased Joel.

“
Don’t even think about it,” I growled and Mary laughed resting her head on my shoulder.

We
all talked for a few more minutes and enjoyed the company.  She stood and said she needed to go get dressed and call her manager. She excused herself and left.

“
You lucky bastard,” they all said in unison.

I
just smiled. 

“
You met her a week ago, huh? Is that why you stayed longer?” Scott questioned.

“
Yeah, so?” I glared at him.

This
time, though, Scott glared right back.  Could my friend have figured out what was going on? Shit!  I needed time to decide what I was going to do.  I really liked Mary. No that’s not true, I think I am in love with her. But then there is the factor of my family… Maybe I needed to create space between us? Push her away a bit to clear my head and think about what I should do.  How in the world am I going to do that?  How can I push her away when all I want to do is hold her close and never let her go?

Chapter
Eleven

Mary

I
headed to my room and changed into a pair of jeans and a T-shirt.  Then I pulled my hair up into a pony tail and put on my hiking boots.  It was the best that I could do.  Pausing before I pulled my cell phone out. It was a call I had to make and frankly, I was ready to get it done and over with.  Dialing Kyle’s number, it rang twice before he answered.

“
Hall,” he said tersely.

“
Hey, it’s me Mary.”

“
Where the hell are you!”

“
Um…stop yelling would you?”

“
Stop yelling?  Stop yelling?  Oh honey, you have no idea what else I am going to do once you get your fat ass in here now!”

“
I wish you would quit c-calling me that.”

“
I only state the truth!  Now where are you?! And when are you going to be here?”

“
I’m out of town.  I’m not coming in.  In fact, I am taking a week off at least.”

“
You WHAT!”

“
I am figuring some things out with my life.  Part of it is going to take about a week to figure out.  I will call when I am ready to come back.”

“
You fat ass bitch!  You are going to pay for this, do you understand me?!  You think you have paid before…Oh no you are really going to pay now!”

“
K-Kyle, y-you don’t have to make thr-threats.” My heart was hammering in my chest.  He terrified me even over the phone.

“
Threats? Oh no, I make no threats.  This is a promise!  Just you wait.  If you aren’t here I may pay some of your dancers a visit.”

“NO! O-okay, I will come…”  Suddenly the door flung open and Tobey was yanking the phone from my hand.

“
She is not coming back!  You will not come near her or this tape will be played for the cops and your ass will be in jail.  Stay the hell away from my girl!”  He hung up the phone and turned to me, “You do not have to do what he says.  You need to start doing for you.  Starting here; starting now.”

“
But he said he was going to take it out on my dancers.  He will.  He has done it before.  I have to go back for their safety.”
He cupped my face, “What about your safety?  I cannot stand the thought of you being hurt. Not when you could have been safe here in my arms.”  He leaned down and kissed me again.

“
Now we are burning hours; we need to get to work.  I will call your brother or brother-in-law for you if that will make you feel better about your dancers.” 

I
nodded.  He used my phone and I listened to him explain that Kyle was threatening me and if I didn’t show up, he was going to take it out on the dancers.  Then, within ten minutes we were heading out the door towards the barn.

My
mind went back to what happened this morning and I had an urge to tuck tail and run, but I kept pushing forward.  He didn’t know I was supposed to be there.  Come to think of it, Tobey never said if it was okay that I was out there or not.  Swallowing, I made a mental note to not go near anything that I haven’t been given permission to go near first.

Tobey
showed me around.  He explained what things were and how to do some of the menial chores. After about an hour of explanations and showing me, he gave me my  list of chores to start on.  Just as I turned to start working, he quipped behind me. 

“
If you make it past this morning, you will have more chores after lunch.” He smirked.

“
Asshole,” I mumbled under my breath as the guys around him chuckled.

I
was shoveling manure, cleaning horse stalls, carrying hay and all before lunch.  It was about noon when I saw Tobey near the barn.  I walked over to him.

“
Hey, it’s almost lunch. Do you mind if I break and go make lunch for everyone?”

“
You want to make lunch for everyone?  After all you have done so far you still want to add to it?” He says obviously shocked.

“
Yes, please.” 

He
nodded and I ran into the house and made them all a picnic style lunch with a little Kayla twist as I liked to call it.  My sister really was a phenomenal cook.  The whole time I was cooking I was thinking of Kyle’s remarks. 

“…
fat ass…”

The
words echoed in my head like a train’s whistle breaking through the silence.  It bounced off the walls of my head until it was the only way I saw myself. As his words always did. My jeans were a little tight. It was time for my crash diet again, as if I was ever off it really. I would be in big trouble if I gained any weight or worse, stayed the same when I got back.  While the last of the lunch cooked, I ran and got into my running gear again.

Gathering
up the lunches into five servings, I carried it out to the guys with a jug of iced tea for everyone.  As I headed across to the guys, I watched as they all joked around.  What it must be like to have friends that enjoy your company and not what you can do for them.  Shaking the thoughts from my head, I had other things to focus on here.  This was going to be a good week for me.  This is what I needed.  When I reached the guys, I handed the boys their food and then handed Tobey’s his last.

“
Yours comes with something extra.” Even though he didn’t think I could hack it as a rancher, my heart knew he was it for me.  He was the guy I had searched for, but never found.

“
Oh yeah, what’s that?”

“
This.”  I leaned up on my toes and kissed him; a kiss that should only be reserved for the bedroom.  Truth is, I can’t get the image or thought out of my head on being in bed with him.  His sweaty body above me as we make wild and passionate love with each other, it just kept coming back to me even while I was shoveling manure.  When I pulled back from the kiss, I smiled at him.

“
You keep that up and I am going to take you to bed for a ‘nap’.”

“
Mmmm promises, promises.” I giggled

“
Why are you wearing that again?”

“
Oh, while you guys are eating I am going to go for a run.  I won’t take longer than you eat, I promise.  I might do a little more than a mile this time though.  You give me an hour?”

“
Yeah, you can have an hour, but aren’t you going to eat?”

“
I ate while I was making your lunches.”

“
Oh, alright then.  Off you go.  One hour.” 

I
gave him a quick kiss and ran off.

Running
was not just the best exercise for me, but it also gave me time to work through my thoughts and right now, my mind was racing with all kinds of thoughts.  I was way out of my norm here.  It was normal for me to lust after men.  I had no problem just having sex with a guy and not expecting anything the next day or week or whatever.  However, for the first time I was going to admit to myself if to no one else, I really believe I’m falling in love with Tobey.  I had never felt anything like this with any other man before him.  He had protected me without a second thought.  He had stood up for me when I couldn’t do it myself.

This
brought me to my next problem, Kyle.  How was I going to handle him?  He was going to be furious when I got back.  No matter what my brothers did to keep my dancers safe, he was going to get me when I got back.  The thought of it sent a chill up my spine.  I have never talked about all the things that he has done when I don’t pull my full weight or what he feels is my full weight.  I never told anyone what happened when I got back from my lengthy break to be with Kayla. 

“
Well, look who decided to come back after almost eight months on hiatus,” he sneered.

“
I wasn’t on hiatus Kyle. I had a family emergency that I was needed there for.  When I hired you, I told you my family always came first.  Nothing was more important to me than them.  If you have suddenly forgotten it, then that is your fault not mine.  I will not apologize for my absence, I don’t need to.  I’m the boss.  I decide what I do when I want to.  Things need to change around here, and if you can’t handle it then maybe it is time that you just pack your shit and go.”

“
Excuse me? I think you have forgotten the pecking order while you were on this break of yours.  You answer to me, you spoiled rotten little bitch.”

Before
I could react, he smacked me and I fell onto the desk. My brain immediately assaulted me for talking to him the way I did and meeting him alone.  All of which I knew better than to do and yet here I stood doing those exact things.  What amazed me more was the fact that even now after all these years, I’m still shocked to be hit. Or maybe it’s the shock of not doing anything so much as it being done.

He
pinned me down to the desk on my stomach.  I fought with my arms to push myself up, but I couldn’t budge him.  I tried to kick him, but the pencil skirt I wore did not allow me much motion in my legs.  He gripped my hair tightly and pulled my head back. 

I
bit back the scream that wanted to escape. There was a time when I let out the sounds of my pain, but not anymore. I learned quickly, it only fueled him to go further.  It took everything out of me not to scream when my head was slammed into the desk. A burst of bright light flashed before my eyes. He slammed my head three more times and I found it hard to keep myself from passing out.  I could feel his erection digging into my ass.  If I were to pass out I worried that he would take advantage of that. A shudder runs through me.

“
You are mine and it’s time I show you why.”

He
started to inch up my skirt. My body started shaking and a quiet whimper escaped my lips. Kyle had my skirt around my waist and my underwear down around my ankles.  His hand was running circles on my bare ass. His hand would squeeze every once in a while, followed by a groan. Then his hand wasn’t there anymore. I was afraid to open my eyes.  I didn’t want to know what was happening.

A
sharp pain shot from my ass and I felt warmth run down my legs. He did something I could never forget or hide if someone looked close enough.

There
was no way I would tell anyone either because I wouldn’t want anyone, Kayla especially, to feel sorry or responsible for it.  The way they reacted to Kayla’s news she held in for so long wasn’t what I wanted for myself.  It ripped at my parents and siblings; it ripped at me.  I didn’t want to put that on anyone.  No, definitely not, I would figure this out on my own.  Maybe if I enjoy the ranching thing I will just go ahead and buy one and leave singing behind.

I
ran twenty minutes one direction and twenty minutes back.  When I got in front of the house I used the steps to do some lunges, pushups and stretches.  Then I went inside, got myself a drink and headed to my room to get back in my working clothes.  I laughed at the thought of saying ‘working’ clothes.  Regardless of the chores I was given, I was really having fun.  Checking my watch, I saw I still had ten minutes before I needed to be back out there to work. So I sat down on my bed and picked up my pencil and notebook.

Chapter
Twelve

Tobey

I
watched her do her little exercises on the steps and it drove me nuts.  Her barely there shorts seemed to be taunting me with the flesh it exposed. It took everything in me not to run across the yard and take her in the house that minute.  Then the guys had to start with their comments; I knew they were only joking, but it still royally pissed me off. 

“
Damn! What I wouldn’t do with that ass,” Joel joked.

“
You’d have to wait in line man,” John teased.

“
No way man! I said it first,” Joel said as he playfully pushed John.

“
I think you guys might want to chill it out. I don’t think that Tobey here finds your banter so funny.” Scott warned. “Although, it’s not like you care about her or anything…right brother?”

“
Excuse me?” I spun to face Scott with evil in my eyes.

“
It’s not like you care about her or anything, right brother?” Scott says slowly and it pisses me off.

“
You need to watch it Scott.  You are walking on thin ice with me today.  If you don’t want me to beat the shit out of you again, I suggest you back off me.”

“
Really, you want a fight buddy.  Bring it on.  You aren’t the same man that I grew up with and have worked alongside for years.  You’re a stranger.”

“
I’m the stranger?  Where the fuck do you come off with that holier than thou attitude?”

Scott
gets up in my face and bumps my chest with his. I do the same thing.  Joel steps up and moves between us. Placing a hand on both our chests and pushing us apart.

“
What the hell is wrong with you two?” John asks.

“
Ask Captain Asshole here,” Scott hissed. “Remember what I told you before you left?  I can’t believe you brought your biggest mistake ever here and attached it to the ranch.  This isn’t only your fucking livelihood!”

“
What is he talking about?” Joel asked confused.

I
huffed out a deep breath and I glared at Scott for a few minutes longer.  All I could do was clench my fists at my side to keep from laying into him.

Turning
back around, I watched her go inside.  Letting out a breath, I needed to get away from Scott. He was really pissing me off today. To get away from them, I decided to go in and check how her run was.

When
I got to her door, I stopped dead in my tracks.  She was singing again.  I loved hearing her voice.  However, as much as she sang beautifully, I was unsure on the song.  Was she writing it from personal experience?  Intently listening, I stood by the door, listened and waited.  I was completely entranced by her voice, again.

“
You feel it in your bones. It’s as bright as the sunrise color tones. Never off your mind for very long. Always singing the happy songs. But soon it’s lost because you were a fool. To believe someone could love you with no rule. Yes it hurts to be in love that knows no bounds. To be in love and never hear the sounds. Yes it hurts far more than it should. No way he could love you, no, no way he could. Lost…Lost…Lost in losing you.”

My
mouth hung open and I stood there dumbfounded.  No this song had to be personal.  She had to be writing this from experience.  The feelings behind the words were far too strong to be just off the top of her head, but who could she be in love with.  Why couldn’t he love her?  If she loved him, why was she losing him?  Her voice broke through my thoughts.

“
No one could love you Mary Williams.  Get the notion out of your head.  He is just being nice.  You are too fat and too ugly.  Kyle’s right, I am no good.”

Before
I knew what I was doing, I was opening her door, walking in and slamming it behind me.  You wouldn’t be wrong to say I was furious, because I was.  How could she say something like that about herself? How could she believe that scumbag?

“
Oh my God!  You scared the hell out of me!  What are you doing in here?”

“
How could you say something about yourself like that?  You are the most beautiful woman I have ever met.  You are everything.  How could you think ill of yourself?”

“
I…uh…”  She was stunned and completely shocked by my presence. 

It
was then that I realized she stood before me naked.  I was trying hard not to stare, but I failed. Oh yes, I stared at her. My eyes raked up and down her perfect body.  She had perfect curves, toned muscles, legs that seemed to go on for miles.  Raising my eyes higher, they landed on her perfect breasts.  They were not small like one would expect from someone as active as her, but would fit perfectly in the palms of my hands.  She had a neck that called to be kissed and lips that asked the same thing.  I finally met her eyes.  All the time I have spent with her this past week and then watching her in that…that outfit… I was too aroused to stop myself from doing something stupid. 

Moving
across the room, I raised my hands to her cheeks, cupping them.  I looked in her eyes for a moment; giving her a chance to stop me.  In my head, I’m urging her to stop me because I’m afraid I won’t be able to stop or control myself. She didn’t though and she didn’t shy away either. Dropping my eyes to her lips before looking back in her eyes, her tongue darted out ever so slightly wetting her delicious lips. That was it; I had to taste her. I leaned down and took her lips with mine.  It was not a tender kiss like the others we have shared.  No, this was full of need and desperation. 

A
moan escaped from both of us.  It spurred me to deepen the kiss. There was no getting her close enough.  My hands moved down from her face and wrapped around her waist, pulling her tight against me.  Feeling every one of her curves against me only served to drive my need up more.

Mary
moved her hands down my chest and yanked my shirt from my pants pulling a groan from deep within my throat.  I helped her rid me of my clothes, then walked her back to the bed; laying her back on it gently.  Moving I trailed kisses along her jaw and up to her ear.  I nibbled on her ear and she moaned.  God, I wanted her.

“
I don’t think I can wait any longer sweetheart.”

“
Don’t.  I want you too.”

I
took her mouth again in another soul searing kiss.  My hand skimmed up her body and moved to her breast.  I ran my thumb over her nipple while massaging her breast in my hand.  Rising above her, I spread her legs apart with my knee and positioned myself between her legs.  She wrapped her legs around me and I lost the last shred of my control.  I slammed into her like an animal.

“
Oh God, Tobey,” she moaned.

“
Shit,” I breathed.

I
moved fast and hard. She met me thrust for thrust with the same animalistic need. Her nails dug into my back and it heightened the moment.  I knew it wasn’t going to be long.  Mary has literally been driving me crazy for this past week. It had been a while since I had a woman and I never had one that I cared for like this or was as beautiful as she was. 

Wrapping
my arms under her shoulders, I began kissing her neck.  She trailed kisses and her tongue along my shoulder.  Her soft moans were so damn sexy and the taste of her skin was better than anything that I have ever tasted.

“
Damn Mary,” I moaned.

“
Tobey please,” she moaned.

We
moved together as if we were made for each other, fitting perfectly. It wasn’t long before I could feel her tightening around me and that was all it took to send me over the edge. It was an explosion of fireworks and a sensation stronger than I had ever felt.  After what seemed like an eternity, my arms gave out and I collapsed on her.  Our breathing erratic, we just laid there trying to get ourselves under control.  She broke the silence.

“
Wow!” 

I
laughed, I couldn’t stop myself.  I laughed.

“
My thoughts exactly.”  I rose up on my elbows and looked down at her.  Leaning forward, I kissed her gently.  “That was amazing.” 

She
smiled at me.

There
was a knock at the door and Scott shouted in, “If you two are done playing, we have work to do.” 

It
was the sound of Scott’s voice that brought me back to what I have just done.  Not only did I just have the best sex in my life, but I had sex with the very woman that could have possibly hurt some family.  What in the world was I thinking?

I
know exactly what I was thinking! FUCK!

I
needed space.  Time away from her intoxicating scent and body in order to think things over. Moving off the bed, I grabbed my clothes and dressed with my back to her. I could feel the confused look burning into my back.

“
Duty calls us.” I said without turning around and walking toward the door. “Hurry up and get dressed you have a long list to get done.”

I
walked out of the room without a glance back at her.  When I got to the barn, I was greeted with a beaming Scott. I glared at him and he looked at me like I was crazy.

“
Dude, you just got laid by one of the hottest girls alive and you’re still pissy?” He said.

Before
I could reply Mary was coming out of the house calling my name. I felt horrible, but I was pissed off at myself for letting things go that far.  Not knowing what I was going to do, I shouldn’t have let that happen.  Normally, I have more self-control than that.  She was messing me up and I didn’t like it.

“
Tobey. What hap…” She started, but I interrupted her.

“
You need to fix this stall and the one on the end.  When you’re done with something make sure you put the shit back where it belongs.” I snapped.

“
I put it where it seemed to be useful. I thought…”

“
You don’t get to think about things like that.  This is my ranch not yours! You are supposed to do what you are told and nothing more.  If you can’t handle that then you can leave.” I snapped at her finally forcing myself to look at her. 

My
heart broke when I saw her fighting with tears.  This was such a big fucking mess and now I’m not sure I can go back from the way I just treated her even if I wanted to.  To her right now, I just fucked her brains out and walked away like every other guy in her world has.

FUCK!

“Scott, give her the run down on the afternoon list and make sure she doesn’t screw it up.” With that I stormed off.

My
head was about to explode and I needed a few moments to myself before it happened.  Things have changed, I have changed.  The question for me now was what I was going to do about it.  Honestly, I don’t know.  Playing the last hour over and over in my head, I realized that I’m not even sure I could change or fix things even if I wanted to.  That thought just pissed me off even more.

What
upset me more than anything was that I know I am in love with her.  Without a doubt, know that she is it for me, but will never be mine.  I can’t give her me right now.  Not when I have the looming family factor hanging over my head. For the first time, I’m the one being hurt because I’m hurting someone I love.

Fuck!