Fated Memories (23 page)

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Authors: Judith Ann McDowell

BOOK: Fated Memories
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Eyeing the lanky youth standing just inside the door, wearing a new blue denim shirt and dark blue jeans, his blond hair slicked down, she smiled. “Hello, Jack, it’s good to see you again.”


Evenin, Miz Charlotte.” His nervous hands played with the brim of his hat. “Is Jessie around? I’ve come to take her for a ride in my new buggy.”


No she ain’t, Jack. She must be out around the ranch somewhere. If you want, you can go ahead and see if you can find her.”


All right, I’ll do that.” Jack’s bright blue eyes lit up. “You have a good evenin’, Miz Charlotte.” He went out, closing the door behind him.

The thought of seeing Jessie never failed to make Jack Sinclair feel like he could lasso the moon. Jessie had always been the prettiest girl in the county. Lots prettier than the saloon girls in Cut Bank who walked around wearin’ low-cut dresses in broad daylight. Even though he was eighteen now and old enough to go into the saloons, Jack knew his daddy would skin him alive if he ever caught him going into a place that sold liquor. The devil’s brew is what his mama called it. But it sure would be fun to sneak off and have a mug of beer, if only to find out how it tasted. Some of the boys around the county shied away from trying to court Jessie because of her daddy’s money, but not Jack. He had made up his mind a long time ago to win her and tonight he planned to get started. Stopping long enough to shine his new boots on the pant leg of his jeans, Jack whistled a happy tune to settle his nerves, as he spied Jessie talking with someone up ahead. “Hey, Jessie,” he called out, hastening his steps.

Turning to see who called to her, she breathed an irritated sigh. “Oh darn, it’s Jack Sinclair. I forgot he wanted to take me for a ride in his new buggy this evenin’.”


You should not disappoint him. The smile on his face says he is very happy to see you.” Two Spirits grinned, turning away.


Will you meet me later out by the trees?” Jessie called out.

Stopping in mid-stride, he turned to look at her. “No, Jessie. I have told you before; it would not be good for you to be found alone with me.” He walked away before she could say more.


Hey, Jessie, who was ya talkin’ to?” Jack walked up beside her.


Just one of the ranch hands.” Jessie turned away to quickly button the first two buttons of her blouse.

Jack strained his eyes, trying to see into the fading light. “Looked like an Indian. Don’t tell me your pa’s hirin’ Indians to work the ranch,” he laughed, falling in beside her as she made her way to the house.


What if he is, Jack? They gotta live just like everyone else.”


Yeah that’s true, but that’s what reservations are for. It’s bad enough the government’s gotta feed’em. Now they’re takin’ a whiteman’s job?”


Listen, Jack,” Jessie spun around to face him, “I think you’d better go on home. I don’t much feel like goin’ ridin’ tonight.”


Hey, what is this?” Jack took hold of her arm. “Last week you sounded all excited ‘bout goin’ for a ride with me. Now you act like you can’t wait to get rid of me.”


That was then. Right now I want to go in the house. Goodnight, Jack.” Jessie shrugged his hand away.


Well, if that don’t beat all. Seems like she’d rather spend time talkin’ with a damn Indian than me,” he muttered as he stomped off across the lawn.

Smiling to herself, Jessie walked up the front porch steps. Lifting herself onto the banister, she leaned back against the post, crossed her booted feet at the ankles, and gazed in the direction of the bunkhouse.


Jessie?” Charlotte pushed open the front screen door. “I thought you had already left with Jack for the evenin’.”


I changed my mind.” Jessie breathed a bored sigh. “All he ever talks about is that stupid buggy his daddy bought for him.” She reopened the two buttons on her blouse, fanned herself with her hand against the night heat. “A real man woulda worked and earned his own money.”


Well! That’s a first.” Charlotte leaned over, resting both hands, palm down, on the banister to stare over at her. “Your daddy buys you everything under the sun and I’ve never heard you complain before.”


Oh, Mama,” Jessie gave her an impatient look, “it’s different with girls. That’s what fathers are supposed to do. Boys should earn their own way in the world. Take Two Spirits for instance.” Jessie’s voice warmed to the subject. “He’s workin’ just so his mother and little sister can eat. Now he’s a real man!” She slapped a hand down on her knees, giving emphasis to her words. “Not like that little snot-nosed Jack Sinclair.”


How in the world do you know that?” Charlotte peered at her in the waning light.


Two Spirits told me.” Jessie braced her feet against the post and, giving a strong push, sat up straighter on the banister. “I talk to him sometimes when he’s out workin’ the horses.”

An uneasy feeling she couldn’t explain settled over Charlotte. Although she had nothing against the Blackfeet herself, it still wouldn’t do for Jessie to be alone with one. “I don’t think it’s a good idea for you to be around him, Jessie.” Charlotte turned her back to the banister, folding her arms across her chest. “If your father caught you, there’d be the devil to pay.”


We’re just talkin’, Mama. Nothin’ more.” Jessie closed her eyes in a brief moment of annoyance. “Anyways, I think it’s good to learn about how others live. It makes us appreciate how well off we are compared to those less-fortunate.”


Still and all, Jessie, I don’t want you hangin’ `round botherin’ him. He has work to do. If your father sees he ain’t doin’ his work, he’ll fire him. Do you want that to happen? Now that you know he has a family to feed?”


No,” Jessie whispered, a far away look in her eyes. “For him to have to leave is the last thing in the world I would want.”


Then remember that the next time you feel like talkin’ to him. Another thing, if the other ranch hands see you hangin’ `round him, they’ll make his life harder here. They’re already jealous of how well he works horses. They’ll use any excuse to get rid of him. I hope you don’t give them one.”


Miz Charlotte,” Hattie pushed open the screen door. “Ah gots us sum coffee po’ed. You best come on befo’ it gits cole.”


I’ll be right there, Hattie,” she said. “Jessie,” Charlotte turned, giving her daughter her full attention, “how would you like to take a trip to Helena? We can do some shoppin’ and eat at that great restaurant you love so much.”


I don’t think so, Mama. I feel like stayin’ here on the ranch. I been thinkin’ about plantin’ a garden this year.” Jessie watched her mother to see her reaction. “I’m sure Hattie would appreciate it. And what we don’t use, we could give away.”


Why, I think that’s a wonderful idea.” Charlotte reached out, hugging Jessie close. “Sounds like my little girl’s finally growin’ up and thinkin’ for herself.”


About time. Don’t you think?”


Come on, I’ll have Hattie fix you some hot chocolate and you can tell her all about your plans to plant a garden.”

Jessie had just slipped off the banister when she saw a shadow move across the lawn. “Thanks, Mama, but I think I’ll stay out here on the porch for a little while. That big barn owl’s flyin’ ‘round and I like hearin’ him callin’ out to the others.”


All right.” Charlotte walked into the house.

Wasting no time, Jessie ran around the side of the house where she could stand undetected and wait to see in which direction Two Spirits walked. As she saw him disappear into the tall pines skirting the west side of the property, her heart raced with happiness. “He’s goin’ to meet me!” Within moments, she stood just a few feet away from him.


I knew you would come,” Jessie whispered.

Whirling, he stared at her, his mouth open in shock, his heart racing in fear of being seen alone with her. “You should not be here, Jessie. I did not come here to meet you. I came to gather the moss growing on the trees.”


Why would you need to gather moss?” Jessie moved closer.


The stallion has a raw spot on his back where the saddle rubbed against him. I tried to tell them he could not carry that much weight yet, but they would not listen. The moss will draw out the soreness. That is all I can do for him.”


When I saw you goin’ toward the trees, I thought you had come to meet me. I feel like such a fool.” The happy feelings she had been enjoying scant moments earlier disappeared and she turned to leave.


Jessie,” Two Spirits took her hand then regretted his impulsive move as her fragrance assaulted his senses, “I do not wish to bring you pain, but pain is all I can offer you. You must not reach out to me.”


Because you’re Indian and I’m white? Does the color of our skin really matter that much?” Feelings of guilt fought their way into her thoughts as she recalled the many times she had pulled her skirts to one side rather than risk brushing up against one of them.


Yes, little one, it does. You are a very beautiful girl, Jessie.” Two Spirits gazed into her eyes, knowing he meant every word he told her. “Find someone of your own race who can fill your heart with happy feelings. With me, all you would know is sadness.”


And if I am willin’ to take that chance, would you still turn your face from me?” Hope jumped in her heart as she waited to hear his answer.


I have no choice. Blackfeet males are raised to put others first. I could never be selfish enough to risk bringing trouble to those who trust in me.”

Her dark eyes reflected the pain her young heart now felt. “I don’t understand.”


Your father and the others would not stop with me.” He wanted to shake her and, at the same time, to pull her into his arms. “They would go to the reservation and demand payment from my people because they are of my blood.” He dropped her hand, forced himself to step away.


Oh, Two Spirits, no.” She shook her head in denial. “My father would never do that. He loves me. All he wants is my happiness.”


That is why he would do it, Jessie. I have seen the way he looks at you.” Unable to stop himself, Two Spirits brushed a strand of her long hair back over her shoulder. “You are his child. The most important person in his world.” Before he could pull his hand back, she leaned in close to take his face between her hands and pull his full mouth down to hers. When she drew away, they were both left shaking.


There’s no reason to fear me, Two Spirits. I would never do anything to hurt you. I love you. I knew it the first moment I laid eyes on you. My feelings have only grown stronger in the weeks since I have found you. And the day will come when you’ll learn to love me too,” she told him, before turning and running back to the house.

Although he knew what he should do, right then all his eyes could see was the young girl with hair the color of the sunset whose very touch left him weak and unable to think.

***

Safe in her big four-poster bed with the heavy feathered mattress and homemade quilts, Jessie thought about what she had done. Closing her mind to all the ugliness she had grown up hearing about Indians, she chose instead to bring his handsome image to the forefront of her thoughts. Basking in the soft glow from the oil-lamp, she stretched her slender body out straight, reliving each moment, each word they had said to one another while together. What happened between Two Spirits and herself would be known just to the two of them. For the first time in her young life, she had done something all on her own. She had fallen in love.

Throwing back the covers, she knelt down beside the bed. Lifting one end of the heavy mattress, she found what she was looking for. The diary her father had brought back for her from Helena. Anxious now, she turned the already filled pages until she found the one dated for today. “Dear Diary”, she wrote, “tonight I kissed the man I love.”

Chapter Fourteen

 

The shadows of night gave way to the first light of dawn. Lying in her bed, Jessie ran a tired hand over her burning eyes, yawning as the images plaguing her throughout each night for weeks, faded. Turning onto her side, she closed her eyes.

A light breeze blowing through the open window offered up vague bits of conversation mixed with laughter and more than a few curses as the ranch hands left the bunkhouse on their way to the corrals. Flipping back the covers, Jessie bounded to her feet. Grabbing up a light-blue chenille robe, she yanked it on over her nightdress. Being careful to position herself off to one side, she drew back the curtain, peering out over the yard below. At first she couldn’t see him, as she tried to look everywhere at once to be sure she didn’t miss him.

When she did catch sight of him, she almost wished she hadn’t. She wanted to lean out the window and call him to come inside. Bared to the waist, Two Spirits pumped cold water into a washpan then carried the pan inside the empty bunkhouse.


Why ain’t he usin’ the hot water the hands always keep on the wood stove to wash up?” she whispered, shivering as she waited for him to come back outside.

When at last he walked out of the bunkhouse, he dumped the dirty water on the ground then walked over to the pump. Reaching behind his head, he untied the piece of leather he used to tie back his long black hair. Freed, the silky hair fell down his back almost to the waistband of his jeans.

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