Fear and Aggression (49 page)

“
So, no one knew that you
had killed her?”

“
You are the only one that
ever knew. Central Command, and everyone else believed that you
took her back alive. That you stayed to protect our secrets, and to
become an ambassador. You are a hero, Steve. You have no idea how
good this has all worked out.”

Steve just stared at her with his eyes wide
open.

“
I did everything I could
to protect you. I know how you felt about the things that I did,”
she looked down subconsciously as she said that, “but I hoped…hope
that you still care about me.” There was a long and awkward pause.
“I wasn’t really kidding when I asked if we were still going out. I
haven’t been with anyone. I still consider myself with
you.”

Steve knew that it was his turn to speak. He
was at an utter and complete loss for words. “You’ve caught me by
surprise. I really don’t know what I think or feel right now.”
Tammy nodded slowly, and showed a glimpse of disappointment on her
face. “I’m still rather confused about everything. You’re the
President, how did that happen?” The question was genuine, but he
tried to smile good naturedly.

The powerful Tammy came out now. The look of
the long lost lover was gone. Steve had seen this look before,
though it was rarely directed at him. “Things were in disarray when
we arrived at the station. The President, who was trying to save
his re-election with that attack on Aspiria’s planet, was now
afraid for his life—forget the election. People were disgusted by
what they saw during the attack. I don’t know if you were aware,
but they filmed the whole attack and fed it as instantly as
possible for general viewing. I doubt that you would want to see
it, but it is available if you wanted to. It was sickening to
watch. Somehow he, or his advisors, thought that he could get the
people’s thirst for blood quenched, and that then he could begin
diplomatic relations with the Aspiria’s people. Well, I guess it
sort of worked, but he was ousted in a landslide on election day.
Before he left he took Commander Winton out. He tried to make him
the fall guy for the full attack. People were glad to see him go
to, but it didn’t help the President’s re-election.”

Steve’s interest was piqued. “When was
Commander Winton sacked?”

“
Within a week of the
attack. He was essentially on his way out when we got to the
station. Anything in regards to the attack, or in causing harm to
Aspiria was now the greatest of evils. You, however, were quickly
becoming the hero. I painted as heroic a picture of you as I could.
The public was like a pendulum. They had been pushed through their
irrational fear to a blood thirsty hatred of the aliens. But when
they saw them up close, they saw themselves—they saw themselves
being attacked for no good reason, like lambs to the slaughter. We
were everything that we feared. The people wouldn’t blame
themselves, so they took it out on the President and on Commander
Winton.

“
Because of what you had
done, at least what I told them that you had done, our ship and
crew was beloved by the people. You had disobeyed direct orders by
the President and the Commander, and had done ‘the right thing.’
Everyone’s career benefited by the circumstances, but I was in the
best position. The clip of Aspiria and I together, showed us to be
friends. I was the only witness of your choosing to go back with
Aspiria. I was interviewed by everyone. My research became world
renowned. I had everything that I could have ever wanted, except
for you.”

Steve nodded slowly. His attraction for
Tammy had been reawakened.

“
As the fizzle of fame
began to die down, and life became normalized again, I began to get
very down. I was missing you and worried about you. I began to
reflect on where things had gone wrong with us. I thought about the
fetus that I had carried, and for the first time I wished that I
had that child. I wished to have a part of you with me. I wondered
about how the child would look, how it would be like you, and how
it would be like me. That child would be nearly five years old
right now. The child’s father would be the greatest hero in the
world, and the child’s mother would be the President of the United
States.”

Tears began to slowly well up in Steve’s
eyes. As he stared at Tammy, he could see glistening moisture in
her eyes, also. “I also began to feel something deeper than regret
for euthanizing Aspiria. I went through a period of soul searching.
I felt a deep remorse for my choices and a great sorrow for your
loss. I never thought that you had died. I think that was because
of Aspiria. She was so forgiving and kind that I thought that you
may have been spared by her people. Still, I worried myself sick
sometimes. I felt that it was my fault, whatever may have happened
to you. If I hadn’t euthanized her, you would have just let her go,
and you would be back with me. I also felt for the loss of Aspiria.
At first, I couldn’t look past her as an alien and my subject. But
as the months past, I reflected on her with feelings of friendship.
I had gotten so down and felt so much darkness that the only people
that I wanted to see were my child that I had aborted, Aspiria who
I had euthanized, and my boyfriend who I had caused to be marooned
on an alien planet. These were the darkest days of my life.”

There was a pause. Tammy was not looking at
Steve; she had turned in her chair and was looking to her left.
“The new President wanted to meet with me. I had a one-on-one
meeting in here. He didn’t know what to do about you. He really
didn’t want to send the Space Force anywhere near the planet. It
hadn’t worked out so well for the last President. The Space Force
was out and about anywhere that they were not likely to run into
anything. The last thing that he wanted in his first four years was
an alien crisis.

“
I was still afraid of
everyone finding out what I did to Aspiria. I knew that I had
obeyed orders, and that I was not going to be in any legal trouble,
but I didn’t want to lose my reputation—my credibility. I really
wanted you back, but at that time I feared that you would have
nothing to do with me anyway. I told him that it would be best to
leave the Space Force away from the planet. I told him that you
would be fine, and that there was much that you could accomplish
from there. I told him to wait until he had been re-elected to go
on a reconnaissance mission.

“
I was sitting right where
you are sitting, and he was sitting right where I am. He was putty
in my hands. I was in complete control. I was sitting with the
President, and he was powerless compared to me. Steve, you are the
only man that I have not felt more powerful than. Anyway, I left
feeling better inside. I felt that I could still be useful. Our
last President was a joke. He would have never won the election if
it wasn’t for the circumstances. He was a completely useless
President. I began to realize my place in the world. I was not just
a famous scientist, but I was a power to be reckoned with. I could
do this. I could become the President, and I could actually provide
leadership. The people trusted and adored me. I could get things
back; I could set them right. I had a mission and that was to be
the person calling the shots. I could then get you back, and then
we could, together, truly build a peaceful relationship with
Aspiria’s world. It was within my power, and I knew it. The
darkness was gone, and I was ready to take on this
cause.

“
I’m yet to discover
anything that I am not good at. As it turns out, I’m a top notch
politician. I was elected with ease—not quite the landslide as the
previous election, but still 56% isn’t bad; forty-six states, too.
I won’t bore you with the details, but among the things that I am
doing, I’ve actually got the Space Force back looking for the other
worlds that Aspiria was so confident in. Kenny and James are hot on
the trail as we speak. I’ve got you back, and I’m ready for the
most important step. We need to setup peaceful relations between
our worlds. Steve, I want to do this
together
. You and I,
together
. We can set off
in a few days. I know that you just got back, but we could do
something more important than has ever been done before. We’ve
already done that, literally, hand-in-hand. Finding them was huge;
but bridging our worlds and making a peaceful union between them,
now that would be something.”

Tammy’s eyes bore deep
into him. His attraction and love for her had been reawakened. What
she said made so much sense. Still, there was a nagging discomfort
in his soul. He could not place it though. Maybe he wanted to spend
some time back on earth. Perhaps he just wanted to let Aspiria and
her world alone. What was the point of setting up relations at all
with them. Just let them alone, they are fine without us. No, that
wasn’t’ it. He was kind of excited to go with Tammy;
would the President really travel aboard my
ship?
Plus he wouldn’t be gone that long,
this time. Aspiria and her people would love to learn about our
world, and there was much that our world could learn from theirs.
It was a good thing. So what was it that was bothering
him.

“
We’ve better get going,
or people might start wondering what’s going on in here,” she said
smiling and raising her eyebrows. “I’ve arranged for you to have
accommodations here at the White House, and we can talk again
tomorrow.” She got up from her seat, and Steve did the same. Rather
than walk towards the door, Tammy met Steve and embraced him. She
gave him a short kiss, and he could feel the electricity. He felt
both the exhilaration of romance and an increased uneasiness. Was
he bothered by what she had done, by the abortion and her trying to
kill Aspiria? If that was it, then what about forgiveness? He had
been forgiven for all that he had done by Aspiria and her family.
The people there had forgiven them for the attack. He had lived
amongst a people ready to forgive and had enjoy the fruits of
receiving forgiveness. He had not, perhaps, actively forgiven
Tammy, but he did not feel bitterness towards her—quite the
opposite. He felt as though he may want to rekindle the
romance.

They were now walking towards the door and
Tammy had her arm around his waist. The nagging feeling began to
eat at him, while his heart began to swell towards her.

That’s
it
, he thought—
deception. Everything that is, here on earth, is based on
deception. Deception: that I took Aspiria back alive and chose to
stay and guard our secrets. Deception: that Tammy had not tried,
and actually succeeded in killing her. Deception: that Tammy and I
have never been together, that our relationship is professional
alone. She is the President because of fabrications. I returned to
earth as a hero because of lies, and they will continue. We will
always know what is real, but we will live out this falsehood for
our own protection and fame.

Tammy had Danny go and get me, and leave
immediately. No time to talk and find out what is happening on that
world. ‘Don’t ask Captain Jenners any questions, I will question
him alone. Don’t take him to the space station, take him directly
here.’

Aspiria is alive, she could tell the tale.
No, because Tammy and I will go alone to set up diplomatic
relations. No one, other than those who already know the truth,
will ever find out. She has this set up perfectly, but it is all
based on lies. She said herself that she is a ‘top notch
politician.’

“
It’s so good to see you
again, Steve,” Tammy said as they approached the door. “I will see
you tomorrow, and we should be on our way soon. Everything is
working out just as we had always hoped,” she said with a smile as
they walked a few more paces.

That’s the thing about Aspiria’s world: it’s
true. There’s no deception. The people aren’t perfect, but they are
honest. I loved that about living on her world. I have live
honestly among them for these many years. There was no pretext as
to who I am, or what I am. I was accepted and forgiven, and allowed
to live as a better man in spite of all that I had caused to be
done to them.

But before…oh, before! I was secretive about
everything. I let Bob navigate before he was ready so that I could
carry on a hidden affair with Tammy. I tried to conceal her
pregnancy so that I could figure out how to get away with it. I
lied to Central Command and most of the crew, and told them that we
would kill Aspiria when I intended to save her. Death has been the
fruit of the dishonesty that I have sown. The attack on Aspiria’s
world, the abortion of my child, and even the poisoning of Aspiria
were all directly related to my deceits. I don’t want to live a
life of deception anymore.

“
Just remember, when we’re
alone we are Steve and Tammy, but at any other time we’re President
Rodgers and Captain Jenners,” said the President with a wink as she
opened the door of the Oval Office.

Dane Bagley studied philosophy at Brigham
Young University, but received his bachelor of science in
physiological optics from the University of Alabama at Birmingham,
in 1999. He then received his Doctor of Optometry degree from the
University of Alabama at Birmingham School of Optometry, in 2001.
He is the owner and doctor of Perfect Optical Eyecare Center in
Huntsville, Alabama. He resides with his wife, two sons, and two
daughters in Madison, Alabama. He enjoys sports, games, and
gardening with the family. He also enjoys serving in his
church.